Sugar, honey honey, my candy girl - does she need to break the habit? If so, how?

[SKL]

I just read someone's comment that corn syrup was causing learning problems for her child.

 

My dd5 is crazy about sugar, to the point where she will sneak and horde, and if she sees anyone eating something sweet, she gets totally distracted. When she eats something sweet, she reacts very quickly - she gets jovial and very cute, then it spirals into impulsive, disorganized behavior. Sometimes she'll do something she knows is wrong. The other day she told me, "my brain feels strange and makes me do wrong things."

 

Normally I don't give her sugary stuff during the day, but other people do quite regularly. Because the sugar seems to be inevitable, I decided to let her save up candy in a bag and let her have a piece around bedtime if her behavior has been OK. (It doesn't affect her sleep.) I figured that making it completely forbidden would just make it seem more desireable. I hoped that with an expectation that she could get some most days, she would stop being so obsessed with it. And that she'd learn to better control her reactions to it.

 

Well, lately things seem to be getting worse. Her sugar "highs" are less and less amusing, and the sneaking/hoarding/obsessing is becoming a regular thing. I'm also concerned that this could be affecting her learning.

 

Do any of you forbid sugar for reasons like the above? If so, how do you do it - do you tell everyone your kid is not allowed any sweets at all, or do you just try to keep it to a low level most days? Is this an addiction that requires "cold turkey" to fix the problem? What other foods might be part of the problem?

[Melaz4]

It was my son you read about. If you read the ingredients of candy most likely it's sweetened with high fructose corn syrup or corn syrup. What I did when I first started eliminating was to just take out the high fructose variety. Then things got better but he still had symptoms. Then I took out corn syrup which eventually led me to all derivatives of corn. He still had his tic but only during peak allergy season (spring, and fall). His teacher was amazed by his progress and was no longer concerned with holding him back. Emotional outbursts became less too.

 

When we first started I just said "we are going to start a little experiment". We also had "Fun Friday" where we could eat anything and watch a movie. Then on the other days I made sure to bake sweets, or let him eat some of his favorite sweet foods but they were organic and corn less. There are many options in health or organic stores. Amazon is an option too. He's not so addicted to sweets now either. I just started slow because I didn't want him to feel like he was being punished by all the changes. Oh and I should add the new rules applied to the whole family.

 

I would seriously recommend that book by Doris Rapp. "Is this Your Child". It really changed our lives. I don't want to sound like food is a cure to learning disabilities and behavior. Like I said in my other post I still think my son has mild dyslexia but I KNOW in his case his food allergy increased his symptoms.

 

In my option for your daughter it does sound like candy is a problem. You'll get resistance for taking it away at first but I'll be you'll see a difference.

[PeterPan]

Candy is not a food group. Yes you can and should pull her off. Sounds like it might involve getting it out of the house entirely. There could be something going on you're not thinking about like some hypoglemia. Is she getting snacks every 1 1/2 -2 hours? At that age they burn through a lot of energy. Nuts, at 13 they burn through a lot of energy, lol. But the snacks should be FOOD, things like bananas, dried fruit, apples, real FOOD. The best way to intervene in that process is to get her before she's hungry for it and use a really high-value option to lure her. At that age it might be a new banana slicer gadget so she can slice and make towers. Or it might be smoothie you buy in the frig section of the grocery store and freeze to make real fruit popsicles. (works great, easy too!) Or take yummy frozen fruit and put it through a snowcone machine to make shaved ice. Real food.

 

Have you read about candida? Once a person's gut gets out of whack (too much sugar or just the gut is too stagnant, with not enough bowel movements and clearing), the person will start to crave sweets. In that case they especially need the fruit to start clearing out the gut. You can also intervene in a situation like that and get her on Primadophilus, which is a really good brand of acidophilus to rebalance the gut. I suggest using the Optima strength. If she can't take capsules yet, then open it onto a spoon and give it to her with a little glass of orange juice. Also work on eating a salad every day. It will help clean out her gut.

 

For years I didn't allow candy in our house at all. Zilch, nada. Now I have some, but it's kept up very high and is only for occasional use (bribery for VT, that sort of thing). Candy is NOT a food group and eating a lot of it drains the immune system and means she's not getting the nutrients real food would have provided. The hardest thing for me was the woman at church who would hand out bags of candy. Some churches are very candy-driven, kwim? I finally cut a deal with dd that I would put the bags up very high in the pantry, so that they weren't thrown away, and that on occasion she could ask for them. That was better than me going into her room and finding a whole bag of candy, and it allowed her some distance to forget it.

 

They can only eat what you allow. Be tough. :)

[AmyinMD]

I would completely pull the sugar. We just did for our ASD son and it is hard but I think it's necessary. I did catch him yesterday with a cookie another child had brought home from an activity. He managed to get it off the fridge and I found him hiding in the coat closet with it. Keeping just a little around doesn't work because he always manages to find it. It has also made me give up sugar which I really needed to do anyway.

 

It not only affects my son's behavior but he has severe yeast issues and has been on antifungal meds for a year almost continuously. He has lots of gastro problems and from what I've been reading sugar is horrible for the gut. We've done other diet modifications but I really dragged my feet on the sugar which I'm finding to be the hardest one to give up.

 

I will use dates as sweetener in some things which don't seem to get the bad behavior that sugar and corn syrup do. I do use some stevia. I made some popsicles last week with homemade yogurt (very small amount of sweetener) and fresh squeezed juice that were a hit. I'm trying to find other treats like that so we don't feel deprived. We also have a vitamix blender and frozen bananas blended with a bit of frozen fruit and water or milk made a nice ice cream substitute.

 

I'm not sure what we are going to do for school treats and that kind of thing yet. My son attends a special ed class which is on break right now but he goes back in July and they usually feed the kids things like animal crackers for snack. That is going to be hard when he's around kids eating things he can't have. For other events we tend not to take ds out much because his behavior is so bad. Today for example 2 of my girls have a play performance and then we are going to the cast party which will likely have sugary treats. Ds is staying home with dh who went to the play last night. I have made cupcakes once that were sweetened with dates and I've thought I should make a batch to freeze so I could grab one if we are going places where there would be treats.

[KS_]

For years I didn't allow candy in our house at all. Zilch, nada. Now I have some, but it's kept up very high and is only for occasional use (bribery for VT, that sort of thing). Candy is NOT a food group and eating a lot of it drains the immune system and means she's not getting the nutrients real food would have provided. The hardest thing for me was the woman at church who would hand out bags of candy. Some churches are very candy-driven, kwim? I finally cut a deal with dd that I would put the bags up very high in the pantry, so that they weren't thrown away, and that on occasion she could ask for them. That was better than me going into her room and finding a whole bag of candy, and it allowed her some distance to forget it.

 

They can only eat what you allow. Be tough. :)

 

I agree. We didn't have candy at all for years, and then the kids started getting involved with church activities that gave out candy :001_huh: So I started letting them save some of it and have a piece a day. My dd, though, got to be so focused on it that I finally said no more. If they get it at an activity, they have to give it away and not bring it home, or if it does get brought home, it gets thrown out or taken back out of the house.

 

I still try to have alternatives that are somewhat sweet but healthy. Even then, they don't get a lot of that, either.

[PeterPan]

BTW, here's an example of the type of smoothie we use to make popsicles.

http://fresh.amazon.com/product?asin=B000Q7PRKK

 

This one says it's from juice and puree, but others in the same section of the frig will be more directly blended up fruit. They'll actually say 1 banana, 4 strawberries, 2 apples, that sort of thing. Either way they make a nice popsicle. You just pour into your popsicle molds and freeze. That way you can control dairy too.

[Punks in Ontario]

I don't know how many kids you have, but I would probably dump all candy for a couple of months and see what happens. Around here I try to have some alternatives around for snacks such as potato chips or pop corn. Yes, I know they're terrible for you too, but they're not sugar.

 

Then you have a base line to figure out how much of an impact the sugar is actually having, and to get the cravings under control.

 

My sugar addict could sniff out anything sweet. I would say he was addicted. He tended to get very spacey and retreat into his own little world when he got sugar. His sister would get difficult and angry.

 

And yes, outside activities are the worst problem for candy. For a while I would have alternatives for my little guy, but I've gotten lazy and just leave it now.

[Melaz4]

I found once the "addiction" was out of my ds system for a year or so the small amount he gets at outside functions don't really bother him anymore. At first I had to pack his lunch and send treats to school for bday parties. He no longer has the cravings.

[SKL]

I found once the "addiction" was out of my ds system for a year or so the small amount he gets at outside functions don't really bother him anymore. At first I had to pack his lunch and send treats to school for bday parties. He no longer has the cravings.

 

On one hand that's heartening . . . on the other hand, a year sounds like a long time right now! :tongue_smilie:

 

I have a tentative plan . . . let's see if it helps.

 

Thanks to all of you. Your comments have all been really helpful.

[Sevilla]

Some people (including children) are more susceptible to addiction to sugar (or other foods like carbs - I know a LOT of carb-addicted people). Sugar is not a necessary food group, it is not essential to a healthy chidhood, and it sounds like it's driving your DD downa path of undesirable behaviors. I would have a talk about how you're cutting it out and that the only sweeteners you'll use are fruit (including the fiber) and sometimes raw honey. Nothing else.

 

That doens't mean she can never have treats - but it means the treats will be homemade, include enough fat to help satiate her appetite, and not be as addictive.

 

We've been refined-sugar-free in our home for a few months now and there have been nothing but positive changes in our kids (and they didn't have behavior issues before or anything - the big change has been in their eating! They eat healthy foods now that they turned noses up at before. My DS is happy to have celery with nut butter and raisins as a snack whereas five months ago he would have said 'no way'. He eats wayyyy more protein and vegetables than he did before,is open to trying new foods, etc... It really is a huge change :)).

 

But they get plenty of 'treats' in our house - popsicles (coconut milk + pureed fruit = delicious and healthy enough to let them have as part of breakfast if they want it), 'anytime cookies' that are pureed banana and apple plus almond flour and almond butter - it cooks up just like soft cookies and the kids are welcome to have their '2 a day' whenever they want. Smoothies. Nuts. Dried fruit (in moderatio - this is really high in sugar so might trigger her, you'll have to see), homemade lara bars (dates/nuts - google for recipes). Plain yogurt made 'chocolate flavored' by stirring in plain cocoa powder (no sugar in it!). As a special treat 85%-90% dark chocolate (it has almost no sugar but is so fatty and rich that it's delicious and they love it).

 

There are lots of options for her to have yummy 'desserts' but I would tell her there is a 3 month moratorium on any candy so you can see if she feels better and her brain feels better. You might find the cookbook Eat Like a Dinosaur helpful (they do use some sugar/honey in their recipes but honestly I cut it down to just 2 Tbsp per recipe (of honey, omitting any sugar) and the kids still love it and don't notice a taste difference.

[Rebecca VA]

Sevilla, I would love to have the recipe for "anytime cookies." (Sorry about hijacking the thread, but Sevilla's cookies sound so good!)

[KAR120C]

Now I have that song in my head!!! :glare: :lol:

[Geo]

But they get plenty of 'treats' in our house - popsicles (coconut milk + pureed fruit = delicious and healthy enough to let them have as part of breakfast if they want it), 'anytime cookies' that are pureed banana and apple plus almond flour and almond butter - it cooks up just like soft cookies and the kids are welcome to have their '2 a day' whenever they want. Smoothies. Nuts. Dried fruit (in moderatio - this is really high in sugar so might trigger her, you'll have to see), homemade lara bars (dates/nuts - google for recipes). Plain yogurt made 'chocolate flavored' by stirring in plain cocoa powder (no sugar in it!). As a special treat 85%-90% dark chocolate (it has almost no sugar but is so fatty and rich that it's delicious and they love it).

 

QUOTE]

 

Cookie recipe...pretty please?

Edited June 18, 2012 by Geo

[Finnella]

We didn't figure this problem out until our son was already 12. We should have had a clue earlier because I found out I was addicted to sugar a few years earlier. (I never believed it was possible until I went through withdrawal.)

 

Anyway, we do not keep it in the house. It's too much of a problem for my younger son and for me. And going off sugar has helped my DS so much: fewer migraines, better mood, virtually no wild swings of blood sugar.

 

We have friends who also have a child on the spectrum. Their son is so addicted that they have to lock up the pantry in order to have plain sugar for their coffee. (I shudder to think of it, but I'd do that as a kid.) Our son tried that for a while, but after he was on a very low sugar, generally low carb diet for a couple of months, he stopped.

 

Now that I've been through all this, I do think you have to stop cold turkey and get rid of everything in the house. After a detox, maybe you have some minimally processed sweets occasionally. It depends on how sensitive to sugar everyone is. We help moderate the sweets by not bringing home any large quantities.

[Hedgehog]

Sniff, who is 6, is diagnosed with ADHD. After many months of frustration (for both of us), I cut all sugar out of his diet, and strictly monitored his consumption of grapes, bananas, carrots, sweetcorn and dried fruits. The difference is remarkable - he has much better control of his impulses, much better attention. It's not quite at the level of my other kids, but I can live with him like this!

 

What's more poignant about all of this is that Sniff knew that he was doing something wrong when he gave in to impulses to hit his siblings or to destroy something, but just didn't seem to be able to stop himself. I would say, "why are you doing this?" and he'd just stand there looking perplexed and say that he didn't want to do it but he just did it anyway.

 

He knows that sugar makes him behave badly, and he doesn't want to go back to way he was before, so he's very good at staying away from sugar even when we're out. If he's offered something, like at church, he will always ask whether it has sugar in it.

 

We also make sure that he has something nice that he can eat, if we're having a snack. He loves fresh soft fruits, nuts, cream and greek yoghurt, and we'll often have that sort of thing for dessert. We're probably better for it, to be honest!