It depends on what they want to do. My 9yo and a different new friend spent almost 2 hours making a slideshow of their AG dolls in different outfits, and then set the show to music. I thought that was great, although watching it was a bit tedious. ;) I wouldn't let them watch TV or movies unless it was a very long play date or things just weren't going well. The way I see it, my dd can watch a Netflix video by herself or with me. Playing puppies, ponies, Calico Critters, and spending hours using sidewalk chalk are best done with other kids. :laugh: If we have friends over, I want them to make the best use of their time. That being said, I just bought a bunch of movie candy and a popcorn popper for a movie watching treat. And I planned to invite some friends. So I guess I'm actually inviting kids over just to watch a movie, right after saying they should be playing instead. :leaving:

OP here. Wow! Who knew this would be such a hot topic. There are too many replies to address each one individually, but I appreciate hearing everyone's thoughts. FTR, I never suggested taking her phone away! I wouldn't dream of it. I'd be suspicious of any adult who tried to take the phone from my dd. I also don't want to be responsible for her phone, or have to attend to whether or not her parents are contacting her. My own phone keeps me busy enough. :laugh: I'm not judging the fact that she owns a phone, or can text. I was just genuinely surprised, and wondered if I needed to set some kind of limit. I don't want my own dd, or the other kids who are visiting, looking over this girl's shoulder, texting with strangers. What popped into my head initially was the thread on here about the girl being harassed with texts and ipad videos from "friends". I don't want my dd getting caught up in something inappropriate or unkind. I'm not saying this girl is inherently unkind, but groups of kids do things they'd never do individually, KWIM? I agree with Loowit that the girl could have felt left out, or didn't like the variety of games the other girls were playing. Her mom said she was shy, so that also could have been a problem. Three kids makes for a tough play date, but we already had 1 girl over when the 2nd showed up at the door. I didn't want to turn her away. When I get to know her better, I'll say something. Or maybe I'll help my 9yo come up with something to say. Loowit is right that this is our new reality, and we have to learn the social skills that apply to it. Neighborhoods have enough drama. Honestly, I wouldn't send her home for texting and contribute to the drama. :tongue_smilie: I'd rather see all the girls of the neighborhood find a way to play together.

Some adults don't even have the "better manners" you speak of. :lol: I like to think my kids will be as polite as your ds, when the time comes for them to carry a phone about. Her mom and dad are really nice, so I'm giving the girl the benefit of the doubt. I told my dd the girl in question might be insecure in a new group of friends, and trying to make a "good" impression. There was an equally odd, but entirely different behavior the first time we met her. Hopefully she'll settle in. I really just wondered what kind of limits, if any, to establish on the phone use.

I was so shocked by the fact a 9yo was texting instead of playing, I hadn't thought of it that way. You are right though. It *was* unkind, and dd ended up feeling hurt.

Yeah, I don't want to confiscate someone's phone. Aside from the safety aspect of kids being able to contact their parents, I don't want to have to monitor the phones. I'd have no way to know if it was her mom or her friend texting or calling.

What age did you allow this? I realize older teens are always on their phones, but I never thought about when kids actually cross that line. I also have an almost 12yo, but none of her friends have pulled out a phone on a playdate. I don't think any of them have texting.

Yeah, I was pretty surprised. I checked in on the girls often and noticed she had a phone out. When I walked her home, I asked if she mostly used it for making calls or texting, and she said it was for texting her friends. Until today, my dd didn't realize texting was an "age appropriate" activity for her peers. :rolleyes: She only gets to text dh from my phone.

RedSquirrel, Starr and WoolySocks, thanks for the replies. I'm glad I'm not the only one who found it odd. I wondered if I was just totally out of touch. The third little girl who was over also has her own phone. She doesn't bring it when she comes over to play though. RedSquirrel, I may approach it as a screen time issue. That is a good idea. In our family, the kids don't get unsupervised screen time. We've only just met the family, so I'll have to think about what to say, if anything, to the mom. This was the little girl's first time at our house, so it is a good time to establish some boundaries. Of course I wouldn't want to stop her mom from contacting her. My dd said it was distracting because she had to check her phone every couple of minutes.

Dd said it was weird. She probably felt a little jealous too, since the friend and her other friend were texting to try to set up a sleep over. I'm sure dd felt left out. There was a third friend over, so she and dd continued playing while the other girl took breaks on her phone.

A new friend came over to play with dd and spent a fair amount of time texting another friend. She also took a phone call from a friend. Aside from the fact that it is rude, I just don't like the thought of kids hanging out in her bedroom texting. I want them playing. :tongue_smilie: Can I say something to dd's friend? What would I say? FWIW, dd is 9, and doesn't have her own phone. Do you have rules about friends texting while at your house?

Oh yes. I love Trader Joe's chocolate chips. :001_wub: They were the first chips I liked enough to eat right out of the bag.

I love the line, "My possessions are causing me suspicion, but there's no proof"

I prefer the ingredient list of the Kirkland chips.

:iagree: It sounds like a fluff description.

Those are cute- just the right size for many things.

I have two LeCreuset rectangular dishes. I'm not sure what they are- 9x11 maybe. There is a lid that fits on either. We bought them on clearance, and I love them. I thought they could go in the dishwasher, but they are super easy to wash by hand. Nothing ever sticks. I have Emile Henry square and loaf pans. They also wash up easily. The bright colors of each of these pieces makes me happy, especially my cherry red, ruffle edged Emile Henry pan! :001_wub:

I don't reuse containers, but I often wish I had some around when I want to send leftovers home with dinner guests!

This is kind of what I was thinking. I could see one of my dds pointing out that we had covered the requirements with books on a road trip. I would laugh and agree. I wonder if someone could overhear our conversation and think that was all we "read". :blushing: In reality, my kids read hours a day also. Just because we "could" fulfill the requirement that way doesn't mean we would, KWIM? To answer your question about our summer reading program, kids read 500 minutes to earn a packet of wildflower seeds. After another 500 minutes, they earn a tote bag. Dh felt it was kind of lame to hand out seeds in July, which is a really bad time to start seeds! I am just glad there aren't any fast food coupons. :tongue_smilie:

This is very interesting! Thanks for posting it. I have noticed that the grade level or lexile level of books read in high school can often be pretty low. I assumed the point of reading them then was because the content makes for interesting or enlightening discussions better suited for older students. OP, we love The Princess and the Goblin. It has always been one of my dds' favorites. I like to listen to it on CD though. The British accents make it even more fun IMHO. :laugh:

This is what I was thinking too.

Unfortunately, I don't have to imagine it. :glare: I have seen this kind of behavior too, in women in their 30's and 40's. Sometimes I would vent to dh and he would ask if I was hanging out at a junior high. :lol:

I just wanted to add that I, as an adult, have left groups of people behaving badly.

I have allowed my kids to quit groups being overrun with bad behavior. We've also left churches over it. As Mimmy said, there comes a point where a child is no longer deriving any benefit from attending.

Our allergist said opening windows, especially in the morning, was a very bad idea. I do tend to open windows when it is raining, assuming the rain is keeping pollen down.

Agreeing with everyone else. It is a thoughtful gesture.