mom2agang Posted June 1, 2009 Share Posted June 1, 2009 My 11 year old son can not focus when you ask him to do something. Examples: my dh "aaron can you get me a hot tea" aaron "sure" comes back with a warm dish rag or hands the tea to me. Another one "aaron did you give the dog fresh food and water?" he goes and puts her on the chain. We have been making him repeat what is said but that hasn't helped. We also tried discipline. Is there a subject in school that would help stop this? Do I need to do more dictations? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Laura Corin Posted June 1, 2009 Share Posted June 1, 2009 I don't know, but if you find out please tell me. Laura Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mombygrace Posted June 1, 2009 Share Posted June 1, 2009 I don't know really. What has helped my 12 yr old ds is repeating the sentence while looking at me. He is here now and says repeating the task to himself, till it is done, is what helped the most. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris in VA Posted June 1, 2009 Share Posted June 1, 2009 Could he have a processing issue? The part about being able to repeat what is said but not truly process it and show that processing by doing it is a red flag for me. Or he could just be a spacey 11yo who doesn't really care--that happens all the time at 11. Not meaning to insult your son at all, just saying that it seems to be an age where that can happen. I guess I'd look to his reaction when he's wrong--is he trying to remember but can't? Or is he just not seeming to put forth the effort? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amtmcm Posted June 1, 2009 Share Posted June 1, 2009 I have heard at this age their hormones get in the way of their thoughts, so that might be part of it. I'm reading Charlotte Mason vol 1 right now and she is all about setting up habits. In Laying Down the Rails, Sonya Shaffer (Simply Charlotte Mason) recommends watching expectantly (with no trace of annoyance) for the child to complete the task at hand. I have been doing this with my 12 year old and it takes almost more effort on my part than if I just did it myself, but Charlotte Mason promises it will pay off in the end. :) It is recommended to focus on 1 new habit at a time for 6 weeks, then that habit goes into maintenance mode and the child can begin working on a new habit. We're working on putting things away when the children are finished with them. I know this isn't exactly what you're asking about, but hope it's helpful. My DD has a lot of trouble staying on the task at hand and so I've been watching her with expectancy and it seems to be working. She also sees my hovering as a natural consequence of her forgetfulness/daydreaming and she finds it totally annoying so she gets on task immediately just to get rid of me. :lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sagira Posted June 1, 2009 Share Posted June 1, 2009 I don't know really. What has helped my 12 yr old ds is repeating the sentence while looking at me. He is here now and says repeating the task to himself, till it is done, is what helped the most. I still have to do this :blush: My thoughts are scattered and I'm a dreamer. My ds looks like he's heading the same way, but so far he's better than I was at his age :tongue_smilie: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SonshineLearner Posted June 1, 2009 Share Posted June 1, 2009 Well, My first thought is some type of martial arts... Carrie:-) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LanaTron Posted June 2, 2009 Share Posted June 2, 2009 I still have to do this :blush: My thoughts are scattered and I'm a dreamer. My poor kids have to ask me to do things for them multiple times some days. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Follstad Posted June 2, 2009 Share Posted June 2, 2009 Hello, My almost 7 year old boy has been in Taekwondo for 3 years and it has helped with his focus and attention tremendously, not to mention his coordination and confidence. Another benefit is giving him the tools to either get away from an attacker, or defend himself. His instructors stress, stress, stress personal responsibility, respect and a host of other great character attributes. With this said, my son still needs redirecting and patience on my part. But, I cannot even imagine how he would be without the Taekwondo. Sarah Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ibbygirl Posted June 2, 2009 Share Posted June 2, 2009 I'm starting to wonder if this is a common thing with this age. 11-12 yo's are so spacey. I think the fact that you can even get your kid to agree to make you some tea is pretty amazing!:tongue_smilie:;) :) hehe Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dsacco Posted June 2, 2009 Share Posted June 2, 2009 My friends and I are calling it male PMS :) Seriously ALL of our sons (ages 10-12) seem to be having the same issues.....mine does the mood swings as well which is just awful! There are vitamins to help "focus" but I can't remember (I want to say Sam-E) but then you have to remember to take them - LOL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rhondabee Posted June 2, 2009 Share Posted June 2, 2009 My friends and I are calling it male PMS :) LOL Too funny! I'll remember that. My DH has to remind me that our younger ds is going through what our older ds went through at 11yo - "girls on the brain", basically. I'm sure that's not what us mommas want to believe. I shudder to know there are little girls out there who actually want to KISS my dear baby!!! If they only knew the real boy.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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