4.5 year old and letter recognition -

[Guest janainaz]

I need a reality check here.

 

My first son was reading by the time he was 5. I do not expect my second child to necessarily follow in his footsteps. He is completely different in every way.

 

HOWEVER, we have been working on the letter "Aa" for over a year. I have kept it simple and he STILL can't tell me what it's called. We do Starfall, letter puzzles, plah-doh, you name it, we play it and I am getting really frustrated with him. Today, we have been practicing the letter E. We will do a few games, do Starfall and as soon as I point to the letter and ask him what it's called, he will say, "it's an A".

 

I know he's only 4.5, but it seems that the road with this child is going to be long and hard unless I find a way to handle his learning style. I ordered the Letter Factory DVD because of the rave reviews of it. I know just working with him every day is good enough, but the fact that we can spend 20 minutes on just one letter and do various fun things, and that he can't tell me what it's called makes me want to rip my hair out.

 

Please encourage me, give me tips for this type of child - suggestions, whatever, I just need to get a grip early on and maybe I should not be expecting him to recognize it so soon? I am clueless. I have read that MOST 4 and 5 year olds are ready to begin reading. I know not all are there maturity wise and I'm fine with him taking longer. But I need some tips.

 

Thanks for letting me rant!

[Year Round Mom]

Hi, I have only young kids myself, but I was thinking of my oldest, who is 5. He is super duper sensitive. He can sense the slightest change in my voice/mood and starts laughing or simply shuts down when I even think a frustrating thought. Is your second son sensitive? I find I have to approach DS by examining my mood first!!! It's emotionally taxing to be so vigilant about my inner, inner self, but so beneficial for our relationship and my mental health :D

[TracyR]

Every child is different. My oldest didn't grasp reading until the age of 9 no matter what method or program I used. My 2nd daughter learned to read at 4.5 and made life so simple Then there is my third daughter who is a mix between her two sisters. I've had to teach them in different ways. The Leap Pad videos were not out when my oldest began reading but they were with my 2nd daughter and she did well. My third daughter has learned them through Leap Pad and File Folder games and my 4th daughter is following in her footsteps.

 

Honestly it will come when he is ready and the Leap Pad videos are really a big help.

[Sue G in PA]

It's so difficult when your first child (or any of your other children) is easy isn't it? My first child learned to read early and kept on going. My second child wasn't so easy and the third even more difficult. Then comes #4 and he learned to read on his own w/out any help from me. Now there is #5 who is 6yo and barely knows his letters and sounds and refuses (and I mean refuses) to sit w/ me to learn to read. It doesn't help that his 3yo sister can already read. :glare: They are all so different and as parents it is so challenging to not compare or think that one should do what the other did just b/c they are "that age". Give him some time and lay off the "formal" teaching is my opinion. Watch Leapster Letter Factory. Play w/ the Fridge Phonics. My 6yo's favorite "letter game" is when we go out to jump on the trampoline together and I call out a letter or letter sound and he has to say what the letter sound or letter is that matches. If he gets it right we both jump wildly and then move on to another letter/sound. It's really fun. Your son is not even K age yet. Just have fun and don't worry just yet. They all develop at their own pace.

[Lisa in the UP of MI]

Everyone learns at their own pace and does things on their own time. I've gone through some stress trying to potty train my ds. He "seemed" ready for a long, long time but just wouldn't do it. I was really stressed about it. I'm sure that did not help the situation. I tried my best to relax about it and one day he just started going into the bathroom and doing it all by himself. So, I would try as hard as I could to not stress about it. He will learn his ABC's. Maybe not today or tomorrow, or maybe not even in a few months, but he will learn. Keep fun alphabet things around the house but let him choose. Letter puzzles, a movable alphabet (at least two sets for matching), and sandpaper letters have been a big hit here. Build-a-letter type things like HWT has (I actually just found a lower case set in the Learning Resources catalog!) would be good for independent practice. Keep out coloring pages and alphabet books. Put them in baskets or on shelves in an easy-to-access place along with other fun activities and give him free time. Let him watch fun shows, like The Letter Factory. Chances are that he will come to you asking or telling you about the letters before you know it.

[StephanieF]

I had the same problem with ds but with numbers. He couldn't recognise beyond 5. At 4.5 we'd been learning the letter 6 for several months and he still couldn't do it!

By 5.5yrs he was doing double digit addition.

He just wasn't ready and however many pasta letters we'd make he couldn't remember it!

I wouldn't be concerned for a few more months yet

Stephanie

[samba2nite]

The leap frog dvd did it for us in 30 days we played them every time we were in the car. We also used the tree house series

[5Youngs]

Hang in there and be careful with your expectations.

 

My oldest, struggled with reading until late 2nd grade.

He now reads college history texts at age 12, FOR FUN.

 

Second son, was reading great at the end of kinder.

Reads unabridged literature like it's going out of style, at age 10.

 

Youngest, started reading at age 4.5 and hasn't slowed a bit.

He freaked out at age 4, when he realized that he was the only one in our family who didn't know how to read.:D

 

Thank goodness that I struggled with the oldest, or I would have thought that it was going to be easy with my other two.

They are all different and develop at their own pace.

The second son; I had to teach him the multiplication facts 3 TIMES! We worked on them for a solid YEAR~:tongue_smilie:

 

Your son will get it.

Just be patient and stick with it~

You may have to try a different teaching method or curriculum.

All three of mine learned to read differently.

It's all part of the non-stop FUN of home schooling, right? :lol:

[stripe]

HOWEVER, we have been working on the letter "Aa" for over a year. I have kept it simple and he STILL can't tell me what it's called.

 

First, explain again what a letter is. Then, pick a different letter. Perhaps the first letter of his name?

 

I think maybe you just need to give him time?

[mktyler]

Echoing pp's, some kids really struggle with abstract information. However there are things you can do to move him along.

 

1. Daily practice, and even multiple times a day. But in very short increments 5-10 minutes.

 

2. Work on only a small group of letters, maybe 3-6, at a time. Don't move on till he is confident with these.

 

3. Work on sounds, NOT names. The goal is having him read, not alphabetize. This eliminates the overall amount of information he has to learn in the beginning stages. When he's reading small words well, you can add the names back in.

 

4. If he is amenable and capable, have him write the letters, saying the sound as he writes (traces, forms in sand tray, etc)

 

5. Have him start blending two sound units:

 

a m am

m a ma

 

Have him say the sounds then blend them together. Tell him the sounds if he can't remember. Have him track with his finger. While this won't directly address his memory, it's an important reading skill and will help you feel like he's moving forward.

 

6. Make up pages with the letters on them:

 

a a a a a

 

a a a a a

 

a a a a

 

Have him track with his finger, saying the sounds as he comes to each letter.

 

7. Play a game I call Honk!, adapted from Phonics Pathways. Make flashcards of the letters (several for each) you are working on. Also make a few cards with a funny picture or stickers on it. Turn them over quickly and you both say the correct sound. When the picture comes up you each do a silly action.

 

8. Play sound bingo, as described in Reading Reflex. Using only the letters you are currently working on, fill in a 5X5 grid. Use the flash cards to play, turning them over and saying the sound for the letter on the card. Have him trace over the letters in the boxes with a marker, saying the sound as he writes.

 

He's young, so you may just want to come back to it in a couple of months. If you don't feel comfortable doing that, try these suggestions and relax.

 

Best of luck!

 

Melissa

Minnesota

Reading Program Junkie

dd(11) dd(6) ds(5) ds(1)

[Guest janainaz]

Thanks everyone. Really. I just needed to be told to :chillpill:. As much as I know that, today it was not sinking in. I always tell myself that he's only 4, the "half" part doesn't even matter. There's no rush, he'll get it. I would tell another mother to relax, play, and just have fun. It'll come with time, but stressing out does not help.

[christielee7278]

I haven't read through other's responses so forgive me if I'm repeating.

 

My 4.5 year old was the same at the end of 2008. He would get frustrated with me and just say he wanted to READ, not learn how to read. lol I finally gave up and bought those Leapfrog videos after it was suggested on here. We didn't do any other work for the first month or so... I just let him watch those videos when he wanted. We started back very slowly with Phonics Pathways, some simple flash cards, and just playing letter games. Now he is reading and spelling cvc words with no problem!! He loves learning to read now. I KNOW it was the LF videos that truly helped him!!!

 

My almost 3 yr old also watched those videos with my 4.5 year old when he was interested and can name almost all of the alphabet himself!! I LOVE Leapfrog! :D

[Brindee]

Thanks everyone. Really. I just needed to be told to :chillpill:. As much as I know that, today it was not sinking in. I always tell myself that he's only 4, the "half" part doesn't even matter. There's no rush, he'll get it. I would tell another mother to relax, play, and just have fun. It'll come with time, but stressing out does not help.

Okay, since that's what I would advise: :chillpill:, relax, play, and just have fun! There's no rush, he'll get it! :D

 

My oldest read early, and my youngest read early. My middle could care less about reading. He was 7 before it finally clicked with him, then he went to town! Before he was 8 he was tested by a friend of mine and was reading at a 7th grade level!

 

It USED to be that kids rarely even learned to read! I know it's needed this day and age, but really, it's NOT needed by age 4! Let him have fun! I'm sure it'll click, and he'll probably not be able to get enough of it---IF you allow him his space so he doesn't start hating it! :grouphug:

[NancyNellen]

You know, my 4th child was like this when we started. He just couldn't remember the letter names. So I just went on and started Phonics Pathways with him. He could read CVC words well, but still couldn't remember letter names! He now has it all down, but he was definitely faster w/ sounds than names. Perhaps you could just start him reading and the letter names will come?

[Ariston]

My son is almost 5 and I experienced the same frustrations this past year. What really made a difference for him was doing Handwriting Without Tears. For some reason learning how to draw each letter in a very orderly way really worked for him and now he really knows the shape of the letters he's learned. Before I think it all seemed kind of random to him--just a bunch of letters.

[ElizabethB]

Letter Factory!

 

You could do a bit of Starfall until then.

[lulubelle]

Hi, I just want to say that I'm going through this too. My son just turned 5 and he can't get number recognition beyond 4. And, is getting his letters very slowly! I keep wondering if he has some sort of visual recall problem. But, he's doing great and progressing in so many areas - I too need to chill. I just requested Leap frog, ABC Dr. Seuss, and Millies math house from the library! Why is it weird and hard to teach the letters without saying the name of the letter. I'm having a hard time not doing that!

[Brindee]

Hi, I just want to say that I'm going through this too. My son just turned 5 and he can't get number recognition beyond 4. And, is getting his letters very slowly! I keep wondering if he has some sort of visual recall problem. But, he's doing great and progressing in so many areas - I too need to chill. I just requested Leap frog, ABC Dr. Seuss, and Millies math house from the library! Why is it weird and hard to teach the letters without saying the name of the letter. I'm having a hard time not doing that!

Remember that especially boys often don't have everything connected in their brains yet by this age. Once everything connects, they can move forward without so much frustration for them or you! That's why it's good to wait awhile 'til they're really ready.

[OrganicAnn]

My DD 5 knows all her letters but will out of the blue forget what one letter is. Like she'll know "R" for the last year and then one day she can't remember what it is. Then suddenly she remember again. Same with numbers.

 

I've heard that kids have more difficulty distinguishing letters with straight lines and that letters with curves are easier to remember. So 'S', 'C', 'B' etc are easier than 'A', 'I', 'T', 'N' etc. So you might focus on the curved letters first and see if you make progress.

[Julie in Monterey]

I always, always recommend this book, I simply can't help it.... Games For Reading by Peggy Kaye. It's inexpensive and full of fun hands on activities to help with phonemic awareness, letter recognition and eventually reading. My 3rd grader is tutoring a 4 y/o with activities out of it and they are both having a blast. The idea here is to keep it light and fun and not to have mom stress out.

 

I'm not a huge computer fan so I would ditch Starfall (just me). Games for reading is full of common sense (after you read them you think, I could of thought of that!) ideas. I would also start with phonemic awareness, things like rhyming games and singing chants. You could do Purple Penguins Pick Pineapples sentences (as stated in Mrs. Kaye's book). You pick a letter, briefly teach that sound and then make up silly sentences or phrases that only start with that sound. We still have loads of fun with this and I have two full fledged readers. And/or you could play, I'm Going on a Picnic and packing things that start with the sound s. EAch person ads a new item that starts with that letter sound and the word the previous person gets. This not only works on phonemic awareness but on memory, turn taking and listening. Many of these things can be done while in the car. It won't even seem like school.

 

In addition to training the ear, some visual activities could be benefical as well. I love to include puzzles, mazes and mirror drawing into learning to read. I see it as a nice compliment. When you think about, learning to read is an amazing accomplishment.

 

Another fun idea is using a big posterboard (or half) for whatever sound/letter your child wants to focus on. Trace is big and bubbly and let your child decorate the inside of that letter either with paint, markers, etc. Then either help them find in a magazine or draw items that start with that sound. Kids tend to take ownership of their masterpiece. They then have a visual reminder of words that start with that sound.

 

I've gone on and on. All of these ideas come out of this great resource. It's the book I recommend to all my friends who want to work on reading or get their child prepared to read. By the way, activities go up until about 3rd grade.

 

Good luck, enjoy that munchkin and have fun!

 

Julie in Monterey