4kids4me Posted January 12, 2012 Share Posted January 12, 2012 We're fairly new at a large-ish church (around 400 and growing). I was asked to be on the Welcome Team. This team is fantastic for the first stage of new folks at our church. The greeters at the door are helpful, they ask you to write down your information, we're mailed a welcome card complete with a Starbucks giftcard, we're invited to a Newcomer's Lunch. However, I find that after the service when we all gather for munchies, it's hard to meet folks. I totally "get" that those that are there want to talk with friends. So unless one joins a bible study group, it's more difficult. At the meeting last night I was sharing some of this. They could see it, but they don't have anything in place yet for integration. I think maybe something like smaller socials (something easy) that mixes people up....but there are got to be other ideas. A small part of the problem is that though we have a property, we're still in a high school for Sunday mornings. We don't have Sunday school class and we only have the building for the morning. Once our church is built (in about two years), I can see the numbers go up quickly, and it'd be nice if we could get something in place now to help folks integrate more easily. (But also, with a new church we can have SS class, etc.) Any ideas are welcome! Thanks!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
angela in ohio Posted January 12, 2012 Share Posted January 12, 2012 It sounds like asking new folks to be on committees is a good start. ;) That makes people feel welcome. You can ask for volunteers to invite new people over to dinner. making that one-on-one connection really helps. Then you have someone to talk to. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris in VA Posted January 12, 2012 Share Posted January 12, 2012 Our clergy make a point to tell the "old timers" to remember the newcomers during Coffee Hour (after-service munchie chat time). We all enjoy talking with friends, but we are reminded many times to make the stranger feel welcome. It's working pretty well, except now newcomers are greeted and chatted up by 2 or 3 folks, and sometimes that's overwhelming! LOL Can't win... We do have dinner groups, called "Foyers." If you want to be in a Foyers group, you sign up. About 8 people are in each group. You meet for dinner at each other's houses. Sometimes it's 4 couples, sometimes it's singles with marrieds--everyone brings something and you just have a nice time together and get to know each other. The host/ess does the main dish, and folks each bring appetizers or dessert or sides. If someone's house is too small, they eat outside or even go to a picnic area or a restaurant (that's rare) or go to one of the dinners we have at church and sit together intentionally (we have LOTS of dinners throughout the year...). I do find SS the best way to get to know folks--when you are sharing things of the heart, it's easier to become close. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
4kids4me Posted January 12, 2012 Author Share Posted January 12, 2012 Yes, I think hospitality is key. There are a couple ladies I can organize this with, and they know folks in the church, so maybe we'll go that route. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Laurie4b Posted January 12, 2012 Share Posted January 12, 2012 We're fairly new at a large-ish church (around 400 and growing). I was asked to be on the Welcome Team. This team is fantastic for the first stage of new folks at our church. The greeters at the door are helpful, they ask you to write down your information, we're mailed a welcome card complete with a Starbucks giftcard, we're invited to a Newcomer's Lunch. However, I find that after the service when we all gather for munchies, it's hard to meet folks. I totally "get" that those that are there want to talk with friends. So unless one joins a bible study group, it's more difficult. At the meeting last night I was sharing some of this. They could see it, but they don't have anything in place yet for integration. I think maybe something like smaller socials (something easy) that mixes people up....but there are got to be other ideas. A small part of the problem is that though we have a property, we're still in a high school for Sunday mornings. We don't have Sunday school class and we only have the building for the morning. Once our church is built (in about two years), I can see the numbers go up quickly, and it'd be nice if we could get something in place now to help folks integrate more easily. (But also, with a new church we can have SS class, etc.) Any ideas are welcome! Thanks!!! Some suggestions that don't require anything but for people to assume a different attitude: Ask people who normally hang around after church to chat, to hang around, but assume the "hat" of host or hostess, so that they may still chat with their friends, but like a hostess at a party, would be aware of who might not know the others and act as a link. So if I'm a designated hostess, I know I'm there not just to talk with my friends, but to help everyone at the "party" to connect. People tend to sit in the same place every week, so have someone who is the designated host for their section. If there is a welcome/greet one another time each Sunday, they will notice who is new, or who is missing, etc. It's their job to know the names and to be able to contact someone missing, etc. Do you have children's Sunday school? Having gatherings for parents with kids a certain age is a good way for parents with kids to meet others they may connect with. For instance, it could be a breakfast before class one week. We usually end up friends with people who have kids our kids' ages. Having a clear road to joining a small group, (life group, Bible study group--whatever you call them) is helpful to new people. Choose an inexpensive restaurant nearby and issue an invitation to "eat at ____'s after church this Sunday." This can work well with a larger congregation. People come to the restaurant, and again, you have hosts, who meet and greet and connect. This doesn't require any more time or organization or money than to designate some hosts/hostesses. While it's nice to get an invitation to a home, that can be limiting--you've just met one family and if it's that family's ministry, then their social plate is likely full, so it may be a way to feel welcome, but not be a way to meet a person who will be your friend. The larger group meet at a local restaurant can give people a chance to eat with another family at the same table and to circulate and meet others. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
4kids4me Posted January 12, 2012 Author Share Posted January 12, 2012 Some suggestions that don't require anything but for people to assume a different attitude: Ask people who normally hang around after church to chat, to hang around, but assume the "hat" of host or hostess, so that they may still chat with their friends, but like a hostess at a party, would be aware of who might not know the others and act as a link. So if I'm a designated hostess, I know I'm there not just to talk with my friends, but to help everyone at the "party" to connect. People tend to sit in the same place every week, so have someone who is the designated host for their section. If there is a welcome/greet one another time each Sunday, they will notice who is new, or who is missing, etc. It's their job to know the names and to be able to contact someone missing, etc. Do you have children's Sunday school? Having gatherings for parents with kids a certain age is a good way for parents with kids to meet others they may connect with. For instance, it could be a breakfast before class one week. We usually end up friends with people who have kids our kids' ages. Having a clear road to joining a small group, (life group, Bible study group--whatever you call them) is helpful to new people. Choose an inexpensive restaurant nearby and issue an invitation to "eat at ____'s after church this Sunday." This can work well with a larger congregation. People come to the restaurant, and again, you have hosts, who meet and greet and connect. This doesn't require any more time or organization or money than to designate some hosts/hostesses. While it's nice to get an invitation to a home, that can be limiting--you've just met one family and if it's that family's ministry, then their social plate is likely full, so it may be a way to feel welcome, but not be a way to meet a person who will be your friend. The larger group meet at a local restaurant can give people a chance to eat with another family at the same table and to circulate and meet others. Great suggestions! Thanks so much, Laurie! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
4kids4me Posted January 12, 2012 Author Share Posted January 12, 2012 Wondering if anyone else has ideas, before this post gets buried. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
4kids4me Posted January 13, 2012 Author Share Posted January 13, 2012 Trying one more time, since it's evening. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MindyD Posted January 13, 2012 Share Posted January 13, 2012 Does your church have smallgroups? That's the only other suggestion I can think of. I think it just takes time to get to know people in a church. Our church sounds similar to yours and I agree that it's hard to get to know people. I haven't figured this one out either so I'm not much help. I miss actually knowing the people I go to church with and being friends outside of church. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GailV Posted January 13, 2012 Share Posted January 13, 2012 go to one of the dinners we have at church and sit together intentionally (we have LOTS of dinners throughout the year...). Okay, this is brilliant. You know what I hate about church dinners? Each family sits in their little discrete unit (or, at best, the high school kids run off together, and maybe the middle schoolers), and they just talk to each other and MAYBE their bffs who happened to sit at the same table. If groups sit together, it's the same cliques every time. Plus, we dislike going to someone's house for dinner (or most restaurants) due to a myriad of dietary restrictions -- we'd have to bring a complete meal for ourselves, which is what we end up doing at potlucks, but at least at a large potluck it isn't quite so obvious that we're bringing an entree, 2 sides and a dessert. So, church potluck, but with deliberate table seatings, would be a great compromise. For the record, I'd try to figure out ways to integrate new people that don't involve food. That way the people who have strict dietary needs don't feel so excluded, especially right off the bat. It's tough to be new and have the conversation revolve around why you have to avoid gluten or nuts or tannins or anything from a cow or whatever. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
acurtis75 Posted January 13, 2012 Share Posted January 13, 2012 We just started attending a large church after attending the same small church for almost 15 years. It's somewhat different because you aren't in a building yet but some of the things they do that seem helpful are: When you visit on Sunday and drop your children off for the first time they actual assign them a buddy. There is some free time where board games are played before their actual classes start. This prevents children from sitting at a table alone and feeling left out. After service they have a connection room where people are assigned to greet/ask questions. There are multiple bible studies that meet before or after church and function like small groups. You can attend any you like and they have social functions throughout the year organized by the groups. This could be done in a school setting because you have multiple classrooms. Every other month or so they have a ministry fair type event where ministry leaders are available to meet with new members in an informal session to make them aware of opportunities to serve within the church. Getting involved is the best way for new members to assimilate in to the body. They also have the new member banquet. This is only possible with a building but maybe you could do something on a smaller scale like donuts & coffee before service. On Wednesdays the church serves a meal so people rushing from work to get to midweek activies don't have to cook. It's $5 a person. When you visit you are given a coupon for this. We attended this since it was free and because there are banquet tables you are forced to sit with someone you don't know. There were also people from the church going around to the various tables introducing themselves and engaging guests. There is a newsletter given each week with a list of upcoming events, bible studies, etc and who to contact if you would like to attend. There is an "information booth" type area in the lobby which is always manned by several friendly people who answer questions about missions, service opportunities, etc. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hillfarm Posted January 13, 2012 Share Posted January 13, 2012 Our Pastor hosts a reception at the church about once every 2 months to welcome new people and to answer any questions they might have. There are usually a couple of deacons in attendance, the youth leader, occasionally the children's leader, and anyone else in the congregation who wants to help welcome newcomers. Our Pastor is very personable and easy to talk to, and he is willing to answer questions about everything from finances to women in positions of leadership in our church. This is not for brand-new, first-timers, but is great for new people who are exploring the church. A few invitation cards are printed up with the date of the next reception and everyone knows where they are kept at the welcome center desk, so anyone can hand one out to a new person or family to remind them of the date and time. It is a bit tricky determining exactly how to interact with first-time visitors. Some people want to be recognized and seek interaction while others prefer to be more anonymous and like to quietly observe to determine if the church is a good fit for them. One important thing that our church does is to give all visitors the opportunity to fill out a card requesting a home visit or requesting prayer or counseling on a particular topic. IMO, many times people come to a church in a state of very pressing need. They may not know exactly how to ask for help, but certainly will if there is an established and confidential way for them to do so. One of our welcoming committee's biggest priorities is to respond to those cards in a timely manner. HTH Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Liz CA Posted January 13, 2012 Share Posted January 13, 2012 We recently went to a new church due to a move and we realized quickly that we needed to find a small group to get plugged in. We did exactly that and I find it's the only way in a larger church to get to know people beyond the casual :"Hello, good to see you..." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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