Tips for dealing with dawdling?

[qfbrenda]

I need help getting my 11yr old son to move faster before I lose my mind. He has a very reasonable list, in fact it's shorter than I want it to be. But he's making it take forever. I don't get the feeling that he's being rebellious, though that's possible. He's just found off in la-la-land way too often. :tongue_smilie:

 

He's doing:

 

BJU math 5 (almost 6)

BJU math review book

Calculadders (yes, he still needs it)

Sequential Spelling 2

Rod & Staff English 5

MFW Ex to 1850 for history and science

 

Sometimes:

 

logic

Writing Strands

science kits

[TundraAcademy]

We ran into that same thing recently. My husband came up with an incentive chart. They receive 5 points if they get their work done by 2pm. They can also get a bonus point for getting their work done early, asking "what's next?", or being helpful to each other (among other things). We set up a rewards chart based on these points. They both just accumulated 100 points and earned toy electric guitars. We sat down together to come up with the rewards. They could have gotten smaller rewards at lower points (like baseball cards), but they decided to hold out for the guitars!

 

The tricky thing is to not let them accumulate points too quickly (then we'll be broke!). We set a maximum of 7 points per day.

 

This may sound pretty goofy, but it actually has worked and made a huge difference in our days. Now I don't feel like I'm nagging them all day long. I just tell them it is up to them and if they don't get done by 2pm they still have to do the work, but just won't earn any points. They also can't watch TV or have friends over until it is done. Now we've gotten into a routine of getting things done earlier and it doesn't seem to take as much effort.

 

Hope this gives you some ideas!

:001_smile:

[wide eyes & laughter]

If so, have you tried to help him pick up speed in areas other than school work? Has anything you've done helped so far?

 

My ds9 drives me a little crazy, too, w/his "slow ways". We work on it mostly by inspiring him w/his own success stories - every once in a while, I'll say how much he's improved in the area of showing initiative, for example. That inspires him to reach for more.

 

My son's slow ways are due to his temperament; he's analytical. Sometimes he appears apathetic about something, but now I realize he's thinking, thinking, always thinking ;) His wheel-works are always going. He does care (not apathetic) and wants to understand things, so puts a lot of thought into whatever he is doing/learning. Dh and I often ask him to acknowledge us after we've given a set of instructions just to make sure he was listening - since he doesn't always look like he is!

 

Just throwing some thoughts out there!

[dhudson]

I use a timer. I set a reasonable amount of time for each task then if my son isn't done in that time frame he gets to do it for "homework" after I am off the teacher clock. He can't have any free time or computer time or lego time until it's done. After a few days of this, he usually straightens up pretty quickly.

[qfbrenda]

Yes, he does tend to be slow. Overall, he isn't a wise user of time. But that's probably a common trait in 11 yr old boys LOL. So we're working on his speed in other areas as well as with school.

[elegantlion]

Yes, he does tend to be slow. Overall, he isn't a wise user of time. But that's probably a common trait in 11 yr old boys LOL. So we're working on his speed in other areas as well as with school.

 

I had a rather long discussion with my 11 year old ds about time management today. We tend to revisit this conversation every couple of months. For us I believe some of it is training and some of it is being 11.

 

Sometimes I think is testing my commitment to his education. Today he learned that I am serious about it. :D

[AnnetteB]

We "race" the timer sometimes, too. One of the children needed an extra incentive once and we set the timer for math lessons and every minute left on the timer earned her a penny (my kids work cheap). I paid up immediately and so didn't have to keep track of anything.

[kbpaulie]

Yes, he does tend to be slow. Overall, he isn't a wise user of time. But that's probably a common trait in 11 yr old boys LOL. So we're working on his speed in other areas as well as with school.

 

Sorry, no help from me. Just sympathy.

 

A couple days ago I was going to post a similar question about my 6 year old son seeming to waste away his time. I get so frustrated b/c he's wasting MY time too. It never seems intentional. Just as someone said, "La-La". I noticed that everyone that has responded so far are parents of boys. Is this only a boy thing?

 

Sometimes we joke that we homeschool b/c we wouldn't get to the bus on time. Sometimes I really do believe that's true. LOL!:tongue_smilie:

 

 

KB

[WTMCassandra]

I really feel for you. My 10yo was born on the slow speed--he's always been this way. I call my life "Homeschooling the Hare (DD) and the Tortoise (DS)." It's especially difficult for subjects where we are working together, such as Latin, History, etc.

 

We use a timer, and honestly, I'm on his case a lot to move faster. I haven't found anything fun or inspiring. Sometimes I'm exhausted because I feel I have pushed/pulled him through the day, while simultaneously being on his sister's case for her to to slow down, do a complete job, redo for neatness, etc. I'll be watching this thread too.

[Penelope]

Sorry, no help from me. Just sympathy.

 

A couple days ago I was going to post a similar question about my 6 year old son seeming to waste away his time. I get so frustrated b/c he's wasting MY time too. It never seems intentional. Just as someone said, "La-La".

 

I am in the same boat. Six year old boy. I try, try try to make the lessons short a la Charlotte Mason. But honestly, it SHOULD only take him 10 minutes to copy 2 sentences, not 50 minutes. Agh! It does only take 10 minutes when he sits, begins right away, and stays in one place until he is done. But no, it is look around the room for 10 minutes first, take 5 minutes to sharpen his (already sharp) pencil, flip the pencil around a bit. Then write two words, look up and start asking about something he wants to do later, decide to get up get a drink/go to the bathroom/get something from his room (which is not allowed until he is done with a subject but he tries to do it anyway). Multiple reminders on my part to focus and keep his eyes on his paper. Et cetera. :toetap05:

 

I find it especially frustrating because I have two younger children to care for whom I also wish to spend time with (I try to be right there for his copy to catch mistakes). He is quick with math, but anything to do with writing involves much dawdling.

[MerryAtHope]

Something that helps my kids--sometimes we'll race. I'll say, "who can get done faster, you with your math, or me with xyz chore? Ready...Go!" Now, I did remind the first few times that fast but sloppy or fast but careless mistakes would mean they'd have to re-do it. The competition seems to keep my kids focused when needed.

 

Another thing I've done is end the topic at the time & said the rest is homework for during their scheduled free-time. That doesn't happen too often, they want to have their freetime (insert their favorite activity here).

 

Hang in there! Merry :-)

[Laura Corin]

I make Calvin set himself a time period for finishing each task - he has a timer on his watch. If I forget to remind him to, it can take him two hours to do six maths problems. He sometimes asks me for advice on how long to allow, but usually he sets himself tight times and more or less meets them.

 

Laura

[Christine]

I use a timer. I set a reasonable amount of time for each task then if my son isn't done in that time frame he gets to do it for "homework" after I am off the teacher clock. He can't have any free time or computer time or lego time until it's done. After a few days of this, he usually straightens up pretty quickly.

 

 

:iagree:

 

Further, I had to do this with my two older sons who were each about this age. (I believe you said 11?) I suspect I'll have to do it with my two younger sons about that age too. (It's a theory, I won't really be "testing" it for ~ 4-5 years.)

[inashoe]

In our home it is definitely a boy thing - the slow-ies struck my each of my ds around 6.

Incentives work with us, I tried the timer, but I wasn't able to keep it up - it depended

too much on me. dc all start with math first thing and we break around 10am for a small snack.

ds can only join us if they are done with their math - now I have no more math problems. :)

 

ds6 has never had any problems, academically or developmentally, until about two weeks ago

he suddenly slowed to a crawl, dawdling, staring into space, dropped the dishes one afternoon.

This must be a developmental thing. Out of the blue he worked one day from 9am to 4pm on his Math !

 

dd8 finishes her work way ahead of the others, I honestly don't think she is any more bright

than her brothers, just gets things done quickly and without any fanfare.