Parrothead Posted February 3, 2011 Share Posted February 3, 2011 (edited) Hi, I'm Chucki the Parrothead. I'm a training widow and an ex-cop. This is my story. About a month ago dh came home as excited as a squirrel on speed. Yup, another training opportunity. This time offensive driving. If I heard the words "pit maneuver" once I heard them 500 times during the month. Everyone we came in contact with heard them at least once. The time finally came for dh to head to Bangor for his flight. It was an early flight so he spend the night in a hotel. Tragedy struck about 10:30 in the evening. The phone rang. Dh was on the other end. He is coming home. Due to snow and other bad weather in NY his flight was canceled. The travel agency could not get him to California by any other route or means. The disappointment cut deep. No pit maneuver training. No skid pan. No high speed chases. Oh, the horrors. What is a good cop to do? Follow the rules, man. Follow the rules. Two weeks after the misadventure, fortune shined on dh. He can get into the next class. He leaves in a week. This time the happiness was tempered with caution. And where things start to go wrong for me. Since he was so preoccupied about the state of the weather it seems dh forgot to take care of a few things before he left. It wasn't the storm of the century for us. For others, it seemed like it was. But for us this far north the storm was part of every day life. You bundle up, clear the snow, get on with life. Since I'm the training widow this week it was up to me to make sure the drive was clear so we could get on with life. I've got a tai chi lesson tonight that I would like to get to. It will be the only IRL adult interaction I have all week. So things are going well. The snowblower starts like a champ. With 10.5 horse power this monster is making good time and removing the snow like nobody's business. I'm down at the end of the drive, just pulling out into the street. I looked both ways. "Choke!" "Cough." "Sputter." There was a sudden silence. The snowblower was out of gas. How can this be? Dh always makes sure to fill up the gas in the machine and in the can. He knows I get violently ill from the smell of gasoline. "Oy!" I said, along with a few other choice words. Now the snowblower is electric start. I'm not sure exactly if anything needs to be done to make it pull crank capable. I dare not wait to ask Reg or Bill. I might not get a hold of them in a timely manner. Such is the way of internet message boarding. And the snowblower is standing in the street. I find it deep within me to pull the 500 pound contraption 50 feet back up the drive way in the soft powder we call snow. Even though I'd cleared half of the drive the going was treacherous. I slipped and fell. I got up and dusted myself off. My heart was pounding. My throat was dry. But I have the determination that only a homeschooling mom can have. I finally dragged that sucker back to the garage. I grabbed the gas can only to find it...EMPTY! What is this? Is the Pit Maneuver such a great distraction? Are dreams of sliding in the skid pan taking over reality? Why the bloody blazes is the gas can empty? Well, dang-flabbit! I've got to go get gas. I notify dd of the need and set off to the gas station two blocks from the house. The gas can is filled, and I'm able to return home to finish the job. Thanks to the kind prayers of my friends and four different kinds of medication. I've no trouble with the cold. It all turned out well and I'm alive to tell the tale. Now I must go shower and get some of these layers off. Dh will be arriving soon and I do want him to beg forgiveness... just a little. Edited February 3, 2011 by Parrothead Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lawana Posted February 3, 2011 Share Posted February 3, 2011 :lol: I can so relate. When ds was an infant and dd a toddler, dh was working in CA for 3 weeks at a time. One January day, we had a storm and lost power. Unphased, I got the neighbor to help me start the portable generator, and all was well. Until... the generator quit. Yep. Burned the dang windings up. And since the gen was the back up plan, there was no alternative heat source. It was too icy to drive, too icy to even walk. And the phone went out too. That was the longest 36 hours I've ever lived. And I still give dh a hard time about being in *sunny* southern California, while I was freezing alone with 2 little ones! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mynyel Posted February 3, 2011 Share Posted February 3, 2011 THAT... was a great story! The last bit about your dh begging for forgiveness...:smilielol5: and :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kalphs Posted February 3, 2011 Share Posted February 3, 2011 Great story!:hurray: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mommaduck Posted February 3, 2011 Share Posted February 3, 2011 Ack! You poor thing! :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kathleen in VA Posted February 3, 2011 Share Posted February 3, 2011 Great read! Thanks for sharing. You are one trooper, too. I would've stayed home.:) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sparkle Posted February 3, 2011 Share Posted February 3, 2011 Oh, my, you certainly went above and beyond the call of duty. I think him begging for forgiveness would be very appropriate :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parrothead Posted February 3, 2011 Author Share Posted February 3, 2011 :lol:I can so relate. When ds was an infant and dd a toddler, dh was working in CA for 3 weeks at a time. One January day, we had a storm and lost power. Unphased, I got the neighbor to help me start the portable generator, and all was well. Until... the generator quit. Yep. Burned the dang windings up. And since the gen was the back up plan, there was no alternative heat source. It was too icy to drive, too icy to even walk. And the phone went out too. That was the longest 36 hours I've ever lived. And I still give dh a hard time about being in *sunny* southern California, while I was freezing alone with 2 little ones! Oh, I can just imagine it. Great story!:hurray: THAT... was a great story! The last bit about your dh begging for forgiveness...:smilielol5: and :grouphug: Thanks. A great writer I'll never be. While I was taking care of things I thought it would hilarious as a day-in-the-life-of type story. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parrothead Posted February 3, 2011 Author Share Posted February 3, 2011 Ack! You poor thing! :grouphug: Nothing hurt but my pride. Great read! Thanks for sharing. You are one trooper, too. I would've stayed home.:) I've got to get out. We spend the weekend through Monday with dd sick then the next two days really getting busy with school. I haven't left the house since Sunday afternoon. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Princess Peach Posted February 3, 2011 Share Posted February 3, 2011 That gave me a great chuckle after a difficult homeschooling morning. :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Truscifi Posted February 3, 2011 Share Posted February 3, 2011 Great story! And it is a good illustration of why I will never move north. :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Giraffe Posted February 3, 2011 Share Posted February 3, 2011 Great story. DH dang well better ask for forgiveness! Skid pan my @rse - the gas can needs filled!! Thanks for the chuckle - needed it in my cabin fevered state. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FaithManor Posted February 3, 2011 Share Posted February 3, 2011 Parrothead, You have earned the womanhood medal of honor for going above and beyond the call of duty and of sacred vows to assist the man-child you have married!!!! (Man-child being said not as an insult but as an understanding of this kind of thing because I have one of "those" too!!!) This earns you the right to a large helping of whatever it is that floats your boat and THAT MAN HAD BETTER KNOW WHAT THAT IS AND BRING PLENTY OF IT!!!!! My man-child did something similar to me. He called an hour ago to announce that the rocketry team has to have a meeting tonight and they'll all be here by 6:30! Now, my house is disasterified.....you may not have heard this term - if it were in the dictionary, there would be a picture of my hubby surrounded by all of his hobbies. It means that he has five, count them FIVE, different projects going on every flat surface he can find and hasn't cleaned up one thing. I am trying to walk around boxes of rocketry supplies, tool boxes, tubs and tackle boxes of electronics, three physics kits, and the lamb rescue stuff (out today in case we get a lamb call). The kids decided that today of all days, they'd actually be considerate and bring their laundry out without being hounded like rented mules. EXCEPT I AM NOT DOING LAUNDRY TODAY! So, there is a huge pile of boy clothing in front of the bi-fold doors in the family room where my washer and dryer are housed. He of course, will not skate in from his meetings until the last possible minute and then will yell, "Where's my??? Have you seen???? How come this got moved????" The kids dropped their schoolwork and are starting to clean. I hadn't eaten lunch yet and decided to retreat into my bedroom with my salad and check in on the Hive before I begin running the kids like an army drill sergeant. Seriously, there had better be a bouquet of spring flowers in my life within a week or this guy is in some trouble. Faith Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Giraffe Posted February 3, 2011 Share Posted February 3, 2011 DH actually proposed that I might be able to get out of the house tonight by going with him to his hacker space meeting (I call them the dorks). He took two very big steps backwards at the look on my face. :cursing: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parrothead Posted February 3, 2011 Author Share Posted February 3, 2011 Parrothead, You have earned the womanhood medal of honor for going above and beyond the call of duty and of sacred vows to assist the man-child you have married!!!! (Man-child being said not as an insult but as an understanding of this kind of thing because I have one of "those" too!!!) This earns you the right to a large helping of whatever it is that floats your boat and THAT MAN HAD BETTER KNOW WHAT THAT IS AND BRING PLENTY OF IT!!!!! My man-child did something similar to me. He called an hour ago to announce that the rocketry team has to have a meeting tonight and they'll all be here by 6:30! Now, my house is disasterified.....you may not have heard this term - if it were in the dictionary, there would be a picture of my hubby surrounded by all of his hobbies. It means that he has five, count them FIVE, different projects going on every flat surface he can find and hasn't cleaned up one thing. I am trying to walk around boxes of rocketry supplies, tool boxes, tubs and tackle boxes of electronics, three physics kits, and the lamb rescue stuff (out today in case we get a lamb call). The kids decided that today of all days, they'd actually be considerate and bring their laundry out without being hounded like rented mules. EXCEPT I AM NOT DOING LAUNDRY TODAY! So, there is a huge pile of boy clothing in front of the bi-fold doors in the family room where my washer and dryer are housed. He of course, will not skate in from his meetings until the last possible minute and then will yell, "Where's my??? Have you seen???? How come this got moved????" The kids dropped their schoolwork and are starting to clean. I hadn't eaten lunch yet and decided to retreat into my bedroom with my salad and check in on the Hive before I begin running the kids like an army drill sergeant. Seriously, there had better be a bouquet of spring flowers in my life within a week or this guy is in some trouble. Faith This is one thing dh won't do. We have food issues here that have really escalated in the last year. Man-child is exactly how I'd describe him. :lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parrothead Posted February 3, 2011 Author Share Posted February 3, 2011 Great story. DH dang well better ask for forgiveness! Skid pan my @rse - the gas can needs filled!! Thanks for the chuckle - needed it in my cabin fevered state. The beauty of it is he has to come home via Macy's. Opps. I mean via Bangor. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FaithManor Posted February 3, 2011 Share Posted February 3, 2011 Parrothead, Back and foot rubs are free! Put that man-child on notice. I have never successfully trained this kind of behavior out of mine, but I have learned to take advantage of this flaw! Snicker, snicker Faith Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heatherwith4 Posted February 3, 2011 Share Posted February 3, 2011 You're awesome! :) I do understand the desperate need to get out of the house! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Unicorn. Posted February 3, 2011 Share Posted February 3, 2011 A great writer I'll never be. While I was taking care of things I thought it would hilarious as a day-in-the-life-of type story. What do you mean, not a great writer?! That was great! Who else could have taken a simple "I'm gonna kill dh for forgetting the gas" story, and put such a spin on it. He better beg good! :lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parrothead Posted February 3, 2011 Author Share Posted February 3, 2011 What do you mean, not a great writer?! That was great! Who else could have taken a simple "I'm gonna kill dh for forgetting the gas" story, and put such a spin on it. He better beg good! :lol: Thank you. I'll cop to comedy writer or at least comedic story teller. :D The next great American novel isn't in me though. ;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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