StaceyinLA Posted February 2, 2016 Share Posted February 2, 2016 (edited) He still should not have been imprisoned in Iran. Separate issue. Oh I totally agree with that. I said the cynic in me. There's a big part of me that prayed a lot for his release. It's just disappointing when someone isn't what they seem. Edited February 2, 2016 by StaceyinLA Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted February 2, 2016 Share Posted February 2, 2016 I guess "cynic" is now code for "mean"? He did not deserve to be imprisoned. None of the men deserved that. It sounds like a judge and jury found him deserving of a fine (if I read the link correctly) but that is an entirely separate issue. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StaceyinLA Posted February 2, 2016 Share Posted February 2, 2016 (edited) I guess "cynic" is now code for "mean"? He did not deserve to be imprisoned. None of the men deserved that. It sounds like a judge and jury found him deserving of a fine (if I read the link correctly) but that is an entirely separate issue. No it isn't. There is a disappointment factor when you find out that someone isn't what they seem. I prayed for this man's release. I am glad he was released. There is still a part of me that's sad he isn't who people thought he was. Edited February 2, 2016 by StaceyinLA 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted February 2, 2016 Share Posted February 2, 2016 No it isn't. There is a disappointment factor when you find out that someone isn't what they seem. I prayed for this man's release. I am glad he was released. There is still a part of me that's sad he isn't who people thought he was. Yes, I'm sad about that too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted February 2, 2016 Share Posted February 2, 2016 I had no knowledge of this man or his wife prior to this thread. If I had I probably would NOT have suggested she has a boyfriend. It sounds like he really is abusive and that is why she has gone public. So again I am sorry I offended. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GinaPagnato Posted February 2, 2016 Share Posted February 2, 2016 (edited) I have a friend who left an abusive spouse. The thing she was told in counseling was that she should feel free to tell anyone why she was leaving. She did not need to protect him and the more honest she was, the more likely she was to find the support she needed within her community. I think it was a bit easier for her to stick to her decision because she had that support. I don't fault her at all for being honest about why she wasn't reuniting with him. She didn't give any details, just stated the basic fact that the relationship was abusive and she was taking care of herself and her kids. I wish her the best. I agree completely that an abuser doesn't deserve "protection" against the revelation of their heinous behavior. My thoughts always go right to the kids. She did mention that he was sexually abusive through a pornography addiction. I'm imagining my kids hearing from all their friends that their dad was physically and verbally abusive, and a porn addict. I *hope* the kids are insulated from these revelations, but I'm not sure that's possible once it's on the web. I imagine she felt responsible to be honest with the many people who had supported her efforts to free her husband, and who would obviously be shocked that they weren't together. She was in a corner, really. Unfortunately, I have several friends who've had to leave abusive spouses, so I get the importance of exposure. Family, friends, church, immediate community should all be aware so the victim(s) of abuse receive support and the perpetrator can't continue with impunity. In this case, I just shudder at it being so public, but again, her situation is unique. Edited February 2, 2016 by forgetmenot Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Anne in CA Posted February 2, 2016 Share Posted February 2, 2016 Well, I don't know how unique it really is. Lots of people abuse and lots of people view porn, keeping it secret still allows them to continue their bad behavior. It is awful that his children will be exposed to the knowledge of who he really is... but HE is the one who did that, not his wife. She tried to keep the family together, he insisted on clinging to his sin. Also, kids always know more than parents think. They may have known anyway. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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