I agree with all of this. I would defnitely look into the NPCs at the reachy reach schools if that is what she thinks she wants to do. Before you make any decisions, you need to know if you can afford those reachy reach schools. Yes, they are more generous than others with need-based finanacial aid, but you still may not get any or enough. If big merit is something you are going to be after, NM can certainly provide that, so I would absolutely make sure I knew which year was going to "count," and I would call the NMSC and talk to them about various scenarios. Ds has a friend who took the PSAT during his true junior year and scored remarkably well. He THEN decided to go abroad the next year, but did not treat that as his senior year. He is back now doing his senior year of high school. They had considered treating the year abroad as his senior year (and having him do the English credit online, etc.), but the college application process was going to be too challenging during the time he was abroad. Just like what 8's dd's friend found to be true. Basically, ds's friend wound up taking a gap year *during* high school. I do think he definitely feels like he is spinning his wheels now that he is back. He is ready to move on. I can only hope he, his parents, and the school he attends took the proper steps to align that with NM requirements. I know it's possible, but it does require some hoop-jumping/notifications, etc. Now, the places that give lots of money for NM may not even be the types of places your dd would be interested in attending. It just depends on the kid. That needs to be considered as well. Regardless, I would clear up with NM the plan and what is needed to make it work so she does not lose that option. Ds had another friend who graduated and THEN took the gap year. Overall, I think this was by far the better experience compared to the first friend. Lastly, ds has a friend at Stanford (she's within our area, but we did not know them until they both were admitted and we found each other), who did a study abroad program in Russia the summer before her senior year of high school. I do not know which one it was, but it was funded and competitive and in a critical language. This, to me, was the BEST experience of the three. I honestly think that this really made her stand out in her application process. Her grades were good, and she had good leadership, but her test scores were low for Stanford. I think she had much interesting fodder for essays from her summer study abroad experience. Just speculation on my part. She will do a quarter (or perhaps two) abroad in college. Hang in there LuckyMama. Deep breaths. I know the angst comes from suddenly needing to figure out many things that you thought you had a year or so to think about. I hope the "meeting" goes well today.

oops - double post.

You know, there are places where you can mail off sentimental t-shirts and have them made into a quilt/throw. Ds's school did this with all the school t-shirts they have had through the years and raffled off the quilt.

What about clothes that are sentimental? Wedding gown, peignoir set from wedding night (yep, I still have this!) Christening gown, child's baby clothes? I am wrapping up clothes today, but I think these really should be under the sentimental category. What do you think?

We don't overdo Christmas now - just a tree, stockings, and a manger scene. However, we have a 12-foot tree, and enough to cover it. Until we really do down-size, it's not a problem, but I do plan to cull some ornaments (as well as a few odds and ends that we don't use) this year. Gosh, I shudder at the thought of having to remember how to calculate the surface area of a cone and compare surface areas between a 12- and 4-foot tree so I can determine what percentage of ornaments have to go when we do downsize to a much smaller place! Somehow, it doesn't seem like a 4-foot tree would be 1/3 the size of 12-foot tree in surface area, but it's been a looooong time since we did Geometry!

Congrats to the boardies' dc who are semi-finalists!

I have read through this entire thread. I don't come to the chat board much anymore - I really don't know why; there are always many helpful threads! Probably because it's too much fun to be here, and I would fritter away too much time! I went through my closet yesterday and got rid of four tall kitchen garbage bags of clothes. I didn't thank any items for their service, but there were definitely some where I said out loud to them, "You do not spark joy!" I tried many things on as I went, and if they no longer fit properly, out they went. I did fold my jeans (they had previously been hung), and they look so tidy in a drawer. I still need to go through my dresser and shoes. Which brings me to my question - does she suggest anything about storing shoes? I have ordered the book, but it won't arrive until tomorrow. Do you store your shoes in boxes or out? I have some shelves in my closet, but I can stack three boxes per shelf and that seems more efficient than just lining up a row of pairs on each shelf to me. I can get six pairs per shelf in boxes, but only three or four if out of boxes. I do think that her system of folding seems to work better in shallower drawers. Have you found that your folded items tend to be more wrinkled? That has always been my hesitancy about folding in general. That and it never occurred to me to not have stacks of things - her folding and "standing on edge" system is brilliant, IMO. We have previously gone through our books, though I do have two more areas in the house that need to be culled. We had soooo many to give away that it has been difficult to get them to the library to donate! Because they are so heavy, I only take around 30 at a time. Our library doesn't really have an easy place to drop books off. We have to haul them down in a tub in an elevator because there is a parking garage. At any rate, I have them segregated into groups for giving away and keeping. I also have a question for those of you who live in a smaller spaces. Our long-term goal is to be happily living in around 950 - 1,000 square feet. I am really not having too much trouble imagining getting rid of lots of stuff whenever we do downsize (as another poster said, I want to be ready when the time comes), but I stumble over thinking about Christmas decorations??? It's hard for me to imagine not having some kind of separate storage unit for certain items. We also have a few toys and children's books that we want to hold onto for potenial grandchildren. We would never have gobs and gobs of separated storage, but I think we would need/want some. Does this mean I am not thinking about this in the right way? I am not generally a cluttered person. We spent the weekend visiting with friends and, while I love them dearly, their house drives me crazy! So. much. stuff. It was so funny because they had clearly told their daughters to make their beds, but there were PILES of things - books, papers, clothes, all over the floors, dressers, etc. I can't stand piles! They also have an excessive amount of memorabilia and dishes and glassware! So many items from the homes of grandparents and parents. And, the husband said they have two additional storage units to boot! Spending time with them as well as stumbling upon this thread has really inspired me to purge.

http://www.washingtonpost.com/local/education/early-admission-rates-for-class-of-2019/2014/12/18/67db5036-86c4-11e4-9534-f79a23c40e6c_story.html As I said, above, Georgetown is an anomoly. It is also EA, not ED.

A grand idea, though they only have two days that are not filled to the brim with their group itinerary. But, he should definitely do some research on where he might want to go on those days off! They have to get permission for something like that (which, as a mom, I like!).

Yes, we were aware that the legal drinking age was 18. We lived in Leeds for two years. It's definitely worth discussing some ahead of time. Thank you.

The course is not designed by the UK university. It's just an in-residence program there through his university here. What, specifically, do you mean about the drinking culture that might be differen there than here? I'm all ears.

We have taken care of both of these, and ds has also informed his bank that he is heading out of the coutnry.

Ds leaves on Friday for a three-week study abroad seminar to the UK. It's a small group of around 15-16 students, and the idea of these for-credit summer study abroad programs is to allow students to get a "taste" of study abroad before they do an entire quarter. We lived in the UK for two years, and I am very comfortable with his traveling there because of my familiarity with it. We have traveled quite a bit ourselves, but there is always something new to learn, and it has certainly been a very long time since I studied overseas as a student. Any tips at all? Anyone know if he can carry on those little detergent pods? He'll have to do some laundry while there, and I thought that might be a good idea, but I didn't know if they would be allowed in his quart-sized bag or not??? Guess I should Google that!

Thank you! We feel that way, too. I whole-heartedly agree with the process and with keeping the option open to change something if it isn't working. Letting her know that this is what you *think* will work but acknowledging that this is new territory for everyone takes off the pressure to get it *exactly* right from the get-go.

We decided on a monthly amount to give ds when he went to college. This was to cover any meals out, entertainment, movies, haircuts, hygiene prodcuts, school supplies, etc. We told ds that if he found that amount to be insufficient, he would need to track his expenses for a couple of months and demonstrate to us that he was really having to live as a miser if he wanted an increase. We wanted him to have some fun money, but not too much. That hasn't happened, and he does save a good portion of what we give him. I suppose some families would cut back the monthly amount at that point, but we have not. Mostly because he IS saving. As soon as he turned 18, he opened an investment account. He has enjoyed spending some time out with this friends this summer, but he had in mind an ending summer balance that he wanted to have in his account, and he will exceed that. One of my many mantras is "just because you can do something, doesn't mean you should do something." Just because he could spend more because he doesn't spend every dime we give him, doesn't mean that he should spend it all. And he doesn't. In the same line of thinking, just because we could give ds more than we do doesn't mean we should give ds more. We told him that choosing a full-pay school meant we would not pay for summer travel. We could, but that doesn't mean we should. So, he had to save to pay for his airfare for his trip to the UK. Some savings were from the monthly money we gave him that he opted not to spend, and some was from part-time working. In fact, he had all of his money from his part-time job on campus direct deposited into his savings account. Of course, he could move it easily if he needed/wanted to. I have a friend who has been going through this with her senior in high school. She is more pay-as-you go when he asks for money, but often they don't agree on what he spends his money on (too much fast food and eating out as examples). They bicker about it. To me, it is much easier just to say this is how much you get because we think this is reasonable and let them spend it as they want. No need to micromanage or quibble about choices. I personally like the idea of giving a certain amount and letting dc allocate how they want to spend it as opposed to covering certain items as I believe this assists with the concept of budgeting. Ds's amount is to also cover necessities such as personal hygiene items, school supplies, etc. We all have to budget between necessities (food, clothing, insurance, taxes, haircuts, gas) and frivolities (dining out, entertainment, fancier clothing, etc.). I think the monthly amount facilitates teaching how to find the proper balance. Sorry - this is rather rambling. Not sure if that is a result of too much coffee or not enough. :)

No way would I tick off the GC. It is usually recommended that one waive rights to see all recommendation letters. Thus, you and your dd will never see what the GC writes. If it is a large B&M school, I think most of the GC letters don't carry much weight since they write so many and are usually rather similar to each other. Now, if the GC knows the child well, s/he likely is better able to write a personalized letter about the student. Those, I believe, can definitely add to the application. And a negative recommendation letter could definitely take away from an application. My point is that if you are in a position where you are likely to receive a neutral letter (b/c your daughter is one of the masses), do you really want to take the risk of having her remember your dd in a way that might cause her to write something negative? Or less positive? I (and I am sure everyone) would like to think that a GC would be professional enough not to sabotage or write an unfavorable letter. But, you never know. Why take the risk? I would work hard to stay in the good graces of the GC. Even if the GC doesn't write anything terrible, there are different degrees of "positive" language. "Good student" hardly compares to "one of the strongest students in her class, a natural leader, admired by teachers and peers alike."

Ds is also on quarters and doesn't return until September 17th. Having experienced being the very last one to go last year, he wisely chose a summer seminar abroad that lasts three weeks. He leaves for that Friday and then has one week at home (but that will include two nights spend out-of-town with grandparents. :/) before he returns to school. Honeslty? I am ready to have some routine back in my life, and he is ready to go. The rest of his friends are trickling away this next week. So, yes, there will be many last hurrahs. One or two have already gone.

Ha ha - no. So at least it wasn't a new skill I had to learn.

Glad to see the update!

This is why I drink.

I am slowly learning to go with the flow. Ds has an overall plan, but the details of that do seem to fluctuate (more frequently than I would like). For whatever reason, ds and his peers seem to not be the best of planners. The weight of the decision seems to have no impact at all from my outside observation. In other words, the fluidity of majors/minors/study abroad/summer work and internships seems to be as "loose" with regard to planning as where they are going out to dinner or what movie they will see. As an only-child OCD person, this drives me bonkers!!! I try to interject reasonable thoughts - sometimes they are appreciated, sometimes not. Ds has now learned to end every potential change with, "Don't worry - I will finish in four years." Ha ha! At least my primary concern has taken hold. There will be no grafting onto the money tree. Ds is well-aware.

Ha ha - no HE does! ;)

Except for Georgetown (which is actually EA, not ED), all schools I know of take a much higher percentage in ED. Georgetown usually has a lower EA rate than RD rate. It's an anomoly though. UPenn last year had a 25% acceptance rate for its ED round. Not only that, but they filled almost half the slots for their incoming freshman class through ED. I think filling around 40% in ED is pretty common. I would go for it with the caveat of continuing to work on other apps while she waits for her decision. I agree that many hooked applicants (legacies, athletes, URMs, and children of large donors), but I still think that odds are better in the early round. However, better to be up-to-speed on other apps if she is denied or deferred from her ED choice.

We did not send one but should have. Ds had two dorm trips that he took that required sleeping bags. Fortunately, both were after Christmas, but he did have to lug it back with him when he returned from Christmas break. Others have suggested good reasons for having one on hand just in case. If you have room, I would take one.

Is this an alumni interview? Or with a school official? Ds had a few alumni interviews. Some specifically asked that he not bring anything with him. Maybe your ds could query before he goes. Definitely should have some questions in mind to ask - preferably things that cannot be gleaned from the website. ;) I think khakis and a button down are perfect!