ChristyB in TN
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Posts posted by ChristyB in TN
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I would get the community involved in service activities somehow. Just providing places for recreation is not enough to change people. People change by serving others.
Oh, gosh, that is an issue I really want to discuss. Are you on FB? Joplin, MO has the coolest fb page I have ever seen. I think it is Bright Futures Joplin? Something like that. Community needs are posted and then, lickety split, it will say that the need has been met. We have created a copy of it here and are working to get the page out there where everyone is looking. We felt that we also needed to use it to promote community events, drives, fund raisers, volunteer opportunities, etc. I loved Joplin's ideas so much that it led me here to you all. Getting the ideas and works of other communities inspires and motivates.
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Raising Cain and Queen Bees and Wannabees helped me so much when my children were young. I wish I could get everyone's to read those, simply to help them understand one another and the human-ness of us all.
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Here are a few of mine:
We need a place for kids living in or around our government housing to play basketball, do homework and play safely after school and on weekends.
We need a community funded scholarship fund for kids who can't afford the equipment and fees to play sports.
We need a crisis pregnancy center.
We need a better farmers market.
We need a community funded language learning program. Our Vietnamese, Korean and Hispanic communities in my area are growing like crazy! We need a great way to learn languages and culture. I would love it if language learning became a crazy epidemic here. I would buy the wine for after the language lessons! :D
We are doing better with our crosswalks and bike lanes but we need to educate the community about them.
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Let's say you have time on your hands and a bunch of energy. What would you do to help, change or enhance your community? How would you implement the changes? What needs aren't being met?
I am in a mood and am working on some things in my own community. We started with the question, "what is keeping my community from being the most well educated in the world?" from there, the questions kept coming and the conversation and the participants have grown and developed. Now I want to hear your ideas and thoughts, please! :D
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Karen Armstrong's comparative religion books, starting with A History of God.
I was just getting ready to start things off with this one! Perspective changing, for sure. I also loved The Reluctant Fundamentalist by Mohsin Hamid. His Moth Smoke is on my all time favorite list but maybe not this list.
Another by Karen Armstrong would be 12 Steps to a Compassionate Life.
It is interesting thinking of these books in this way. It seems that I think of many books I wish everyone would read but I don't want anyone to accept any book hook, line and sinker. I want everyone to read all of them to come to their own conclusions. For instance, I am so happy I read Ayn Rand and I am definitely a libertarian. However, I am not an Ayn Rand fan. I believe in helping those who, for whatever reason, can't or won't help themselves. I am not so certain it should always be the government. Rand was sort of a jerk.
I want the whole community where I live to read a whole darn list.
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I need your book suggestions, please! What books do you feel are powerful enough to change people. If you were to compile a dream reading list for the entire world to read so we all could have a different perspective, become empowered and more tolerant, perhaps, and willing to be better people, neighbors, parents, etc. what would you want just your community to read?
You all are awesome, thanks!
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It is my understanding that the OP and her mother are the only adults and both are disabled.
Okay, I am with you now. There are programs in place, you just have to find them. Start making friends, get on some local message boards, find out what is out there for you. I am in a group consisting of people from our local agencies, non profits, churches, etc and we exist to find help for people falling through the cracks. We get together once a month and share the issues we can't solve and see who can. Sometimes we go to a business or individual and just ask them for resources. We just found someone to pay for day care for a year for a 2 year living with a single dad not making enough to pay for day care but too much to qualify for aid. This sort of group may exist in SA, start with Facebook, then move on to churches, then start researching. I hope you find what you need! Lots of love to you. :001_smile:
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I like to solve problems one at a time. I would:
*Catch the house up and stay put. Moving is expensive and at least you KNOW the issues with your house. I bet my cat that another $30,000 house will have more problems than the one you have now.
*treat for termites. It is only going to get worse if you don't.
*one repair at a time, don't get overwhelmed, just do one at a time.
*work on that income, not expenses. You have an income problem.
*don't let little things get in your way and don't try the "geographic solution" because the problems tend to follow you.
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I think it is common for older teens to trick or treat now. I am in a heavy traffic area for the little goblins and ghosts and am really enjoying the older kids, too. Their costumes can be awesome! Last year my daughter and I sat on the porch with candy and got a kick out of the teens dressed like the group LMFAO ( I think that's right) they had a boom box and danced up our driveway!:lol: Halloween is just fun. I don't think it has to stop at a certain age.
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I didn't know Catholics how viewed the wine and bread. I got 31 right but I admit a couple were guesses.
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Tennessee is great. I have BS degree so I just fill out a form and keep attendance :lol: and report grades at the end of the year. No degree? You need an umbrella school. Costs around $30 to $50 yearly. Umbrella schools are usually church related and very hands off.
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Boundary violations, lying, manipulation, and coercion are not mitigated or excused because a person is "devout."
The behavior of the g'parents in the OP are not acceptable, period. End of story.
Any form of "please be understanding" is simply believing that your right to "believe" trumps a another family's right.
And the feedback that the OP's family is not *actually* offering the children a space in which to grow up and THEN decide was uncalled for.
Yep, this. I would add that it won't help to alienate them, just be honest and frank. Now your relationship with them changes and it will be hard on all of you. My mother has been doing this to us for years and she loves to do things for our own good or in spite of us and our immaturity or some such. Now you know you can't trust them on Sundays and Wednesdays. Now you have to constantly discuss those religious views with your kids, which isn't all bad. My oldest are now in college and we have had to have honest and absolutely gobsmacking conversations with them since they were small, we love it. Don't punish the in laws and stop being angry, it only makes you age. Just get over it and know what they will do if given the opportunity and don't let them do it again. Sad, I am sorry.
Funny story. My mil is holy rolling, Pentecostal, Bible thumping and is pushing 80 years old. We are non religious and had to set boundaries with her years ago while respecting and honoring her beliefs. Saturday she was out "soul winning" with her church and evidently they were working my neighborhood. I was inside cooking and my 13 year old and his friends were outside playing basketball. My son came running in the house and handed me a book and said grandma had driven by in her swag wagon and gave him that to give to his dad. :lol: she barely even stopped! We love her, we are happy that's all she feels she can do. Itis a great place that we have come to after many years of being mad and hurt over one thing or another.
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Yea! My daughter read Skinny B!tch, which is oh, so offensive but very informative and fun and convinced my husband to go vegan. Lately fish has crept back in because we are all training for one thing or another and have evidently lost our minds. I think the danger of going back to the old, less healthy ways lies with not having an arsenal of recipes and quick foods. I love vegetarian times. We all get sick if we have ANY dairy now so I love taking recipes with dairy and making a vegan alternative. I make a crazy awesome veggie pot pie. :D a couple of things to remember: you are not a freak, although people will act like it. Don't be picky at people's houses, just be hungry or carry snacks in your purse like I do. No judging, you will look and feel awesome and no one will want you to judge them :D no white bread or flour, very little pasta, cut back or avoid sugar. It is super easy to get really fat eating vegan because the easy foods are those I just listed and they will make you fat. Eat a salad every day. It is good for you and crazy easy. Enjoy your food! Your world will get bigger because you will eat a bigger variety of foods from different cultures! Yea! Thanksgiving solved. I have a veggie strudel recipe for you. Will post later.
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I love that show!!! Sorry...I deal with stressful topics by making myself laugh. Yes I realize I am not funny. But I am funny to me.
It sorta sucks all around. I don't know. My parents divorced and then remarried. I always knew much more then they thought I did.
I do, too. It is crazy and I really seem crazy in stressful situations. A dear friend's father died this week and I was helping clean out his room at the nursing home. All I could do was make stupid jokes and talk about everything under the sun. My husband literally shook his head at me. :confused: this KEEPS happening! I fall part when someone has cancer, is hurt, is sad...except death. I can't keep a straight face.
I don't think there is a right or wrong here, but I would make it a non ordeal by telling the kids. It IS going to come out and you just can't predict their personalities and hang ups and how they will take it later on. If it is part of their family history like:
grandad went to prison for price setting! He is out now and doing fine, he just can't vote.
Mom has a tattoo on her butt that says "Bill forever." Dad's name is John.
Grandma has a prescription pill problem and sings about Obama all the time. We love her anyway.
See what I mean? It is called life and family. We are all human to our children. I wouldn't make a deal about it. It happened. It is history. It is who we all are. ( I don't have a tattoo)
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I have done the glycolic peel, it does make my skin look better. It takes a couple of layers off and healthy skin just looks better! I have a warning, though. Don't drink alcohol and spend an evening doing glycolic peels with you husband, friends and neighbors. The wine makes you more susceptible to severe effects of the peel because of one reason or another. My sweet husband had burns and some scabs....on is face! :001_huh:
I am trying a prescription for retin a cream now. I have only had it for a couple of weeks, I will let you know. I also quit drinking recently so I have no clue how it mixes with alcohol. :D
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Ask him if he would do his job for free for a couple of hours a day for your brother/sister on an ongoing basis. My guess is that he will feel that he would watch their child, but not "work." there's the problem. It is perspective and how we view staying home with children. I would charge since it is a daily thing.
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I think marketing is an ongoing learning experience. I don't have an online business but I own a real estate company. I have to stay ahead of it all the time because marketing changes. Quora is a good place to learn from others, reading books and articles is a must on an ongoing basis. I love Wired magazine and the Wall Street Journal. Duct Tape Marketing is a good book to get you started, too. Many things you read won't seem relevant to your specific business but usually, if you stay with it you will learn something you can use. :)
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Um, when referring to it in this way, please use the proper term, which is Uterine Tracking Device. That is all.
Bahahahahaha!:lol::lol:
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My family is not athletic at all!!!! I want my kids to get some exercise and to learn to defend themselves. I may even join them. Our options are a local TaeKwonDo school that is five minutes away. The regular class teachers are 3rd dan (not sure what that means) with approximately 10 years experience each. The classes range about ten to fifteen students and include all belt levels. I like the teachers, and the school performs EXTREMELY well in competitions. They suggest a minimum for two hours per week, but offer up to four hours for beginners and another two hours per week with the Master for advanced students. They also have a one hour self-defense class for a minimal fee each week.
There is a Krav Maga school about an hour away. I am very interested in this, and it would be a definite if it were not for the drive. The cost is about the same, except for travel expenses. They offer two, one hour classes per week then full-time gym access which we wouldn't use because of the travel.
My goal: exercise is a given. We don't get much elsewhere. But, I also want to develop some self-defense skills in my kids. Is taekwondo worth the effort or should I just go for the krav maga, and deal with the drive twice per week?
I want to learn Krav Maga, too, but it sounds like taekwondo makes more sense? Unless you really, really want to learn Krav Maga and in that case you should. :D
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Eek! I hope that there were no spiders! I can testify to weeks and even months without a full night of sleep. And yes, I can tell exactly where you left your socks, wallet or keys. I have a built in homing device. (Which makes the radioactive spider more likely, doesn't it!)
The "built in homing device" is a uterus. Evidently, you have to have one in order to find lost things. ;)
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We had a date night every week when the kids were small. Now that 2 are away at college and the youngest is busy with sports and friends and old enough to stay home alone we don't go out much. :001_huh: we go for a run, maybe, and stop for Thai food take out to bring home and eat on the couch. It is an unexpected turn of events.
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I grew up in a Southern Baptist household and never heard anything about the evils of Halloween, Smurfs, etc. My dad was a minister! I didn't know people really felt that rock music was evil and literally had demonic messages until some crazies decided to teach a youth retreat I attended. They were supposed to teach something else and knew my dad would protest the rock music is evil topic so they kept it a secret until we got there. I had to sit and listen to all of that while wearing my new Journey concert t shirt, it was confusing. Smurfs? Really? It wasn't until I moved it Tennessee and had my own children that there were entire communities of people avoiding Dirt Devil vacuums, Harry Potter, yoga, and all of the things mentioned before my post.
I respect it. I love that we have the freedom to be fanatical. I love that superstition and religion get all tangled up, it makes life fun. I dislike being judged because I don't believe in Satan or demons or that my Dirt Devil is going to get me. I dislike that my parents don't speak to me or have anything to do with my children because we have grown more liberal while they have grown so conservative that we don't recognize them. It is weird to me how science, religion and politics have all been wrapped up together. I dont remember it being like this or at least to this extreme before. I don't know what is going on in this country but I think we all need to take a deep breath and apologize to one another. :)
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That would have driven me nuts when my kids were that age. Find a new pool?
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I have been vegan for a long time, my husband a daughter are vegan, my sons are not. One son eats every food there is as often as he can :D and the oldest eats dairy products and fish, no beef, poultry, or pork. Cooking is hard here. The older two are away at college so it is easier right now. I like to always have a spinach salad at every meal so my carnivore gets at least that and I cook chicken for him most of the time. I am a short order cook. I always look forward to fall so I can drag the crockpot out. There are some awesome vegan slow cooker recipes out there and this helps me so much. I can start dinner in the morning for the vegans and throw meat on the grill at dinner time for the carnivore. My husband actually recently started eating a little fish again. We are training for a marathon and he says he is just craving it...which is making me crave it...it will be interesting to see how this goes. :glare:
What would you do if you could change your community?
in General Education Discussion Board
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Are you on fb or do you know how to build a site? Why don't you implement one? You just might be on to something!