:lol:

The idea of a youtube video, augh. Being a parent can be one of the most uncomfortable things ever.

:confused: Okay, not to hop sides here, but if you don't explain HOW to use one, how're they going to know? Just so you know, using it wrong is one of the main reasons they fail. Ime, the expiration date is an important thing to check.

Alcohol is illegal until you're 21. You can be arrested, the people you're with can be arrested, and then you all get to sit in a holding cell while they call your parents. Don't do it. That's what I tell my kids.

:grouphug:

Especially since, many times, it's taught by people who do not believe it themselves. Might as well have PE taught by a couch potatoe or English taught by an illiterate person.

No, I would never do that. Only because I detest public restrooms and I'm too scared of confrontation. My kids, however :glare: Have no problems saying, OMGOSH Mom! That lady left a HUGE POO in the potty! OH MAN! OH THAT'S SO GROSS! or Did you hear that Mom? The person in the next stall FARTED, ewww! Oh it stinks!!!!! I miss it when they used to just sit and sing :(

That's what I'm hoping. And you did, eventually, figure out how to separate yourself from all the gobbledy gook? She's a wonderful person, I just don't want her to suffer MORE because I was a putz.

But, will you tell them how to do drugs "safely?" That's just it though! Even WITH all the prevention out there, even with abstainence, there's a chance, there's a risk involved. (Think rape) Whether or not it is irresponsible to NOT tell your kids how to use condoms is really in the eye of the beholder. IOW, I tell my kids, don't do drugs. I don't tell them, don't do drugs, but if you do, go to X and they can insure you have clean needles, or order all your p*t from High Times, because then you know it isn't tainted. I can see saying, you're too young to do these things, wait until you're prepared to have a family, because that is the ultimate result of these actions. I can't see adding the caveat, but if you do, use these (grab a cuke kid, let's practice). :tongue_smilie: Thank you.

Will you tell them where to go for clean needles?

Having seen the thread that was posted by the same person, when this one first went up, I KNOW she was trying to bash people. In my first post, the one you responded to, I was just trying to put out the general idea, in answer to so many nay sayers, that it won't necessarily NOT work. And, esp., that these parents are doing what they genuinely believe is best for their kids. I'm up in the air on dating, I was not going to respond to this thread at all, until I read some of the op's responses and some of the negative things being said to people that don't teach sex ed. I've taught my dcs various things, whenever it came up, I'm in no rush and I'm not sure how I feel about most of these things. The only thing I am positive about is that the parents who don't allow dating, etc, care about their kids and they're doing what they can to give their kids good lives (the same as the rest of us), and attacking them, treating them like soft headed fools, or forecasting a future of sexual insanity for their kids, is pointless and mean. Please note, I'm not saying YOU said that. I expect, having read your responses you know what I mean.

We discussed that. It never occured to me that she would identify with a part of the debate like that.

My dd was born outside of marraige. This weekend we were watching the sparring about the health care reform and part of it was about abortion, which led to talking about unwanted, unplanned pregnancies. Dd watched, I watched, I argued with the tv (bad habit) and then dd blew her stacks. I am not an unplanned pregnancy! I am not an unwanted pregnancy! I am not a consequence! I am a person, just like everybody else! Well, we talked. I hadn't realized she identified with this so strongly :( She knows she was a surprise and she knows I was young. There are countless positives that came about in my life, because of my dd. She knows that too. Did you ever feel like that? Did you move past it, or does it still feel that way? <---- Going to watch my words even closer now.

We can't teach our kids everything, just because other people think it is vitally important. The abstainence parents believe that abstainence is the only way, it is the right thing to do, period. Teaching their kids how to prevent pregnancy or stds, just in case, is completely opposite of all the other things they teach concerning sex. So, if they don't want to teach it, I understand. I don't think they're foolish or blind, I think they're coming from a different place than me. The same way a pacifist (sorry for my spelling, if that's wrong) would find self-defense classes something they would never allow, a parent that believes strongly in no sex till marraige or purity or whatever, is well within their rights as parents to say no to sex ed. I don't understand why people are so vehement in calling this group of people onto the carpet for a public scourging. So they believe differently and are raising their kids to believe the same way, so what? It does not automatically mean their kids will be in the sex industry, or even that they'll have heavy petting before marraige. The kids may just grow up to be adults that feel the same way as their parents. It happens.

I know adults, who were told, as kids, do not watch these programs. They're adults, they still don't watch them, why? Because, they were raised to believe that certain shows/channels/ratings/topics were things they had no business with. I know adults who, as kids, were told that alcohol was a dangerous substance. They don't/haven't/and as far as they're concerned, won't drink alcohol. I know adults who, as kids, were told that caffiene was an addictive substance and they should not take it into their bodies. They, as adults, continue to scan labels looking for this insidious substance, so they can keep from taking it into their bodies. They don't even eat chocolate. Now, I'm not saying there aren't rebels out there, but to assume that all kids are going to rebel is foolish. To assume that all adults do everything their parents tell them is wrong is.. wrong. Heck, I still call to let someone know if I'm going out, where I'm going and when I plan on getting back, just in case something happens, because that is what I was raised to do. I still avoid people with the addictions my parents warned me about. I still do a lot of things, that I never considered rebelable (iykwIm), because they were things my parents considered highly important and I still believe them. Maybe their kids will get older and decide they like 'bad' television or 'bad' clothes or 'bad' hairstyles, but I doubt that ALL of these kids are going to end up bedding down before marraige.

We're all just very attached to our children and to hear them referred to as parasites is chilling. Perhaps it is a cultural thing. I see human life as an infinitely important thing. I think the taking of a human life is wrong, regardless of how you sugar coat it or hide it in pretty terminology. For someone who doesn't like abortion, you find a plethora of reasons to use it. I'll let Peek handle the logic, she does it so well.

I think you might've misunderstood me. I was wondering why you would consider affection Biblical, but you cleared it up, it's just not outlawed, so to speak ;) My comment about sex, was in regards to you saying sex was natural and normal. Many people assume that natural and normal equal healthy and I was just pointing out that circumstances could determine how healthy it was.

I'm just curious of where you're coming from with the idea that it's Biblical to be affectionate before marraige. Sex is normal and natural, but whether or not it's healthy, outside of the bonds of marraige is not necessarily true.

The girls I knew who did that, knew very well what they were doing and the hypocrasy of it. That being said, just because some may follow the letter of the law and ignore the spirit of it doesn't mean other people are wrong to use that word to describe it.

I took American Literature and American History last fall and I was surprised by the difference between Columbus' views and the way the history book portrayed it. He really believed he was doing God's work and he was not the heartless racist bigot he was made out to be, at all.

I'm sure, most of the purity talk does include a purity of the spirit. When they say sex, they mean more than the bare bones definition. Part of the Christian ideal is a purity of thought and behavior for everyone. Remaining pure for marraige doesn't mean just keeping your hymen, it means refraining from all activities that would call your character into question. IOW, you don't put yourself into a position where people can even THINK you're doing something 'wrong.' So, maybe hand holding and things are okay, possibly even a kiss goodnight, but the purity parents (if you will) that I've read on here, are not giving their kids any chances to make-out, let alone sexual activities that would call their purity of body or mind into question.

Once it gets really bad, you have to worry that a vessel might've ruptured. IOW, you're bleeding, but it stays under the skin and looks like a huge bruise. In your case, the bleeding stopped before there was any risk, but that is the concern with BAD bruises, is that there's bleeding you can't see. OP - I second the ice. And a trip to the doc on Mon., just to check the severity of damage, she must've hit it HARD. If you have a nurse on call at your doctor's office, you might want to call and ask if you could give your daughter Tylenol to reduce the swelling and pain :)

Of course, my parents' life plan for me was to be happy.

Have her hold her arm out and look to see if it's still straight. Broken bones still move, and in even more directions! You can also try to trace the bones with your fingers to feel for a break, listen for crackling noises. Hope all is well!

I see what you mean, even if your quote did not come through (Blessed Winter, I think?). There are ways to guide without guilt. You don't have to pc your language to your kids and when teaching them right from wrong, you don't have to add caveats. I was not pure till marraige, but I will (and for dd, have) tell my dcs that sex IN marraige blows extra-marital sex out of the water. Why? Because you know it's okay, it's NOT the wrong thing to do. Dh and I agree, being married means you're more comfortable, trusting, understanding, and relaxed; all those things equal a better bed mate.