Maus Posted March 1, 2012 Share Posted March 1, 2012 I see these two books (Highly Sensitive Child and Living With Intensity) recommended all the time. My library has neither, so if I want to read them, I'm going to have to buy them. For those who have read them, how much "how to" is in these? I already know my son is sensitive/intense and have known for some time. I don't need another book that empathizes with me, or gives me another name to call it. I really need a book that tells me how to keep him from bursting into tears when his friends tease him, and how to help him not have nightmares, etc. Would either of those books do that? If you've read both, which is better? Thanks. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
musicianmom Posted March 2, 2012 Share Posted March 2, 2012 :bigear: I'm in the same boat. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cindyg Posted March 2, 2012 Share Posted March 2, 2012 Don't forget about interlibrary loans. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maus Posted March 2, 2012 Author Share Posted March 2, 2012 Don't forget about interlibrary loans.Thanks for reminding me of that option. I've never used ILL at my own library, because they charge ($2-5 for shipping, plus any insurance required by the lending library). The library at which we have reciprocal privileges doesn't charge, though, so I might be able to use their ILL. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jar7709 Posted March 2, 2012 Share Posted March 2, 2012 I am not much help because I have not read either of those, but the approaches and some of the coping skills in Emotional Intensity (combined with the switch to homeschool from PS) changed our home life, so I always put that one out there. ymmv, of course. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
serendipitous journey Posted March 2, 2012 Share Posted March 2, 2012 (edited) I see these two books (Highly Sensitive Child and Living With Intensity) recommended all the time. My library has neither, so if I want to read them, I'm going to have to buy them. For those who have read them, how much "how to" is in these? Well, since you asked ... ;) Hands-down, Highly Sensitive Child; particularly for littles the ages of yours. I found this book when Button (now 6) was a tot, and he would get very very upset if he bumped into people when we were out and about, but not if he bumped into plants or pillars or other inanimate objects; and he couldn't stand to have stuff on his hands, but didn't have other sensory issues; &c. It was enormously helpful to me in understanding what was going on with him; in developing strategies to support him and to manage his behavior; and in getting a sense of the varieties of sensitive out there, getting a grasp of what he was and what he wasn't (ie, sensitive, non-thrill seeking). I also thought the Highly Sensitive Person book was good to read, though I got both from my library and didn't buy them; it was mostly helpful b/c it became clear that DH & I are both "highly sensitive". RE your particular question of "how to", I don't recall how much explicit "how to" there was, but I found the book sufficient to let me quickly begin using successful strategies. Living with Intensity yielded nothing practical to me. It is clear others have found it really helpful, but I do not recall finding any really useful advice: I hope that folks who really liked it will post and describe their experiences. It also annoyed me by suggesting (very strongly, to my reading) that people who are highly sensitive have a greater range of spiritual-growth options open to them, or even that they can move further on the spiritual development plane. I was bugged by descriptions of people who, to my view, spent their days navel-gazing and were characterized as extremely spiritually advanced due to their sensitivity and awareness. My goals for Button are more focused on helping him manage the negative effects of his sensitivity, optimize the positive effects, and to be humble (as in, not focused on himself and his sensitivities) and effective in his life. -- this book annoyed me so much that I'm sure it has strong value for many people (as in, many of my friends absolutely detest books I love, so I am sure it goes the other way too). However, not so much for you right now. You can look online for info. about the positive disintegration theory if you want to; Highly Sensitive Child will be immediately useful. This is the Highly Sensitive website, in case you haven't come across it before ... good luck! ETA: there's a negative review of Living with Intensity on Amazon that captures some of my perspective. I imagine the positive reviews represent the other side! Edited March 2, 2012 by serendipitous journey Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maus Posted March 2, 2012 Author Share Posted March 2, 2012 Well, since you asked ... ;) Hands-down, Highly Sensitive Child; particularly for littles the ages of yours. I found this book when Button (now 6) was a tot, and he would get very very upset if he bumped into people when we were out and about, but not if he bumped into plants or pillars or other inanimate objects; and he couldn't stand to have stuff on his hands, but didn't have other sensory issues; &c. It was enormously helpful to me in understanding what was going on with him; in developing strategies to support him and to manage his behavior; and in getting a sense of the varieties of sensitive out there, getting a grasp of what he was and what he wasn't (ie, sensitive, non-thrill seeking). I also thought the Highly Sensitive Person book was good to read, though I got both from my library and didn't buy them; it was mostly helpful b/c it became clear that DH & I are both "highly sensitive". RE your particular question of "how to", I don't recall how much explicit "how to" there was, but I found the book sufficient to let me quickly begin using successful strategies. Living with Intensity yielded nothing practical to me. It is clear others have found it really helpful, but I do not recall finding any really useful advice: I hope that folks who really liked it will post and describe their experiences. It also annoyed me by suggesting (very strongly, to my reading) that people who are highly sensitive have a greater range of spiritual-growth options open to them, or even that they can move further on the spiritual development plane. I was bugged by descriptions of people who, to my view, spent their days navel-gazing and were characterized as extremely spiritually advanced due to their sensitivity and awareness. My goals for Button are more focused on helping him manage the negative effects of his sensitivity, optimize the positive effects, and to be humble (as in, not focused on himself and his sensitivities) and effective in his life. -- this book annoyed me so much that I'm sure it has strong value for many people (as in, many of my friends absolutely detest books I love, so I am sure it goes the other way too). However, not so much for you right now. You can look online for info. about the positive disintegration theory if you want to; Highly Sensitive Child will be immediately useful. This is the Highly Sensitive website, in case you haven't come across it before ... good luck! ETA: there's a negative review of Living with Intensity on Amazon that captures some of my perspective. I imagine the positive reviews represent the other side! Thanks! That's very helpful! Yes, at this point I don't need the theories anymore, so Highly Sensitive Child sounds like the more useful of the two. And I hadn't seen the website, thanks for that, too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jenbrdsly Posted March 12, 2012 Share Posted March 12, 2012 Here are my own thoughts about giftedness and intensity. I'd love to hear yours too! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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