:iagree: I agree with Chris. This precious soul is being sent your way for a purpose and you have the opportunity to demonstrate the love of God to her. You have no idea how powerful that message is, in fact it may be years before you find out how much of an influence you are being right now. Do remember the power of prayer, stand firm on those non-negotiable standards in your home and keep loving her no matter how ugly the teen years get. I'd only add that being the step parent, it is really best to remain quiet and demonstrate the message of Christ in your behavior rather than share a lot of opinions. I learned this valuable lesson the hard way with my two older step sons. I'd give anything to be able to go back and have some do-overs! :iagree: Well spoken, great wisdom. :iagree: Again, this is real wisdom, and from someone's true life experience. One thing I've learned to be true as well is not to judge the full situation based only on what is heard and seen. Things are NOT always as they appear. Where she may act out in ways that are upsetting, frustrating, offensive, maddening, etc. inside she may be just longing to be set straight, waiting for final proof that what you are saying is the truth and that you do love and care for her. I learned that when my dss was yelling at me, he was really angry with himself more than me. My pastor helped me see that, and I was able to get through the situation with much more confidence. I was the target because I was the messenger. Again, as the stepmother, you have to be careful where to tread. But do hold on to hope and faith and keep praying, oh keep on praying! Blessings, Lucinda

that caused dh and I to pull our little girl out of ps. She had just finished 2nd grade, and we thought it over during the summer. This was a decision we made together, although originally I was the one pushing for it. I think the cincher for dh was talking to another couple that hs's and hearing directly from the dad about how he was unsure at first, but would not turn back for anything. One reason was that we had raised older children (we are a remarried couple), and it was very obvious to us that the ps system had deteriorated substantially over a period of years. A great deal of this is cultural, because dh and I believe that there is a huge moral decline in our nation. It is so obvious at school, as the culture is so much a part of what happens there. Another reason was that our dd is a very social person who got pulled into the hub-bub of chatty girls and their daily dramas. Even in second grade her focus was more on social things than on education, and we were very concerned about it. We did want her to have a social life, but providing the best education possible was the top priority. After doing our research, we realized that both were possible through hs'ing. For us, the biggest reason for pulling our dd out of ps was that we wanted her to have a complete education that included our Christian faith. We had a strong desire to weave this into the curriculum, presenting history (for instance) with factual information on how people of faith were led to do certain things, study and discover certain things, stand on their faith during courageous times, etc. We wanted to be able to pray during study time if we chose to, combine our faith with science lessons...study the Bible with reading and history, and on and on. (Our dd LOVES this by the way...) We couldn't come close to anything like this by merely supplementing our faith along side a secular education. We know that many people do this successfully, but for our dd and our family situation at this time, we felt that we had to take the big plunge and do hs'ing. At some point we may opt to send dd to the private Classical Christian school where I teach part-time, but we are not ready for that yet. We are enjoying hs'ing tremendously! But getting back to why we made the decision in the first place -- I had read about hs'ing and had been considering it already when the final straw occurred during the spring of dd's last year of ps experience. The little hub-bub of girls had been struggling to get along and so a parent volunteer, the principal and the 2nd grade teacher had agreed to get them involved in a special class. The parent was a yoga expert and was working with the girls on ways to relax and deal with conflict. All of this happened without our knowledge or consent -- we found out about it afterward. For one, we did not know that the girls' conflict had reached a point of needing special intervention, and we were not informed that our dd would be taught yoga and other spiritual principles in school. To make a long story short, I challenged the school on this situation, stating that as a parent I was very troubled by the fact that they could handle conflict resolution with my child in this way without my permission. I brought up the fact that I would obviously not be allowed to volunteer my time to pull these girls aside and teach them Biblical principles on dealing with conflict, so why was it okay for a parent to introduce yoga and eastern mysticism to them? It was through this situation that I learned more about the fact that ps has assumed the right to make decisions for all students that supersede the rights of parents. (Don't get me started on that one now, or I'll start ranting.) All in all, I believe that ps cannot meet the needs of every child and every family. In our society we need to have options in educating our children. Hs'ing isn't for everyone, but for those that choose it, it is an amazing and rich lifestyle. After my dd made the adjustment to being educated at home, she loved it. Our family will never regret taking this journey. Blessings, Lucinda

:iagree: Well said, swimmermom. Blessings, Lucinda

:iagree: I agree with all my heart. My husband and I are also very strict about language use, so when this was a RA the words were edited. The moral lessons taught in the story FAR outweighed the need to edit some sentences. Blessings, Lucinda

:lurk5:

I agree with everything that's already been said. I'd only add two things: I don't get any of the books from the library due to the fact that we have limited library resources in our rural area. I instead choose to buy as many of the books in advance as I can, usually from used books sources or from BookMooch or PaperbackSwap. Any books I end up not having, I buy just before the beginning of each unit. When the year is done, the books that we want to keep for our family library will stay here, but any others will be sold as used books to recoup some of the money we've spent. This way, I only have to purchase the resource books four times per year. I can manage this reasonably. The other thing I wanted to say is that I only have one child at home and we are using TOG. We LOVE it and feel it is worth every dime we've spent. As long as we are hs'ing, we will stay with TOG. Blessings, Lucinda

Ooooh, I hear you Kalah! We haven't had six weeks off, but Dh is still laid off and that all in itself makes it hard to focus on school and return to that all important routine. My hat is off to you though, it sounds like you have a lot going and it will be challenging. Best to you as you persevere! Blessings, Lucinda

Despite my previous post, my plan is start light this week with the three R's mostly. We are going to add some housecleaning afternoons into the week just to help us get back on track. I feel like you, Karen. The house needs to be de-cluttered before I can fully jump back into school. Blessings, Lucinda

I am so not ready! My body is stuck in winter hibernation mode...I am hoping that the talk I'm about to have with myself will give me the kick start that I need. Am I up yet? :001_smile: Lucinda

I said 'other' because we only go once in a blue moon -- which means we might go once a year, or it could be every other year... If there were great movies out there to see AND we had the money to go, I might go more often. It all depends. Blessings, Lucinda

I gave my daughter a full fledged tea party for her 8th birthday. We used china and had fresh flowers on the table, finger sandwiches, scones and the whole nine yards. Girls were required to wear dresses (hats and gloves optional). They all LOVED it! The girls played dress up, musical chairs, and some other parlor style games. I don't think we had a craft, but one that would go with this more victorian style tea party would be to string beads for necklaces or make little nosegay bouquets. Blessings, Lucinda

:grouphug: I'm so sorry to hear of your loss, and will be praying for you and your family. Blessings, Lucinda

There are some great ones out there, but my very favorite guided Bible study was Experiencing God by Henry Blackaby. This study changed my life and brought me into a close relationship with God. I have done it personally twice (in partnership with a friend the first time), and I have also taught it to groups twice. Other than this, I bought an Inductive Bible from the Precept website, and have enjoyed going through, book by book, while following the guidelines suggested at the beginning of each one. Sometimes I also use commentary along with it, depending on what books I am studying. (i.e. Right now I'm studying Psalms and I often refer to Spurgeon's Treasury of David if I need more insight.) I hope this helps. "Those who know your name will trust in you, for you, LORD, have never forsaken those who seek you." Blessings, Lucinda

Did you get fitted first and have a particular style/manufacturer in mind before ordering? Blessings, Lucinda

Yes, hilarious...and I think God is smiling with us. He has a sense of humor too. Blessings, Lucinda

Double-check.....

Thank you for the tip, but my poor body is within the size range offered in stores. Full figured, yes, but not outrageously so. I have a small frame with skinny limbs and an apple in the middle :lol: Or should I say an apple and two large oranges? (hypothetically speaking of course - LOL!). Blessings, L.

Thanks Jean. I am going to check both of these out in January when the sales are going. Blessings, Lucinda

Blessings, Lucinda

Excellent idea! Thank you, tex-mex. January is always a good month for sales on clothing, so I'll keep my radar up. Blessings, Lucinda

It breaks my heart as well, and it hits pretty close to home. My oldest son just got sworn in a couple of months ago and is serving in a small town, metro area agency. His dad (my former dh) was a policeman until he was retired with a disability, and so I was prepared for the possibility that one of our three sons would want to take that path as well. Every time I read about shootings, my heart skips a beat! Yet in my heart I know that we need good police officers, and my son is a true warrior and a caring soul. The town he works for is so blessed to have him there to protect and serve. God bless the men and women who serve their communities and put their lives on the line! They are someone's sons, daughters, brothers, daddies and mommies, friends and neighbors. Blessings, Lucinda

If you were (er, hypothetically speaking...) a full-figured woman that wanted to find a posture style bra that was of good quality, a good fit and a reasonable price, where would you shop? My back is killing me, and my cup runneth over. Blessings, Lucinda

How about custards for the whole family? Blessings, Lucinda

I have really been enjoying reading this thread, thinking all along that we in the U.S. can't act all that smug about other people eating pig's head. After all, we eat the other end of the pig and that's probably even worse if you think about it. :tongue_smilie: Once I got to #52 on the thread I saw that someone else was thinking of the other end as well. LOL! All I can say is that my hat's off to you, Jean. You are one amazing wife! Blessings, Lucinda

Someone from Nebraska sent me a package of some wonderful books that my dd would love for Christmas, and I have a feeling it was someone from the Hive. Whoever you may be, I just want to say thank you. The books were a great hit! Blessings, Lucinda