For Those Who Can't Wait to Homeschool!

[carriede]

Here's a post from one of my favorite homeschool bloggers for those who know they want to homeschool, but their babies are still young.

 

http://lifeasmom.com/2013/09/i-cant-wait-to-homeschool-or-how-to-prepare-for-teaching-your-kids-at-home.html

 

This is timely for me. We're taking a break from our gentle prek, and while I don't feel TOO bad about doing so, this post makes me feel better.

[ThisIsTheDay]

Call me jaded, but my first response when I saw your subject line was, "Well, just wait ten years!"

 

;)

[beth83]

I think the problem is the lack of community at that age, especially when it is your first.  

 

We knew we were going to homeschool.  We moved to an area full of homeschoolers when my oldest was 2.5 years old.  Unfortunately, you aren't viewed at legitimate until your oldest if 5 years old here.  They will not even let you participate in park dates.  I understand that they want to weed out the mothers who claim they homeschool by only homeschooling preschool, but what was I suppose to do?  I joined a neighborhood mothers group and for the 2-3 age range, all conversations revolved around what preschool/elementary your child was going to attend.  Often they would just look at me like I was crazy when I said we would be homeschooling.  The one friend we made that year, we ended up losing to her school schedule the next year.  It was a hard year.  I hit a really dark point, as I felt like we didn't have any friends.  We are social people and there was just nowhere we fit, because the one group that we would actually fit in told us we weren't welcomed yet.

 

In a different way, my best friend (We have friends now, thank goodness!) was deeply embedded in her neighborhood with all the other moms.  They all had children at the same time and did everything together when they were little.  The other kids slowly got more involved in MDO programs and they just started dropping my friend.  It was no fault of anyone's.  They just started hanging out with school families more.

 

So this leaves my friend and I, at this point, begging for homeschooling to start.  We needed SOMETHING.  By the Lord's provision we found each other during this time and lamented on this challenging period.  I think it would have been different if we had some kind of group.  A group to keep us active and busy.  A group that we knew we would still have once school started, or a that we wouldn't be kicked out of because we were going a different path.  A group of like minded individuals.  Is that too much to ask?

 

We joined CC at 4 years old because we needed a community so badly.  We needed some kind of identity.  The older mothers didn't understand.  "Don't rush," they would say.  "Enjoy this age."  "Why are families so rushed to join CC?"  One of these mothers had been homeschooling her down syndrome son years before her daughters came into the picture.  She already had a community.  The other mother pulled her kids out of elementary school to homeschool.  They never experienced this period of exclusion, either.

 

My friend and I have taken a strong interest in the mothers who are in the "waiting" period.  We are starting park play dates soon that won't be exclusive.  There are so many homeschoolers who don't do MDO programs and need a group, of sorts.  It is a hard time.  Those women need something.

[FishMama]

Gwen, I'm so glad that you were encouraged by my post. If I can't talk to 28yo me, at least maybe I can share what I wish I had done with other moms like her.

ThisIsTheDay, I totally get you! 

Beth, you make a great point about community.

[momacacia]

This seems to be a big firstborn issue. Or should I say, the parent of a firstborn/only-so-far issue. Where we are now, I'd love to just stop CC and read and cuddle, not "have" to do K4 with 4yo so that she gets some time with me during the day (between 8yo and baby) and cease and desist the music lessons, etc. 8yo. And yeah, I feel like I am torturing 4yo by putting her in CC so 8yo can do it. But, 4yo so wants her own things, and honestly without them I think would get lost in the middle. Is she being rushed? No, but I have to work hard to make time to show up for what she is ready for, whereas with firstborn I worked hard to be ready for "the next thing!!!" with her.

 

I suspect baby boy, probably our last, will get dawdled with even more. "Oh, no sweetheart, you don't want to learn to read. Sit right here and let Mommy read to you. I know we were just at the zoo yesterday, but we really should go again today, since we missed the giraffes." ;)

[mathmarm]

The social limbo you find your self adrift in, sucks.

[musicianmom]

Totally agreeing with everything beth83 said.

 

When you know from the beginning you're going to homeschool, then you're a weirdo from the beginning.

 

I am so thankful that my town has the best homeschool support group on the planet, seriously, and that they accepted me with open arms when my oldest was only 2. Because you know what? I almost chickened out on hs when it was time for kindergarten. One of the factors that kept me going was that dd already had made some friends who I knew would be hs also. So I did not have that feeling of isolation.

[Mom0012]

Yes, I remember being the crazy lady working in the homeschool coop nursery with my 3 yo and 1 yo. Part of it was just wanting to see what this whole homeschool thing was about and part of it was trying to find a place we would belong.

 

But, yeah, I get the "just wait ten years" comment as well.

[duckens]

Beth83, thank you for starting a community for the pre-homeschoolers in your area.

 

There is also how tough it is one preK kids in limbo before homeschooling.

 

We, also, knew we wanted to homeschool by the time dd6 was an infant.  She had friends through the co-op preschool in town (ages 3.5 to 5.5), but everyone else went to public school.  While here classmates were excitedly talking about which K they would attend and reading "first day of school" books, dd6 was adrift at explaining that we were going to homeschool....something she had never done or seen.

 

I got very lucky in the last months of preschool and through the summer to meet homeschoolers at social events.  Driving home, I would point out that G and S (whom she had played with) were also homeschooled.  Or H is also homeschooled.  It helped her to realize that she could have friends in homeschooling, too.