Suzanne in ABQ Posted April 18, 2010 Share Posted April 18, 2010 Click here to read a very good article about the realities of adopting kids from orphanages or foster care. Read this if you're tempted to judge that TN mom who sent her adoptive son back to Russia, or if you think that love and kindness is all that's needed to help orphans become loving family members. (Thanks, Lisa in Jax, for the link.) http://www.nytimes.com/2010/04/18/fashion/18Adopt.html?emc=eta1_&pagewanted=all Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harriet Vane Posted April 18, 2010 Share Posted April 18, 2010 Good article. Thanks for sharing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
michelle l Posted April 18, 2010 Share Posted April 18, 2010 Thanks for sharing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LibraryLover Posted April 18, 2010 Share Posted April 18, 2010 “I wish I could take what I have now and give it to myself when I was little.†omg Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted April 18, 2010 Share Posted April 18, 2010 Good article. I've cried with my good friend who has two boys, both from the former Soviet Union, both with RAD, one more severe than the other. They've considered a disruption to the adoption of the older one because of fear for their life. They are trying everything but that but it is always there as a possibility because of fear for their own lives. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Haiku Posted April 18, 2010 Share Posted April 18, 2010 Good article. I don't think that people who haven't parented post-institutionalized children or been very close to a family that has can really understand what it's like. The standard parenting "rules," or what-have-you, don't apply. Tara Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jennifer in MI Posted April 18, 2010 Share Posted April 18, 2010 Great article. Thank you. My sister babysits for a family who was fostering three sisters with the hopes of adoption. The oldest was SO violent. She sounded like the child in the article. They tried to make it work for three years. Finally, they made the difficult decision to keep the younger two. The third was institutionalized, unfortunately. But, they feared for their lives daily. I cannot imagine that stress. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Suzanne in ABQ Posted April 18, 2010 Author Share Posted April 18, 2010 “I wish I could take what I have now and give it to myself when I was little.†omg I know! Isn't that precious, and tragic, and wonderful, all at the same time! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Danestress Posted April 18, 2010 Share Posted April 18, 2010 The standard parenting "rules," or what-have-you, don't apply. Tara I agree that you have to have been there to really understand what it's like. But I have a hard time accepting that no one is allowed to judge this woman's actions. Don't you think one can refrain from judging the decision to disrupt but still say that the *way* she did it was not the best? I find her actions deeply disturbing even though I absolutely understand that sometimes disruption is the best of the available choices. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jenn1129 Posted April 19, 2010 Share Posted April 19, 2010 great article. however, there is no excuse for sending the child back the way she did. in fact, it was disgusting and she should be charged with abandonment. i'm not judging her for not keeping the child...only for the way she went about it. I know firsthand how hard it is. I have two that are adopted. We went through 2 years of counseling with one who had Reactive Attachment Disorder(one of many problems). Did I want to run away at times? You betcha. Luckily, the counseling helped us all and I am grateful thaat my family is intact. Disruption is valid and needed for some. I get that. But do it legally and with love. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
clarkacademy Posted April 19, 2010 Share Posted April 19, 2010 That is all so sad Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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