No. But let's try being honest about the risks of the vaccines. And let's be honest about the risks of the diseases. SOME of the vaccines should not be on the market at all. SOME of the vaccines are pushed toward people who shouldn't be receiving them. So let's be a bit more understanding when people say, "If you're going to lie to me about all that, why should I trust you with this?" especially when we're talking about their children. It's an example of manipulation. It isn't honest. It doesn't help parents make informed decisions. And it doesn't take an expert to see that.

:iagree: This!!!! It's very hard to trust the "experts" when they refuse to be honest. The parents have to decide what is best for THEIR CHILD. It's nearly impossible for parents to get decent, unbiased information on vaccines. Why is that?! When the swine flu came out, my OB was pushing all of his pregnant patients to get the vaccine. I checked the insert. There were no safety studies done for pregnant women, fetuses, or infants under 6 mos of age. They had no clue what the vaccine could do to pregnant women, unborn children, or infants. But my OB and many other officials were insistent that the vaccine was safer than the flu. That was a lie. They could not know that. Pertussis is another great example of health officials not being honest. My pediatrician was showing us a study conducted on whooping cough and using it as a reason to get ds the pertussis vaccine. (We delay vaccinations until the kids are older, and ds was only 2 at the time--and he was sick, hence the visit to the dr.) This study was trying to indicate the importance of being vaccinated. And to emphasize this, it pointed out that ~27% of kids that contracted pertussis had never been vaccinated. I may not remember that number exactly, but it was around that. They worded it nice and convincing that your child was in serious danger of contracting pertussis if he was not vaccinated, but seriously!! I can do math. If 27% had never been vaccinated, that meant that the remaining 73% had received some form of vaccination! And you're trying to convince me that vaccine is worth it? :confused1: The point of the pertussis story is not the validity of the vaccine, but the fact that the officials were not being honest about the effectiveness of it. And I don't mean just my pediatrician. I'm talking about the company that promoted this study through the brochure and news articles as a means to increase dtap vaccinations. I understand the value of vaccinations. I do not want to return to the days where diseases were a serious threat. But don't lie to me or try to underplay the risks of any procedure when I have to make a decision on my child's health and future. With that said, when officials constantly lie or deceive, then they only have themselves to blame when people do not trust them anymore. So if anyone is worried about the rates of the unvaccinated and risks to society, the first step to resolving this issue, is honesty, not ridicule or condemnation.

Pretty much what's already been said. I was not impressed with the writing. Divergent did pull you in, but the other two got progressively worse. The ending, IMO, was pointless and a lazy attempt to make an acclaimed series that readers love. It failed miserably and was a violation of the readers' trust. I will never read another Veronica Roth book. My dd hated the ending as much as I did, but she still wants to see the movie. If they change the ending, then maybe I'll watch the movies.

I'm pretty laid-back w/ our trampoline. Actually, I'm pretty laid back w/ my kids' play, period. My trampoline rules consist of: no sticks/swords/baseball bats or other sword-like objects on the trampoline and no skates or scooters. I can easily watch the kids on it from inside, so I do call them out if they're getting too rough. I started out with a lot more rules, but in reality, the kids do a better job of policing the trampoline than I do. They make and adjust the rules based on who's playing. If we have visitors, then I do lay down some additional rules like who and how many can get on it. And if they're younger kids (not teens) then I make sure they have their parent's permission. I really don't get the shoe thing, though. I'd just as soon my kids didn't take their shoes off.

I disagree with the idea that any gift represents thought. Hugely disagree. If my dh went to CVS and bought me a cheap thing of chocolates, knowing I like chocolate, then I would be pleased. However, if my dh went to CVS and bought some chocolates just because it was Valentine's Day (or whatever) and felt like he *had* to buy a gift and so just grabbed whatever, then I would feel placated and condescended toward and would most definitely be unhappy. And if by chance, I didn't like chocolate (and I know women IRL that don't!) or something, I'd be upset. So really, IMO, gifts SHOULD require some thought of who you're giving it to! Being given a gift to make the giver feel better is pointless, and I don't think it makes anyone picky to say that. OTOH, people can definitely put too much requirement on the giver. If the giver is making an effort (even if seems small to you) to please you, then I think some grace should be extended and the gifted should assume the best. If the giver is obviously doing it just 'cause it's expected or to make himself feel like he's done a good thing, then...well...I think you have a right to be upset. IMO, it really does depend on the situation!

What I'm trying to say is that choosing to reject someone's gender can be the indication of other things, like abuse, and I would want to know if there was something else going on. I would not just assume that my son was born wanting to be a girl, or vice versa. That is totally different to me than kids playing with things traditionally associated with the opposite gender. Boys playing with dolls and girls playing with swords are pretty common and perfectly natural, IMO. But a child NOT wanting to be a boy, when he is a boy, can be a warning sign, so I would treat it completely different. And unfortunately, it seems that abuse is more statistically likely than actually being born transgender. That's all. I guess it's like when a kids gets the sniffles. All kids gets sniffles. No biggie. You treat it. You move one. But a 104 degree temp could be the same sniffles manifested differently in a particular child....or it could be the sign of something more serious. So I would definitely be watching and caring for the kid with the high fever differently than the one with just the sniffles. *Sigh* It's just a comparison...please, don't take it too literally. I'm not saying that kids who are born transgender are sick. I'm just saying it merits a different reaction in me as a parent.

Gender isn't about outward appearances, though. And for nearly all people, it isn't a spectrum. Everyone is different, with different physiological make-ups and different personalities, but still, for most people, you're either male or female. You're not mostly male or mostly female. Those cases where someone is not specifically male or female are rare. If a person who is biologically one gender wants to change themselves to another gender, then most likely, there are other issues at play. I would want to really understand why someone, especially a minor, would want to do that. Either way, the more I would know about the situation means that more I could support and help the child in the direction that's best for him/her.

Thanks everyone. The biggest problem that I see is that she'd like to shadow her cousin, but her cousin is 16. Maybe I could just get away with saying dd's grade instead of her age, since they're in the same grade.

Just a few thoughts.... 1---Did you know that pink was originally considered a boy's color? I think this was back in medieval times or maybe Victorian, I can't remember, but it was a long time ago. Anyway, red was considered masculine. After men's clothes were dyed red, the resulting diluted dye was used for babies and boys clothes, which came out pink. Blue, however, was considered more feminine and used for girls and women's things. Thus, quite a long time ago, boys were dressed in pink and girls were dressed in blue. I have no idea when or why the switch was made. (And this was learned a long time ago, and I don't remember where, so if you want verification, you'll have to look it up yourself. Sorry.) 2---Pink and purple are certainly not gay colors. But I do know some people (like my brother) that think that boys should NEVER wear anything pink. I just shake my head at that, because there is no way I'm going to convince them/him otherwise. These types of views are more prevalent in certain societal or religious circles and areas of the country than others, too. 3---Yes, I do believe that there are gender-specific tendencies, but those are always generalized. GENERALLY speaking, boys have a greater tendency to play-fighting and have actively aggressive behavior while girls are more likely to play co-operatively (work together toward a common goal--like playing house versus cowboys & Indians) and have passively aggressive behavior. Of course, this is in a very broad sense, and while the majority of boys and girls may do this, there are still LOTS that do not. When you add in puberty and hormones, there is a more pronounced difference in gender-specific tendencies. As kids get older, they see what's reflected in their culture and they (usually) want to fit in, so they identify with others like themselves and try to make that happen, which results in greater gender-specific tendencies. But these are not inherent in the child. So you have both cultural pressure and inherent tendencies which show up in a child. 4---As a parent, I don't want my child feeling the need that they MUST conform to the present culture. So, I think it's healthy to allow young children to experiment and play around with lots of things, within reason, of course. And since I'm the parent, I get to be the one who draws that line and says what's "within reason." 5---I don't think it's healthy when a child pushes toward something that denies who they are. For instance, when a boy wants to literally be a girl and takes steps to make it happen, I wonder why they can't accept themselves for who they are. It's possible that there's some biological/health reason for this, but I would wonder why they could not accept themselves for who they are. (And yes, I'm directly referencing the transgender issue. As someone mentioned, there is a difference between being gay and being transgender.) So if my child showed strong tendencies toward wanting to be something they aren't, I'd definitely be investigating what's behind that. 6---I don't think it's healthy to pretend that girls and boys are the same. They're not. But acknowledging there's a difference does NOT mean that one gender is better than the other. And the biggest differences don't show up till puberty. Still, because there are so many people that fall outside the "norm," we should all be careful about pushing those generalities on individuals. (For instance, and I'm just using this as an example, say 70% of boys prefer boyish activities, that still leaves 30% that don't, so that's a lot of boys that don't fall in the "norm.")

My dd14 wants to visit a public school, just for a day, to see what it's like. Has anyone ever done this? Is this even possible? Thoughts?

LOL It's nice to know that there are lots of others that don't sweat stuff like that. Gil, it's not that I (or most on here, I gather) encourage this stuff. There's no inviting of any gender-ambiguity. It's more of the fact that little boys see something they think is cool (sparkly and colorful, like someone mentioned) and want to be a part of it. They don't see it as being "girly." In fact, at the ages we're talking about here, there's really not much difference in their eyes between girls and boys. As soon as they realize that there is gender association with it, they tend to stop. Until then, they just see it as being fun, and like most little kids (and heck, even big kids!) they don't want to be left out. They grow out of it soon enough....But that wasn't meant to be criticism toward you. I think your attitude is perfectly healthy. (Not that my opinion matters. B)) I just wanted to clarify MY position.

Just curious. Who has put nail polish on their boys' nails? I admit. I have. :leaving: My ds3 currently has one green big toe and one blue big toe. My dh isn't overy fond of it, but my dd7 loves getting her nails painted, and her little brothers want paint on them, too! So, occasionally, I will paint their toenails. They get to pick the colors, which are usually their favorites: blue and green. One Christmas, I painted snowmen on one of their fingernails. They thought it was great! I really don't have a problem with it, and my dh isn't overly fond of it. But it's their big brothers that are bothered the most. "But Mom, boys aren't supposed to wear fingernail polish!!!" :lol: I tell them to leave their little brothers alone. They're just having fun with paint. Sometimes, I wonder where they get their ideas from. My oldest ds refuses to wear a necklace, because that's for girls. Doesn't matter how many times we tell him that his Dad and uncles used to wear necklaces all the time. :001_rolleyes: And they all seem to think that pink is for girls only. Dh doesn't have a problem with wearing pink, except that it does NOT look good on him. But I know of at least one of the teens at church regularly wears pink dress shirts, and no one gives him a hard time about it. (That I know of--He's also a football player, very masculine, and no one could accuse him of being "sissy.") I really don't worry about things like this. I know some moms that do, though, and are horrified at the thought of painting a little boy's nails or letting him wear pink. What do you think?

My dd wants to know if a "cuppa" is really as popular as BBC makes it out to be. (She's a huge Sherlock & Dr. Who fan.) And how do you make truly British tea? What kind do you use, etc?

Ice cream! I scraped the seeds from the inside of my used vanilla beans to use in homemade vanilla ice cream. Yummy! And you get those beautiful, tiny black specks of real vanilla in your ice cream, too. :thumbup1:

One of our dogs keeps getting hot spots that I'm pretty sure are related to fleas. For the sake of this thread, lets assume that they ARE flea related and not food/allergy related, which is a whole 'nother topic that I've already studied and addressed. Regardless, I KNOW we have fleas. What kind of flea control do you use and how well does it work? Both dogs are medium-sized and short-haired, and they mostly stay inside.

I've seen those bumper stickers, too, and often wondered what in the world they were referring to! So you weren't the only one clueless! Thanks for cluing me in. :)

I was wondering about this, too.

Your story sounds similar to mine. One of my sisters suffers from mental problems and is paranoid and even delusional. She is supposed to be on medicine, but she keeps coming off/trying to come off. She won't see a counselor. She insists that she doesn't need a counselor or the meds...or at least once things calm down, then she doesn't need the meds anymore. :glare: (Things calmed down BECAUSE you were on your meds!) She does nothing through diet or exercise or any thing that would be helpful. She refuses to acknowledge that she has a problem...it's all someone else's fault that there are problems. (My sis's issues are more constant and less cyclical.) I try not to say anything that encourages her paranoia. When she gets on one of her rants, I listen and ask questions to clarify (she often contradicts herself so she can be confusing) and then try to change the subject: Can I get you something to drink? Do you want to go inside/outside?...That kind of thing. And I don't initiate contact, as sad as that is. I don't know how to help someone who refuses to acknowledge she has a problem. I don't want her issues to pull down my family, particularly the kids. And I don't want to enable her, either. I don't know whether I should directly confront her paranoia, "You are imagining things. No one has hacked your Facebook account (or whatever). Have you talked to a counselor about this?" or whether I just continue to keep my mouth shut. I don't want to hijack your thread. I'm just wondering in cases like yours and mine, cases where people refuse to acknowledge that they have a problem, is it better to pass the bean dip or to challenge the false assumptions? And by better, I mean better for the person who is mentally ill.

Thanks to the suggestions about the mouthwashes. I can do that, and sometimes that does helps with the sores. It just usually doesn't last too long, IME, and it won't prevent a breakout. It's so much better to prevent the breakout to begin with. About the SLS in toothpaste, thank you! I've never thought of that, so that's something I will be looking in to.

The sores are part of the herpes virus. There is nothing that you can do but try to control and treat breakouts. This is pretty well established in the medical community. I know how to treat the symptoms. What I've been looking for is a simple lysine supplement to control the breakouts...keep them from happening to begin with. Apparently, though, there is not such a thing in a kid-friendly format. Cat, yes. Kids, no. So, I can empty capsules or sprinkle powder or any number of things I've done before. It's just that wasn't what I was looking for. Thanks for the thought, though.

I'm in Georgia. It wasn't too long ago that I could purchase raw milk brought in from SC through a co-op, but officials slammed the door on that and then said that ANYONE bringing raw milk into GA could be charged. Honestly, though, if it wasn't such a drive, I'd go there and bring it back myself. Legality be d@amned. I don't know of anyone locally that sells pet-quality (wink-wink) raw milk, though I know that in some areas this is done. The best I can do is get low-temp pasteurized, non-homogenized milk. But even that doesn't work as good. That liquid lysine works, but :eek: :ack2: That stuff is NASTY. But, it is REALLY GOOD STUFF. It has more than just lysine in it, and it is great for when you need something quick. However, it shouldn't be taken on a long-term basis (echinacea and goldenseal content), and it just tastes so :ack2: :ack2: :ack2: that I wouldn't want to deal with giving it out on a long-term basis, either. Lemon Balm has a lot of great uses, but I'm not familiar with it for preventing cold sores, not at the level that lysine does. I'm pretty familiar with herbs, but I don't know of any that works for this. I think it's because most plants have more balanced levels of lysine and arginine, instead of having the much higher lysine content. And yes, I can empty casules, get powder, whatever. I can disguise the taste (to a degree--but that Super Lysine+ extract will always taste bad.) I have done that and can do it again. I was just wanting a easy, liquid or chewable supplement that I can give the kids before bedtime. I honestly didn't think it was asking for too much. They have chewable lysine cat treats, for crying out loud! Why can't they have something for kids? But I've been searching most of the evening, and I haven't found such a thing. :( I did find a probiotic that also has papaya puree. And papaya is one plant-based source that has a high lysine to argenine content. It's apparently way up their with dairy. And the probiotics are good for fighting breakouts, too, so this could be a good thing. Unfortunately, like most probiotics, it needs to be refrigerated so I don't want to risk ordering it online. I will probably call my local health food store tomorrow to see if they have it. Anyway, thanks again for everyone's suggestions. Sorry about the whining.

I could. And I may have to break down and do that. I was just hoping for something more convenient, like a nice tidy little chewable or something. :blush: Obviously, if I can't find such a thing, then I will be making whatever adjustments are necessary, because they can't keep having to deal with this.

Cute video!! We have a dog stocking and a cat stocking. The dog stockings make it convenient to restock their toy basket, cause after a year, they're in desperate need of new toys. The cat toys are as much for the kids to play with the cats as anything.

Nuts, and this includes peanuts, not just tree nuts, are actually not a good thing for cold/canker sores (herpes virus). They're much higher in arginine which typicially makes them worse. So it's not just the amount lysine in a food, it's the lysine to arginine ratio where you need the lysine to be much higher than the arginine. Dairy typically is the highest source of high lysine (low argenine) in foods. Meats are also high. I believe. A supplement that could be taken once a day would just be so much easier. A glass of raw milk a day would keep things in check, but this pasteurized stuff just doesn't seem to work as well.

Happy Solstice! Love hearing about everyone's traditions for the occasion.