Huh. DH and I usually sit close, often touching or an arm around, and today I was rubbing his back about because it was spasming. I also often touch my kids if they are sitting near me, rub a hand over their head, etc. Never thought of it as a date or anything.

Not fair.

Interesting. I'd say our UCC church is liturgicalish, lol. So we have announcements, an introit where we listen to a song, a hymn, a responsorial prayer, (I may have these out of order) and then the passing of the peace. During the passing of the peace time (just maybe 2 minutes) the kids go up to the front of the church for "young church" which is a message delivered by the youth minister to them, that usually is pretty insightful for us adults too. But short. Then the kids process out to Sunday School and we sing a "song of support" as they go - alternates between things like "This Little Light of Mine" or "All things Bright and Beautiful" or whatever. Then we have the readings from the Old and New Testament, then the sermon, offering (choir sings during that), prayer, and a final hymn. So the passing of the peace isn't very long, but does get a bit hectic with kids scrambling out of the pews.

same!!! I saw a headline about it the other day and my first half conscious thought was it was a satire news site! That area picked drought and earthquakes, not hurricanes and flooding. No fair for mother nature to switch it up all of a sudden!

So I paid attention today at church after this thread. I hugged DH, the kids bolted up to the front for "young church" before I got a chance to hug them (today was "Splash Sunday School" to celebrate the end of summer/back to school so they were more eager than usual), the person on my right was busy talking to someone else, the person in front of me and to the right had her hands clasped in front of her so I just nodded rather than offering a hand shake. The women behind me leaned toward me a bit, so with that body language I offered a hand shake and they seemed eager to do that. Some said "peace be with you" and some said, "good morning". No hugs other than my own family.

I think as kids get older it is easier to spend the money, for sure. I mean, my 5th grader isn't going on any undersea adventures, and he's not doing any outsourced classes other than the drop off stem program. We also cannot use the money for camps unless they are special needs camps that specifically target a special need. So can't use it for say, an ecology summer camp. But...some get around this by using the private part time tutoring - again that only applies if the people at the camp leading it have the credentials. So our STEM program did charge the state ESA for the half day week long summer camp, charging it as part time tutoring, as they are credentialed for tutoring science and they did teach the kids science there. But a lot of camps have not done that, or don't meet the requirements. It's all sort of topsy turvey.

Interesting! Here it is the opposite. Very easy to get supplies covered but hybrid schools are hard- only way to do it is under part time tutoring usually and then need to prove instructor has a degree in the field being taught or teaching certification or proof of a certain number of years of experience. There is a provision for “homeschool program “ but anything that calls itself a school - hybrid or otherwise- is not considered a homeschool program. computers and printers are covered in the one for kids with special needs but are not covered by the one open to all homeschoolers. Although that may change due to pushback- they DO cover TVs and I think gaming systems if you buy it with educational games? Seems an inexpensive laptop would be a way better use of funds than an Xbox but what do I know? What really annoys me is that this year tickets to Florida theme parks are covered! I mean, yes you CAN do educational programs there but I doubt most are going to. And when they added theme parks that also added a spending cap for field trips- I’m guessing to keep people from spending every other week at Disney. Which means I need to be careful about things like museum and zoo and play tickets because those can add up.

I have never come close to spending it all. Ours do roll over and can be used for job training or college or technical school. That is the ESA for kids with special needs does- the one for all other homeschool kids is just starting so no idea yet on that one.

I think a gift card to a restaurant that does delivery, or even door dash, might be appreciated. Door dash can also be used for say, drug stores or grocery stores, so if she is home alone and runs low on diapers or needs more rash ointment or whateve,r she can get that delivered with door dash.

Hm..when i said I agree with him I meant regarding more formal goals. I still love to try new things, but I don't do formal goal setting or whatever. I just impulsively try them. That way, with no formal goal, I don't feel badly if it doesn't go well.

I would say in my experience that is true for most mainline denominations, including Presbyterian USA, Lutheran, Episcopalian, etc. I've only seen the hands raised thing in non denominational and southern baptist type churches. To be clear, before services people greet each other, and afterward you can't walk down the main aisle for people hugging and chatting and enthusiastically greeting each other. But at that point those uncomfortable with it can sneak off.

Wool can be nice. I made DD a quit with wool batting and I love it - not as hot as polyester and lighter than cotton.

I actually am the same as he is. Goals are self defeating for me. As another person said, I do better to focus on habits and small steps, not goals. I think it is an ADHD thing - after so many failures you just can't face doing it again, setting those expectations again.

Yes, it is supposed to be a joyful but also serious moment of sharing peace amongst each other. I guess I'm lucky I have always found that...or I'm so picky I wouldn't have stayed at a church that did it differently? I'm am definitely now realizing that people are describing VERY different things! This was what I was thinking of, not the orgy of hugs and random chatter others were saying. Even in the church I spoke of where the pastor came into the pews to shake hands it was still a formal "peace be with you" thing. I do hug my own family - and I kiss my kids on the top of the head usually, but just shake hands with anyone else in easy reaching distance and nod and smile at anyone further away that makes eye contact (or anyone that appears not to want to shake hands)

oh, that second thing I would find annoying.

You know, I realized it probably helps that I don't attend packed to the gills churches. It is easy enough to position yourself far enough away from people that you can wave rather than touch.

To clarify, it is NOT supposed to be a regular old time of greeting. The point is to offer each other peace, and show friendship and solidarity before communing together, as indicated in the articles I posted. I wonder if people have become more bothered by handshakes because we don't use them all the time? Like, if we grew up where were shaking hands regularly in day to day life would they still be as bothersome? Or do they feel odd because we don't do it much?

oh my goodness! I think that is what she wants! She mentioned it was 'made up of many thing strings/fibers" so I'm thinking fiber is the word I needed. Thank you! I'm going to order it!

yikes!!!! I think it is TOTALLY appropriate to say, "Ouch!" loudly if that happens! Someone needs to teach them how to shake appropriately! I even warn my kids as they get older to be extra gentle when shaking elderly people's hands due to arthritis.

This reminds me of a comedian talking about bowling as a sport, and how they even have sports commentators: Commentator: So, Bob, you did great last week, what is your strategy for this week? Bob the Bowler: Well...um.....I guess I'm planning to knock down them there pins.

Ok...so I was responding with the assumption we were talking about hand shakes as the standard, not hugs as the standard. I do agree that a hug is more problematic as far as intruding on people's comfort zone. I think even an introvert can, assuming no ASD or OCD or immune system problems, handle a brief handshake and the symbolism is important enough to push through and make the effort as a gesture of peace and brotherhood. A hug is more than I would ask someone to "push through" given it is not the customary greeting among Americans. And I certainly would never force a child to hug someone they didn't want to hug. A handshake? I'd not force them, but I do encourage them and usually even my toddlers were happy to partake in that.

My dd13 is getting really into this. We had a kit with two kinds of string but they were unlabled. And she liked one and disliked the other. I've tried ordering different string, but none of it is "right", and it is a bit too stretchy for the "bead pets" and also hard to tie. Anyone have string they like? DD13 is having trouble explaining what she needs, and ended up getting kind of upset when I was trying to help her find something else (overwhelmed because she doesn't really know what she is looking for)

Ok, if you are at a church where people think single moms are immoral you likely need a whole different church. Handshakes or no handshakes. Cause that's a horrid vibe to be feeling. And I get that likely no one said it out loud, but I also know what it is like to pick up on icky vibes. Hugs.

Ok, so it turns out I feel more strongly about this than I realized, lol....enough to pull up some articles about it. This one comes from my own spiritual background and in reading it I learned that at the time of my baptism the church did NOT pass the peace! It was added back into the liturgy with the 1979 prayer book, and I was baptized in 1976. I was obviously too young to remember a time when we didn't. In my own experience, I remember at one small church I attended the priest would leave the altar and shake hands with EVERY person there, because he said before communion he needed to be sure he was right with everyone, just as Jesus said. https://www.stgeorgescalgary.com/who-we-are/we-are-anglican/pages/what-is-passing-the-peace This is from a Presbyterian church, it goes into the "holy kiss" greeting and states (which I also agree with) The passing of the peace has been a central element of the Christian tradition almost as long as there has been a Christian tradition. https://www.fpch.org/blog/the-passing-of-the-peace-symbolic-or-sacred-by-nelson-steinert#:~:text=The passing of the peace has been a central element,the majority of Paul's letters. From a reformed tradition -This was my favorite as far as just the modern and yet timeless meaning of shaking hands and how our bodies reflect and also shape our thoughts. https://www.reformedworship.org/article/march-2011/passing-peace "Post-game handshakes are a time-honored tradition. Little League baseball players, traveling soccer teams, and NCAA athletes never miss this ritual of sportsmanship. During the game they “fight,” engage in “battle,” “conquer,” or suffer “defeat.” But at the end of the day athletes are not at war. By a simple hand gesture, athletes declare that they are at peace. Communal practices like post-game handshakes are simple but profound in meaning and significance.... Christian worship is filled with profound actions: heads bowed in prayer, arms raised in praise, standing in reverence during a Scripture reading, coming forward to give an offering. One ancient and significant gesture in worship is the passing of the peace. Passing the peace is a tradition rooted in Scripture that embodies our identity as peacemakers (Matt. 5:9; 2 Cor. 5:20) and trains ours hearts, hands, and tongues in the ways of peace." (sorry about wonky font size...I need more coffee to figure out how to fix it)

Thoughts... My church says to "greet one another as you feel comfortable" and specifically says in the bulliten and usually out loud that some will be more comfortable with a wave or holding peace sign (during covid everyone used the peace sign or elbow bump instead of shaking hands). If you don't want to shake hands you just preemptively wave or nod and people get it. That said, are you seriously saying that shaking someone's hand is somehow flirting or implies interest in a sexual relationship or something? Sure, I'm against making out in the sanctuary, but exchanging normal handshakes like you would with a business colleague isn't likely to lead anyone down a path of sin. It is a normal greeting for our society. In other communities a normal greeting may be a hug, or a kiss on the cheek, and I wouldn't think those are flirting either if they are the typical greeting of the community. But no one should feel forced into physical contact if they have sensory or other issues that make such contact uncomfortable. I'm kind of sad that just quickly shaking hands has become so uncomfortable for so many - human contact is such a basic human need, and I can't help but think that there is something to be gained in a young person shaking hands with people of different ages and backgrounds - feeling the callouses and cuts on the mechanic's hand, feeling the paperthin skin of the elderly woman, etc. In Jesus's time people kissed, now we find a hand shake too much. So I think shaking hands is good for us if we are not truly just miserable from it. And if we are, people should be compassionate and follow our signals to just wave instead.