From Middle Girl's essay: "Most of America was discovered by bicycle or canoe."

Homeschool fail: no dear, not the Calamari Desert.

Texan errors: child misspelled "linden" as L-Y-N-D-O-N

Street in front of our house subsiding. Driveway full of City workers investigating drains & marvelling at sunken spot. No hope of lessons today.

Taking apart dishwasher. 4 screws need torque 15 screwdriver; last screw is T20. Of course. Off to Lowe's...

Middle Girl just recited: "Th' Assyrian came down like a wolf in a Ford..." #notbyron #homeschoolfail

"The Civil War began when the Confederates fired on Ft. Stockton." #Texanhomeschoolfail

Making colonial-era syllabub. Wee Girl: "What next?" Middle Girl: "We must whip it." Me: "Yes, whip it. Whip it good." Only dh finds it amusing.

The perils of teaching about the Labor movement. Dd just chanted at me "8 hours for work, 8 hours for sleep, 8 hours for what we will!"

Dd12, hehad to get done today, just chanted at me "8 hours for work,

If the angels in heaven play Bach on their harps, in hell Bach is played on a suzuki cello.

Middle Girl is practicing 'Endearing Young Charms.' I keep expecting the piano to explode.

Wee Girl, on the way home from church: "A virgin is a mommy who's had a baby but isn't married first. (Smugly) I learned that in Sunday school."