For the record, I think your husband is cool. I think the Habitat for Humanity suggestion is excellent.

I have to disagree with sending a very formal letter. I think that would likely exacerbate the situation. I think it is better for the husband, wife, and children to make a very firm plan and expect to implement it immediately when the boundaries are tested (and they WILL be tested, probably right away).

Sent you a PM.

I'm sorry, but seriously, I would not move there with that level of toxicity of the family. And especially since it sounds like DH will throw you under the bus when things get tough.

Nope, you're not the only one. We started back last week Wed-Fri. They will do some school today as well. We will have two speech and debate tournaments (one to travel to and attend Wed-Sun, and one to HOST two weeks later), so we will probably end up with some time off in-between those two.

Actually, I think it is just BECAUSE you are in the beginning stages of a long, serious crisis that you must tell your DH. Although your intentions are good, I'm concerned that you will inadvertently be encouraging Step-MIL to act up MORE during this time. Even if you speak to her yourself. Especially if you speak to her yourself. This will embolden her because she will know that you will peace-fake and maneuver behind your husband's back (again, very well-intentioned). She will love this drama and control over you and will act up more to see you dance. But your children will get caught in the cross-fire. Habitual boundary-crossers do NOT think the same way we do. And they become much, much worse when either 1) people enable them and contort themselves to keep the peace or 2) there is a big family crisis. Combine the two? Kryptonite. I think you should take your DH out to lunch, ask him how he's feeling about MIL's situation, listen to him for a while, and perhaps, over dessert, tell him gently that you don't want to add to his stress but that you must tell him about this so you can determine a strategy together. Ask him how active a role he wants you to play. The encounter does NOT have to be a vent/dump and run situation where you leave him holding the bag. But I do think he must be told.

nm

Wow, that is unusual. Most doctors in my state want the patient to stay on shots for at least six months to get the hang of it before attempting the complexity of a pump. I don't blame your son for not wanting to hear about it right now! Enough time for it later. Be prepared, though, the pump is not cheap. Even with good insurance, we were out of pocket over $1K. But even as a cheapskate I can say that it has been worth it.

My 16yo daughter was diagnosed when 12yo, almost 13 (considered a "late" T1 diagnosis). I turned to books, online forums, and an "in-person" support group locally. However, the last ends up focusing 95% about how to deal with the school systems, so a lot of it is not relevant to me, although it makes me VERY thankful we homeschool. I am unaware of ANY other T1 homeschoolers in our area, so it can get a little lonely, but I do think that home schooled T1s have it way easier. We also made carb charts for common homemade meals that we eat, to make carb counting a little less overwhelming in the early days. That helped a lot. Food scales are helpful, and the Calorie King little book helps too. Now they also make carb-counting iPhone apps, and those can come in handy also. It is very overwhelming at first, but you do adjust to the new normal. Our biggest long-term challenge is well-meaning older people, familiar with T2, who keep trying to push diet food on our T1. Sigh. We were quite reluctant to move to a pump, but now we are glad we did. After you get over learning how to use it and how to change the infusion sets, it does simplify life. But your doc will probably want you guys to stay with injections for at least six months first.

We bought these, and my math-hating daughter really likes them. She didn't get them all done before the PSAT, but she will definitely finish them before trying the SAT. So they get a thumbs-up from us.

This blew me away. So when I looked into it, they have a MA also. Wow. I wish it was the right time in my life for this! Maybe in a couple of years.

Well, now that you have indeed joined the dark side, I think the best series EVER was Babylon 5. The creator envisioned the entire five-year story arc before the series even began. It's the meatiest, most philosophical, yet most action-packed series I have ever encountered. Try it--you'll like it! :laugh:

Didn't have time to read all the replies, but nope, no sleepovers happening here. No way, no how.

Priceless!

Wear comfortable shoes. Be very prepared for "war of northern aggression" kind of talk and little awareness of Native American issues. But some very interesting things can be learned at those things!

Yes, please add me to the chorus. Loved the mouse-over, didn't realize how much I relied on it, and terribly miss it now.

:iagree::iagree::iagree: Finding out that the "friend" was moving to WA was an unwelcome punch line!

I was great until your punchline, that "friend" is moving to WA. What?!?!?!? Where in WA? We don't want her!

:iagree:

I haven't had time to read the other replies, but what immediately came to mind is that you will have to give up the startie-stoppie checking to get other than startie-stoppie results in the children. I think when you start slavishly checking every single day, they will slavishly follow the schedule/list. Perhaps they have to do it before you will provide breakfast, or dinner, or screen time, or whatever. Both carrot and stick together.

Well, we have one of those. I've always told her that it's BECAUSE it's she's so social that it's good to separate schoolwork from socializing. We get as involved with people/events as we can without collapsing. We try to get involved in things where the whole family can benefit, not just my socialite. We do more than we would prefer, but less than she would prefer. I have told her often that she might elect to handle things differently in her family, and that she will be welcome to do that ; ). We balance things the best we can.

I haven't had time to read the other replies, but I would push audiobooks, especially in the car or during playtime. It would be a way to get good content in without running up against a reading difficulty. I would do that while I was trying to figure out what was going on and trying to remediate.

Second-hand is fine here, but I draw the line at shoes. I have, on occasion, gotten the children a pair of second-hand church shoes or snow boots that were barely worn or unused, but I would never get second-hand shoes for sneakers or something they would wear everyday. Wood furniture would be no problem, but we are picky about condition, unless we *know* we can refinish it. Upholstered furniture would depend heavily on condition, and it can't have smoke/pet smell residue. I probably wouldn't dumpster dive on purpose, but if something was abandoned NEAR a dumpster that seemed perfectly fine, like a piece of wood furniture, I would probably go for it if I really wanted it.

Wow, I'm sorry that your flights were so grueling. You sure didn't need that. We were so sorry to see you go, but we've been so slammed with debate that we haven't had time to dwell on it. But we think about you every day. Just say "Yes, Sir/Ma'am" to everyone, and you'll be good. Children don't generally call adults by first name unless it's "Miss first name." And the funny thing is that you can use "Miss first name" even if the lady is married. The accents do take a while to get used to. Definitely.