A vacation for one

[AuntieM]

I'd love to hear from those of you who have done this. I feel a desperate need for some get alone with God time and I am seriously considering taking off next week. But it will come at a cost. I just wondered if those of you who have done it considered it worthwhile after the fact. I don't really want to deal with the guilt of wasting time and money if it turns out to be just so-so. What do you think?

[MeanestMomInMidwest]

I have never had a completely solo vacation, but have had a spa getaway with one close friend. We were both on the same page about soaking up the sun, little to no television, relaxed pace, etc. I came home refreshed and felt the money was well spent.

 

I also have had my dh take the children away for a full day and overnight (to his mother's). This gave me time to clean the house, then read, relax, nap. I went to a bookstore, then out to a solo lunch and a walk. It was lovely. Just when I started getting lonesome for my family, they came back. That may be an alternative if money is tight.

 

My SIL has gone away by herself to the convent her aunt used to be part of. The cost was minimal, as were the accommodations (single bed in a small room, but lovely meals prepared by the nuns). She enjoyed the solitude and the constant atmosphere of prayer. It was not too expensive. Even though I'm not religious, I have considered doing it for the solitude and the atmosphere. Every time I've visited, the nuns have been delightful and the setting peaceful.

[AuntieM]

Thanks, mominthemidwest. Anyone else?

[elegantlion]

I've never done a vacation alone (okay, not in 20 years), but I've been left alone in the house for several days (joy!), had to travel by myself (had time to recharge), had weekends with the girls, and I'm close to asking dh for another weekend by myself.

 

I'm an introvert and since I spend so much time at home it's hard to disconnect from all of that and recharge while I'm looking around at all the things to do. I need ME time.

 

I think getting away to spend time in contemplation is valuable. I always come home with better focus and energy to engage my family. In general I think men and women need time away and we (general we) don't do it enough. There is value in taking care of ourselves and sometimes that requires stepping back from all responsibility for a short period of time.

 

Go for it and do it guilt free.

[WTMCassandra]

I have taken individual spiritual retreats for years. They are my #1 way to recharge. I like to take one every three months or so, but sometimes it's less often. Catholics have done better with this spiritual discipline than Protestants : ). And I'm a Protestant so I can say that! Protestants seem to think we can only retreat in groups LOL.

 

This can be tricky to do economically. Catholic retreat centers are usually my first choice (except that I moved to an area where there aren't any nearby, sigh). They usually have reasonable rates and access to kitchen facilities so you can eat inexpensively. Hotels are possible but expensive, of course. Sometimes I have "housesit" for friends who were out of town. Recently, we bought an RV, and one of the reasons was to provide a retreat center for me. I even took a retreat in our driveway right after we bought it! (That was part testing out the RV and part retreat, actually.)

 

There are books and websites out there that can provide guidance on personal retreats. My most profitable ones have been where I set personal spiritual goals, like reading the whole book of Isaiah, for example. I have also taken homeschool planning retreats (actually, I need to do another one of those!).

 

I would be glad to talk via PM if you would like to chat about this more. I am a huge fan of spiritual retreats, especially for introverts who are homeschooling mothers!

[Lara in Colo]

Before I had children, and a husband who works all the time and cannot watch them for more than one day at a time, I would go camping alone. I loved it. I read books, I took my dog-we took walks. I cooked for one (I did not share or feel guilty about having steak AND shrimp AND choc cake. I camped where I wanted (not near fishing streams or where DH went as a child). I slept late, I didn't do dishes IMMEDIATLY. I rested, I prayed. I was selfish and quiet and indulgent. Gosh I wish I could do this again. I am soooooooo jealous, esp if you can go someplace with a pool!!!

 

Lara

[Rosie_0801]

I used to do that all of the time! Sometimes all I could afford was a one day holiday, so I jumped in the car when I woke up and drove interstate, then drove back again. Sometimes it's very nice to be on the open road, just watching the countryside pass. Plus, when you are by yourself, you can pull over to look at anything you like. Nice things like cute bookshops, not rusty car museums and playgrounds :D

 

Rosie

[Melinda in VT]

I haven't done a completely solo vacation. Nor have I done a spiritual retreat (although I've considered it often enough that I'm sure the time will come).

 

But I go on a trip without my husband and kids about once a year. Some years I travel with a friend. This year I'm going with my mom and sister. Other years I go to visit a friend or relative. (We live far from our family.)

 

I always come back with a renewed desire to be a better parent and some new ideas to try. I highly recommend it.

[Heather in the Kootenays]

I've gone to religious retreat centres several times and it was well worth it. Dh used the time to visit his mother with the kids.

[Beach Mom]

I have taken such a trip every couple years since being married, and am considering going again in a few weeks. For me it is precious time to think, pray, rest and regroup. It is time that is good for me; the kids and DH always have fun while I am gone, and I always come home renewed, refreshed and refocused.

 

I am fortunate that I can escape to the family beach house for the cost of gas and food and I find the ocean the best place for R&R, especially off season. Over the years, though, I have traveled other places for a respite. My DH recognizes my need to just be alone and I am so grateful for that support.

 

I have also tried retreats with other women but I never get as much out of them as I do time alone with God.

 

I highly recommend the experience.

[AuntieM]

... I find the ocean the best place for R&R ...

 

This is also my place to feel close to God; thus the dilemma, it's a long drive from where I am now. But after being raised on the coast and spending the last 5 years completely landlocked, I am about to crawl out of my skin.

 

Thanks for the encouragement, everyone, I think I am going to book a place in the morning. I am also going to call an old friend who lives n my destination town and ask if she can spend some time with me. She is an older, wiser Christian woman that I would like to ask to serve as a mentor.

[WTMCassandra]

Thanks for the encouragement, everyone, I think I am going to book a place in the morning. I am also going to call an old friend who lives n my destination town and ask if she can spend some time with me. She is an older, wiser Christian woman that I would like to ask to serve as a mentor.

 

:hurray::hurray::hurray:

:thumbup::thumbup::thumbup:

[Beach Mom]

This is also my place to feel close to God; ...last 5 years completely landlocked, I am about to crawl out of my skin.

 

I think I am going to book a place in the morning.

 

:hurray: Good for you. I will pray that your time away is meaningful and uplifting for you. May the rolling waves remind you of God's faithfulness and your friend provide you support and encouragement in your walk.

[LibraryLover]

Yoga, kayaking, and hiking are wonderful for this. You are not totally alone and there is activity that matters to you.

 

I don't know what a solo Christian retreat might be, exactly, but I would think monastaries for meditative and solitude purposes are not uncommon.

[AuntieM]

Okay, I am definitely taking the plunge. Lodging reserved, vehicle oil changed. A week at the beach all by myself. My heart is pounding at the thought.

 

 

If you think of me, say a little prayer for safe travel on Saturday. I will be going several hundred miles and anticipate a very full day's drive.

[MeanestMomInMidwest]

Okay, I am definitely taking the plunge. Lodging reserved, vehicle oil changed. A week at the beach all by myself. My heart is pounding at the thought.

 

 

If you think of me, say a little prayer for safe travel on Saturday. I will be going several hundred miles and anticipate a very full day's drive.

 

you'll have to let us know how it went. good luck to you.