Impossible to Get it All Done

[PandaMom]

I'm finding it impossible to get everything done with DD's schooling that should be done. She goes to therapy 3 days per week. We are dealing with ASD, ADHD, anxiety, cognitive delays, mixed expressive-receptive language disorder, and possible CAPD. She is 10 y/o and I have her officially at the third grade level and she is doing her lessons at the 2nd-3rd grade level. We take things slowly because it does take longer for her to really learn something. The things we work on now are math, spelling, grammar, reading, comprehension, and phonics. We finished up with Dancing Bears before the Christmas holidays. We have no time for science or social studies and I feel bad but there just isn't time. Any advice from those who have BTDT? Anyone else in a similar situation as I am? I know that I can do only so much with her with the time I have after her therapy but I do feel bad that she is missing out on something she might be interested in.

 

Susie

DD 10 y/o

[Innisfree]

Oh, yes! In fact I posted about this a while back. We're in much the same boat as you: dd11 has ASD, anxiety, sensory issues, and can be a slow learner. It seems like therapy eats up our days, but the therapy is necessary. I wish I had answers to offer, but sympathy I've got in abundance.

[PeterPan]

My ds is in a similar position, where we spend seemingly more time going to therapies and doing at home therapies than we do academics.  And it feels so wrong/imbalanced, because in his case he actually *is* quite academically hungry.  But I take consolation that we're doing what needs to be done.  It wouldn't do him any good if I gave him xyz great experiences and didn't get his speech or ability to self-regulate in order, sigh.  And we're making progress, but yes it's almost like you're not homeschooling when you're homeschooling, especially if you compare yourself to what other people on K-8 are doing.  Comparing will not help, sigh.

 

What I do?  Well I try to give him lots of access to audiobooks, because in his case audiobooks are an input that works for him.  Does your dd have an input that works well for her?  If she uses headphones/earbuds, does audio work?  Are videos (with headphones) better?  Is doing and touching better?  So that's one thing, to bulk her up in her spare time on the types of inputs that *do* work.

 

The other thing is I made a list of my like to get dones.  For us that's science, art, state study, etc.  Then I told myself ok, once a week would be better than nothing.  And if we get to a couple of those once a week (stolen hour here, stolen hour there), then I got a couple things done, kwim?  Sort of accepting that a little is better than nothing, that simple once a week things add up and can be memorable.  Does she have something she likes, like maybe zoo trips or museums?  Whatever she would connect with, maybe try to put that on a little rotation, once a week, once a month.  It's so easy to discount the value of things done just a little, but they really can be good.  Our music therapy is only 1/2 hour a week (and very innocuous to watch), but WOW the cumulative difference over a semester!  

 

I do give him time to watch science things on tv.  He likes to watch shows about animals, building, things on the science channel, mythbusters.  That's an input that works well for him.

 

Another thing I do is worthwhile apps.  So he's getting leisure time (one of our cards on our visual schedule!) and I know we're hitting our goals.  I just got him a nifty hangman app that was free on amazon underground.  It's android.  We've been playing a lot of spider solitaire (the app) and I just tried physical cards with him, which was fun.  I got low vision cards that have really big numbers after seeing them in some of Ronit Bird's stuff.  They're Marinoff low vision playing cards.  To me, when we play card games, do apps, build k'nex, I'm hitting multiple goals at once.  We're working on social skills and self-regulation for our ASD.  We're working on skip counting for our math.  We're working on speech (because I make sure we use lots of speech with our interactions!).  And, frankly, it's relaxing to me.  A stable mom is a better mom.  

 

Do you have some kind of read aloud time together?  Do picture books work for her?  My ds does well with DK picture encyclopedia books.  He likes the Can You Find It? art books.  I'm able to sneak art, science, history into those, but I'm also getting visual processing skills and speech.  And you don't have to do that a LOT to have some benefit.  Like, if I'm really really on top of things, we're only going to get to do that twice a week.  The other days of the week we literally CAN'T.  We normally have appointments that taking us out of the house three days a week!  But even just 10 minutes that twice a week (and that's like wow, we're really getting everything done, not how it usually is, lol) is enough that it sort of adds up.  

 

Are you using a visual schedule?  It helps me a lot to have one.  Because we have SO many appointments and are in and out so much, I have to be really honest with my schedule.  It helps me to focus and steal snippets of time too, because I know ok, I really have one hour here and one hour there, what could we get done.  And if I'm not getting things done with him, am I giving him inputs that work for him (in his case earbuds and a kindle) so he can get input (audiobooks, TC lectures, quality apps, whatever) while we're on the road?  But for me, I had to write it all out and get really honest about what we could get done.  Like if I lose that hour in the morning, that really was our chance for the day.  But if the day isn't going like I hoped (he's stuck, he's perseverating, whatever), we can flex that and still try to use that hour another way.  (card games, k'nex, worthwhile apps together, whatever)

[Innisfree]

Something we do is try to use games whenever possible to supplement and reinforce academics. We're accumulating math games, some history, some that reinforce goals from OT. They don't induce anxiety the way a sheet of math problems does, but they do help reinforce the knowledge at the same time we're practicing social skills.

[Heathermomster]

OP, you are doing terrific.  Maybe pop in a SOTW audio while in the car and read a page from a science encyclopedia on a Saturday and call it good.  You are doing school and it looks very similar to many women on the boards.  

 

I am just now looking at my calendar.  We've had 7 appointments over the last 11 days and that doesn't include sports practice or violin.    :grouphug:  :grouphug:  :grouphug:

Edited January 21, 2016 by Heathermomster

[kbutton]

I agree with prioritizing what you've been doing. You can be sneaky with games, vidoes, etc. to get in science and other stuff (PBS!!!).

 

Also keep in mind some things you might do if your load lightens during the summer--visiting a living history sort of place (pioneer village, etc.), taking nature walks, etc. might be something you can swing from time to time in the nice weather. If you garden, you might get some science out of doing ordinary garden work. 

 

If summer is equally busy, or you just need a break, don't sweat it.

[Hilltopmom]

We did documentaries, read alouds, video games, SOTW audio, lots of audiobooks, lots of art, dance classes, 4H, field trips for many years, in addition to just the basics- 3 Rs, all remedial.

 

Now, at 13, this is our first year doing schooly history & science.

 

History we are using a simple spine (Queens US history) with historical fiction audio books & read alouds. And watching Story of US & other documentaries.

Science we're doing a hi lo workbook & watching documentaries too.

We could've done those years ago, but she would not have gotten anything out of them, I don't think.

 

I also had her make a list of things she wants to learn about this year to rotate through loop style-

Artist studies, composer studies, ballet study, author study...

 

We don't do everything every day & with therapies & dr appts, school doesn't happen every day.

 

It's been nice to finally get to do fun stuff, not just remedial math & ELA!