Advice needed; cat and asthma

[BellaMama]

Could you please guide me as to how I should proceed with the following situation?

 

We have a new family physician (yay!) who told us in no uncertain terms that due to our DD8's asthma and allergies, we need to give our cat away. Of course it is completely reasonable, I am not refuting that at all. DD has always been very careful not approching/petting the cat, washing her hands if she sits on cat hair on the couch...Although it feels odd writing our routine, it is our "normal". It is bad for DD's health, the cat is leaving.

 

Where I am having a difficult time is how to proceed.

 

1. Find a new home: I have tried and honestly, she is an old cat, we love her, but she is not very friendly.She is an indoor cat.

2.Bring the cat to the vet to have her euthanized: DD will be devastated as she will feel responsible. Should I lie and say she the cat was sick? I am afraid DD will see through that. (She knows the cat must go, she was present at the MD's office.)

3. Humane Society : where she might get a new home, in reality probably not, be stressed for the last few weeks of her life and die alone...

 

 

I have to do what is right for my daughter's health and I don't want her to feel guilty for giving up our pet.

Sad, of course, guilty, no.

What do I tell her?

[Dana]

Do you have any no-kill shelters in your area?

 

It's a very hard thing you're doing. I do applaud you for taking the health of your daughter seriously. My husband's asthma is under control now that we don't have a cat.

 

I think the only humane options are either to find someone to adopt your cat yourself, find a no-kill shelter or fostering organization, or the kinder death would be to have her put to sleep at your vet with you there. That's much kinder than sending her to a shelter where she'd be killed.

 

:grouphug: for a tough time.

[BellaMama]

Thanks Dana,

 

It is hard. I can assume responsibility, I'm just not sure how to present it to the children.

[elegantlion]

Look for a no kill shelter or perhaps call retirement homes, perhaps a senior citizen would like an older pet.

 

IMO I would absolutely not have the cat euthanized. Not only is it not fair to the cat, it could be extremely guilt ridden for your dd. I wouldn't lie about it and I wouldn't take her to the humane society.

 

I would exhaust every option to rehome the pet.

 

Other options would include calling every vet in town, use the guilt plea if necessary. Some vets have soft spots for hard cases like that. The vet I used to work for would sometimes take in a pet like that and let them live at the clinic until we could find another home.

[Desert Rat]

We were in your situation 10 years ago. We had 2 cats for 7 years. My dh had bleeding, scaling excema over 90% of his body. It was awful and it was caused by the cats. We had one put down because she wouldn't survive a move. The other lived under my mom's bed until a year ago. I regret not putting her down as well as she was never happy after the move.

Now, we didn't have a child's emotions to contend with. My oldest was only 1 and didn't know any better. But, I think euthanasia is the kindest thing to do for an old cat. Yes, it will be hard and it will take a long time to feel okay about it. But, if you explain your decision as the KINDEST for an old cat, I think you're daughter will understand.

I want to add that after we had the cats out of the home, I took all the upholstered furniture out of every room and steam cleaned it. I washed all the walls down in every room and steam cleaned the carpeting. At the same time I took anything fabric that could fit in the washer out of the house and brought it in only after it had been washed and dried (my washer/dryer is out in our garage, so this was easy). I also encased all the mattresses in the house. This brought my dh's allergic reactions under control. This ended up being a good thing because both of my boys have asthma and severe allergies.

HTH and I'm so sorry you have to experience this! :(

[Mejane]

This is awful, but I really think if I couldn't find a new home, I would euthanize the cat and lie to my kids. I'd tell them I found it a home, let them say their goodbyes and take it in myself. I could live with the guilt; I wouldn't want them to. Sorry you have to make such a decision.

[gardening momma]

Do you have any no-kill shelters in your area?

I would definitely try to go this route. We got our cats at a no-kill shelter (I believe it was "no-kill" unless there was a behavioral or serious health problem). They had a couple of cats there that just hung out in the main lobby area, and were right at home sitting on the desks/counters. It was obvious that they were well-loved.

[sbgrace]

:grouphug: That's really difficult. Allergy triggered asthma when a family pet is a trigger is such a heart breaking situation and we found ourselves there as well.

 

We rehomed our old cat just as the other had passed naturally. Relatives took her. I had talked to vets previously and I was told that it was going to be nearly impossible to rehome an old cat. I get that. I was fortunate we had someone willing to take her out of sympathy and she's happy. Of course it was still sad. After shampooing, hepa unit in the main room, etc. it has greatly improved asthma control for my son and I, honestly, didn't think the cat was a major trigger for him. That's why we didn't really beg relatives until the other cat had passed. I just didn't think it was bothering him that much as he has other allergies that seemed bigger. It doesn't hurt to call vets and such but I'd think you'll have more luck "begging" anyone you know who is an animal lover/has cats to take one more old cat for the health of your daughter.

 

I don't think euthanasia is cruel honestly if that is your only option. I'd do that where she can pass in your arms rather than a shelter where she will be put down without someone who loves her. But I agree too traumatic for your daughter and lying wouldn't be a good idea either. I hope you can find a home.

 

Is her bedroom cat free with a HEPA unit? Our first allergist suggested, if we couldn't get rid of our cats, that we:

 

1. cat free bedroom with HEPA (and hard surface floors if possible and dust precautions as our house dust would contain cat dander/most asthmatics are dust allergic anyway I suspect)

2. shower right before bed and change into "cat and house where cat goes" free bedclothes. His bedclothes were always in that cat free, hepa unit bedroom. No one went in his room after lounging around the house and picking up cat hair so essentially his bedroom was for sleeping after he was clean. My point is even if she's "cat free" when she goes to sleep if she's spending time, say, reading on her bed after sitting on the couch she's bringing cat to her bed and sleeping in it.

3. wipe the cats down with wet paper towels several times a day (I can't remember the logic she shared re: that one but I've since read it as a way to live with an allergy trigger pet)

4. HEPA vacuum with frequent vacuuming of floors and upholstery etc.

5. I note this below as we didn't do it until post cat and the allergist hadn't mentioned but a HEPA unit for our main daily living area helped my son a lot.

 

 

It was still better when the cats were gone and that surprised me. I will say, though, that cat dander will remain in the home long after the cat is gone even if you clean. You just can't get all the cat out. I read somewhere that homes that have ever had a cat living in them contain cat dander even when the family with cat is long gone. We did a lot of work (shampooing everything, changing air filters, washing all the curtains, etc.) rid the place of cat and I'm certain it's still here. When we finally broke down and got a great HEPA unit for the family room where he spends a lot of time and so did the cats (with carpet, furniture, etc.) that helped the most and this was well post cat and post deep cleaning as well. I think a great HEPA in your home even now may help a lot even if the cat stays.

Edited January 9, 2011 by sbgrace

[Lolly]

This is awful, but I really think if I couldn't find a new home, I would euthanize the cat and lie to my kids. I'd tell them I found it a home, let them say their goodbyes and take it in myself. I could live with the guilt; I wouldn't want them to. Sorry you have to make such a decision.

 

:iagree: I would do everything I could to rehome the cat. If I could not, I would most certainly lie to my kids and tell them someone had taken the cat in. I would consider this one of those lies like telling Aunt Margie that her dress didn't make her look fat when she asked at Cousin Joe's wedding.

[AuntieM]

Just reiterating that rehoming the cat isn't the end of the remedy. You will have to clean EVERYTHING. When my mom had surgery I cleaned her place while she was in the hospital. With one small dachshund, there was pet hair on the baseboards, on all the furniture, to the tops of all the draperies and stuck flat to the surfaces on the walls. I had to wash it ALL. If I were in your shoes, I would even consider having my ventilation system professionally cleaned.

 

We have cat allergies in our family, so none will enter our home. But when we go out to visit people who have cats, we have to take all our meds/inhalers. Before we leave home, I empty the washer and have each person enter the house one at a time when we return. They strip in the laundry room and head for a quick shower. Sometimes it takes a while for us each to get into the house and clean, but we do what we can to keep the pet hair out.

 

FWIW, I love animals, but I married into allergies. :glare: