Thinking about taking dd w/IEP out of charter school, lots of questions

[fourcatmom]

My kids have been with our charter school for the past 6 years since I pulled them out of public school. I have two daughters, one going into 9th and one into 10th. I am considering pulling them both from the charter school but would do so for my 9th now and my 10th after the 1st of the year.

 

A little background info...my dd was injured riding a horse about 20 month ago but has been struggling for the past several years due to some medical issues which are just getting figured out. She will more then likely be having brain surgery this month. She will have a long recovery and possibily go into a pain program after that. The hospital is about 3 hours from us. She was placed on an IEP last November follwing neuropysch testing and she has only been released to do 7.5 hours of school a week but she is not even close to meeting that. I am waiting to see if the neurosurgeon will take her out of school again completely. She has access to a computer, counseling and some academic support though the charter school but most of the time even getting her there is an issue so we really don't access to much of the services. I feell like i am failing every time I speak with them because is not doing what they think she should be doing. At this point her academic roster really consists of Math, English and dance. She had to stop the dance because she physically couldn't do it anymore. Everytime i push school, she ends up complety distraught and loosses more confidence because it feels like she just can't do it. On the other hand, she is doing other things, like a lot of research about her condition, medications and treatments. She also really likes to watch make up videos and will often practice on her hands while she is laying down. She also likes to help cook when she feels well enough and will watch videos before trying. So it would be incorporating things like math, science and history through these activities that she can do right now. She is on an extended year schedule so she should be doing what is on her rooster right now.

 

I feel like if I go private with her that she might have a different outlook on school but I don't know how to make it all work. I am not wanting her to "unschool" but she just needs a different path right now as we tredge through these medical issues. If she were in the pain program, they do offer school and therapy and the charter school already said they didn't think they could count that she "their school". I don't want the charter getting in the way of particiapting in the pain program and I think they would disenroll her and put her in the home/hospital program which would mean she would be assinged a teacher from our local public school. If they are going to do that, I feel like it's a better option to just go private.

 

I am guessing I would loose her IEP as I wouldn't need it? Counseling and testing (if needed) can be done through medical so I don't feell like she would be loosing anything. The biggest issue for me is that she is loosing confidence and it is adding to her stress and anxiety. I feel like if she is not ready to start school at the end of the month, which I am pretty sure she wont be then she will not graduate on time and school is just becoming all the things she can't do. I want her school to be focused on what she can do and grow from there.

 

Can I legally do this kind of school with her?

 

Any help, websites, etc would be helpful...I have never thought of going private before. I also think my 10th grader would blossom this way but right now she is involved in their writing program as a mentor and I want her to be able to complete that course before I make any decisions with her.

 

TIA!

Edited August 6, 2016 by fourcatmom

[OneStepAtATime]

:grouphug:  :grouphug:  :grouphug:

 

I'm guessing that this will really depend on the laws of your state but from where I am sitting, no you don't have to lose the IEP.  You just keep documenting the accommodations you are providing at home.  

 

Honestly, I would absolutely pull her.  If she shows interest in something, support her and let her run with it as much as she is able.  SHE DOES NOT HAVE TO GRADUATE IN A STANDARD TIME FRAME.  The public/charter school scheduling system is based on arbitrarily assigned grade levels/age levels to keep a large number of students moving through a very complex and enormous institution.  It does not recognize the individual's needs.  That system is not going to fit your daughter's needs right now.  Pull her.  Give her as much time as she needs to get through surgery/healing/etc.  

 

Are you in a state that requires reporting?

[fourcatmom]

:grouphug:  :grouphug:  :grouphug:

 

I'm guessing that this will really depend on the laws of your state but from where I am sitting, no you don't have to lose the IEP.  You just keep documenting the accommodations you are providing at home.  

 

Honestly, I would absolutely pull her.  If she shows interest in something, support her and let her run with it as much as she is able.  SHE DOES NOT HAVE TO GRADUATE IN A STANDARD TIME FRAME.  The public/charter school scheduling system is based on arbitrarily assigned grade levels/age levels to keep a large number of students moving through a very complex and enormous institution.  It does not recognize the individual's needs.  That system is not going to fit your daughter's needs right now.  Pull her.  Give her as much time as she needs to get through surgery/healing/etc.  

 

Are you in a state that requires reporting?

Oh my gosh, thank you. I feel like this is what my heart is telling me I need to do.

 

We are in California. I was told I would not have to file privately until October so I guess I would just unenroll her now since she is on an extended year and then just ask for her records and start keeping track of things.

 

Honestly, it is adding so much stress to both of us because I keep thinking she has to have the surgery now so that she can be "healed" by September and it's just putting unnecessary stress on both of us.

 

She was taken off school last May so technically she has already missed about 14 months of school.

Edited August 6, 2016 by fourcatmom

[OneStepAtATime]

Although you have probably already read these, in case you haven't, maybe these would help a bit with understanding your situation and what to do now?

 

https://www.hslda.org/strugglinglearner/sn_questions.asp

 

http://www.hsc.org/pulling-your-child-out-of-school.html

 

http://www2.ed.gov/about/offices/list/oii/nonpublic/california.html

 

:grouphug:  :grouphug:  :grouphug:

 

I know it seems scary to not have the implied safety net of the charter school but honestly in this instance it sounds like they are going to cause more stress and anxiety than any sort of help and may genuinely hinder her recovery.  Is there a support group near you for parents of kids with medical conditions that are interfering with their ability to function academically?

[Kanin]

I definitely agree with OneStep, she does not have to graduate "on time"!  From what you say, it sounds like your daughter is very interested in medical things, and is good at gathering information and enjoys it... that is a great skill. Maybe she could start learning a little about the history of education here & around the world... she might start to feel more in control of her education, and feel good about completing her schooling on her own timetable.

 

I don't know why, but your post made me thing of a GREAT book I read last year. It's called "The Smartest Kids in the World: And How They Got That Way" by Amanda Ripley. It follows three highschoolers who each spend a year in Finland, South Korea, and Poland. It's really fascinating, and it also talks about the struggles of the American public school system. If I were a kid on a rather unconventional path, I might feel comforted by knowing that American public education is all screwed up anyway  :P You would probably like this book too... it's awesome!  One of the comforting takeaways is that it doesn't matter how well off or wealthy a family is, a child from a family like that can still struggle with education. Those with challenges are often surprising with their success.

 

Anyway - that book just popped into my head. Good luck with your daughter, it sounds like the school is causing more stress than it is worth!  

 

https://www.amazon.com/Smartest-Kids-World-They-That/dp/145165443X

[fourcatmom]

I definitely agree with OneStep, she does not have to graduate "on time"!  From what you say, it sounds like your daughter is very interested in medical things, and is good at gathering information and enjoys it... that is a great skill. Maybe she could start learning a little about the history of education here & around the world... she might start to feel more in control of her education, and feel good about completing her schooling on her own timetable.

 

I don't know why, but your post made me thing of a GREAT book I read last year. It's called "The Smartest Kids in the World: And How They Got That Way" by Amanda Ripley. It follows three highschoolers who each spend a year in Finland, South Korea, and Poland. It's really fascinating, and it also talks about the struggles of the American public school system. If I were a kid on a rather unconventional path, I might feel comforted by knowing that American public education is all screwed up anyway  :p You would probably like this book too... it's awesome!  One of the comforting takeaways is that it doesn't matter how well off or wealthy a family is, a child from a family like that can still struggle with education. Those with challenges are often surprising with their success.

 

Anyway - that book just popped into my head. Good luck with your daughter, it sounds like the school is causing more stress than it is worth!  

 

https://www.amazon.com/Smartest-Kids-World-They-That/dp/145165443X

 

Thank you. I will order it on my kindle. She is not so much interested in medical but she is trying to take control and understand her situation. She doesn't want things done to her, she wants to be part of the process, including decisions about which medications to try and so on. Decisions about surgery were equally in her power and she did a lot of research learning about what they would do, having conversations with the doctor and so on.This is isn't something typical kids have to do but I don't see why it doesn't count as education. She is learning. Its real life learning.

Edited August 6, 2016 by fourcatmom

[OneStepAtATime]

Thank you. I will order it on my kindle. She is not so much interested in medical but she is trying to take control and understand her situation. She doesn't want things done to her, she wants to be part of the process, including decisions about which medications to try and so on. Decisions about surgery were equally in her power and she did a lot of research learning about what they would do, having conversations with the doctor and so on.This is isn't something typical kids have to do but I don't see why it doesn't count as education. She is learning. Its real life learning.

YES!  She IS learning.  And probably in a far more effective and profound way than just memorizing a bunch of stuff from a textbook.  She is definitely learning.  Walk away from the cookie cutter mentality that learning HAS to be in a structured school system with everyone else's education looking the same as your own.  Walk away.  Give her a chance to follow a better path FOR HER.  Put her own specific needs at the forefront. 

[fourcatmom]

YES!  She IS learning.  And probably in a far more effective and profound way than just memorizing a bunch of stuff from a textbook.  She is definitely learning.  Walk away from the cookie cutter mentality that learning HAS to be in a structured school system with everyone else's education looking the same as your own.  Walk away.  Give her a chance to follow a better path FOR HER.  Put her own specific needs at the forefront. 

 

Your going to make me cry. It's been a long time coming, I think I have been so consumed by all the medical in the past year that I just kept going with the school because I was overwhelmed but I am tired of feeling down and I know she is to. I am tired of explaining and justifying and feeling anxious.

 

Thank you. I needed to hear these things. My heart was already leaning there but my head needed it too!

[OneStepAtATime]

Your going to make me cry. It's been a long time coming, I think I have been so consumed by all the medical in the past year that I just kept going with the school because I was overwhelmed but I am tired of feeling down and I know she is to. I am tired of explaining and justifying and feeling anxious.

 

Thank you. I needed to hear these things. My heart was already leaning there but my head needed it too!

:grouphug:  :grouphug:  :grouphug:

 

Huge hugs.  Lots of hugs.  I am showering you with hugs and encouragement.  You can do this.  Do what your heart is telling you is best for your daughter.  

[Kat w]

I am so sorry o hear of this for your family. What a hard position to be in.

 

I only read the first few lines of what one-step said, I would ABSOLUTELY pull her out.

Don't feel bad about that not even being on your radar right now. You have a sweetpea to get healthy again :)

Hugs and prayers

[kbutton]

I agree with others and am glad to hear more about how your situation is working out. 

 

I do have a question--when you say private, is that an "all homeschools in CA are private schools" thing? I just want to be sure I am understanding.

 

But yes, you can make this work. You don't really lose an IEP--you will have to go back to the school each year to keep it up-to-date. Do not fail to do that because it's your protection.

 

You can use some of what she's doing as creative electives--maybe you can make up a "syllabus" together with her for a cosmetology class that would be elective or be part of art, for instance. 

 

You might want to put some CA homeschooling with medical issues questions out there for specifics when you are ready to take it in, but it should be something you can do. You just need the information on how to feel confident about your choice.

 

Please keep us posted on her surgery results. I really hope it does the trick! 

[Citrusheights5]

I will answer, that yes all homeschool are private schools in CA.

 

Secondly I would recommend, endorse and full encourage you to pull this DD from the charter. They are just not equipped to deal with anything to far outside of the norm despite offering "services". Because of their nature you must submit and agree to a minimum Standard for them to receive funding as a public school. Because of this they can only budge so much.

 

I know, with my son we hit a wall, where what he could do and what they expected was too far, and we had to break away. We are returning this year because at this grade level he can submit typed wok, hence meeting their criteria. Anyways, when you tell them you can simply tell the charter you plan to homeschool independently, under the affidavit and that will suffice for notification. You can also request the educational file or simply ask them to send it to the district office. I never requested it, but I've always done elementary not high school, so I think it would be best to request it.

 

Best of luck to you!

[PeterPan]

Just having followed your saga a bit, I'm glad you're making this move to follow your gut and your heart here.  These are hard things, but I think launching out like this will let her continue to heal and to focus her energy on learning the things that are really important to her right now.  It sounds like she's definitely doing good things with her time!  

 

As far as the IEP, like Kbutton says I would continue to renew it simply so you don't have a hassle later if you need it again for whatever reason.  Having an IEP as a homeschooler in our state is pretty normal because we have a disability scholarship program.  Even if your state doesn't do that, it's just good protection for her and efficient for you to keep it and renew it as long as they will.

 

I hope your changes go really well!  Listen to your gut on this.  You can only do what fits her, and YOU are the person closest to her and therefore the person most likely to know what that is.

[fourcatmom]

So I have been preoccupied with medical stuff going on and was never able to withdrawal her. Today is the first offical day of school with the charter. I spoke with the IEP coordinator and they are moving her to a home and hospital program. So, I told her I would be withdrawaling her tomorrow. They didn't seem to mind, none of the things that I was worried about happened, she seemed to understand. So now we start on a new adventure.

[PeterPan]

I'm glad it was so smooth!

[OneStepAtATime]

Glad there was no fussing on their part.  I will be keeping you and your family in my thoughts as you begin this new segment of your journey.  Hugs and best wishes.  And thanks for the update.

[displace]

Good luck and I hope things go smoothly!

[OneStepAtATime]

Thinking of you and your family today. Hope things are going well.