How do you balance 4-H with homeschool?

[dmrranch]

Hi 4-H Moms!

 

I need your help and encouragement!:grouphug: For a little bio...

 

My dd14 has been in 4-H from age 9, so this will be the beginning of our 7th year in 4-H, and dd10's 3rd year. As you can see ds was a baby when dd10 was added to the bunch.

 

I have been co-manager of our club for what will now be my 3rd year. I had never been in 4-H or FFA.

 

dd14 has been an officer since 5th grade and president of her club the last 2 years and will be again this year. dd10 has been the last 2 years also. Both girls have turned in record books EVERY YEAR and have earned awards that have made them and me very proud. (rookie of the year, I Dare you, bronze star). But, the date for turning in record books in order to be interviewed for awards came and went. They will still turn one in but will not get an award and I am totally ok with that. Those of you that know about record books know how active the girls are in each of their projects. Oh, and my dd14 was VP of our county council this year which meant an extra meeting to go to.

 

But, I think I'm beginning to suffer burnout. Why? Because I am actually considering dropping out of 4-H. But, we have so much invested for my dd14 for scholarship that I hate to.

 

A few more things...we pushed through and turned in record books and did livestock show after a very rough year a few years ago...we lost a daughter, my grandmother, and father all within that year. So, we're not quitters. I'm busy in other areas also...church:sing in praise team, handbells(just gave that up), help in sunday school as needed. I work a business out of my home when I can. We started taking classes at a co-op that is 45 minutes from home, one day a week, last year, and I teach algebra there.

 

So, how do you find a balance between homeschooling TWTM way, and being this active in 4-H. My girls each have about 6-8 project areas in their record books. (Horses, Vet Science, Dog training are their more active ones) We have 146 acres and run cattle.

 

One more thing you should know, 4-H numbers have been dwindling somewhat around here. We just lost our "4-H" ag extension agent and the other 2 agents left will have to help out. So, they need our involvement to help keep things going...I think...

 

I know I need to keep goals for our family. The #1 goal we have for our girls is to be more consistent in instilling God's truth through more bible study than what we have been. I want to do more with homemaking skills and TRY to not do as many animal related projects. (They love it. DD14 wants to major in ag)

 

Sorry so long! I'm open to any constructive help/guidance. And, you can also just say, "Are you crazy?????":lol::lol::lol:

[myfunnybunch]

Are you crazy?!?!?! ;) and :grouphug:

 

Sounds to me like you need to prioritize.

 

First, if you have a dd interested in agriculture as a career, 4-H projects are great way to get the kinds of record-keeping, study and practical experiences she can use to apply for ag scholarships and in her future career. I wouldn't drop 4-H altogether.

 

School is also a priority. How much time do you need to give them what you consider a good education, including more Bible study?

 

Then you narrow down the 4-H projects. Six to eight project areas sounds like an awful lot. Decide how many projects is reasonable, including the one (or more) homemaking area that you feel is important. Two? Three? Five? Then ask your girls to choose only that number.

 

It's hard to choose. But once you know how many activities your family can reasonably handle, it's easier to stick to your guns and say "This much. No more."

 

:grouphug: We are going through this with different extracurricular activities ourselves. It is a blessing to have so many good choices, and the challenging bit is having to prioritize, understanding that we can't possibly take advantage of every single great opportunity, and saying No More.

 

Cat

[simka2]

Horses and Dogs? We have a rule about one project that involves extra practices. I'm not sure about your area...but for the horse and dog projects here thay have extra practices...I can't do it all! So this year as I add 2 more to the 4-h world I'm only letting them do the horse project + stationary projects! That has helped me...

 

DD will do horse veternairy science and something crafty

ds's will do horse, veteraninary science and something else they decide on.

[dmrranch]

Are you crazy?!?!?! ;) and :grouphug:

 

Sounds to me like you need to prioritize.

 

First, if you have a dd interested in agriculture as a career, 4-H projects are great way to get the kinds of record-keeping, study and practical experiences she can use to apply for ag scholarships and in her future career. I wouldn't drop 4-H altogether.

 

 

Cat

 

Thank you for encouraging me! The above is exactly what I am thinking. But, to stay in...definite choices!

 

Horses and Dogs? We have a rule about one project that involves extra practices. I'm not sure about your area...but for the horse and dog projects here thay have extra practices...I can't do it all! So this year as I add 2 more to the 4-h world I'm only letting them do the horse project + stationary projects! That has helped me...

 

DD will do horse veternairy science and something crafty

ds's will do horse, veteraninary science and something else they decide on.

 

I'm going to let my dds read this! Our area doesn't have extra practices for dogs here and we actually do not have a "horse club" per say. They are riding at home and my dd14 is training horses here and helping a lady down the road.

 

Dogs...well I knew I should explain more here. They have JRTCA Jack Russells and go to shows about 1-3 times a year. We haven't done the 4-H Dog Show/project. No one in our county is and the agent doesn't really know much about it. So, they practice walking their dogs and setting them up. That's about it. They might get to go hunting with their dogs this year. I wonder if we should be doing 4H Dog Project instead of JRTCA shows???

 

I've told them they cannot boost up both of these. ie...there is a JRTCA National Show they would love to go to in Pennsylvania this year. But, dd14 also wants to start going to a few horse shows. I've told her we can't do both. May not be able to either. But, I may let her do the Tx JRTCA shows and 1-2 draft horse shows with our neighbor's gypsy cobbs a year. I'm undecided here. They are giving up most or all of their livestock show projects. Like you said, they can only do so many animal projects.

 

Dilemma: They have been blessed with opportunities. We will have to choose. Example: They just bred a very nice JRTCA female to a champion male. Might have something next year they would like to take to nationals. JRTCA also has nice youth competitions that the girls enjoy. They have been having a lot of fun when we go and learned a lot.

 

Our neighbor wants to work with dd14 to help her earn one of her gypsy cobbs. She hurt her back and needs help so it's a way for them to be a blessing to each other. LIke I said, she might go to 1-2 shows with her over a year.

 

Choices, choices...

Edited August 14, 2010 by dmrranch
clarification

[Ellie]

We didn't do 4H nearly as long as you have :-) but we counted 4H as school, not separate from it. Maybe it was easier for us than for you; I don't know which state you live in, but we were in California, and we weren't accountable to anyone for what we did, which might be true for you. Nevertheless, if my dc were so involved and successful in 4H, I'd find a way to make it fit into my state's hs laws. 4H is such a wonderful experience, and so educational, that it would be worth that effort. :)

[simka2]

Thank you for encouraging me! The above is exactly what I am thinking. But, to stay in...definite choices!

 

 

 

I'm going to let my dds read this! Our area doesn't have extra practices for dogs here and we actually do not have a "horse club" per say. They are riding at home and my dd14 is training horses here and helping a lady down the road.

 

Dogs...well I knew I should explain more here. They have JRTCA Jack Russells and go to shows about 1-3 times a year. We haven't done the 4-H Dog Show/project. No one in our county is and the agent doesn't really know much about it. So, they practice walking their dogs and setting them up. That's about it. They might get to go hunting with their dogs this year. I wonder if we should be doing 4H Dog Project instead of JRTCA shows???

 

I've told them they cannot boost up both of these. ie...there is a JRTCA National Show they would love to go to in Pennsylvania this year. But, dd14 also wants to start going to a few horse shows. I've told her we can't do both. May not be able to either. But, I may let her do the Tx JRTCA shows and 1-2 draft horse shows with our neighbor's gypsy cobbs a year. I'm undecided here. They are giving up most or all of their livestock show projects. Like you said, they can only do so many animal projects.

 

Dilemma: They have been blessed with opportunities. We will have to choose. Example: They just bred a very nice JRTCA female to a champion male. Might have something next year they would like to take to nationals. JRTCA also has nice youth competitions that the girls enjoy. They have been having a lot of fun when we go and learned a lot.

 

Our neighbor wants to work with dd14 to help her earn one of her gypsy cobbs. She hurt her back and needs help so it's a way for them to be a blessing to each other. LIke I said, she might go to 1-2 shows with her over a year.

 

Choices, choices...

 

Those are wonderful opportunities that I'm not sure I would want dd to pass up...esp the gypsy cobs!!! I want one!!! We show the horses thru ought the year and do 4-h...it's part of why we decided to homeschool. It allows us to take off mid week for horse shows. So I guess, I'm not real help to you! I might step down from leadership...and ask the kids to choose between leadership (that require extra meetings) and projects.

[dmrranch]

Those are wonderful opportunities that I'm not sure I would want dd to pass up...esp the gypsy cobs!!! I want one!!! We show the horses thru ought the year and do 4-h...it's part of why we decided to homeschool. It allows us to take off mid week for horse shows. So I guess, I'm not real help to you! I might step down from leadership...and ask the kids to choose between leadership (that require extra meetings) and projects.

 

What kind of horse shows do you go to? Do you do the yearly 4H Horse Show?

 

The leadership choices...that might work.

 

Do you do the 4H Dog project?

[jazzyfizzle]

:grouphug:

I can completely understand. Last year our middle son was working on showing in showmanship in one nat. venue, plus the 4-H dog showmanship project, we were out showing other dogs in two venues, in addition to herding training and working on herding titles. I took on co-running all of our weekly county 4-H dog practices, training, and dog show, & became a club advisor.

Dog events are so draining!

Add in a meat chicken project with 30 extra broilers raised for the freezer, and hatching out call ducks. Last year was my first year homeschooling two kids instead of one. I can't even imagine adding horse projects into that mix.

:svengo:

 

I think the idea to downsize is great advice. When we hit the end of the dog practice season here I also felt super burn-out. We need to cut back a bit, I feel massive overload and it is summer.

:tongue_smilie:

 

I know exactly how you feel. :grouphug:

[jazzyfizzle]

Those are wonderful opportunities that I'm not sure I would want dd to pass up...esp the gypsy cobs!!! I want one!!! .

 

*sigh* no doubt, I would love one also!!

[simka2]

What kind of horse shows do you go to? Do you do the yearly 4H Horse Show?

 

The leadership choices...that might work.

 

Do you do the 4H Dog project?

we do the 4-h horse show, includeing state fair here! Dd took 1st in her age group! We also do some open shows and this winter we will be starting some arab breed specific horse shows.

[Audrey]

Horses and Dogs? We have a rule about one project that involves extra practices. I'm not sure about your area...but for the horse and dog projects here thay have extra practices...I can't do it all! So this year as I add 2 more to the 4-h world I'm only letting them do the horse project + stationary projects! That has helped me...

 

DD will do horse veternairy science and something crafty

ds's will do horse, veteraninary science and something else they decide on.

 

:iagree: Only one thing that is heavy on the extra meetings/practices/etc. My ds is in 2 clubs -- one is just a beef club. That is his biggest project. The other is a general club that does communications and non-livestock projects. He participates in communications and that is once a month, plus the presentations which are done on his own time (we incorporate it into school actually), and he chooses one other project. That is usually a small group that will meet once or twice a month. What that all boils down to is about a meeting per week, which is plenty.

 

I also don't lead any of the groups or club stuff, but I do often volunteer to be a helper. I simply don't have the time to commit to leading, but I try to be there for the clubs in other ways.

 

Perhaps you can try to find a balance that will work for you and still keep the kids happy. It may take some sacrifice on their parts, but that would be better than having to quit entirely.

[bettyandbob]

You and your dc need to make choices. You do not need to heavily volunteer in everything. Pick one thing to be your main volunteer activity. Dabble in other stuff do not commit. Pick the activity that you think you have the best skills to support. Then dial everything else waaaaay back. That means when someone calls and says will you organize the main church fundraiser you say no, but if on the date of the fundraiser if you have extra time go ahead and show up and help set up. Do not feel guilty. I volunteer to run/manage one thing only. That is all I can handle. I do set up tables at church, shelve books at a school library once in a while, run to the store for ice when the organizer of the annual picnic starts panicking about ice and I'm there. I figure my community is benefitting from the main thing I do and I can let someone else step in and do the main leg work for other projects. I have a family and part time jobs. I am not at a stage to spend all my time doing things for the community, whether at 4H, church or sports. So I pick one thing that I'm best at and go with it. In a few years when my dc are grown I probably will do more.

 

Now, your dc sound over extended too. Again, pick one main focus area and do it well. It is possible to do a few smaller projects too, but your dc are doing several big things. My dd is 12 and she finally really does understand that she cannot do everything that sounds like a good idea. She has to pick something. And she picks. I will tell her what things are possible to do if the things she wants somehow involve me (usually as a driver, which I can't be all day long everyday). So that narrows what she might choose from. I might have a preference for what I want her to do, but she picks and if my assistance (driving) does not overextend me then it works.

 

Even with these limitations we have to maintain a tightly organized schedule.

[galtgrl]

"Are you crazy?????":lol::lol::lol:

 

 

:iagree::lol:

I'm exhausted just from reading your list of activities!

 

We're also heavily into the 4-H scene, but we have a rule that the kids can choose no more than 2 projects/ year. Also, if they want to take market projects, they have to choose the same project or wait 'til the next time the majority of them want that project. Last year we tried letting them choose different market projects, and all 3 chose something different...it just about killed me! So, we're back to the "1 market project for everybody" rule :tongue_smilie:.

 

We tried horse projects last year and it was just too time consuming for us. The girls are more into the goats now, and it takes alot less time. Of course, now we have too many horses just sitting around in the pasture...anyone want a horse?:)

 

Most of our 4-H involvement is not terribly burdensome. Their club meets once a month. There are clinics for animal projects, but they don't really take off until around March or April. The only other 4-H activities are a Health and Safety Speaking/ Skit contest and our annual Veteran's Breakfast. The summer is devoted to 4-H and swim team, and that's plenty...we do not do any "official" school during the summer, which helps alot.

 

It sounds like you're just trying to juggle too much. All of those things are good, but maybe you need to just whittle it down to the best 2 or 3. HTH!