SOS improving writing tutor or ?

[sbgrace]

Please don't quote this. I am looking for help, but feel like I failed my kid.

Once he hit high school one of my seniors became very difficult to teach writing to. I outsourced to a coop. He was praised for his writing ability and made good grades. They used EIW based curriculums almost exclusively. I have no excuse for my hands off that subject approach, except he was very hard headed when I tried to give him feedback previously. The first coop year I tried to give him feedback on assigments and it was miserable. He felt my standards were too high and the tension was harming our relationship. I continued to teach writing to his sibling but just relied on the coop for him. 

In working on college essays with him early this year, I became concerned. It feels he has actually gone backward.  I tried to help him and it was just full of tension and yuck. I enrolled him in a 101 comp class at the local community college this spring, hoping someone else would provide feedback and a reality check. I feel he needs to put more effort into it--he just thinks whatever he writes is "good enough," and apparently it was for his teachers. After a tutoring session today, I am not sure he's going to get great feedback. He asked me to look at his essay just prior to the appointment. In my glance, I told him I see lack of antecedents in spots and many of his paragraphs lacked topic sentences. He may have had one that even lacked a cohesive topic. 

The campus tutor felt his writing was great. He said he couldn't make any suggestions--was there any concerns in particular he needed? My son asked about whether the tutor felt he had topic sentences....the response was kind of "oh, I hadn't thought of that....um...hmmm...well, in this paragraph, if you want a topic sentence maybe use this sentence in the middle of the paragraph...I'm not sure ...etc" My son walked away saying well, see mom--he liked it. 

My "high" standards aside, I think there are major weaknesses that are going to possibly really hurt him in college. 

So, my SOS: I want to prepare him as best I can for college writing in the little time we have left. He will not listen to my feedback. Does anyone know of a good tutor or something else to help him accurately evaluate his writing and improve weaknesses?

I feel so stressed and frustrated with him.

 

Edited January 27, 2023 by sbgrace

[freesia]

If I am understanding correctly, he is a second semester senior taking a dual enrollment English class at a college? I think at this point you need to let the chips fall where they may. Likely, the professor will mark down the same areas that you see. At that point it is on him. You can offer your help. My 17 year old boys weren’t hugely open to my help at this point in their school careers. They are moving on. If it helps any, I arrived at a highly selective school with poor writing skills bc the excellent English teacher retired just before I entered. I had a huge learning curve, but found friends to help and graduated with honors. So, really, I think it’s on him right now. I’m sorry you are so stressed, though. I wish I could fix it. 

[Momto6inIN]

I agree with freesia.

Maturity will help, if that makes you feel better 🙂

[Momto6inIN]

Also - I'm sure you already know this, but you did *not* fail your kid. He's succeeding in a CC. He may not write like you want him to write, but he's not failing and neither are you 🙂

[freesia]

43 minutes ago, Momto6inIN said:

Also - I'm sure you already know this, but you did *not* fail your kid. He's succeeding in a CC. He may not write like you want him to write, but he's not failing and neither are you 🙂

Thanks for saying this. I agree OP. 

[Farrar]

Seconding all the advice above, especially that you didn't fail this kid. At this point, I'd actually consider the possibility that your standards and expectations are off in some way. I hear you that key things were missing. And freshman comp courses at community colleges can be deficient sometimes. But he has had a bunch of outsiders look at his writing and find it fine for the context they're considering. The writing that students do in college now isn't always in line with what we think it will be. 

[KSera]

Does he have the time and want to brush up his writing skills before college? If he does, one of the 8 week high school essay classes from Lantern English could be a good fit for that situation. They are quite focused and specific in laying out having a thesis, having topic sentences in each paragraph, supporting those topic sentences, using transitions, and all the basic essay skills. They aren't a ton of work either, so might be a good fit for this scenario if he does have some extra time and is up for it. FWIW, we have found dual enrollment English 101 classes to be a step backward in expectations as well. My kids have all gotten very high marks in them with very little feedback. As the other say though, it may be that he's actually perfectly well prepared for college writing.

[ByGrace3]

I have a similar situation with my ds -- he does not receive my feedback well so we outsource. DE Composition classes definitely are not up to my expectations. I often wonder if my expectations are too high. On another note, we have had great luck with Lantern English if your ds actually wants to improve his writing, the 8 week classes are great and offer solid feedback. If he doesn't and thinks he is ok, I would let it go and let his maturity grow on his own. 

[sbgrace]

Thank you all. My expectations are definitely higher than the community college. Whether they are higher than what will be expected of him next year, I don't think nearly so much. But I need someone else to give him good feedback. I am going to check into Lantern English--thank you!

ETA: I think he will be amiable to an 8 week course. Which Lantern English should I select?

The assignments he has in community college are pretty sophisticated and solid. The grading and feedback is just not good at all...everything is great and an A. It's giving him the opposite impression I hoped for! 

 

Edited February 2, 2023 by sbgrace

[ByGrace3]

On 2/2/2023 at 12:07 AM, sbgrace said:

Thank you all. My expectations are definitely higher than the community college. Whether they are higher than what will be expected of him next year, I don't think nearly so much. But I need someone else to give him good feedback. I am going to check into Lantern English--thank you!

ETA: I think he will be amiable to an 8 week course. Which Lantern English should I select?

The assignments he has in community college are pretty sophisticated and solid. The grading and feedback is just not good at all...everything is great and an A. It's giving him the opposite impression I hoped for! 

 

I would think any of the advanced writer courses would be good. I would probably start with Expository writing 1 (which usually does a rough draft one week and edits the next) or if you want to move faster the expository essay fast track which does all of it in one week. 

[freesia]

12 minutes ago, ByGrace3 said:

I would think any of the advanced writer courses would be good. I would probably start with Expository writing 1 (which usually does a rough draft one week and edits the next) or if you want to move faster the expository essay fast track which does all of it in one week. 

I agree. I would recommend the slow track because they have to revise their papers which is where he’ll need to pay attention to errors. My present teen boy won’t really look at corrected papers to learn from them unless he has to rewrite. 

[teachermom2834]

I just want to mention that I always thought my kids’ writing was lacking and then their college instructors sent the other students to them for help and recommended them for jobs in the writing lab, etc. I still haven’t made sense of it. 
 

My highest achiever is a college sophomore right now and he gets comments like “wow!” anytime he has written work (he is in business STEM courses). Yet, he sends me things to proof sometimes and I just cringe and feel so embarrassed by his writing.

So I have no specific advice other than to just let him make his way now. He is probably doing just fine. If he is not, he is one of many that will need support and it will be available.