Talk me into homeschooling High School

[aelgraham]

Okay, the next few months will be decision time. I have homeschooled my DS all along and now we're approaching High School. I'm the type of person who likes to focus on what I'm doing at the time, so I've purposely avoided conversations about transcripts, AP classes, college entrance, etc.

 

So now I am asking, "Can I really do this??"

 

On one hand my son seems ready to expand his horizons. There is a new charter school that I'll be looking into which seems like a good fit for him. Sometimes I think he's outgrown being "stuck home" with his mom and sister.

 

On the other hand, I am giving him a really good education at home and I'm willing to keep going. He's getting past that angst-y pre-teen phase and is becoming enjoyable again. I think it could be an interesting challenge and great experience to teach and coach him through High School.

 

So... those of you who are doing it, or have done it... how hard is it? What challenges did you have? Do you think that you gave your son or daughter the education you wanted for them? Did they go on to college?

 

Any advice or input would be appreciated!

 

Thanks!

[Miss Marple]

For me, the high school years were the dessert of homeschooling. I truly enjoyed those years more than any others - well, actually starting around grade 8. We had wonderful philosophical discussions about literature, history, science, homeschooling :) , religion, etc. It was a conversation rather than "telling them". It helped me understand what they were thinking and how to help them navigate their world.

 

However, at that time we also began a bit of outsourcing. That really helped the boys who started enjoying a little competition among other kids. Eventually we moved to taking some concurrent (dual enrollment) courses at the local university. It has all led to a gradual move into "institutional" education.

 

All my boys have gone to college. My oldest graduated this past May and has a job, DS2 is currently a sophomore in college (majoring in mechanical engineering with a pre-med option), DS3 is a senior, DS4 is a junior (both high school sons are dual enrolled). It has been a positive experience and the boys are pleased as well. It isn't without pitfalls - you have to be motivated and organized and learn a balance between hand-holding and making them do things more independently. But it's really just another extension of child-rearing, IMO.

 

I never considered it hard - probably because I was committed to it. Sure there were good and bad days/seasons. But overall, it was positive. One thing that I noticed is that I seemed to set the tone of the school day. If I were unenthusiastic or irritable or lazy, the boys would pick up on that. So it was hard, sometimes, to always be positive and happy esp. when dealing with other life issues (elderly inlaws, etc.).

[2boysmom]

I've also enjoyed homeschooling in hs. We are into our 2nd year with my eldest, and I'm so thankful for this time.

I think your son really needs to want to homeschool as well. As long as you provide enough outside activities, opportunities for friends, and perhaps some outsouring (we do live classes with Potter's School), I think it shouldn't be a problem. I love the freedom we continue to have while homeschooling high school.

[Starr]

Home schooling high school is once again looking at school differently. It sounds like you could do it well. We found a combination of home and outsourcing works best as they get older. Living in a college town they have opportunities of auditing classes. All that said I feel we could have done a better job but dd is in her second year of college and doing very well.

[elegantlion]

Ds is in 9th grade, we've homeschooled since 1st grade. High school is harder, but if you've been successful so far, why stop? I would never try to convince someone to homeschool high school, or homeschool in general, however.

 

For us homeschooling works. We're in a rural area, ds has quirky interests in study that could not be met in the public school. He's much more interesting in conversation and thinking this year, I'm enjoying him in the classroom. I have certain beliefs about the teen years that don't mess with the reality of a brick and mortar school (public or private). Dh is a huge support, our family supports us (although they don't quite get our desire to keep doing this at the high school level), and I feel confident (not everyday, just overall).

 

The hardest part was feeling like I know where we're going and what I'm doing. I spent a lot of time in 7th and 8th researching paths, methods, the hard realities of homeschooling high school. It's not THAT much different, but it feel more "real". *I* feel more responsibility because the entire four years of high school can have an impact of where/when/how he attends college.

 

We tend to operate in left field with our schooling, the balancing act of tests, scores, grades, creating that academic resume for ds is a bit daunting. I've done a lot of listening and observing my son, a lot of reading here, asking questions, and I've come to a point of owning the path we're on. A lot of that is defined by who my son, not what box I need to check to do this. I've tried to mold the requirements around who HE is, not having him met this and that because that what everyone else is doing. We tend to operate in real life like that anyway, we're weird in that way.

 

I have a peace about high school I didn't have 2 years ago. Hanging out with the wonderful people on this board helps.

[kewb]

I am in my first year of homeschooling high school. Last year was spent with lots of soul searching and researching and discussion to figure out if we should continue. I will say I have been finding this year challenging. I think the challenges are mine not so much my son's. I have outsourced Spanish this year and next year will probably outsource another class as well. He seems to be responding well to outside structure.

 

The social thing is a biggie. There just are not that many secular homeschool high schoolers where I live. It is me and a couple of other people. However, I did go up against the school district so that he could participate on the high school swim team. This has helped immensely.

[clementine]

I agree with Miss Marple. High school is where I am really seeing the fruits of our labor! We've homeschooled since the beginning and our oldest started high school last year. We did outsource a few classes (math, science, and language) so that she could learn with another teacher, take notes and tests from another teacher, and work in groups. I don't think that outsourcing is necessary, but for us it was the way to go.

 

I am seeing her get more serious about her classes, being more independent, and taking pride in her work. I am so proud of the student she has become.

 

I am so glad we made the decision to continue, believe me, it was not an easy decision to make!!!

[aelgraham]

Thanks for all the encouraging replies. I agree that high school is the "dessert" and I would really enjoy it. My son is bright, interesting, and funny. He is maturing and becoming easier to teach, though last year and the year before were very rough. We live in a great area for homeschooling, so there are lots of options for classes. We've always outsourced science, and the local community college has a dual enrollment program for age 16 up.

 

I can tell my son is on the fence, which doesn't help my decision making. Most of his good friends go to school and I think he is starting to want to go and see what it's like. I really don't think he will like it all that much, and I can give him better academics at home and with outsourcing some. I still think it's up to me and my husband, but it would be much better if DS actually wanted to keep going with hs, and was excited about the possibilities.

 

Did any of you have to persuade your DS or DD to keep going with it? Do you think they were glad or felt they missed out?

 

Thanks so much for talking through with me!

 

Amy

[clementine]

We sat down with our dd and wrote out what her schedule would look like with high school in a brick and mortar school and homeschool. She has a very time-consuming extra-curricular schedule, plus she volunteers in a local hospital once every two weeks, so when putting everything on paper, it just made sense to continue homeschooling. She literally would have had no time to just pick up a book for recreational reading. Our local high school brags a lot about their electives, but their core subjects are lacking.

 

Our dd shadowed at several schools just to see if she felt like she was missing something by not going to school. That was such a good experience for her. She spent a full day at each of these schools and was able to see that, although it may seem fun at times, there is a lot of wasted time and 'busy work' assigned.

[mschickie]

We actually pulled sd out of ps in the middle of 9th grade. She now says (she is in college now) that was the best thing we could have ever done for her. She is more prepared than many of her fellow students and she has said she learned more while hs'ing than she could have ever done in ps school. The classes are just too large, kids get lost in the shuffle and most of the teaching is done to the lower range of students. When we pulled her out we found so many weaknesses in her education and she was an honors student! Unless there are extreme circumstances dd will not be going back to ps.

[mathwonk]

This remark may be relevant depending on the model you use for homeschooling. I am a retired math prof, feeling bored so I attended the first day of class in an advanced course that interested me at uni on monday. today i just felt like i could not afford to spend 3 hours commuting round trip to the course plus the $20 worth of gasoline, and besides, the notes are online so I could use the extra time to read them and be ahead of the game right?

 

Well I tried it and I learned again that it takes far longer than 3 hours of reading notes to make up for a really good hour of lecture, where you get facetime with the expert, can ask questions, and are force fed a beautiful oral version of the material that echoes in your brain for hours afterwards. Now over 8 hours after the class, I have still not finished reading today's online notes, having spent all my time reviewing monday's notes. If I were in class I wouid have heard it all 8 hours ago, and been thinking about it ever since.

 

So if your homeschooling consists of having your kid read a book, then it is not likely as good as going to a good class. but if you yourself can provide the teacher's oral and personal input in every subject, then it is better, because you have only one student.

 

This is not a deciding opinion, just some small amount of data. you are still the boss, and know all the other factors, but this is something i myself had forgot about how valuable a really good class can be in person.

 

it just dawned on me that if there is any wisdom in my observation, one might benefit from having ones homeschooled kid, (in those cases where you are not available for personal instruction, or feel unqualified giving it), listen to a video, like khan academy.

[mathwonk]

ok further reflection makes me consider the context here. i am choosing which of several classes i wish to attend, based on the interest of the subject and the high quality of the professor, and the class has about 12 students.

 

perhaps you are considering attending a school where you have only limited knowledge of the quality of teachers or content of classes, so your choice is far more of a black box. but shouldn't you and we all, be in the situation I am in, of knowing exactly who is teaching the class and what will be taught, and choosing whether to attend or not based on quality of the experience?

 

dream on....

 

but that is indeed where i arrived at a certain point in my life, and with all sincerity i suggest you also aspire to choosing your own teachers. it is possible, with certain sacrifices. and the tuition also goes away when the teacher appreciates having you as a student.

 

i beg your indulgence slightly more. first of all, there do exist extremely good teachers out there. secondly they are very open to accepting excellent students, i.e. those who are not just bright but dedicated and receptive. thus one thing you can do for your kids is teach them to be good students, the kind who can eventually choose their own teachers.

 

This is not pie in the sky, as I myself, after graduating college, slowly learned this lesson, and never paid a dime of tuition afterwards, to be taught by the best mathematicians in the world. In interest of full disclosure I was very poor.

[mschickie]

Mathwonk I think it really depends on the child whether or not reading a textbook will impart the information. How the child learns really plays a part in what you choose to use for them. For sd reading her Saxon textbook provided more knowledge than she ever received listening to her teachers and participating in her honors math class. There were some areas that she needed further clarification on but I was here to help. For the parent who is not comfortable if there are math questions at the high school level there are plenty of programs that provide support or tutors can be hired. I would agree with you that on a college level where the problems are more in depth a classroom setting is usually the best but for high school that is not always true.

[FaithManor]

Well, for us, we didn't have any good options. Our local PS is atrocious and even using "School of Choice" law for Michigan and putting them in the highest ranked school in our county, would still only be a small improvement over atrocious. We couldn't afford to move to the neighborhood one county east and south of us that has a top ranked PS high school that has earned that reputation and the only two private schools we can afford anywhere near here are actually not any better than the PS in academics and only somewhat better for environment. That left us feeling like either I needed to get back into the workforce and spend ever cent I made on the boarding school at Cranbrook which would have been an option for dd, or homeschool. We opted for homeschooling because she wasn't ready to leave home yet and we knew a local young lady who went to Cranbrook for a year with a lot of scholarships so her parents were able to afford it, but the student body treated her HORRIBLY because she didn't come from a "monied" family - it is unfortunately, fairly common at that school. Additionally, I couldn't make enough to afford it for the boys. At $38,800 this year and two in high school with a third entering during the eldest senior year, there wasn't any way to financially make it happen. I'm a professional pianist and when my "gig plate" is full, my studio is full, and I have some private music therapy clients at $40.00 an hour, I still do not make enough to send three kids to that school at one time.

 

My suggestion is to really check out the charter in an in-depth way. Ask to see the textbooks...post the titles here so you can get some feedback. Find out about classroom sizes, discipline policies, etc. See if you can determine what demographic of student they are trying to reach...arts and humanities, math and sciences, vo-tech, etc. Some schools are more focused than others but if you don't ask, you will not know to what degree that focus goes. I've known of math and science schools so hyper focused that their teaching of the mandatory humanities were absolutely atrocious. I've known of arts and humanities schools that turned out kids who could barely work with a fraction or a decimal because they let an awful lot slide while churning out dancers, painters, etc. If you aren't willing to sacrifice rigor in a particular area to rigor in another, then you want a well-rounded school or one that despite focus, still strives for excellence in all areas. Look at the grading procedures, the kinds of exams they'll use, etc. Is the school designed to be significantly better or is it just another fairly standard high school that is really not going to be better than the PS down the street.

 

Find out what the admission's criteria will be. Many areas will have FLOODS of students apply for the charter. Will your student meet the criteria to get in or will there be a wait list and how long will that wait list be?

 

For me, high school has been my cheesecake. While I always quake in my boots just a little at the thought of just what I've taken on, I get to see the fruits of my labor. The other day, the boys and I began the lecture series, "The Great Debate", on the U.S. Constitution by the Great Courses. I sat down to go over the discussion questions with them and to examine their lecture notes. Our discussions were amazing. They brought up several really well developed and supported opinions on the options available to the States in response to the failings of the Articles of Confederation. They debated each other and then they took me on...I won some of my points, but I conceded to them a few times too. Knowing what I know about the U.S. History and Government courses offered at our local PS, I can tell you this type of discussion doesn't take place there. They break open the book each day, the teacher asks who did the assigned reading, half of the class stares sullenly at the walls, so he/she actually takes the time to read it outloud, someone throws a spit-wad and gets yelled at, another cracks a joke and it takes five minutes to get them settled down again, vocabulary is gone over because this school is all about bubble tests and so they require every teacher in every class do to 20 minutes of test prep on vocabulary in every core subject except math in which case they do typical bubble test prep for 20 min. of the period related to the ACT - doesn't work, the school average for the October test was just announced and it as 19.8! It will take long enough to get through reading the assigned pages a loud and the bubble test prep, that if they have a discussion it will comprise at best 10 min. of the class period, but in reality the teacher needs to make tomorrow's assignment and collect any daily work that was completed and of course, there was attendance to take and announcements to make before class began. I've done the math, the instructional time is less than minimal. The AP classes have been eliminated so no hope there.

 

I think that emotionally, I'd have a hard time letting go of this time with them. I would do it if homeschooling were a bad choice for one of them because ultimately, we began this journey deterined to make the best choice for each child, always. But, it would be super tough on me to let go.

 

When we graduated dd, we held a commencement and reception for her. Dh said something to the 50 people in attendance about that day being as much of an achievement for me as it was for her. I have to say, he was right. It was a journey we made together and one that I would not have wanted to miss.

 

But, it definitely isn't right for everyone.

 

If you choose to homeschool for high school, there are a lot of resources available to assist you with providing an good education for your child in whatever subject areas leave you quaking in your boots. There are many video resources, the Teaching Company - I highly recommend many of the Great Course for teaching your child how to take notes from lectures - MIT opencourseware, more curriculum options than ever before, and with Amazon, Ebay, Barnes and Nobles, Kindle/Nook, and Half-Price books, well written college texts are available at a fraction of the cost of what the previous generation paid for them.

 

You have the hive too. We try very hard on this board and the college board to support one another through the process and give solid advice on the tough stuff!

 

There are also dual enrollment options if you have a good CC or uni nearby as well as online college courses when your student is ready for that leap. There are many options available.

 

My only caution is this. Many public and private schools do not accept homeschool credits at the high school level and many will not accept test scores for grade placement. Therefore, in most cases, one can not take a "year by year" attitude about high school. Usually, if you begin homeschooling for 9th grade, you'll need to make that committment for four years, not one.

 

Faith

[JumpedIntoTheDeepEndFirst]

I'm not sure I have enough experience to share, I'm only 1/2 way through with getting my first through 9th grade. The only advice I'd give is to plan ahead. High school took much more planning, it terms of materials, course descriptions, grading methods, etc. We are also using some text books that were acquired directly from the publishers and getting access to all the teacher materials took multiple emails and various forms being submitted-you may want time to set this all up. I definetly underestimated all of this an am still playing catch-up.