jenn4 Posted April 2, 2009 Share Posted April 2, 2009 When I was a PS teacher we filled out an evaluation each year on students we thought should be tested for the gifted program. Besides the obvious academic questions, we had to also evaluate some of their behaviors. I remember reading that some children are "smart" academically while others are gifted intellectually. I have a dd10 that is very smart but the difference is that she is easy going. My dd7 is on a 5th grade level in all subjects except Math and Writing. She is not at all easy-going! Has anyone noticed certain behaviors in their children they would credit to being gifted? Or am i just grasping at straws because my dd's personality is very strong and sometimes difficult to deal with. The behaviors I am concerned about: 1. Very particular about how words are used. Corrects the family if we mis-use a word. 2.. Gets very angry at her younger brother when he does something against the routine. (she sees rules and procedures in black and white.)This is causing the most problems. A 5 yr old boy just isn't always going to "play by the rules." 3. has had night terrors since 3. She is terrified of sleeping by herself. (I attribute this to reading so far ahead of her grade level, but not being able to deal with the material emotionally.) 4. Is very impatient with others, when they cannot do something. Also very impatient with herself when she can't do something. I would like to know if you have noticed any challenging behaviors in your gifted children. TIA, Jenn4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RJH Posted April 2, 2009 Share Posted April 2, 2009 I have two GT children. DS is very laid back and quiet. But when he does talk, we know it's important, so we all listen. :lol: DD, on the other hand, is the intense gifted child that you read about. Never stops taking, and is very demanding. So my opinion and experience is that gifties come in all personalities. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mandy in TN Posted April 2, 2009 Share Posted April 2, 2009 I would venture to guess that perfectionist tendencies are not exclusively held by gifted children.;) Mandy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted April 2, 2009 Share Posted April 2, 2009 I would venture to guess that perfectionist tendencies are not exclusively held by gifted children.;)Mandy I bet your are correct. I have a perfectionist child....drives me batty....I don't know if he is gifted...probably just very bright, but who knows. What I tell him when he is flipping out over some error he made or answer he didn't know....'hey if you already knew it all there would be no need for me to be teaching you. You could go straight to the job market.' ;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted April 2, 2009 Share Posted April 2, 2009 The behaviors I am concerned about: 1. Very particular about how words are used. Corrects the family if we mis-use a word. 2.. Gets very angry at her younger brother when he does something against the routine. (she sees rules and procedures in black and white.)This is causing the most problems. A 5 yr old boy just isn't always going to "play by the rules." 3. has had night terrors since 3. She is terrified of sleeping by herself. (I attribute this to reading so far ahead of her grade level, but not being able to deal with the material emotionally.) 4. Is very impatient with others, when they cannot do something. Also very impatient with herself when she can't do something. TIA, Jenn4 Except for the night terrors, I see all of the things you listed as character and behavior issues--which all kids have in one form or another. Some are just more pronounced. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Quad Shot Academy Posted April 2, 2009 Share Posted April 2, 2009 My son has or has had most of those issues. I see it as a character issue that needs gentle training. It is no different for him to correct an adult's grammar than it is for my daughter to correct an adult who is eating dinner with us for poor table manners. :blush: I focus a lot on the way he conveys his information: speaking the truth in love, kind words are received better . . . I tell him every day that he is the child and I am the adult and he is to act accordingly. ;) We also talk a lot about how things are not black and white, but shades of grey, but I don't think he gets it yet. I teach him compassion for his younger siblings and tell him that, yes, three year olds are just plain annoying some times, but we have to guide them with love. He did have night terrors when he was very young, 2-6. He was very sensitive to movies. I took him to IKEA once and according to him they forced him to watch the movie that he was not supposed to, Scooby Doo, and he had night terrors for about 6 months. I don't let him read anything that is really scary when his imagination is applied: vampires, ghosts . . . even those little A-Z mysteries because he lets his mind take off! He does fine with real life events and situations though. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LisaKinVA Posted April 2, 2009 Share Posted April 2, 2009 Sometimes, it's not that a particular trait or characteristic is limited to the gifted population ... it's just "more" -- or uncharacteristically "more" than the average child. However, just because they may be "more" -- doesn't give them an excuse for poor behavior, but it can make things a little more difficult to deal with.:tongue_smilie: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jenn4 Posted April 2, 2009 Author Share Posted April 2, 2009 Lisa, that's what I was thinking, that my dd7 is just that...more. More scared, more particular, more sensitive, more impatient ect... Thanks for all your input. I know these are also character issues. It just takes more energy to deal with it all. Add in the dynamics of 4 children and sometimes I just don't have that energy. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DarlaS Posted April 3, 2009 Share Posted April 3, 2009 Is very impatient with others, when they cannot do something. My eldest is like this. He's fifteen now. When he was younger, he also had night terrors. He also had (still does to some extent) sensory issues. I couldn't use a stroller with him because he'd freak out. There are many more odd little things that he's mostly outgrown. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Governess Posted April 3, 2009 Share Posted April 3, 2009 My dd has many of these issues as well. I'm not sure what is attributable to giftedness and what is just based on her personality type. But you are not alone! I could have written your post, and have asked similar questions here myself. It seems to me that giftedness could be a driver behind these behaviors, if gifted kids understand things at an earlier age and don't necessarily have the emotional or social maturity to handle this knowledge. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HeidiD Posted April 3, 2009 Share Posted April 3, 2009 My dd has many of these issues as well. I'm not sure what is attributable to giftedness and what is just based on her personality type. But you are not alone! I could have written your post, and have asked similar questions here myself. I have several "gifted" children also, and they are definitely more challenging to raise. They need far less sleep than the average person, and are intellectually voracious and driven to an exhausting degree. They tend to be more exacting and more explosive than the other kids in the family. From what I understand (and have observed in my extended family), high IQ's are frequently linked with higher-than-average emotional intensity. So in a way, high IQ's can be a double-edged sword. I think it's important to teach them, especially as they get older, how to understand and handle their own emotional intensity and learn to be as balanced and as resilient as possible. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
joannqn Posted April 3, 2009 Share Posted April 3, 2009 I'm finding this thread interesting. My DD is my "gifted" child and has sensory issues that sometimes have a significant affect on the quality of her life. Her fear of water keeps her from learning to swim, properly washing her face, or washing her hair well. Her fear of bees have kept her from leaving the house in the past. Her fear of spiders has prevented her from being able to use the bathroom until DH could come home from work and kill it (I couldn't reach it). She still cries at the dentist office or when the doctor needs to look in her ears. She still has night terrors, sleep walks, and talks in her sleep. Unlike many of the kids here, though, she has no motivation and will only do the bare minimum she can get away with. My DS is totally different. He's worked hard to get to where he is. Even though he's testing about 3 years ahead, I'm not sure if it is because he is motived and works hard, or because he's gifted. He has no sensory issues and seems to have outgrown his night terrors. Getting him to do school work is easy; he often does more than is required. He has an unusual amount of motivation/discipline/focus for things he enjoys like math and taekwondo. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nestof3 Posted April 4, 2009 Share Posted April 4, 2009 The behaviors I am concerned about:1. Very particular about how words are used. Corrects the family if we mis-use a word. 2.. Gets very angry at her younger brother when he does something against the routine. (she sees rules and procedures in black and white.)This is causing the most problems. A 5 yr old boy just isn't always going to "play by the rules." 3. has had night terrors since 3. She is terrified of sleeping by herself. (I attribute this to reading so far ahead of her grade level, but not being able to deal with the material emotionally.) 4. Is very impatient with others, when they cannot do something. Also very impatient with herself when she can't do something. I would like to know if you have noticed any challenging behaviors in your gifted children. TIA, Jenn4 Nathan's night terrors stopped about a year ago. They were not nightmares. He never remembered them and never had a clue what went on. He sleeps with his younger brother, but he cannot go to sleep if I go to sleep while he is still awake. All others traits describe Nathan. He has a radar for improper speech (I can relate). He corrects himself and others. Nathan doesn't really get very angry, but he does like to lead and be in control. He is very emotional, though. He reminds me so much of myself, but I am not gifted. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Storm Bay Posted April 4, 2009 Share Posted April 4, 2009 When I was a PS teacher we filled out an evaluation each year on students we thought should be tested for the gifted program. Besides the obvious academic questions, we had to also evaluate some of their behaviors. I remember reading that some children are "smart" academically while others are gifted intellectually. I have a dd10 that is very smart but the difference is that she is easy going. My dd7 is on a 5th grade level in all subjects except Math and Writing. She is not at all easy-going! Has anyone noticed certain behaviors in their children they would credit to being gifted? Or am i just grasping at straws because my dd's personality is very strong and sometimes difficult to deal with. The behaviors I am concerned about: 1. Very particular about how words are used. Corrects the family if we mis-use a word. 2.. Gets very angry at her younger brother when he does something against the routine. (she sees rules and procedures in black and white.)This is causing the most problems. A 5 yr old boy just isn't always going to "play by the rules." 3. has had night terrors since 3. She is terrified of sleeping by herself. (I attribute this to reading so far ahead of her grade level, but not being able to deal with the material emotionally.) 4. Is very impatient with others, when they cannot do something. Also very impatient with herself when she can't do something. I would like to know if you have noticed any challenging behaviors in your gifted children. TIA, Jenn4 Both my birth siblings and I are all somewhere in that top 2 percentile (we vary between us). However, my brother is very laid back overall. He does get VERY competitive (learned this from his friends when I went to his wedding) and he does have his quirks. But in his field (acting) he is, in the words of his LA manager, "the opposite of a prima donna." He was a very fussy eater when he was young, though, thought a lot about death when he was in kindergarten, etc, etc. But Mr. Popular at school and in sports. We've seen all of the things you've mentioned in our dc, although not all in all of them. If there were more symptoms, I might think Asperger's, but this isn't nearly enough, IMO, to think that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cougarmom4 Posted April 7, 2009 Share Posted April 7, 2009 Ah, yes, the challenges of having a gifted child. I agree with the posts that say that quite often in gifted children, these types of characteristics are simply 'more' than others. If you haven't had one with these types of challenges, it's hard to understand how frustrating & completely exhausting it is. If you have one like this, you just wish you could find someone who says, "Oh, my goodness...I'm right there with ya!" I have found various articles at the seng website to be extremely helpful. Seng stands for Supporting Emotional Needs of the Gifted. In my case, I could figure out how to meet my son's advanced academic needs, but the emotional side of it has been by far the most challenging thing I've ever done. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
VanessaS Posted April 8, 2009 Share Posted April 8, 2009 Dabrowski's Overexcitabilities: http://www.sengifted.org/articles_social/Lind_OverexcitabilityAndTheGifted.shtml Yes, my kids are the poster-children for this... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Storm Bay Posted April 8, 2009 Share Posted April 8, 2009 Dabrowski's Overexcitabilities: http://www.sengifted.org/articles_social/Lind_OverexcitabilityAndTheGifted.shtml Yes, my kids are the poster-children for this... Thanks! My kids, too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.