Good plan. I don't know what I was thinking.

Thanks. :) There aren't any answers, I guess I just have to power through it. I think I'm kicking myself now because I went to the store hungry, and was delighted to find pre-made potstickers that I could bring into the house (no actual allergens for DS, but I wouldn't feed them to him) as a treat for myself... I checked for every ingredient for everyone else, but forgot about wheat. Oops. I ate them last night and spent the night with cramping and feeling ill, and am still feeling the effects. :banghead:

Is there an app for this? My grocery store visits are crazy-making. I am having the worst time keeping up with all of our family members' food requirements. DS8 has been allergic to peanuts, lentils, tree nuts, coconut, sesame, and banana most of his life. Even trace amounts, so those have to stay out of the house completely. I've got that one down due to lots of practice. Now he's developed a wheat allergy. True allergy to wheat, not a Celiac issue - so for him, it's actual wheat not gluten. But we still have to watch for cross contamination with his other allergens. Okay, working on that one, learning. He also has Oral Allergy Syndrome to many raw fruits and veggies, but we can have them in the house, he just can't eat them. Now I have developed allergies to spinach and egg yolk. Ugh. Okay, we can work with that. I am also gluten free, as gluten makes me have terrible stomach cramping though I have not tested positive for Celiac. For me it's not just wheat, but seems to be any gluten at all. I am still learning on this one, so know very little other than how very sick I feel after the tiniest bit of gluten. Now... Doc wants me very low fat, less than 15 gms per day, and vegan if at all possible (to help with inflammation). Of course, since kiddo is anaphylactic to nuts and seeds - those have to stay out the house. Aaaaaahhhhhh! Baby is, at doc's request, avoiding milk products to see if helps the eczema that popped up as soon as we introduced cow's milk. Oh. My. Goodness. The label reading is nuts, excuse my pun, and I find that if I remember one person's requirements, I forget another's! How on earth do you moms who have kids with multiple different food allergies do it??? (I think this was just a rant, but if you have tips, I would welcome them!)

I could have written the above. :) What I love about Apple products is that they work so smoothly together. No fussing necessary. They just do their thing.

You have a good list, I'm not going to add anything big. :) Whenever we are there, we grab a few packs of paper napkins (*gasp!*) because they are nice and inexpensive - for when we use paper. Ditto with packs of straws. DH likes their meatballs (they sell them frozen) but those are on his plate, not mine. I'm not a meatball girl. I can spend way too much time and money in Ikea. :D

Oh, since you aren't likely to declutter their toys, could you do a rotating toy library? Maybe get some big bins and keep the ones they use now out, put some others in the garage, and once a month they can go down and "check out" another bin, as long as they put something else in the garage? (If you have a garage, of course! Basement? Attic?) ...You could even make the checking out of the toy bins tied to something like a chore chart, and if they keep their room picked up for a week, than can check out a different bin? We have bins in our garage, because our kiddo's room is ridiculously tiny. So we do the toy rotation. It does make it fun when it's time to pull out a new bin. I think, too, if you can include them in designing the toy storage system it might help give them some ownership of it, and help them stay motivated. Toy storage is a big issue here, too, and I often think we just have too much, but weeding it out is really hard. :)

It looks like your boys are having a lot of fun in their room! :D If you are going to keep the bunks you have, I like the Expedit option with bins or the Trofast options. I tend to use colored bins rather than clear, because I like the look better. But we keep one type of toy in each bin, and try to get no more than 3 out at a time. (My kiddo does not do well with the one toy out at a time rule, he likes to combine toys.) The bins do end up with some mixed toys, but for the most part this is easier. One thing I like about Trofast is that we can write on the outside with chalk, so they are easy to label and then change later as our needs change. My first choice would be to go with 2 loft beds though, with desks or toy storage and clothing storage underneath for each kiddo. Then you could do some Expedit or Trofast units for shared toy storage.

Oh! I can second Naots. They are great! ...And I do like my Danskos, too. On the question of Birks getting wet, I (unfortunately) have an answer on that one... :) My Birks generally last forever, but last year I had a new pair, and while I was outside, stepped in something yucky. So I left them on our deck, thinking I'd clean them off later. Oops. Wouldn't you know we had a thunderstorm, and I forgot. Days later, I remembered and the tread was separating from the cork. DH took them to have them repaired and got some great info... It wasn't the storm, or getting wet, that caused the problem (like I thought)... But the heat. They were in the sun, and our deck can measure 120 degrees on a really hot day in the sun, it's crazy. The Birk repairman said people bring them in all the time after leaving them in a car, and they have the same damage. I thought that was interesting! Makes sense, too, as I have waded through streams in my other pairs, splashed through rainy days, and fought water battles ... with never a problem. I wouldn't do that in the suede styles, but the others are fine. Oh, and the fake leather never shows anything. Looks new forever. :) Whatever you choose, I hope you find something to keep your feet cozy and comfy.

Once upon a time, I was a traveling artist. :) I did the big art shows up and down the east coast, and would regularly spend 4 days on concrete floors, on my feet. I tried many different shoe options! For me - cork beds were key. Birkenstocks. Or similar brands with cork beds. YMMV, of course.

That always bothers me, but I think it may be a regional thing. I have a friend with excellent grammar who sometimes leaves out the "to be." She feels it's regional as well.

Yes. There is a way to do that. You can be on the deed, whether you are co-signors or not. I am having trouble coming up with the proper term, too, but thinking it might be Joint Tenancy with Right of Survivorship. This might be worth a call to a good estate attorney's office, just to get the info that is specific to your state.

I like being on the same floor as the kids also. My only wish: that the laundry room was also upstairs!

Thanks so much for all the thoughtful replies. I appreciate it, and think I understand a bit better now. He's been on the meds for about a year, although whether they are still adjusting doses/meds - I can't say for sure. I have been very cautious with discussing details with SIL, as I don't want her to feel that I'm another of the nay-sayers in her life. I just want to be supportive. Whatever they are doing has helped his academic performance, so it must be working on that end. I truly wouldn't dream of suggesting that they make changes, because I do know that my SIL is very thorough in her research and very open with their doctors - so I suspect that the doc is well aware of any changes or side effects, and they are addressing them. At least I hope so.

I have a (genuine) question about ADHD meds. I can't ask my SIL about it, because at the slightest hint of a question about ADHD meds, she is off on a rant about how everyone judges her for using meds for my nephew's ADHD, and it makes her angry and upset. I don't want to upset her, or make her feel that I'm questioning her parenting. I'm not. I'm not against ADHD meds, I think no one knows her kiddo the way she does, and I *know* she's a good parent and making the best decisions she can, with the information she has, and with her resources. I love her. :) Here's my question though... Are ADHD meds usually given every day? Or only on days the kids go to school? I don't know enough about the way ADHD meds work, but had imagined that they were taken daily. Is this the norm? My nephew takes meds only when going to school, or on a weekend when there is an "event" (like a party at my parents' house). Otherwise, he does not take his meds. Also, when a child takes their meds... Does it radically change their personality? ...Maybe that's the wrong wording, I'm not sure. My nephew stays himself, he is always a sweet boy, but when he does take his meds, he is ... not just quieter, but ... staring into space a lot. He seems disconnected somehow, and less engaged. I am confused by that, somehow. He certainly is less wiggly and energetic, but also seems ... flat-lined. I worry about him, and want to see him smile again. I'm hoping this came out right. I am truly not against meds for ADHD! In fact, at one point, I was fairly sure my own kiddo needed them. :) I just want to understand better, and asking my SIL is not the way to go. So where else would I turn, but the Hive?

I'm looking forward to hearing more! And would love to hear any more tips on replacements, etc. We are limited by some allergies here, but hopefully I can try most of them. I'm drooling over the coconut milk products, but kiddo is anaphylactic so I will have to save that for outings, alas. My doc wants me to the do the McDougall diet - have you heard of that one? It's to reduce inflammation (for me) but lowers cholesterold/BP, I'm sure. Oh, and no more than 15 gms of fat per day. Eek. It's an adjustment! Maybe we need a (mostly) vegan recipe thread. :D

This is so encouraging! I'm glad you shared your experience. :) I am just heading into vegan territory at my doc's request, and hearing any positive stories is a great encouragement.

Another vote that your 4 year old sounds like a normal 4 year old, especially one who's used to being close to his older brother. :) I totally agree with everything above. My 8 year old was a lot like your 4 year old at that age. Hmmmm. He still is. :D But he is getting better, I can see a lot of improvement in less wiggliness, more concentration when I direct him (he's always been able to concentrate on his own projects, just not necessarily where directed by others, if it doesn't grab his interest). As for coloring in the lines... I'm sure he can. But he would much prefer a blank sheet of paper, and always has. I think that's so much better for developing creativity, so we've never fought that. Maybe your kiddo is just an out of the box, creative kid? For what it's worth, we did have our guy tested for ADHD, and he was not diagnosed. The psych felt that he had some ADHD tendencies, but it just isn't his issue. He got no diagnosis, other than being highly gifted (which we suspected anyway), and some advice on where to go with that. I *was* surprised by his not being ADHD though. And that surprise spurred a lot of research into gifted kids and kinesthetic learning and visual spatial learners and ... The list goes on. It all fits. In fact, rather than jumping into the ADHD worry, maybe it would be more fun for you just to head the other direction and think, "Gifted!" Might make your Mom step back and look at it all differently, too. At this age, I think it could be either one, both, or neither... He's so little. Maybe now is just the time to enjoy your kiddo, with his quirks and energy and creativity... And revel that it is not being trained out of him! Until just a few months ago, we did read alouds with the kiddo flopping upside down, rolling around, doing who knows what. I found it terribly distracting, but he could narrate perfectly (for his age) so he seems to be absorbing the info. He just works best if his body is moving at the same time. Seat work was done on an exercise ball, and handwriting was a chore. But he's better about all of that now, and the exercise ball has been put away. The mini tramp was fabulous for FLL time - again, no longer necessary, but it was essential for a time. Gum chewing was a strange, but useful tip, too, to keep him moving while doing school.

Just popping in to cheer you on. :) Since you don't have a timeline (yet?), just plug away at it every day. Keep sorting. I tend to use freecycle, as our group is very active, and I know that I can put an item on the porch and have it disappear. Plus, I like choosing where items will go, when I'm really emotional about it. Somehow it feels better. We are in the same boat, and I could have written the same posts about our area. We are desperate to leave, as we are fish out of water here, but we have a house full of gorgeous, hand-made items, all with memories attached - and I detest moving. I've moved 30+ times in my life, and at some point just want to stop. I finally decided that the memory is not in the item, it's in my heart. Many items were inherited from my professor/mentor/best friend when she passed away, and many are from my lifetime involved in the art show world, so I know the artist and each piece brings back a series of conversations, dinners out together, fun. I find myself evaluating each piece, and when I'm hung up on the emotion of a piece but it doesn't fit my other objectives (is it beautiful? do I love it? is it useful?)... I find myself repeating over and over, "She is not in this chair, this dish, this [fill in the blank]." It's helped. As for books - that's the hardest. But someone here mentioned that they when they go through their books, they have a "keep" box and a "donate" box. They hold each book and contemplate giving it away. If what they feel is genuine regret because they are going to re-read the book, they keep it. If what they feel is guilt... It goes to the donate box. That helped me a lot. I didn't describe it as eloquently, and probably mangled their technique, so maybe that WTMer will pop in here and clarify! Cheering you on!

We do the above-mentioned... searching (love the "for kids" tip!), the library... but I also go to Brain Pop to see if they have a video on the topic. If you have Brain Pop, it's a great resource that way. We also use our old-fashioned hardback encyclopedias for things that won't be out-dated.

Another non-wheezing asthmatic kid here. Coughing, exhaustion, low peak flows, even bizarre mood changes. He didn't even wheeze when he had pneumonia, with significant retracting, before we knew he had asthma. Just not a wheezer. Chris in VA, we are in No VA, too, I'd love to know the name of your doc who really "gets" it!

Foster Adopt parent here. :) I don't know about the classes that your friend will take, but I do wish that I'd gone into our training classes knowing how emotional they could be, and that in a lot of ways the classes would be painful. We had many people drop out of training when they realized it was not all unicorns and rainbows and happy children bursting with relief to be in a new home. In our classes, even though we were hoping for an infant... we focused on all ages. There were a few particularly rough classes, and I remember feeling sad that the people who dropped out did so... because it did get better. But it is painful to talk about the grief and trauma that these kids live. So, I think, if I knew your friend... I would encourage her to stick it out, to commit to going to all of the classes to get a fair idea of what to expect. I also would encourage her to keep going, despite what she may here about infant foster adopt. We were told, in our classes, that it was a rarity. Yet, within months, an infant was placed with us, and there were several more in our area. We had already discussed it, though, and decided that age 0 - 5 would work for us, with a good support system. We were surprised by the way it all worked out! As for getting ready ahead of time... We did the basics, knowing that we were not sure what to expect regarding gender or age. HTH!

Thanks for the bump. :) My LLMD is finding this in a lot of her chronic Lyme patients who don't seem to recover as well as the others. I was doing wonderfully, but have had a recent setback, and that prompted some new testing. If you want more details before you see your LLMD, just let me know and I can dig up more info for you. Sorry to hear you are having a rough week. It always seems worse after a period of feeling well, to me anyway. Hope you feel better soon!

Hi, I think I've noticed a few of us here, who've had long-term experience with Lyme and co-infections? (I can't be the only one, right?) Has anyone had experience with Stephen Fry's newly discovered protozoa? Protomyxozoa Rheumatica? (Hoping I did not mangle the spelling on that.) I have found this interview with Dr. Fry, and while it's helpful (to an extent), I'd really like to get a patient's perspective on treatment, especially with regard to herxing and homeschooling. And, I admit to feeling a bit daunted by the dietary restrictions, so support there would be a bonus! Actually, I have a ton of questions, but for now, it would just be nice to connect with someone else who's heard of this particular bug. :) PM is fine, if that's more comfortable since this is a public board. Thanks!

I love Cloudcroft and Ruidoso. Lots of great little cabins. :) White Sands is wonderful, as is Carlsbad. All of these, though, are quite a distance apart. Lots of driving, though I never minded... I love NM, and love road trips. :auto: What you decide to do might need to depend on the amount of time you have to spend in the area, and how much of it you want to spend on the road.

I would get one, too. We tend to avoid vaccines, with our doctor's approval & encouragement to do so... but last year when I had an incident with a sharp, metal *something* (no idea what it was, but it was not rusty), even our non-vaccine-touting doctor recommended a tetanus. It's good for 10 years, so at least you won't have to do it again next time!