Reading aloud/ being interactive : when did you stop?

[RobinL in Canada]

Reading aloud has been one of the joys of homeschooling my four sons. When they were younger, we read aloud some of their schoolwork, and we always read aloud in the evening--assorted quality fiction. Now I have only my youngest still home (13/ gr 8). About a year ago, I stopped reading aloud to him in the evening as he no longer was keen on it and preferred to red on his own then. However, last year, as part of a co-op I taught, we focused on world geography, and I continued to read aloud children's fiction set around the world.

 

Now the co-op has ended, and he's home alone with me for his schoolwork (aside form another co-op elsewhere once a week where he has art, drama, science, gym). This year, we're picking back up where we elft off woith history, and he's covering early modern/ modern using a combination of Spielvogel's A Human Odyssey and and older narrative series called The Universal History of the World. The one thing I was still reading aloud to him was a recent, lightly fictionalized series about church history. The other day, though, he asked if he could read those himself to save time (it takes about half an hour to read aloud a typical chapter).

 

SO here I am, suddenly with no reading aloud to do anymore...and not much discussion aloud either. He answers the questions in the Spielvogel text but always briefly, and frankly I can't think of much more to drag out in discussion when it's just the two of us. When I ran my co-op, he and the other students produced various "poster projects" on historical and geographical topics, but they were younger then--ages 10-13--and now it seems quite pointless to pour time into a project which no one else will see (no, no relatives around to invite over to a "homeschool" evening).

 

I guess that although I posed this as a read-aloud question, it's really more than that. I'm finding that our homeschooling has become pretty dry and dull and non-interactive in general, and I'm not sue what I can or should do about that. With my older sons, I did find that the high school years at home became less interactive as they did more independently, but somehow it seems harder to face that with my last child. I read about others here having fabuulous discussions with their kids re history, etc, but that just has never happened in my homeschool--probably because I haven't been keen about history myself. I've been grateful that we have a strong high school co-op nearby where they all had the chance to take courses with other instructors who seem to do better at drawing out my boys (I teach there as well, literature and writing, and manage to keep things livelier with the students I get there, perhaps because it is a class environment), but my youngest has to wait until next year to join. So what, if anything, to do now? How can I engage more with my son re modern history (my least favourite time period)? What, if anything, can/ should I still read aloud to/ with him? What changes can be made to make our last few hs;ing years together more engaging for both of us?

 

You;d think I'd have it all figured out after 18 yrs hs;ing, but I;d appreciate any input!

[regentrude]

I understand what you mean: fewer projects, less interaction, no reading aloud. The same thing happens in our home. On top of all, DS is really introverted and prefers to work on his own, and DD is taking two heavy classes at the university which leave little time for anything else.

 

I find that we do have great discussions, though, if I do not make them "school", but just let them happen naturally. DD reads a lot and loves to talk about literature; all I have to do is create space and time in our schedule (often in the car) to listen to her start a conversation, and then we can have the most interesting discussions. DS is very interested in politics, and we often have family discussions that are spawned by some news article or something he found on the internet. Another starting point for talking is watching films together.

 

So, maybe the key is not to make the conversations directly tied to mandatory school work, but to just let them happen. I enjoy that I can talk to my teens like I can talk to other educated adults, and I think that this is a good, necessary transition as they change from pupils whom I need to teach to independent thinkers who self-educate and who share their insights and thoughts with other grown ups.

 

ETA: My kids have vetoed read-alouds since they were able to read independently, but we listened to many many audiobooks in the car on our long drives. Now TC lectures have taken the place of the audiobooks, and we enjoy listening together when we drive 18 hours out west for a backpacking trip.

Edited October 10, 2012 by regentrude

[RobinL in Canada]

Alas, I seem to have only one son like this--second son, who is currently away at university, but who will readily chat and disucss with me when he;s home. The other boys just are not like this (at least, not with me).

 

I noticed that your daughter is covering world history 1600-1850 right now. Although she is older than my son, would you have any specific suggestions re writing assignments for such history study for a 13 yr old ? My son is not yet writing full essays (though we will be covering that later this year), and doesn't seem yet to have a very analytical approach to history, so I find it hard to know just what to ask him to do in terms of writing at this level. ??

[regentrude]

I noticed that your daughter is covering world history 1600-1850 right now. Although she is older than my son, would you have any specific suggestions re writing assignments for such history study for a 13 yr old ? My son is not yet writing full essays (though we will be covering that later this year), and doesn't seem yet to have a very analytical approach to history, so I find it hard to know just what to ask him to do in terms of writing at this level. ??

 

We do not do a lot of writing for history, usually a few longer papers on topics of her choice. This semester is very full with her outside classes, so history is on the back burner and will get done over break. She is particularly interested in history of literature and authors right now and would probably choose Byron's life or something similar as her research topic. (DS woudl want to write about soem war)

[hsingscrapper]

My oldest doesn't seem to want to read aloud anymore but we read the same book and it makes for interesting discussion.

 

Would that liven things up?

[Candid]

We hit the wall about 18 months ago when outside activities pushed into our last read aloud time. At that point I was attempting to read War and Peace out loud to my oldest, but we had so many interruptions that we were both not making forward progress in any reasonable way nor were we tracking well with the characters.

[Jean in Newcastle]

We read aloud at lunch. My younger one is 10 but I don't see myself stopping even when she's older. We all enjoy it. We do not read aloud specifically for school but simply because we enjoy it.

 

I have a morning "seminar" for ds every morning. We concentrate on a different subject each day. I've found it very helpful to have this time to touch base with him on each subject, to look at it more in depth and to discuss things.

[shanvan]

I read fiction selections aloud, but we have younger Dd who sits in too. We just finished Pride & Prejudice, which was supposed to be 1-2 chapters aloud, but both Dc enjoyed it so much, we just did the entire book. I think Ds enjoyed it more that way. We tend to stop and discuss a lot along the way. I don't really have a plan though. I'm kind of haphazard and only read aloud the books that strike my fancy. I'll also ask one of the Dc to take over and read parts at times. We do not have a read aloud going right now. Not sure what we'll do next. Last year read a-louds were scanty b/c I like to do them in the evening and we had too much going on at night.

[Jenny in Florida]

I stopped reading aloud with my daughter when she went to college.

 

I'll let you know when I stop with my son.

 

We don't read aloud in the evenings, usually, but mostly over breakfast and/or lunch. At any one time, I often assign him two books, one to read on his own and one we read together. The together books are often things I think will be a bit of a reach for him, things I suspect he may not love and might not put in the effort to understand and absorb if I handed him the book and walked into another room. Reading aloud gives us the opportunity to stop and talk and look up words and check in with each other as we go. I honestly believe it's one of the most valuable things we do for school.

 

As for projects, my son still likes those, too. We just joined an informal co-op, and I'm thinking I might sign up to teach a couple of sessions later in the year and let my son give a quick talk to the other students and share one of his projects as part of the teaching time. I figure it'll make doing the projects more interesting if he has a show-off opportunity.

Edited October 11, 2012 by Jenny in Florida

[jessicalb]

I have a 9th grader and we still read aloud, and discuss a lot. You could make discussion part of the grade for some subjects. Or maybe you could find shorter things to read aloud, like poetry or short stories once a week instead of every day?

 

Our read aloud time comes when at least one person is doing chores. Whoever is not currently doing a chore reads aloud. We trade off, generally at my discretion (which is really when I am sick of washing dishes or sick of watching him wash dishes and not get them clean).

 

We used to have a lot more read aloud time and I do miss it. One way I have stayed really involved is I flip open the science or math or whatever and pull out some topics to discuss. This helps cement the learning and keeps me in the loop and interacting with him.

 

This is kind of a sad time, isn't it? Homeschooling the youngest in high school, I mean. I'll miss it very much when it's done. :/

[FloridaLisa]

We're still reading aloud here with all of those home and not away at school. We only read aloud fiction in the evenings together. It's a great way to wind down and we all look forward to the next part of the book. I like to finish the evening's reading with a tease like the chapter title or question about plot.

 

We haven't read texts together and I don't think any of mine would have wanted to. Reading aloud is slower and it's harder to study unless you're a super auditory learner. They usually want to take the text, highlight it, takes notes from it and read it at their pace on their own time.

 

I can see that reading aloud would change when it's between you and one older child. Still, I think it could be some wonderful time together:

 

• evening lattes and a good book;
  
• hot chocolate, a fire, cozy throws and a good book;
  
• having your son take a turn reading while you do some hand-work;
  
• encouraging your son with some handiwork (drawing, whittling) while you read aloud;
  
• reading aloud at the park, on a blanket and a picnic;
  
• choosing a book and then watching the movie;
  

 

I think it might be fun to mix it up, add in a special spot or food (what boy doesn't like that?) to add back in the fun of reading together. Also, audio books might work in the car or even at home while you relax or do some hand-work.

 

HTH,

Lisa

[Joan in GE]

I think discussions are such an important part of home education - though I have to admit that it is much easier to manage now that I only have one left...

 

To me this is an area where HE can be lacking....if there is not enough understanding of how to express oneself....from how to pronounce words that one has never heard, whether in a science text or sophisticated literature to the expression of complicated arguments without getting lost oneself...

 

And because oral exams are part of the Swiss matu...I've realized that I better start preparing dd already....and get her to talk as much as possible..

 

So we do as much orally as possible....lit analysis in French and English lend themselves well to this....American Gov (more lit analysis using texts from the WTM list)....American Hx...not all the time but when possible...

German and AP Hum Geo no since they're online...chem to check comprehension and do labwork...life management, we're going through communication skills which lends itself well...then life skills, I read various books outloud that we discuss as we go...

 

Dd is very auditory...so she wants me to read texts (as in textbooks) aloud too, but I don't tend to read lit aloud...

 

This reminds me of a thread Jane in NC started ages ago about talking about math....though I must confess we still aren't talking that much about math....though I do plan to have dd solve problems aloud at the white board in prep for the oral math exams...I should reread that thread...

 

Joan

[Mom22ns]

 

• evening lattes and a good book;

• hot chocolate, a fire, cozy throws and a good book;

• having your son take a turn reading while you do some hand-work;

• encouraging your son with some handiwork (drawing, whittling) while you read aloud;

• reading aloud at the park, on a blanket and a picnic;

• choosing a book and then watching the movie;

 

 

 

We do all of these! My kids still enjoy listening to me read. Dd draws, paints her nails or does her hair while I read. Ds just listens, although he will take a turn reading if I ask.

 

I read textbooks outloud with dd. It is slower, but it helps her focus and every time I try to stop she requests we resume.

 

Ds reads his own textbooks and does most of his work independently. I agree with Regentrude that my best conversations with him tend to be in the car and I enjoy just talking to him like an adult on various subjects. I read all the novels that he reads for lit and they often come up in conversation and we especially love analyzing characters and comparing them between works. He brings in such interesting analogies. I do enjoy him as another educated person that can discuss and delve into any topic we're in the mood for.

[RobinL in Canada]

I guess my 13 yr old son just isn't yet at the stage where he is interested in discussing what we read in an analytical way. Sometimes I have raised those sorts of issues, but he just does not seem to think in that way yet or like to "analyze" a novel we may read vs just plain enjoy it. I think he finally lost his interest in having me read aloud to him (in the evenings) when he found that none of his friends was being read to anymore. Even though I said there was no reason to stop at any particular age, his heart just wasn't in it anymore : ( My older sons were several years older when we stopped reading aloud because of the age spread (ie, when son #3 was 12, son #2 was 14/ 15 and son #1 was 17).

 

I do think it's tough when one is down to the last child at home/ homeschooling. The entire dynamic of the homeschool changes and I find that the energy level is much lower for both of us. I keep telling him to hang in there until next year/ gr 9 when he can join our high school co-op, take different classes, meet plenty of new kids, and engage in new activities. But till then.....

[Joan in GE]

I guess my 13 yr old son just isn't yet at the stage where he is interested in discussing what we read in an analytical way. Sometimes I have raised those sorts of issues, but he just does not seem to think in that way yet or like to "analyze" a novel we may read vs just plain enjoy it. I think he finally lost his interest in having me read aloud to him (in the evenings) when he found that none of his friends was being read to anymore. Even though I said there was no reason to stop at any particular age, his heart just wasn't in it anymore : ( My older sons were several years older when we stopped reading aloud because of the age spread (ie, when son #3 was 12, son #2 was 14/ 15 and son #1 was 17).

 

I do think it's tough when one is down to the last child at home/ homeschooling. The entire dynamic of the homeschool changes and I find that the energy level is much lower for both of us. I keep telling him to hang in there until next year/ gr 9 when he can join our high school co-op, take different classes, meet plenty of new kids, and engage in new activities. But till then.....

 

 

It's interesting how different dynamics can be...My dd was so excited to finally have 'all' my attention. So while people in our community thought being alone at home would be worse...she has found it 'better' - though she does miss some of the things we would all do together...

 

Anyway, I'm wondering if is partly a difference in gender...as it would definitely have been harder to have all these conversations with my ds who likes to answer with one word 'phrases':)...though I know there are talkative boys out there too, so it is not 'just' gender...

 

And then 'transitions' are difficult....Last year was really hard for me - the first year when ds3 was gone..maybe I was mourning a bit in a way. I don't think I was as talkative or as invested as this year...Lots of outside factors as well, that went into the equation....

 

Are there things your husband can discuss with him? projects they can work on?

 

ETA - I just saw your other thread....Are there any men in your church or other community groups that would take an interest in your son, or include him in their families, even if the children are younger? That could be another opportunity to interact and care for others...

 

I don't know if you have read the book Hold on to Your Kids by Gordon Neufeld but he talks a lot about the importance of interaction with adults who care...this is not the same as Clinton's village book because Neufeld is a proponant of home education...Maybe this book would give you ideas as well, beyond the age group thing...

 

Joan

Edited October 15, 2012 by Joan in Geneva

[swimmermom3]

We lost our read aloud this year as well with my youngest choosing to attend public high school for ninth grade. After 19 years of reading to children, it is a tradition I am loathe to leave behind. We are able to keep our discussions going, in part, because I continue to read their literature selections. Another thing that has been both helpful and enjoyable is that we watch either a Jon Stewart or Stephen Colbert episode during dinner. I know. It is an appalling vision, right? But it allows us to have some fairly lively conversations during dinner clean-up and then it doesn't cut in to homework time afterwards.

 

Joan in Geneva - thanks so much for the link to Jane's thread. I am afterschooling the boys in math and reading Jane's take as well as the responses was inspirational.

[TippyCanoe]

nm

[RobinL in Canada]

It's interesting how different dynamics can be...My dd was so excited to finally have 'all' my attention. So while people in our community thought being alone at home would be worse...she has found it 'better' - though she does miss some of the things we would all do together...

 

Anyway, I'm wondering if is partly a difference in gender...as it would definitely have been harder to have all these conversations with my ds who likes to answer with one word 'phrases':)...though I know there are talkative boys out there too, so it is not 'just' gender...

 

 

 

ETA - I just saw your other thread....Are there any men in your church or other community groups that would take an interest in your son, or include him in their families, even if the children are younger? That could be another opportunity to interact and care for others...

 

I don't know if you have read the book Hold on to Your Kids by Gordon Neufeld but he talks a lot about the importance of interaction with adults who care...this is not the same as Clinton's village book because Neufeld is a proponant of home education...Maybe this book would give you ideas as well, beyond the age group thing...

 

Joan

 

Yes, I did read the Neufeld book some years ago, and it confirmed my views on homeschooling. Don't remember it clearly now, though.

 

Honestly, I don't know how to get any men involved with my son. I have certainly spoken to friends of mine about this need and asked if their husbands might include my son in various activities, etc, but nothing ever comes of it. The groups for kids his age at our church don't appeal to him because of the rowdiness and there don't seem to be any other venues in which to connect with men. My older sons found some mentor types on their own over the years (some of the sons more than others) but for this youngest one, no one seems to have emerged as a possibility. It does sadden me but I'm at a loss re what to do.