No hunting here. Neither of our families hunt, or our friends. It's not something we'd think about doing, and my husband is very, very anti-gun and wouldn't bring our kids anywhere near one.

I have a feeling I'll be very much disagreed with, but I wouldn't be overly concerned with setting up future bad habits. You have to deal with where he is right now. If this works for both of you, and makes meal times more pleasant for everybody, then I'd stick with it for now. He's not going to be eating that way when he's 15 because you let him do it when he was 16 months.

I use it for disposable diapers and for Mrs. Meyers all-purpose cleaning solution. I love it. It's great because you can cancel or change the frequency at any time. So, when we're using cloth more often, I'll only have the disposables delivered every three months or so. When the kids are in disposables more, I'll have them delivered once a month. I get the cleaning solution delivered 1-2 times a year.

I said both "other" and "yes, as much as we can." We both work at a university. If we are working at this or another university when our kids are old enough for college, and they can go for free or for very reduced tuition, then that's what we'll pay for. Unless we happen to come into lots of money, which is unlikely, or our kids have a really, really pressing reason to go somewhere else, we won't be paying for them to go college when they could go for free or very little at the school where we work. If they insisted on going somewhere else, we'd help (we'd kick in at least what we'd have to kick in for then to go where we work), but it's not likely we could cover it all. O/T, but we've been watching The Cosby Show, and on one of the first season episodes (back in 1984), Cliff is talking about his daughter who is at Princeton, and is apparently paying a little more than $10K/year for her to go there. To Princeton. I have no idea what it costs today, but I'm assuming it's way more than that. It's really shocking how much faster college costs have risen compared to wages in the last 25 years. (We also learned that, in 1984, apartments in Manhattan went for about $400/month. I'm pretty sure it's more like $4000/month today. DH and I can't help but feel like we were born at the wrong time. ;))

I can see her point. Most of the people I know who took a very long time to finish college--6 or 7 or more years--either declared a major very early on or started college in a very specific program. Then they changed their minds, and a bunch of the classes they'd taken were pretty much worthless, so they were stuck with two years of classes that, while they did count toward graduation credits, didn't fulfill either general ed requirements or the requirements of their new major. I'd probably prefer my kids take general ed courses at least for the first year, even if they felt pretty sure they knew what they wanted to major in, so they'd avoid that situation. It's really not that hard to complete a major and minor in two years, if you get all of your gen ed classes out of the way your first two years.

I'm wondering if people are aware of any studies that have compared how students who pay their own way do compared to students whose parents pay? I'm curious because people have such different opinions on this. I tend to find that my students who pay their own way see themselves more as customers, and tend to have a "the customer is always right" mindset: they think they are entitled to certain grades, to rules being bent, and to having access to me whenever they want it because, after all, they are paying for things. But obviously other people have a very different view. I'd be interested in the research, if any, that has been done on this.

Human memory is a fascinating thing. If you ask a group of people who all witnessed the exact same event to recall it, even very shortly after the fact, they will have very different memories. It's also really easy to create "false memories" in people by telling them stories about things that didn't actually happen to them. I don't think people would make things up on purpose, most of the time, but I do think that it's very likely that many people have "memories" that include things they don't actually recall. I do think that many of my childhood memories are a mix of what actually happened, stories I've been told about what happened, and other details I've added in for whatever reason. I do know that there's a lot of things I "remember" where I don't know if I'm recalling the actual event, recalling what others have told me about the event, recalling what I think happened based on pictures I've seen/things I've read of the event, or some combination of all of those. I have what feels like a very clear memory of my aunt visiting me when I lived in my parents' first apartment. I would have been a year old at the time, though, maybe younger, so I doubt I really remember it. I think I just heard stories so many times about how she used to come over to visit all the time when we lived there, and I've seen pictures of the room, that it feels like a memory. Memory is one of those subjects I just find so, so interesting.

Other. If we can pay for our kids to go to college (or if one/both of us is working at a university and they can attend for free), then we will. If we can't, we can't. As to the "entitled" issue, I don't know. I think that students should be entitled to a college education provided they meet certain academic criteria, because that is now an expectation for many jobs. But, I don't think that parents are the ones who should have to pay for it. I'd prefer to see us have a system more like European countries, where less people go to college and it's harder to get in but its fully or largely subsidized for those who do go. Given how things currently are, I'd say that if a parent insists that their child attends college, then that child is entitled to having their college education paid for by said parent. In other situations, I think it's a very good thing if a parent can pay for their child's education and does so, but it's not something that I think they must do.

My DH has an insanely good memory for movies he's watched. He can remember pretty much the entire plot and most of the details of every movie he's ever seen, even ones he only watched once and when he was a little kid. I think it's very strange. He thinks it's weird that I don't remember half of what happened in movies I saw last year. (Sometimes I don't even remember I watched them!) But I tend to be knitting or doing something else during movies, so maybe I'm just not paying close enough attention.

Other. Generally, I grow my hair out until I get sick of it, and then cut it short. Then I grow it out again. I've been growing it for about a year now, though, and haven't gotten sick of it yet. If I need a little trim, I just let DH do it. My hair is really, really curly, so if it's not cut perfectly evenly, you can't tell.

I don't think it sounds weird. Unless I'm weird. ;) I had a really boring, conventionally happy childhood, and my memory is really spotty. In fact, my memory of most of my life is pretty spotty, even in my college years and twenties. I can remember certain nights during my junior year of high school almost moment-by-moment, for example, but I could not tell you who my English teacher was that year or anything I read in that class. For me, I think it's that I have a tendency to not be in the moment. Most of the time I'm either planning, daydreaming, or worrying. My brain is just somewhere else.

I've given up on the idea of becoming fluent in a foreign language. Maybe if I end up living in another country for a really long time. Otherwise, it's not going to happen. I also realized that I have no desire to get over my fear of heights or to run a marathon. And my life will be just fine even if I die without ever having successfully done a split.

It's probably a good thing we don't have cable, because when I visit my parents or my ILs, I can spend all day doing nothing but watching reruns of the various Law & Orders and of Criminal Minds.

DH and I watch Community and Parks and Recreation together when there's a new episode. Sometimes I watch The Office and 30 Rock with him, sometimes I don't. If we remember, we all watch The Middle and Modern Family. DS really likes both of those. I think that's it right now. We do watch a lot of TV shows on Netflix, though. Right now we're working our way through The Cosby Show.

Sorry, but that's what it's called. ;) Anyway, are there things that, at one point in your life, you thought were really important and/or really felt like you had to do, that you came to decide just weren't all that important?

I hope that didn't come across as if I was scolding! I think it's a great piece and I'm glad you brought it up again.

I'm pretty sure my nose was clean and my zipper was up. But, it's definitely a possibility that I just looked funny. ;)

I'm particularly interested, obviously, in responses from Muslims. But if anybody else knows, that's good, too. ;) I was in Best Buy yesterday, and there was a Muslim family there shopping in the same aisle. The women all wore hijab. One of the older men in the family was looking at me in kind of a weird way. Maybe I just looked funny or something, but I started to wonder if maybe he thought I was being immodest because I don't cover my head. I dress pretty conservatively, and yesterday I had on jeans and a sweater, so I doubt it had anything to do with what I was wearing. (Although, it's also quite possible that he was looking at my baby, who was in a sling, or my zipper was down, or something else.) So it got me wondering if, in general, Muslims who cover (or, if male, who come from backgrounds/cultures where the women cover) think that non-Muslim women who don't are being immodest. I know there have been a number of threads here which seem to indicate that a lot of Christians who practice a certain style of "modest" dress believe that women who dress differently are being immodest/inappropriate. Is a head covering, for Muslims, primarily a matter of modesty or one of devotion, or both, or something else? Are non-Muslims who don't cover their heads seen as immodest or inappropriate? Do Muslim men feel like they are being assaulted by floozies if they go out and most women have their hair showing, as I've heard some Christian men describe it (well, not exactly like that, but that seems to be the point)? I hope that doesn't sound facetious, because while I'm being a bit silly, it is a genuine question. I live in an area with a large Muslim population and I have a lot of Muslims students, and it never really occurred to me before that I might somehow be offending them because I don't cover my head (not that I'd start doing it, any more than I'd start wearing long dresses everyday so as not to offend somebody who thinks women shouldn't wear pants). So I'm curious about whether that is something that Muslims feel, or whether it just doesn't bother them if non-Muslims dress differently.

I read this the other day, after it was linked to on here. I'm not a conservative Christian, and I don't homeschool for religious reasons, and I still found a lot in it that really hit home.

I think "shut your trap" is the same as "shut up." I personally wouldn't want my kids using it, and it's not something that would be okay to say to another person in our house. That said, I can completely see how my son could drive a person to tell him to "shut up," and I couldn't blame them for it.

Ha, I realize I forgot the point of my nose ring story! I'm a bit sleep-deprived. In hindsight, I wouldn't have gone behind my mom's back. I probably would have done it anyway, but I would have at least let her know that I was going to do it beforehand. I don't think that just coming home with it was the best idea. If you've got enough hair to donate, you might be able to get a free haircut. The last time I cut my hair, there was enough to donate, and at the place where I went, they would cut your hair for free if you were willing to donate it.

When I was 17, I came home with a nose ring. My mother flipped out. She was about ready to disown me, I think. She didn't talk to me for almost a week. Then, she realized it wasn't a big deal. In fact, I came home from college a few years later, when my sister was 17. My mother was eager for me to see my sister's "adorable" tongue ring. I got a week of the silent treatment, my sister got my parents laughing about how silly her tongue ring was. That was like the story of my (teenage) life. I'd do something, my parents would act like it was the end of the world, then they'd realize it wasn't a big deal and didn't change anything, and when my sister did it, my parents either didn't care or were actually enthusiastic about it. I will say, I love my DD's curly hair. I just love it. My husband has warned me that, when she's a preteen and/or teen, she'll probably straighten her hair, just like I did. I think it's going to break my heart a little, tiny bit when she does, and I'm going to have to work really hard to bite my tongue and not tell her to leave it like it naturally is. So, I can also see where your mom was coming from. Anyway, I'm glad you and your mom worked this out. Enjoy your haircut!

I have kids running wildly in front of the computer as I've been reading this, so I might have missed it. But, re: the AA vs. black issue, my understanding is that African-American is often used to refer specifically to the descendants of slaves. "Black" is a broader term, and would encompass groups like more recent Caribbean immigrants.

I'm fat and always miserable when it's cold out. Well, that's not entirely true. The two winters I've been significantly pregnant, I was quite warm. But, when I'm not pregnant, I'm miserable if it gets below 60 outside and I get cranky if it's below 68 in the house. Even then I'm chilly. Today I was so cold I couldn't get warm enough to take a nap, even though I finally had both babies asleep at the same time. I am NOT looking forward to another Michigan winter. Last winter, the only time I wasn't at least a little cold was when I was taking a hot bath or shower, or while I was doing a long workout. I do find that really warm socks, a wool cowl and mitts (I love to knit both, so that's easy), and loads of blankets help, as well. We really don't like to keep the heat above 68 during the day and 65 at night. If DH had his way, we'd keep it at 64 all the time, but I really cannot function when it's that cold in the house.

My best friend finished her Ph.D. when she was 26. And she was a REALLY young looking 26; she could have easily been taken for 19 or 20. So, when she was job searching, in order to be taken more seriously, she started wearing fake glasses (she actually did look older and more "serious" with them on). She got one of the jobs she interviewed for while wearing her fake glasses. So then she felt like she had to wear them for her faculty photo. Then she felt like she had to wear them when she was teaching. She spent her entire first semester there wearing fake glasses! It was really funny.