Impish Posted June 12, 2011 Share Posted June 12, 2011 You'd figure that on my 5th go 'round, I'd have lightened up a bit. Really not so much. At all. In fact, I'd say I'm *more* paranoid than ever before. Some of it is pretty self explainatory. I mean, I didn't have RSD when I was having my other kids. Nobody seems to know what effect chronic pain has on the pregnancy, developing baby. Other than yes, it puts me at risk of preterm labour, and hypertension. Thanks. Part of it is, and I quote (while glaring, esp at SpecialMama, who finds this hilarious) is my 'advanced maternal age', aka I'm over 35. I've had an ectopic pregnancy, and m/c. I know, first hand, how things can go wrong. I've always been a bit paranoid...walking on eggshells til over 12 wks, still holding my breath until after 28...Heck, I don't think I've ever bought anything for baby until after 28 wks. Paranoid, yup. With Princess, I had an 'irritable uterus', and was in the hospital several times with susptected preterm labour. I'm having some issues now, and I don't know if its more irritable uterus issues, IBS, or just 'you've freaked yourself out and over reacting to everything, you dumb bunny!' issues. Another 10 wks until I can breathe. Am I the only one that doesn't deal gracefully with this aspect of pregnancy? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WiseOwlKnits Posted June 12, 2011 Share Posted June 12, 2011 I know what you mean. I was naively stupid with my DD, which was bliss - you know...you pee on a stick, get a +, and are holding a baby 9 months later. Then I had an ectopic and a m/c before getting pg with DS. I spent the entire time till "viability" holding my breath. 3 more m/c's and now I'm pregnant again. I feel like a walking pharmacy because of all of the drugs that we've tried to control the Hyperemesis this time and I'm more than a little worried about the effect that they may have had on the baby. I'm 21 weeks tomorrow and right now I'm holding my breath for 22 weeks - the minimum that they'll attempt measures for a pre-term baby. Once I hit that, I'll be holding my breath for 26 weeks when chances of survival go up significantly. Then 32 weeks. Then 36 weeks. Add onto that that I'm having another c/s (1st was because DD was breech, 2nd was because I hit 42w2d with DS) and all the fear of surgery and I figure I'm going to be a nervous wreck until this baby is at least 6-8 weeks old. :/ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dawn in OH Posted June 12, 2011 Share Posted June 12, 2011 I wouldn't worry about "advanced maternal age" too much. I was 37 when I had my last baby. It was the easiest of my pregnancies. It was the easiest delivery. It was he shortest and least agonizing labor. It was also the quickest recovery. The only problem I had was my sugar was high. I almost failed the 3 hour glucose test. I don't know if that had anything to do with my age though. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
twoforjoy Posted June 12, 2011 Share Posted June 12, 2011 Part of it is, and I quote (while glaring, esp at SpecialMama, who finds this hilarious) is my 'advanced maternal age', aka I'm over 35. Don't you hate that? This pregnancy was a total surprise, and I wasn't particularly happy about it for a while (DD was 6 months when I got pregnant, and I would have chosen to wait until she was at last 2 before having another). DH's "look on the bright side" to me for a while was, "Hey, at least you just missed them writing 'advanced maternal age' on your chart." Thanks, hon. Am I the only one that doesn't deal gracefully with this aspect of pregnancy? I was a nervous wreck during my entire first pregnancy, which wasn't helped by the fact that I had PIH. I was a bit more relaxed with my second, although I did still have a lot of paranoia about things going wrong. This time, though, I've had a really easy pregnancy and think I was in denial until maybe 22 weeks or so, which really cut down on the amount of time I've had to worry. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JudoMom Posted June 12, 2011 Share Posted June 12, 2011 I was more paranoid with each pregnancy :grouphug:. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Geo Posted June 12, 2011 Share Posted June 12, 2011 If it helps any...I was 43 and had cancer while pregnant with my last one. Stressful? Yes. Here's what I did: redirect your thoughts, it just feeds the worry monster. I know it sounds simplistic, yet incredibly hard. Try to up your b-complex some, it helps with stress management (less reactive to stress)...oh, and have a cup of chamomile too. :001_wub: :grouphug::grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MamaSheep Posted June 12, 2011 Share Posted June 12, 2011 Well I only had two, but I was more paranoid with my second. With my first I think I was just clueless. I had a rough first pregnancy so then by the second I freaked out over everything. By 5 I think I'd have to be locked up. :grouphug: Same here. Cluelessness is an amazing confidence builder. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Impish Posted June 13, 2011 Author Share Posted June 13, 2011 Thanks everyone. Nice to know I'm not alone, lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tree House Academy Posted June 13, 2011 Share Posted June 13, 2011 When I had my first son at 19, I was blissfully unaware of anything that could go wrong. By the time my second son was born (when I was 24), I was terrified. I had read too much, heard too much, known too many women that had issues and I spent the whole pregnancy scared to death. He was born healthy, but the stress of all the worry made my OCD kick into overdrive after he was born and all of that is part of the reason I can't have anymore children. :( Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted June 13, 2011 Share Posted June 13, 2011 I was originally told that I could not have children. Then when I got pregnant anyway 4 years later, I was told, "Oh, what we meant to tell you is that you SHOULDN'T have children." Too late (and we desperately wanted kids anyway). I was told that there was a good chance I'd be an invalid afterward. I found some really great information on being a disabled parent - on arranging the baby's room if you have limited mobility of any kind, on dealing with many of the challenges. In my case, they were wrong. Pregnancy did make me get worse but giving birth gave me a respite for a while (hormone levels?) I was glad that I had done the research though because it gave me confidence that I could meet the challenge if need be and has helped me to think outside the box at times since. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dakarimom5 Posted June 13, 2011 Share Posted June 13, 2011 I get more paranoid too!! But I usually have reason. Last pregnancy I had my gallbladder taken out and had uterine bands. But in other pregnancies I've been on bed rest, had shingles, Bell's palsy, and a stone in my salive gland! And those things are just the odd ones!! But I am the happiest pregnant woman you have ever met even if I have morning sickness for the whole pregnancy!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Impish Posted June 13, 2011 Author Share Posted June 13, 2011 I was originally told that I could not have children. Then when I got pregnant anyway 4 years later, I was told, "Oh, what we meant to tell you is that you SHOULDN'T have children." Too late (and we desperately wanted kids anyway). I was told that there was a good chance I'd be an invalid afterward. I found some really great information on being a disabled parent - on arranging the baby's room if you have limited mobility of any kind, on dealing with many of the challenges. In my case, they were wrong. Pregnancy did make me get worse but giving birth gave me a respite for a while (hormone levels?) I was glad that I had done the research though because it gave me confidence that I could meet the challenge if need be and has helped me to think outside the box at times since. I need to start researching. Right now, I'm so focused on just getting to the end of things that the reality of what life will be like seems so far off. We're looking at Wolf taking parental leave for at least 2 mths, if not 3. Seriously thinking RSD is going to be nasty after the baby is born. Other than that... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dinsfamily Posted June 13, 2011 Share Posted June 13, 2011 I've gotten more paranoid with each one too. The m/c between the 3rd and 4th didn't help. Over 35 being AMA makes me laugh these days. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pink Fairy Posted June 13, 2011 Share Posted June 13, 2011 After 3 miscarriages, and spending 3 months in the hospital while pg with my now 4yo, paranoia is my middle name. On the other hand, my first 4 pregnancies were problem-free. It's been a great reminder that God is the one in charge, and no amount of worry will change a thing. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
A.Balaban Posted June 13, 2011 Share Posted June 13, 2011 I worried more during my second pregnancy, but also found I had more to worry about. My first pregnancy was a time of turmoil for me- I was working 12+ hr days until I was put on bedrest at 32 weeks after going into PTL. He was born healthy at 35 weeks, 4 days... My second pregnancy was much worse. DD stopped growing, and I spent every second of every day we found out that she had stopped growing (at 22 weeks) worried. Worried all day, worried all night. When her growth continued to decline, I had 2x a week doctors visits. I worried through those. Because of that, I know I could never survive another pregnancy. I would probably just explode from worry. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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