young-for-their-grade boys, does it ever work?

[twoxcell]

My ds has a July b-day so he is fairly young for his grade. So far he is doing great! The only thing I would day he is behind in is spelling but I don't think that is due to age. He is a big kid so even though he is the youngest he is usually about the tallest on his sports teams.

[boscopup]

I agree. There are some public school districts in the next county that have a September 30th cut-off. However, I don't know of anyone that does not "redshirt" a child with a summer birthday, let alone a birthday in September. From what I have been told, the administrators advise parents of kids with summer birthdays to delay entree into K even if they meet the school's cut-off date.

 

At a Christmas family get-together, I met a woman and 2 of her grandsons. The older boy was the same age as my son. When I said my son was in 3rd grade, she was really confused and said that he should be in 2nd grade. I said no, he has a June birthday. He's 8. He's supposed to be in 3rd grade. She said her grandson also had a June birthday and was 8, and that the school had told them to start K at age 6. I've never heard of that happening around here, though I know it's common for parents to redshirt for summer birthdays. I didn't redshirt my son. He only had one kid younger than him in his class at school, and several classmates were a year older because they were redshirted simply because they had summer birthdays. I think it was about half and half, redshirt vs. not.

 

We have a Sept. 1 cutoff here. DS1's due date was Sept. 10, so he could have been born after the cutoff, but he decided to come in June. Academically, I can't even imagine sending him to K at age 6. So glad we're homeschooling now!

[CatholicMom]

I was barely 5 when I started school and my mom wondered if she should hold me back and then decided not to. Later on, she wished she had done it. I did have some problems in school... never got horrible grades, but had a hard time catching on and always felt a bit behind. I think many things came into play. If I started school one year later I think it wouldn't have solved all my problems but might have helped me keep up. I graduated when I was 17.

 

For public school, I would err on the side of holding back. For homeschool, I would just label according to the law and teach to his abilities. Comparisons don't come into play as much while homeschooling (thank goodness) and in reality there is a fine, gray line between each grade, which you can use to taylor your school to your child if you're homeschooling.

[musicianmom]

Thank you everyone. I feel better now about keeping him on track for starting K officially at 5.

[GSOchristie]

My 3 year old has an August birthday, and I'm not starting kindy until he is 6. Like others have said, not only is he young, but he is tiny (7th percentile for height). He is also way more clingy and babyish than my older son was at this age. So we will start CC with him, in the Abecedarian class, at 6. He is smart academically, so he will probably be reading by that point, but I'm not doing a structured kindergarten with him until then.

[catz]

i sent my son to school for kindergarten despite meeting the cut-off by only 3 weeks. He was not interested in reading but was very advanced in math, and it seemed silly to keep him at home another year. he had a terrible year - because of behavior. He is a very immature class-clown sort of kid. he was seriously traumatized. I admit that much of the school i did with him the first 2 years was very light, except for math of course. He has been consistently a year or two or more above grade level in math, and a year or two behind in language arts. i cant imagine dropping him a year back before going back to school, but i also cant imagine him being mature enough any time soon . . . for any grade lol

 

 

 

My oldest went to K and 1st grade. Honestly, I knew nothing about GT and accelerated kids when I sent him and never thought about sending him early with an October birthday. I thought he would be one of the oldest in his class - nope. There were 5-6 kids older than him, mostly boys with spring to summer birthdays. Honestly, the kids with summer birthdays the following year struggled with the tedious more structured nature of all day academic based K. My old K kid was so done at the end of every day. My kid also hit the ceilings of the school's gifted screener, we had a hard time keeping him engaged once he took off reading (he was very ahead in math before K), and so we pulled him.

 

I'm still calling that kid a 6th grader. He's small for grade, enjoys extracurriculars, etc. He's doing algebra 2, as an example. However, I don't want to put him up against 9th or 10th graders in terms of focus and speed academically.

 

Kids at school are at all sorts of levels. There were kids in my son's K class just learning the alphabet, and others reading at 5th or 6th grade level. I really don't think reading and doing math ahead of grade level at K necessarily tells you that a kid is going to be ready to be shipped off to college a year sooner. I think it depends on your mind set about it, but even at 6th grade, I haven't made a change yet for my kid. Meeting your kid academically where they are and adjusting accordingly is part of the beauty of homeschooling IMO.

[beaners]

We will be looking at this in a few years. I have two boys with August birthdays. The school district we would attend has an August 1st cut-off. Some of the adjacent county's schools have a cut-off of September 30th. The property across the road from us fronts the other county, so we are literally right on the line.

 

I entered Kindergarten at 4 with an October birthday. A friend of mine did also, although he is a couple days older than me. He had no problem succeeding during and beyond high school. I think he might be in bio-med engineering or something similar? He did drive our lovely 3rd grade teacher to tears on an almost daily basis.

[newbieoftwo]

I live in Texas where red-shirting is very common. Even kindergarten teachers recommend to hold August birthdays back a year. The local private school actually has a July 1st cut-off date that is enforced until 3rd grade! If it was less common where I live, I would have probably sent DS to public school Kindergarten this year, but his father and I decided not to send him to a class with students that were up to a year and a half older than him. He just wasn't ready emotionally for that experience. If I could continue to homeschool him (shared custody blows!), I would simply continue to meet him at his level and not declare a grade until much later.

[Mommy_of_4]

If you are homeschooling I don't see the point of red shirting. Just meet your child where they are and report them (if you have to) the grade they would be in according to state cut off.

[Wheres Toto]

If you are homeschooling, I don't think it matters. Teach him where he's at.

 

If you are sending him to school, I would check and see what is the norm for your local schools. See what they expect out of kindergarteners, and then decide. The more information you have, the better decision you can make.

 

Red-shirting is very common in my area but not because of sports. Except those sports actually done in the schools starting in about 7th grade, all rec and travel teams go strictly by age.

 

My son went to Early Intervention from 3 to 4 for speech delays (and quirky behavior they couldn't explain). When he was declassified at 4, they told us not to send him to kindergarten until he was 6 (late August birthday). Since they had just spent a year with him, knew the expectations of the school, and knew the areas trend (definitely red-shirting), listening to them seemed a good idea. And in all ways except academically, they were probably making a good call. But he's been working ahead of grade level since then, and if you add boredom to his other issues (that are still there at 7 1/2), school doesn't seem like a great idea. So we decided pretty quickly to homeschool. We have no plans to send him except maybe high school (which he already says he wants to stay home for) and I"m hoping by then he will be able to handle some things better, plus our local hs will allow him to test into whatever level classes are right for him.

 

Dh and I both started school as young 5 year olds. Dh had no troubles in school, played sports, was advanced in class (although he graduated almost 40 years ago, I think things were different then). I HATED school. It was absolutely miserable, especially in a social sense. I never put that down to being younger than most of the class though, I just figured I was shy, introverted, etc.

[SailorMom]

Every boy is different, obviously, but our concern wasn't academics or size - it was maturity. Both of our sons went to PS for preschool through 1st (and 2nd for my oldest) and we knew that opportunities for playing and being outside were very limited after K. Our older son, with an October b'day, did very well waiting and following the "official" cut off of September 1st. Academically, sure, he would have been fine - but I do think the 'sitting still' issues would have been there.

Now - if we had homeschooled from the start - we probably would have had him start a year early.

However, another reason we are glad we didn't do that is his age. He will be 18 October of his senior year and have another 8 months at home before college. I'm glad he isn't going away at 17 and not turning 18 until Fall of his Freshman year.

No matter how smart he is, maturity only happens so fast.

[vonfirmath]

I'm looking ahead. In 2014, ds will barely make the K cutoff in our state (8 days). As of right now, he's big for his age, extremely verbal, and will definitely be ready academically to handle a gentle K year when he's 5. I really don't want to hold him back because I don't want a grown man someday who's still in high school. But then I don't want him to be at a disadvantage all the way through either.

 

So, is there anyone out there with a son who has done well despite being on the young side for his grade? We're talking August b-day here.

 

I sure hope so. My August b-day boy started K this year. He struggled a little the first semester (behavior wise only) but is doing MUCH better since Christmas.

[Dahliarw]

The summer birthdays of 2 of my 3 children were a partial factor into deciding to homeschool. It just makes it easier to not have to stress whether to put them in K or not. As it turns out, my middle child who is techinically a K this year (he's in a private Montessori school for Kindergarten right now and I'll hs next year - but the K part was a continuation of the other 2 years, same classroom, same teachers), would probably have been fine. My dd will turn 4 this summer, and I know a year from then she'd probably be ready too. But fortunately I can just work at their level at home. Our state requires you to file by the child's 8 birthday, which is 2nd grade here, so that's what I will file as.

 

Interestingly enough, another force that pushed me towards hsing was that my oldest, a January birthday, so smack in the middle of the school year since the cutoff was 8/31, was bored in PS K. He probably could have gone to K at 4 and been fine, but that's not allowed here. So the whole cut off and birthday thing can go either way in terms of academic ability. Fortunately with homeschooling, it doesn't realy matter what "grade" they are in. A 2nd grader can be doing 1st grade LAs and 5th grade math if that is where their ability levels are!