When does the "I do it" phase of the 2.5 year old finally end?

[Carpe Diem]

Is it quickly followed by the "I don't want to do it" phase or is there some pleasant time inbetween these stages?

 

Any suggestions? Does indulging the "I do it phase" create a monster?

 

Thanks.

[pmegan]

I think by the "NO!!!" phase :glare:

 

"Would you like some chocolate cake!"

"NO!!!" (while stuffing the cake in her mouth)

[Carpe Diem]

Moderators could you please move?

 

Thanks.

[Brindee]

Never? At least you won't hear it anymore when they head to college! :lol:

[SkateLeft]

Personally, I think encouraging them in the "I do it" phase builds their independence and their self-confidence. Of course, you only let them "do it" when they can do it safely.

 

I love that phase. It's one of the sweetest parts of toddlerhood. :) My 2.5yo ds has developmental delays, and I can't wait until he hits that phase. I'd love to hear him say, "I do it!"

[TracyR]

I think the " I do it " phase ends at age 7 . At least for my girls . Then we move on to the " I can't do it " stage . Sigh .

[summer]

I know it ends by around grade school when they claim they cannot do anything and want to lay around all day, sleep in, and so on. I hear a lot of "I can't"

[St. Theophan Academy]

Boy are we there!!! :) My 7yo dd's response to everything is, "but mom, that's too hard, I can't!"

[Andie]

I know it ends by around grade school when they claim they cannot do anything and want to lay around all day, sleep in, and so on. I hear a lot of "I can't"

 

It has something to do with learning to hold a pencil, I think. Once they hit that milestone, some sort of process is kicked off in the brain and they lose abilities -- they must suddenly slump on the table for support when previously they could sit upright, their voices become higher and trembly, they are forced to inhale deeper and exhale loudly (an untrained observer would call it sighing, probably), they become unable to grip the pencil (sad, so soon after mastering the skill to begin with!), and of course there's the (apparently involuntary) moooaaaaannning. :tongue_smilie:

[dalynnrmc]

Is it quickly followed by the "I don't want to do it" phase or is there some pleasant time inbetween these stages?

 

Any suggestions? Does indulging the "I do it phase" create a monster?

 

Thanks.

 

I have a 30yo husband and a 45yo father (oh wait, his birthday was in April so he's 46 now!) who still refuse to read the directions until a female picks it up off of the ground to fix it after he's had his hissy fit about parts missing or not being the right size or not having the proper tools.... :glare:

[Lizzie in Ma]

Hang in there. :grouphug:

[PiCO]

Is it quickly followed by the "I don't want to do it" phase or is there some pleasant time inbetween these stages?

 

Any suggestions? Does indulging the "I do it phase" create a monster?

 

Thanks.

 

 

I guess I son't understand here- how does letting a toddler do it himself create a monster? I would hope to keep this phase going for the rest of his life.

 

I do use my judgement- obviously kids can't do everything themselves- but I definitely encourage the "I do it!" phase to continue indefinitely. ;)

[cin]

I think the problem lies in the fact that they want to do EVERYTHING, even those things which are undoubtedly impossible. And if they are NOT allowed to try, they perform the biggest hissy fit known to man. Even if letting them try would be cause for CPS to intervene. Or adds an additional HOUR to task at hand...at least 4X a day.... BTDT.

 

And I believe that the I DO THAT phase is followed by the NO phase.

[riada]

I think the " I do it " phase ends at age 7 . At least for my girls . Then we move on to the " I can't do it " stage . Sigh .

 

:iagree: This is exactly how mine have worked out. I have an "I do it", an "I can't do it", and the "I won't do it" which is somewhere in between as they test their boundaries.

 

Good luck!!!

[Carpe Diem]

Hey thanks for the replies. Yes, we generally love that wants to be independent. It does make us chuckle a great deal. For example, if I am holding his hand as we step off a curb he wants to do it himself. So, he lets go of my hand and walks back up the curb and then carefully steps off.

 

My question/comment about creating a monster stems from other times as Cin explained. Example, dc wants to always push the button on the van to make the side door shut. We generally always let him push the button because if not he get so upset. But if he pushes the button to shut the door how is he going to get into the van with the door shut? So, then we figured we would let him hit the button on our remote after he gets into his seat. I can't place him there because he has to do it himself. This takes an extra 5 or more minutes for him to climb up into his seat. Generally, I give ourselves enough time to let him do all the extra things he wants to do himself but sometimes a person needs to hurry.

 

Yesterday, I carried him out of the van as he was sleeping. His siblings had gone into the building for their lessons. He woke up and realized he was 1) being carried and 2) he did not open and shut the van door. I put him down and tried my best to playfully get him to walk the rest of the way toward the building. He screamed and cried so loudly that people commented/laughed on how they could hear him inside the building/their cars. etc.

I couldn't pick up the kid to carry him into the building. He lets his arms and body go limp and then flails around. I finally realized why he was having a melt down. I told him we can go back to the van. So, he walked back to the van. I opened the door. He pushed the button and was then very content. He put on his coat. Let me wipe his tears. Then we walked hand in hand into the building. He was a pleasant little boy the next 40 minutes during his siblings lessons.

 

He really is a very sweet boy. He is always so polite saying please and thank you. He just wants to do everything himself. Sometimes you have no idea of things he wants to do himself. Like flush the toilet after someone else has used it!

 

I guess my post was more of a humorous release of mild frustration on one particular day.

[Melissa in Australia]

after the' I do it', then the 'no', then the 'I can't do it', it seems to be followed by the 'what can I do????'

stage

 

MelissaL