CalicoKat Posted February 25, 2008 Share Posted February 25, 2008 dd9 is saying that she's frustrated because her school work is too hard. She's seeing everyone else's work and it's easier than her. She doesn't want to do school. She was a delightful child to be around today until the moment I asked her to put away her playmobil set so we could get started with our day. For the record I did allow her time to play with it (because it's new from her bday), and I was waiting for reason to return to dd 7 (adhd meds had to kick in) before beginning lessons, and I did allow dd9 to make breakfast and listen to her history cd's while she was playing. The instant I asked her to put it away she morphed into a sullen child who had to be told step by step to do things, get out your books, find a pencil, open your math workbook, do you want to listen to the DVD lesson, now that the dvd lesson is over it's time to do your workbook page --- that's when I said enough. I told her that I felt she was playing a game with me in which the rules were that she wasn't going to do anything unless I first told what to do. That game put her in bed for a nap. I told her that school work is her responsibility and that that meant work. This scenario is more frequent and at different times during the day. Need more coffee . . . . please share your BTDT idea and thoughts. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted February 25, 2008 Share Posted February 25, 2008 Sometimes letting them decide which subject to start with (if your schedule allows that) can give them a little bit of "control" over their own school-day. Sometimes I will let them choose from all the subjects. Sometimes it is just "do you want to start with history or math today?" And no, they aren't allowed to say "neither!" Or maybe, "which pretty pencil do you want to choose to do your math with today?" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mcconnellboys Posted February 25, 2008 Share Posted February 25, 2008 Wow! Does she know how lucky she is? I don't allow tv viewing or playing before school time! Why? 'Cause it turns into sullen children who then don't want to do their school work, LOL..... For every person in the world who has greener grass in their yard, there's at LEAST one who has dead grass in their yard. When my children tell me how misused they are, I give them examples of others who are more misused than them. Just ask around amongst those you know, I'm sure you'll find plenty of folks much meaner than you are! Regena Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sue G in PA Posted February 25, 2008 Share Posted February 25, 2008 Her sibling? My dd11 and ds9 do this frequently..."Why do we have to write a WHOLE paragraph by ourselves when ds8 (2nd grade) only has to write one sentence? I simply tell them b/c they are older, more capable, etc. As for not wanting to do work...it's the same around here. I've posted frequently about my ds6 who suddenly fights me about ANY work. I've put away regular curriculum and brought out the colorful workbooks I've collected over the years...nothing. He won't budge. I've stopped fighting him and told him he must do ONE assignment of MY choice each day or no TV, no Video games, no play, no nothing. It seems to work. As for your dd9...if the work isn't too hard (which I doubt it is!) and she's not ill...treat it as a discipline issue. She either does her work or __________(disciplilne of your choice). Sounds like she's playing you, really (JMHO!). My ds9 does this occasionally and once called on it...he usually reverts back to doing his work. You COULD try giving her a break from normal work in lieu of a fun lapbook or unit study for a few weeks. What interests her? Play math games instead of doing the MUS for a while. Do some nature study for Science. Continue letting her listen to history CD's for History. Do a lapbook (that would be writing, too, b/c you do have to write in them!). Read lots of books together. Giving her a break also gives YOU a break from the constant arguing over school. Just my humble 2 cents! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jodi-FL Posted February 25, 2008 Share Posted February 25, 2008 my 9yo son is sullen about everything these days, and it helps to give him some control (like the suggestion of what to do first) but unfortunately, with 7 kids, I can't always give him that kind of control. For this kid of mine, it helps to give him a checklist and tell him everything on the list is a non-negotiable. and if he wants to eat lunch, then he has to get ______(fill in the blank to whatever is your top priority, for me it's just Bible and Math today) before he eats. then I find time for a little one-on-one with him to find out what he's really bothered by. lately it's been his feeling of a lack of friends (this is an old man child in a 9yo body, and he really wants friends, but the boys his age are immature, so he really does have a dilemma. fortunately, his 11yo sister is his best friend). hang in there, this too shall pass Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soph the vet Posted February 25, 2008 Share Posted February 25, 2008 My dd9 is occassionally sullen if I have let her goof around before school. Usually we get right to work with math. Ds7 has the bigger attitude issue manifested as groaning, frowns, throwing a pencil, etc. He gets to stand facing the corner until attitude changes which can seconds to many minutes and even then he does not come skipping happily back to the table. Having a goal for the day or a small incentive helps. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CalicoKat Posted February 25, 2008 Author Share Posted February 25, 2008 Her sibling? My dd11 and ds9 do this frequently..."Why do we have to write a WHOLE paragraph by ourselves when ds8 (2nd grade) only has to write one sentence? I simply tell them b/c they are older, more capable, etc. As for not wanting to do work...it's the same around here. I've posted frequently about my ds6 who suddenly fights me about ANY work. I've put away regular curriculum and brought out the colorful workbooks I've collected over the years...nothing. He won't budge. I've stopped fighting him and told him he must do ONE assignment of MY choice each day or no TV, no Video games, no play, no nothing. It seems to work. As for your dd9...if the work isn't too hard (which I doubt it is!) and she's not ill...treat it as a discipline issue. She either does her work or __________(disciplilne of your choice). Sounds like she's playing you, really (JMHO!). My ds9 does this occasionally and once called on it...he usually reverts back to doing his work. You COULD try giving her a break from normal work in lieu of a fun lapbook or unit study for a few weeks. What interests her? Play math games instead of doing the MUS for a while. Do some nature study for Science. Continue letting her listen to history CD's for History. Do a lapbook (that would be writing, too, b/c you do have to write in them!). Read lots of books together. Giving her a break also gives YOU a break from the constant arguing over school. Just my humble 2 cents! I did that last week and let her to a Draw Write Now for handwriting and she spent hours with her SOTW drawing/coloring. I think she wanted to do that again this week- but it's time to make progress on the meat & potatoes of homeschooling. I do think she's playing me. She's comparing herself to her 7 yo sister and 4 yo brother who are both in Kindergarten this year. (I don't know how to do a lapbook.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CalicoKat Posted February 25, 2008 Author Share Posted February 25, 2008 Wow! Does she know how lucky she is? I don't allow tv viewing or playing before school time! Why? 'Cause it turns into sullen children who then don't want to do their school work, LOL..... For every person in the world who has greener grass in their yard, there's at LEAST one who has dead grass in their yard. When my children tell me how misused they are, I give them examples of others who are more misused than them. Just ask around amongst those you know, I'm sure you'll find plenty of folks much meaner than you are! Regena house showing we did this weekend (5). Usually there's no playing, no electronics, no fun until the work is done. . . . we're going back to that tomorrow. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Holly IN Posted February 25, 2008 Share Posted February 25, 2008 going through this right now with all of my kids....No advice but in the same boat as you are. :) My dh and I are going to talk about how we are going to beef up consequences of their behaviors. Public school is not an option for us. I am enjoying all the replies you are getting. Thanks for bringing this issue up. I really blew my top today with the kids. Tears on everybody's part. Hopefully all of us will have better days the rest of this week.:D Holly Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joanne Posted February 25, 2008 Share Posted February 25, 2008 Is this chronic? Or occassional? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mcconnellboys Posted February 26, 2008 Share Posted February 26, 2008 Yes, I can see that. I would have made an exception in that case, too. Maybe she is just feeling short-changed because of the busy things you have going on in your lives right now....? And sometimes schedules being thrown all out of kilter can cause grumpiness, too...so maybe it's just that you have so much going on right now.... Regena Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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