Special needs switch?

[amo_mea_filiis.]

I didn’t know what else to title this. Lol

 

My 13yo has autism, adhd, a borderline IQ, and very likely dyslexia. He’s in a public cyber school and still qualifies for speech.

 

Functionally, depending on the day, he can look like a perfectly normal 13yo going out around town, playing video games, etc. While other days he’s flappy, avoidant, and just looks like a non typical teen. I realize fluctuations are normal, but the degree we deal with goes with his special needs.

 

So, he has virtual speech 3x a week. I consider speech to be the backbone of his educational needs. If he does nothing but speech in a week, it’s still progress! He’s had the same SLP since May 2016 (so very end of 5th, all of 6th, and now 1/2 way through 7th).

 

Tuesdays I understand any behavior out of him; it’s a 45 minute writing lesson (it’s actually supposed to be 30 academic minutes with a 15 minute transition time. But he had been cooperating for about 40/45 since September).

 

Wednesday and Thursday is a 30 minute speech session. The format is consistent. His session goals are presented right at the start. Anything new is introduced in EXTREMELY small pieces, usually with funny videos, because new challenges will cause him to take off.

 

5th and 6th were incredibly hard with behavior and getting him to attend. The reason we kept virtual was because he didn’t give her any inappropriate behaviors (he refused, but never cursed at her, never uses wiener or fart jokes, etc).

 

September of 7th rolls around and he’s amazing for her. He’s getting work done, making progress on goals, getting in on time, and just doing what’s expected of him.

 

I want to say it has gotten harder to get him in, but once I get the headset on him, he did well. He transitioned back from winter break as well.

 

In the last 2 weeks though, the switch flipped again and he’s being ridiculous. Still not inappropriate towards the SLP, but everything else is back.

 

He does not respond to traditional rewards and punishments. So earning something for good, or losing something for bad backfires. I have a BCBA who has been with us for 2 years to verify this.

 

I don’t even know if I have a specific question here. Lol. Just help me talk through this. We’re 1/2 way through the year and he was doing well. He was even attending math! I honestly don’t know what changed.

[displace]

Maybe the transition from winter break was seamless at first but now there’s resistance manifesting as behaviors?

 

Illness can always be a possibility (upcoming), or other changes in routine (meals, sleep, etc). Maybe it’s a slight Seasonal Affective Disorder if you’re staying inside a lot and not getting sun and vitamin D. Maybe other nutrition concerns. Idk?

[TheReader]

In addition to the above suggestions....

 

...growth spurt? 

 

...puberty?

 

...delayed reaction to the transition?

 

....other work getting harder, making him act out in speech (where he feels comfortable)?

 

...any sleep or diet changes? 

 

...new game? TV show? something else that might be affecting him? 

 

In other words....it sounds within the realm of normal to me, based on limited experience, but I'd look for the underlying cause and address that if possible. If none of the above, perhaps a physical exam to rule out illness or something. 

[amo_mea_filiis.]

Other work has gotten easier or remained the same.

 

Delayed transition issue is probably the biggest.

 

Winter blues is a good reason. No sun, but his D is good (we supplement high and watch numbers).

 

Nutrition. Big one. He’s been refusing most foods and living on ham and cheese sandwiches. Though they do have lettuce and tomato, which is better than some of his other refusal periods.

 

Not likely growth spurt, but probably gearing up for a spring one. His size 11 shoes are starting to get tight; and he pretty much jumped from boy’s 6 to men’s 10 in a blink last year.

 

Current game obsession is happening; but if speech if done, he knows I’ll leave him to his game.

 

We still don’t have his math curriculum, so I’ve been allowing some crappy math behavior.

[amo_mea_filiis.]

Thanks. :)

 

Sometimes just posting helps.

[PeterPan]

It's winter. Maybe his vitamin D levels dropped. We just did genetics on my ds, and turns out he has a defective VDR (vitamin D receptor) gene. Vitamin D pulls the methyls off B12 and is part of the methylation cycle, meaning it affects dopamine levels. As D goes down, methyls go up, which makes my ds more aggressive. Also, vitamin D affects tryptophan which then affects serotonin levels.

 

Maybe your ped could run a vitamin D test? It's super cheap just to take and see what happens. I also give my ds niacin. It tamps down the methyl levels and chills that really edgy, volatile behavior and makes him MUCH easier to work with. 

[amo_mea_filiis.]

The weather has seriously sucked. I’m sure that messes things up too.

[Innisfree]

You have my sympathy. I've got a 13yo with ASD, too, and our year is not exactly going great.

 

Last (academic) year we had this down, or at least it feels like that in retrospect. We were using the Time Timer for things like math or language. Dd would set it for 45 minutes or an hour, settle down to her lesson and *get it done*. Any extra time was hers as a break. She had the system nailed. It wasn't always that perfect, but pretty consistent for a while.

 

This year? Well, she just crawled back into bed, after spending ten minutes silent with her head down on her arms at the table, because finding a common factor for 18 and 24 was overwhelming her. She's probably done for the day.

 

So, my positive take on it is that nothing got torn up, pushed, etc. A few years ago it would have been.

 

But academic progress is not exactly roaring along here. I've been blaming it on the age. But yes, winter blahs could be a factor, too.

 

So, sending hugs. 'Fraid I just ate the chocolate.

Edited January 24, 2018 by Innisfree

[amo_mea_filiis.]

The sock thread made me think of this connection...

 

All of his socks have holes, and the old man morning walk down the stairs is pronounced. So I’m thinking he tightened back up. That always messes with him.

 

Since this is fixable, I’m going to take him for an eval and get some numbers.

[Tap]

Most likely is is related to the analogy of filling a vase with rocks, pebbles and sand (or any variation of this analogy).  There is only so much capacity people have for dealing with life. This analogy is commonly used to illustrate keeping a balance in your life and maintaining priorities. For other people  it can be used to illustrate how the little almost invisible struggles in life (the sand) can cause normal day activities (the rocks) to become impossible tasks because too much of their mental energy went into basic life skills that day. 

 

 

Maybe you aren't able to see what is taking up his mental energy, but it appears you can see the ripple effect it has created on the rest of his life. A key to moving forward to success is going to be figuring out what he is using his mental energy on right now.  It could be a growth spurt, it could be a new interest in a different topic, it could be that something is spinning in his head  and he can't let go of it, it could be lack of sleep, it could be an uncomfortable feeling in his body, it could be a self-perception issue, it could be that the topic last month was one that was easy for him to learn and thus didn't take as much energy. 

 

I think one of the hard things with autism, is that they often can't communicate what is taking their mental energy.  It could be a hole in a sock, or a new light bulb that is buzzing, or his blood sugar is fluctuating, or the dog smells more because he is wet when he comes inside.   All of those little things that most people notice and are able to move on from, are those thing that fill the autistic person's vase with sand in the first half of the day and then there is no mental energy left to do a lesson....or leads to flapping or mental shut down by noon. 

 

I would look at specifically what he is doing from the time he wakes up, until lesson time. Look at every second of the morning, maybe do a storyboard with him to see if he will point out the problem areas.  For some kids story boards are a golden ticket into thier mind, for others it is just another hurdle.

 

If he is really into music, maybe ask if there is a song that reflects what he feels.  Or work with Google images to do some big problem/small problem work.  For instance find a picture of a foot in a sock with a hole in it, and someone eating breakfast at the table, and someone sitting at a computer, and a picture of headphones on a head...etc. Print a bunch of pictures of things he encounters every morning.  Print each pix in small, medium, big and let him tell you how each rates.  This may give you clues to what is important and not important in his life. 

 

 

 

For dd11, she has to have physical activity that is hard enough to make her sweat at least a few times per week.  She needs her morning routine to be the same each day. It is a hard time of day for her, so the predictability of each step reduces her stress.  it is scripted to the point that she eats 3 eggs, sausage, smoothie, watchs Netflix while she eats, get dressed in a specific order, then brushes her hair, then her teeth, then puts on her socks, shoes, sweatshirt.....everything is in the exact same order every day.  I know better than to say "your breakfast isn't ready yet, why don't you get dressed first".  It will completely shut her down if I do,  I also can not rush her.  If I  do, she will freeze like an ice cube (her version of flapping) and it will take longer to get back to moving, than if I just let her go at her own pace. The only control I have, is giving her a time prompt at the same time each day.  Her morning prompt is 730.  I have an alarm on my phone and tell her the time when it goes off. She can self adjust most of the time to make sure she is already eating her breakfast by 730. She can make herself hustle, but she won't hustle for other people.  She also can have zero down time in the morning or she will go on a side tangent and it is soooo very hard to bring her back to her morning routine.  I am serious when I say, I have to keep her 100% occupied with her routine to get her on the bus, or she will take at least 5 minutes to transition back to her routine.  Keeping her in motion on  single goal is vital to making her morning go smooth.

 

For my daughter over stimulation is a big problem.  On rocky mornings she will cry when I brush her hair.  How sensitive her scalp is, is directly related to how much sensory input she can take.  The only way to increase her sensory threshold when she is super sensitive, is to get her hard physical exercise.  Or to overwhelm her brain with happy chemicals, so making her laugh really hard can get her up and over being super sensitive helps too.  

 

I don't like it but she takes a small blanket on the bus with her.  it helps her to keep from getting overstimulated on the bus.  It is calming to her and so we allow it, but it has minimal effect on the rest of her day. Some things help in the moment like the blanket, somethings help longer like getting exercise.  If she doesn't want to exercise, I will make up tasks for her to help me with that require some muscles.  Like moving all the heavy dining room chairs and vacuuming the floor.   She uses noise canceling headphones for loud things like vacuuming, to block the sound, but over the years, is able to do more and more without them.

 

Sometimes with kids like ours, it is a transition issue.  They are struggling to transition from one person to another or from one place to another.  DD will throw a tantrum every Sunday night that she sees her bio-dad.  SHe Only targets me with this behavior, because it is an attachment transition to me from him. I know what the problem is (pretty clear since I am the target).....I am still working to find a solution. 

It so hard when you see them backslide from something they were achieving.  I try to remember that it just means her brain is learning something new and that she will come back to this goal on another day.  Then then the next time she tries to achieve the goal, she already has a few strategies that she knows works and can add on to them.  Everything isn't lost, it is just set aside to master another day.

Edited January 25, 2018 by Tap

[PeterPan]

VitaFusion Vitamin D3 2000 IU Gummy Vitamins, 75 ct - Walmart.com They're a little squishy for texture, but my ds will eat them.

[amo_mea_filiis.]

VitaFusion Vitamin D3 2000 IU Gummy Vitamins, 75 ct - Walmart.com They're a little squishy for texture, but my ds will eat them.

He takes about 5,000iu daily and his levels hang between 50 and 70.

[PeterPan]

Interesting! That's what I'm wanting to do next is D testing on my ds. How does your ds do with the blood draws? Sorry for that total rabbit trail. I can order the labs online myself and go to an adult lab, or I can go to the ped (who surely would do it, mercy) and use the children's lab.

 

I sort of want him to have that experience of doing blood, getting that anxiety and unfamiliarity out of the way. I just wasn't sure if the lab would make much of a difference. There will be a cost difference, sigh, with the ped being more expensive, so that was my hesitation. Was your ds pretty chilled about it?

[amo_mea_filiis.]

Mine has always been good with labs. I stopped holding him at 2, and had to convince lab techs to stop waiting for two people. He didn’t flinch.

 

At 6 he had dental surgery, and asked the nurse why he waiting to start the IV. Nurse was shocked, came over, and had the easiest start of his day.

 

My dd, on the other hand, had to be held full body until she was 12 (hit by a car, dislocated and broke her shoulder, so I couldn’t hold the same way anymore). After that I started asking for matter-of-fact techs. Sit down, zip it, don’t move, and don’t count her. Just stick and be done.

[PeterPan]

That's really helpful. I remember being restrained for shots as very young child (early preschool age, 3-4 probably). You're right though that so far with dental he has been very matter of fact. He might actually be ok, hmm.