Depending on ages: Have you tried the whole, "Since no one can get their chores done properly alone, all of us are going to work together until all the chores are done correctly thing?" It's more fun, but takes 3 times as long. And then the kids who do get their chores done right can do them alone, and they get extra screen time, or whatever your family's reward is. When they see it's not "Mom's making me do chores she should do herself," but "this stuff has to be done, we can do it together OR I can do it myself and get to the fun stuff." Heck, I'm in my 30's, and I still find washing dishes much more pleasurable when DH is helping than when I'm stuck in a kitchen alone. The other option, the military option, is that when you know someone knows how to do something correctly and isn't doing it, to point it out and to punish them, with extra chores or whatever consequence is most dire to that child. I might reserve that for teenagers. Have you had their vision checked? I remember once a friend was complaining about her daughter's apparent inability to sweep a floor, but then she realized the poor kid would have qualified as legally blind without glasses. Daughter got glasses, floors and everything she touches are MUCH neater.

I'm talking about all of these situations.

I had many, many similar experiences, starting at age 9 when I went to a baseball game with my parents. I went alone (but in their sight) to get something like a box of crackerjacks and got propositioned by an old drunk guy on the way back. This is exactly what I'm concerned about. In my case, in the most dangerous situation I was riding my bike to my grandparents house in a very nice neighborhood, my mom was a few blocks behind me in the car, with smaller kids who might not bike that far well. A car started circling me. Luckily, a cop drove by, I waved, and the circler left. A week later the same guy (or at least same description, same car) tried to kidnap two 6th graders from a middle school. The person was never caught. Several years later a little girl was killed, and it turned out she had been attacked, and her convicted killer looked exactly like the guy. I can never be certain it was the same person, but my instinct says it was. Except for the guy circling my bike with his car, and a few other creepy things that happened as an adult, that inspired me to call the cops, I never told anyone anything. I just didn't know what to do with that information. I don't want that for my DC.

Thanks, I had never heard of that book before. My library has it on the shelf, I'm going to get it today.

Well my real answer is that you should listen to your own instinct and that no one knows your kid as well as you. But if it were my DC, I think I would treat this like any other embarrassing situation, and make her go back because if you cave to anxiety, anxiety might take over her life. She has to see that while she is important, anxious feelings are not. After a class or two someone else will do something stupid, and they'll forget all about it. Also, what does she think friends are? Someone you're friendly to and work hard to impress? Or someone who genuinely likes you, and supports you even when you're going through something hard? I'd be more worried about that, and her getting the habit of letting social anxiety take over her life than I would anything else. There are books for little kids about anxiety. I saw one the other day that was called something like "Is Your Worry Too Big?" You might find some books like that for her that will give her ways to deal with anxiety. DH would just say she has to go, it's her gym credit. He's as insistent about the importance of martial arts as I am about swimming. Non-negotiable.

:iagree: Also, people can respond differently to real foods than they do to glucose solution. Sometimes people find that combining high fat foods with carbs makes their sugar more reactive, not worse. Most people are the opposite, but... I just think a food journal is a more accurate representation of your life.

Cook and chill all of them and toss with mayonnaise for cold pasta salad?

Fat free, sugar free instant pudding (especially a mix of one box each chocolate and coconut). Fruit (with a tsp of a syrup - raspberry or chocolate drizzled over the fruit and the plate). Mango is especially good for this. Pears or fruit cocktail (canned, sugar free) in sugar free jello. Pumpkin Mousse: A can of pumpkin, pumpkin pie spice, and a container of fat free cool whip. Mix. Sweeten if necessary. Make a really rich flourless chocolate cake with bittersweet chocolate. Reduce the sugar a little and serve tiny portions. Can you tell I grew up in a household where my mom was constantly on weight watchers? Honestly though, I wouldn't worry too much. He's probably about to have a growth spurt. I'd focus more on limiting snacking and drinks with calories (milk or water are fine) and increasing the fiber in foods if I was concerned.

We're academically orientated, and will encourage our DC to get STEM or Accounting degrees. If they insist on something fluffy that is EASY to learn in real life, they'll have to talk us into it, and probably double major in STEM or something like education so at least they have jobs to fall back on. We want to prepare our DC for practical life. We think undergraduate humanities are overrated. Also, we're following a great books sort of program already, so they should be better educated by the time they leave us than most college graduates are already. This might change a little if they opt (and can get into) for a school like Harvard or Reed, well known for intellectual kids who are capable of any job. And I don't necessarily feel that other fields are without merit - if money were no object, I'd go back to school and study theology, just for the pure joy of learning. I just don't think luxuries are something we have the duty to finance.

I'm a little more concerned about how you feel after having eaten a lot of sugar. You could probably go to a pharmacy or something like Walmart right now and get a free blood sugar monitor to test. Though I'd recommend actually spending a little more money and buying one that has CHEAP test strips. Then, when you feel strange, test your blood sugar. Sometimes, when people feel shaky and weak their sugar is actually normal, it's just falling quickly and they're having a hard time transitioning to burning fat. If that's the case, and you're not diabetic, the way to fix that is to exercise. Long, slow exercise. Work your way up to walking 3 hours a day and within 2 weeks of doing so you'll be a lot better. Any amount of exercise will help, though.

Probably 3 weeks until I slept better, 6 weeks until I felt a little better, and... I didn't feel back to normal until I quit the thyroid medicine and took iodine supplements (50 mg Iodoral that I order from someone on Amazon). I can feel the difference with iodine in less than an hour. However, you really need to explore some things before trying that - because if your low thyroid isn't the result of not eating enough iodine and having too much exposure to things like bleach, but is instead an autoimmune issue, or if you have an iodine allergy, supplementing could make you a lot worse, not better. Upping the dose of thyroid meds hadn't been working for me, I knew I had a negative ANA (autoimmune) test, and figured out I wasn't eating enough iodine, and decided to go ahead and risk it. After 90 days I felt better than ever, took another thyroid test and had a perfectly normal result! And my hair grew in thick and dark and shiny.

I was like this too... Yeah, I didn't have the slightest idea how to deal with it either, and at the time my parents were so overwhelmed with other issues that I never brought things to them. Martial arts does seem like a good idea. Sounds like you're teaching very good boundaries. :001_smile: I think you're right, and especially in cities, a certain percentage of disgusting perverts are more open about it. This is a good idea. Thanks everyone!

I think you must have led a much more sheltered life than I have.

hahahahaha :lol: I wonder why I never thought of that.

On the topic of 12 year olds in modest dresses who just look a little *too* good, or too old... How do you teach your daughters defense mechanisms when it comes to men? My parents were really good at a lot of things, but this particular topic wasn't one of them. Athol Kay's Blog (Mostly about married teA, NOT SAFE FOR WORK) had this thread a couple of weeks ago about Child Beauty Pageants and at the end sort of got into teaching pretty girls to be rude to men who made advances to them. The idea of teaching boundaries is one thing, but teaching girls to be rude seems.... wrong??? idk. Please tell me what your thoughts are on this?

It's modest. She's just beautiful. I'd let her wear it because she's going with her dad. The point is for her to have a cinderella moment, right? I've been struggling a lot with this idea myself though. I read something about it on the MMSL blog a few weeks ago - at the end of this long thread on child beauty pageants he said you should teach very pretty girls to be rude to men who hit on them as a defense mechanism... Here's the link, if you want to read it or start a spinoff thread: http://marriedmansexlife.com/2012/07/child-beauty-pageants-poise-or-posion/ I'm curious what everyone thinks about that?

More menu planners I found on Pinterest (since the first has already been posted): http://momsbyheart.net/create-your-own-menu-planning-board/ http://www.thehomesihavemade.com/2012/02/magnetic-menu-board-part-1.html http://www.bhg.com/decorating/storage/organization-basics/free-printable-storage-labels/#page=9

No. I keep meaning to, but I'm an abysmal failure at this. I've gone so far as to write down all our favorite recipes, but then when I get to the store I just buy whatever looks good and cook around the things that we have in the kitchen. There's a gorgeous system on pinterest with magnets and color coding... my hyper-organized dream self drools over it...

The short version is to get a dog book called Smarter Than You Think. The somewhat longer version is to keep the dog on a leash by your side or in his crate at all times when not outside for the next 3 weeks. When your husband is home, have him hold the leash. It's called tether training.

That could be. I've seen a few online lists that says it's okay, but I saw a package of it at the store that said it contained wheat, so maybe it was just that brand.

Yeah, it kind of does sound like you're afraid of her. The thing is, spanking is NOT hitting. It is punishment because you're the adult, you love her, and you cannot allow her to grow up being spoiled rotten because you love her too much. That's why you can't spank when you're angry. It's a consequence, not a moral judgment or expression of anger. We don't behave with screaming fits, and until she learns that, she can take the consequences. These are the consequences. If she hits she needs a time out until you've calmed down about that, and then she needs consequences for that. It's going to take probably 3 days of WORSE behavior until she believes that suddenly you've developed a backbone, and if you wish wash, even longer.

Don't feel bad about it being a power play. It IS a power play. She's started this power play with you because she thinks you'll cave and she has more power. She's a child, not a tiny adult. She cannot reason in the same way you can. She may have knowledge but she does not have reason. She cannot survive without you. You are the parent, you are the one in charge, if she's testing the power boundaries YOU MUST WIN. I'm not saying this in an abusive way or any sort of lack of love at all... you simply must win. When she grows up she can be in charge, until then you are. Don't apologize for that or she will be in control of your house until you kick her out. Kids need to learn boundaries, she's just testing the limits of hers. If you let her get away with screaming crying fits, and then you don't have her in school so she won't suffer the social ostracism that would normally accompany very bad behavior, she's not going to learn boundaries with anyone. She can't have the power here. She's a child.

Uhhhhmmm, this might not be so popular here, but for screaming, crying fits where I was certain there wasn't a medical issue, I'd spank her. If there was ANY hint there might be a medical issue I'd address that first, but it doesn't seem like it from what you've said here. At the very least remove her audience during tantrums, and give consequences for the tantrums too. That sort of behavior is not acceptable. The next tantrum, after you've both calmed down, warn her if it happens again she will get a spanking. Explain more acceptable ways to get her feelings out, if you think she needs one. And I wouldn't spank her during the fit, either. I would make her wait until both of us had calmed down, then I would give a brief, one-sentence lecture, such as throwing fits are not allowed, you warned her about this before, and the consequences are a spanking, and then I'd spank her. With a bare hand on the bottom only, and only when you're calm. Maybe one spank for as many minutes as she screamed. I'd stick with that for maybe two months. She's getting on the upper range of when I think spanking is okay, but given that she's acting like a toddler, a toddler like punishment is what I'd go with. By the time kids are old enough to reason I don't like to spank, but you can't reason with tantrums.

I've made the recipe here: http://howaboutorange.blogspot.com/2010/04/how-to-make-your-own-deodorant.html I didn't have arrowroot powder, but it's just starch, so I used cornstarch instead. I added 8 drops clary sage, 8 drops lavender, and 2 drops each bergamot, jasmine, & lemongrass oils to make this smell a lot like the baby powder scent I usually buy. I suppose you could just use scented baby powder if you didn't have a bunch of essential oils on hand. You should NOT use lavender on boys anyway, as it's an estrogen and can make them develop breasts. Just because something is natural doesn't mean it's safe. I emptied out 2 old containers I don't like but hadn't gotten around to going through the drawer to toss them yet. One batch completely filled the larger container. It worked better than any commercial deodorant I've tried, but I stopped using it after a while because I started getting a red, slightly itchy rash. I didn't have it tested, but from my nursing days it was starting to look like a yeast infection in my underarms. I started wiping my underarms with vinegar and switched back to a commercial antipersperant.

If you need cash, auction it. But probably the best deal (assuming your income is still high) would be to donate it somewhere and use as a tax write off. My guess is even if you auctioned it it would sell for something like $10K or less.