College visit dilemma ...

[dirty ethel rackham]

So, my 17yos has his head firmly in the sand about college. He doesn't want to make any decisions - about anything really, but especially about college. We are working with a therapist on his issues and one thing we agreed upon is that I will schedule the college visits and my son will have veto power. So, I have been researching where to visit. I think he would be best suited at a small school where he will get to know his professors because I don't think he will do well in a place where he is just a number. I feel he needs to visit the schools so he will be more invested in the process come next summer/fall. I think part of him wants to just take the default option of just going to our local liberal arts college which is a lock for him based upon his attendance there now. Part of me wants him to go away because I feel he needs to be more independent and see what's out there.

 

Well, here is the rub. My son takes college classes at the local small LAC which is on 10-week terms. With that kind of schedule, you just don't miss class unless you are deathly ill. Those classes meet MWF (and lab on Thursdays.) He also has an online Latin class that has live meeting times. I am reluctant to have him miss those because he gets so much in class that he doesn't get from the books. Since the college fall term is over, I had planned on doing a couple visits in early December, but, I didn't get the opportunity to make that happen (lots of sick people after Thanksgiving.) They all wanted 2 weeks notice. So, looking ahead to spring - he only has 6 days that he will not have class that do not coincide with the schools' spring breaks. There are 8 schools we would like to visit.

 

So, here is my question ... how important is it for the student to see schools during weekdays when class is in session? Seeing that we are so limited in time, we may have to do a few Saturday visit days. We may need to see some during the summer, but that is definitely not ideal. We will have similar time constraints next fall as well.

[Brenda in MA]

Ellen,

 

I would say visiting during the school term is ideal, but not essential, especially for a first visit. I'd suggest prioritizing the schools and visit those you think would be the best fit while classes are in session. Tour the others on the weekends or in the summer.

 

Once he's applied and has his acceptances/financial aid info come spring of senior year, it might be worth a 2nd visit to his top couple of choices (if you can swing that). These visits I'd try really hard to make happen while school is in session.

 

My older son was a bit ambivalent in his jr year, and I reluctantly dragged him to a few colleges for visits. After visiting the first place, he decided that was definitely where he wanted to go and urged me to cancel the other visits. I told him no, we were going to the other places since he had no basis for comparison. That was spring of junior year. We visited another 3 places over the summer and one that winter. He got more used to the visit process as time went on, and he ended up going to the 2nd place we visited, not the first, and he strongly considered the 4th & 7th places we visited.

 

If your kiddo is a bit reluctant about change and new things, you might need to give more pushes than the average kid would need. You know your child best, so go with your gut in this area. That's what I did.

 

Best wishes,

Brenda

[Beth in OH]

Neither of my two college daughters ever sat in on a class at any college we visited. Their discomfort about feeling conspicuous (even if they blended in perfectly) would have outweighed any benefit. I didn't push it. They were able to get an adequate feel for the school through the regular admissions visit/student tour. My 2nd dd did need a subsequent visit to clarify her thinking, but even then, we talked to profs/administrators with specific questions, rather than sitting in on classes. I don't think weekdays are critical.

 

Beth

[dirty ethel rackham]

Thanks for your input. I am not sure how my son would feel about sitting in on a class. He is taking classes at college right now and has gotten over his initial hesitancy there. But, he is shy and hesitant in new situations. We will see. I definitely will prioritize and visit the top choices first.

[Vida Winter]

Ellen,

 

First I'd try to pare the list down by half and then I'd do as many in the spring or summer as possible. For myself I'd not want to travel in bad weather or show up at a college during that tense time before final exams, and there is the rest of your family to think of - I'd rather spend December doing things for Advent and Christmas. Your situation may be a lot different. For us, college visits require hours of travel and take a lot of planning.

 

Dana

[Alyce]

All the schools my kids applied to had special Saturday visit days set up for parents and kids. It's not a very personal experience as many people prefer these since they don't interrupt their schedule. They usually consist of a tour of the school, an question and answer period for the parents, a conference on financial aid, conferences for the kids to either learn about the major they have chosen or one designed to help them get some idea of what they might want to major in. We found them very informational but you do not sit in on a class. I'm not sure I see any worth in that anyway since so many professors teach differently and if a child is already taking college courses he's going to have a fairly good idea of what it will be like.

[mcconnellboys]

We just did drives around some of the campuses we saw. It still gave us all a feel for what life would be like there. Along with reading about the school on their website, you can still get a pretty clear picture. Then if he really, really likes the school, he can visit later. I'd make sure to tour those schools that you think are most likely good candidates for him....

[In The Great White North]

Lots of colleges won't allow you to sit in on a class even if they are in session. However, you can't get a feel for the students if there aren't any there.

[TravelingChris]

We visited schools in late AUgust of her junior year, then one in June after her junior year, one in July as a summer student and now she has applied. We are visiting our first one she has been accepted to or applied to which is in regular session today. If there is any way you can visit a few this year, I would do it. From that August visit a long time ago, dd did rule out three colleges immediately, one college after some thought and keep two. The bad thing with dd is that while she did apply to three colleges which she has visited, none is her favorite as she has no favorite and all need a re-visit. Why? Because she has rightly decided that while programs and building may be right, she has to live with these people for four years and that better be right. SO off we go in the next hour to visit the first one that is in regular session. Oh and why do I recommend some visits during regular session in junior year- because it is really hard scheduling so many visits in senior year particularly if something happens, like in my case, I broke a leg in August and am still in a walking boot.

[Jane in NC]

In my opinion, visiting while school is in session, attending a class and spending a night in the dorm is ideal. Given that life is not always ideal, I would at least opt for a campus visit, making an appointment with a faculty member in the department of your son's potential major.

 

Regarding those general campus tours: we had two at one liberal arts college. During our first visit, we were the only tour participants. The guide was a student in my son's intended major. She gave us the heads up on faculty, classes, travel opportunities, etc. The second time we visited this campus, we were part of a much larger group. Much of what was said on this tour reflected the material on the website, something which Eliana noted in her post. The ideal campus tour happens not during the busy summer months when families and high school counselors converge on campuses!

 

My son eliminated one of the top three colleges on his list during an overnight visit. He adored the faculty and program, found the campus to be more than adequate, but realized that he would not fit into the student body. Many of the social activities at this school were organized by the fraternities and sororities--just not his thing.

 

We visited a few campuses as a family in the beginning of the process, but after my son's applications were submitted, he visited on his own. This was best for my son so that he could see the schools through his lens--not mine or his Dad's.

 

My son enjoyed sitting in on classes and meeting faculty. Everyone was most welcoming so there was nothing awkward about it!

[dirty ethel rackham]

Most schools we are looking at won't do overnight visits for juniors. Plus, it looks like we will be in a similar situation next year. He will have college classes 3 - 4 days a week and Latin on 2 days a week. I am sure that we will only be able to do really thorough investigations of just a couple schools after we have narrowed things down.

[dirty ethel rackham]

Well, we are concentrating on the Midwest. I really don't think he should go more than a 5 hour drive from home - closer would be ideal (we are in the Chicago suburbs.) Since he is a shy, quiet kid, I think he would do best at a smaller school - one where the professors know his name and care if he is performing up to his capabilities. He has always been interested in science, naturally drawn to biology since he was little - mostly organismal, not micro or biochem. He also expressed an interest in physics. He is the absent-minded professor - the walking encyclopedia who sometimes lacks common sense. He doesn't want to even think about careers. He just likes to learn for the joy of learning. He reads science magazines for fun. I can see him in academia. He is not terribly motivated by money, nor is he materialistic, so I could see him working as a forest ranger or something outdoors. He is a boy scout who loves camping and the outdoors.

 

As far as selectivity of schools - most of the schools we are looking at should be fairly easy for him to get in. His 2008 SAT scores (taken as a freshman) were CR - 660, Math - 660, Writing 740. Based upon more recent practice tests and his PSAT prep, those scores will go up significantly (at least the CR and MATH.) The writing score was mostly based upon his multiple choice. He is a decent writer, but not stellar. He is like his dad - why use 20 words when 5 will do? Our default school is North Central College - since he is already taking classes there, he will likely get in under their Lederman Scholar program and has a guaranteed at least 1/2 tuition scholarship if he chooses that. We are also impressed with the Colleges that Change Lives idea, so we are looking those schools in the area. We are also looking at Catholic universities around here as well. I don't think he would do as well in a big city environment, plus, the Room and Board cost would likely put them out of our reach.

 

Some of the schools on our list:

 

Beloit College

Hope College

Kalamazoo College

Knox College

Bradley University

Illinois Wesleyan University

Augustana College

Valporaiso University

Lawrence University

 

I think St. Louis University and Marquette might be a little big for him - plus SLU is not friendly to homeschoolers - requiring a GED. My husband wants him to at least see Purdue and University of Illinois (our alma maters) but I think he would flounder at either of these places.

[creekland]

Well, we are concentrating on the Midwest. I really don't think he should go more than a 5 hour drive from home - closer would be ideal (we are in the Chicago suburbs.) Since he is a shy, quiet kid, I think he would do best at a smaller school - one where the professors know his name and care if he is performing up to his capabilities. He has always been interested in science, naturally drawn to biology since he was little - mostly organismal, not micro or biochem. He also expressed an interest in physics. He is the absent-minded professor - the walking encyclopedia who sometimes lacks common sense. He doesn't want to even think about careers. He just likes to learn for the joy of learning. He reads science magazines for fun. I can see him in academia. He is not terribly motivated by money, nor is he materialistic, so I could see him working as a forest ranger or something outdoors. He is a boy scout who loves camping and the outdoors.

 

As far as selectivity of schools - most of the schools we are looking at should be fairly easy for him to get in. His 2008 SAT scores (taken as a freshman) were CR - 660, Math - 660, Writing 740. Based upon more recent practice tests and his PSAT prep, those scores will go up significantly (at least the CR and MATH.) The writing score was mostly based upon his multiple choice. He is a decent writer, but not stellar. He is like his dad - why use 20 words when 5 will do? Our default school is North Central College - since he is already taking classes there, he will likely get in under their Lederman Scholar program and has a guaranteed at least 1/2 tuition scholarship if he chooses that. We are also impressed with the Colleges that Change Lives idea, so we are looking those schools in the area. We are also looking at Catholic universities around here as well. I don't think he would do as well in a big city environment, plus, the Room and Board cost would likely put them out of our reach.

 

Some of the schools on our list:

 

Beloit College

Hope College

Kalamazoo College

Knox College

Bradley University

Illinois Wesleyan University

Augustana College

Valporaiso University

Lawrence University

 

I think St. Louis University and Marquette might be a little big for him - plus SLU is not friendly to homeschoolers - requiring a GED. My husband wants him to at least see Purdue and University of Illinois (our alma maters) but I think he would flounder at either of these places.

 

If his stats do come up, he sounds like an ideal student for the U of Chicago. My son has been getting e-mails and snail mail from them, and while it's not the school for him (he's just getting them based on his scores), when I've looked through the material it seems to describe your son to a T (except perhaps for not wanting big city). Just a thought. I'm not that familiar with others on your list.