When your teens are applying for scholarships etc

[38carrots]

and are required to write an essay, to what extent is it acceptable to help them?

 

When I had to write admission / scholarship essays, I had DH look over them. When I was a graduate student and volunteered at the university writing center, I helped undergrads with their admission essays.

 

I wouldn't submit anything myself without having at least a couple of people look over my stuff, and if they have suggestions or edits, I'd consider them.

 

So why do I feel awkward providing the same assistance to my teen who needs to write a scolarship essay? To what extents do you help your teens?

 

 

[Okra]

I think proofreading is perfectly fine.  The ideas words should be their own.

[cjzimmer1]

I don't have a good answer to this either.  My DS has 6 essays to write before the first of February (on top of his regular school work).  He is a black and white formulatic straight to the point kid.  These personal essay are killing him. I'm trying to offer advice and pointers of things he could write about but his longest "essay" is currently 172 words.  I don't even know how to help him at this point.

[Tsuga]

I don't have a good answer to this either.  My DS has 6 essays to write before the first of February (on top of his regular school work).  He is a black and white formulatic straight to the point kid.  These personal essay are killing him. I'm trying to offer advice and pointers of things he could write about but his longest "essay" is currently 172 words.  I don't even know how to help him at this point.

 

The fact is that some people just won't get scholarships because of the way they are set up. I know I didn't get much in spite of achieving a lot. It was frustrating. "What do you want me to do, I'll do anything, but don't ask me to read your mind, is this a mind-reading scholarship?!?!" Drove me insane. 

 

My advice to my past self is to take on a different character and write as that person. "Pretend you are writing an essay telling me about your friend." Then switch all the relevant facts to himself. 

 

And how good can any of these essays by future engineers and musicians and doctors even be? Some of them won't be able to write a note by the end of their careers! It's just such a bizarre way to filter people out.

[dirty ethel rackham]

For my kids for whom personal writing is agony, I had to sit with them and talk with them about the topic so that they would be able to brainstorm.  When they said something that sounded promising, I had them write it down.  (With the second child, I had them record our conversation so that they would have a more accurate record of what they said.)  I asked them questions to help them get a framework in their heads about how they wanted to present their essay.  Then, I had them do it.  I ended up having them send a copy to a family friend (fellow homeschooling parent who teaches writing classes) for critique and she offered suggestions (asking questions for clarification, giving feedback on how some things came across.) 

[Starr]

Parents across the country pay tutors to help with admission essays. Put on your tutor hat.

[Joyofsixreboot]

I think proofreading is perfectly fine. The ideas words should be their own.

This has been our plan. I might suggest a better wording, double check for mistakes but the idea and thrust was theirs.

[JFSinIL]

I proofread, and point out grammar errors, typos, and help a kid rephrase things to avoid redundancy etc.  I ask the kid to read their essay out loud to me - they often catch stuff themselves when they have to say the words.  Then I have them re-speak the awkward sentence (etc.) until they are saying what they mean to say...then they tweak the written words to match.