Moms of kid with Aspergers-- please talk with me

[wy_kid_wrangler04]

Just found out ds6 has Aspergers. Literally just found out (an hour ago or so) he has been going through testing and such over the last few weeks.

 

 

They still said there is more- (we have not had the "official meeting yet") He just told me that when I dropped off some paperwork. He is going to come and observe us at our house during school Tuesday and we will have a meeting after that.

 

 

So now my question- what programs do you love for your Aspergers dc?

 

On top of that what we know is he has a Sensory Processing Disorder (that will be discussed at the meeting and I will know more) visual/spatial delays, low eye tracking (and they said his eyes don't work together) low tone.

 

There is more. He said that was not it but there is something he won't tell me until the meeting. It's making me nervous and wondering what on earth that could be after all this he has told me, ya know?

 

So what program do you use and love for your dc? Any "must haves?" What about books/resources for mom? I am very new to this- so any advice is greatly appreciated! Thanks

[Misty]

My 7yr old daughter with Asperger's has many of the same problems as your ds.. (eye tracking, convergence, etc..).. She is also extremely hyper, does a lot of stimming (right now that is she licks her arms constantly, spits in her hand and rubs it on the backs of her legs constantly, jumps, spins, etc.).. She also has severe ADHD and severe OCD.

 

Anyway, it is really hard to engage her, but we have had success with RightStart Math. I have tried a variety of resources for the reading, but because of her eye issues, she has trouble. She is reading, but not fast or fluently. She really needs that vision therapy, which we hope to do this summer. I also use Dianne Craft's Brain Integration Therapy manual AND she does Interactive Metronome with a psychologist. She would probably still be a non-reader if it weren't for the Interactive Metronome.

[Rod Everson]

Just found out ds6 has Aspergers. Literally just found out (an hour ago or so) he has been going through testing and such over the last few weeks.

 

So what program do you use and love for your dc? Any "must haves?" What about books/resources for mom? I am very new to this- so any advice is greatly appreciated! Thanks

 

What you said about the vision issues would indicate that vision therapy should be considered at some point, but I'm curious if you've done any reading on vitamin D3 and/or Omega-3 essential fatty acids? I'm beginning to wonder whether the sun avoidance and dietary changes over the past two decades or so aren't at least partly responsible for the increases in both Asperger's and autism we're seeing nationwide.

 

If I had a child your age diagnosed with Asperger's I'd be having his vitamin D3 level checked first, then go from there. If he was low, I'd get it up and see if anything was changing, and I'd do that before getting into vision therapy. Vitamin D3 Questions on my website goes into it a lot more.

 

Rod Everson

OnTrack Reading

[Ibbygirl]

First off, I want to give you lots of HUGS! :grouphug: :grouphug: It's so difficult when you first get a diagnosis. I have an Aspie dd as well as a profoundly Autistic ds. At your next meeting, they will probably go into treatment plans and options for you. Aspie's can really do a lot and with lots of help and support have a great shot at having a "normal" life. :) C.A.R.D. was a great resource for me because they were one the only ones I could find that actually did things for Asperger's and not just Autism. I was able also to get behavioral therapy services through ARC. I'm sure at the meeting they will discuss other options with you.

 

It's hard when you first find out. There are so many emotions to work through and so much information to process. Step by step and a breath at a time you will make it through. We'll all be here to help and hold your hand. God bless you! :grouphug:

[wy_kid_wrangler04]

Thank you all for your kind words and suggestions. I hope you don't mind many, many MANY threads to come from me. My head is spinning. (and spinning, and spinning)

 

I actually have another question-but I might also ask this in a whole new thread- how would you feel about the psychologist coming to your house to observe your dc during school? I am nervous. We are supposed to have the psychologist over Tuesday around 11am. I'm not at all nervous about my ability to teach my kids- but his view of things, ya know? My biggest fear is he finds something he doesn't like (I don't know what- It's not like we are hiding anything) and try to fight us homeschooling- I am sure nothing like that will happen (I sure hope anyways) but I am absolutely scared to death of the possibility

Edited March 20, 2011 by wy_kid_wrangler04

[Ibbygirl]

Thank you all for your kind words and suggestions. I hope you don't mind many, many MANY threads to come from me. My head is spinning. (and spinning, and spinning)

 

I actually have another question-but I might also ask this in a whole new thread- how would you feel about the psychologist coming to your house to observe your dc during school? I am nervous. We are supposed to have the psychologist over Tuesday around 11am. I'm not at all nervous about my ability to teach my kids- but his view of things, ya know? My biggest fear is he finds something he doesn't like (I don't know what- It's not like we are hiding anything) and try to fight us homeschooling- I am sure nothing like that will happen (I sure hope anyways) but I am absolutely scared to death of the possibility

 

I've had psychologists come observe my son and my dd. It was nothing to worry about. Mainly they just want to see how they function in a familiar environment where they feel safe so they can get a more accurate idea of the scope of their disability. I had one come over while I was homeschooling my dd and they just basically wanted to see how she behaved in our interactions. The people I've dealt with were all very pro-homeschooling and agreed that it's great for special kids because they benefit so much from one on one attention. :) I'm sure they're just wanting to observe to help them form a behavior/treatment plan for your son. :grouphug:

[SweetMissMagnolia]

I know I was reeling for days--maybe weeks after my son was diagnosed earlier this year...he has adhd too-sometimes can be quite severe--I struggled with whether or not to use meds for a LONG time before we decided to try them--the first we used (vyvanse) gave him chest pains (scared us to death!)--we tried strattera and it works when he'll take it-but he's gotten the idea that he'll choke when he swallows it so has absolutely refused to take it anymore--so he's been off meds for over a month now and it's starting to wear on me-we were asked NOT to come back to music class because of his short attention-disrupting the class as the teacher says---as far as what lessons he's studying because of asperger's I'd say none-it might take us longer to do lessons and we might do things a different way but we're learning regular things any 2nd grader would learn--probably some advanced things they aren't learning yet..... the more I read on the issues I think that he has other things too and I'm going to bring them up with our specialist in a few weeks at our next appt (sensory issues)....hang in there....believe me we know where you're coming from....

[EmilyinND]

:grouphug: to you. I, too, just received this dx for my son in Feb. He is 12. All this time we just thought he had ADHD & was a little "quirky" Guess not. He's been on the Daytrana patch for ADHD and that works well for him. He also has anxiety, SPD and OCD tendencies. We just started seeing a new child psychiatrist (that's why he was finally diagnosed) who will be starting biofeedback & neurofeedback this week. Not sure what to expect from that but hoping for the best! She also suggested Omega 3 to help mood. Good luck to you! It's hard to hear this dx at first. I've been doing nothing but research since!

[JennW in SoCal]

Just to reassure you and the others posting here. Homeschooling an aspie is quite doable -- I've graduated mine and lived to tell the tale!

 

Except for math, I didn't use pre-packaged curricula or textbooks. Instead I read aloud for years and years and followed the WTM and Susan Wise Bauer's writing recommendations of copywork and narrations. We played vocabulary and geography games, played Mad Libs, diagrammed silly sentences. I owned some grammar programs but I most often used them as a reference guide, or would pick work sheets for specific issues.

 

My ds learned to type when he was 7. We did most work orally until he was 9 or 10, and I didn't get serious about him doing narrations until he was 12 -- yes 12. We had discussed so many books and current events over the years that I knew he could formulate his thoughts clearly -- I just waited for his writing skills to catch up. He was writing essays by the time he was 14.

 

He enjoyed logic puzzles, Mind Benders, the Countdown and Orbiting with logic series, Fallacy Detective and Thinking Toolbox.

 

Math was his weak point. He did most of his work through algebra on a white board, sprawled next to me on the living room floor. (The dog had to be closed off in another room as my ds was also very ADHD!) Sometimes my ds would bounce on a HOP 55 ball while doing math, or he sat on a stability ball at a table, but mostly we were on the floor. I let him use calculators as his working memory is so poor, but of course they aren't allowed in most testing situations. (We avoided the SAT and ACT.)

 

The most important thing that worked for him was to incorporate his interests into schooling as much as possible. Books, science, even math would center around whatever topic captured his interest. Even in high school I designed history and literature around his interests (theater, lighting design and Disney). He started volunteering with the church tech team at 13 and is now a paid staff member at church, and he is the lighting designer for several community theater productions.

 

It was a lot of work and it was very unorthodox, but he is a delightful young man, responsible and well respected, and engaged in the world around him. He has found a college program that fits his interests and learning style and will start there in the fall.

 

So take heart, be flexible about what school should look like, and hang in there!

Edited March 21, 2011 by JennW in SoCal

[MamaSheep]

Just to reassure you and the others posting here. Homeschooling an aspie is quite doable -- I've graduated mine and lived to tell the tale!

 

Except for math, I didn't use pre-packaged curricula or textbooks. Instead I read aloud for years and years and followed the WTM and Susan Wise Bauer's writing recommendations of copywork and narrations. We played vocabulary and geography games, played Mad Libs, diagrammed silly sentences. I owned some grammar programs but I most often used them as a reference guide, or would pick work sheets for specific issues.

 

My ds learned to type when he was 7. We did most work orally until he was 9 or 10, and I didn't get serious about him doing narrations until he was 12 -- yes 12. We had discussed so many books and current events over the years that I knew he could formulate his thoughts clearly -- I just waited for his writing skills to catch up. He was writing essays by the time he was 14.

 

He enjoyed logic puzzles, Mind Benders, the Countdown and Orbiting with logic series, Fallacy Detective and Thinking Toolbox.

 

Math was his weak point. He did most of his work through algebra on a white board, sprawled next to me on the living room floor. (The dog had to be closed off in another room as my ds was also very ADHD!) Sometimes my ds would bounce on a HOP 55 ball while doing math, or he sat on a stability ball at a table, but mostly we were on the floor. I let him use calculators as his working memory is so poor, but of course they aren't allowed in most testing situations. (We avoided the SAT and ACT.)

 

The most important thing that worked for him was to incorporate his interests into schooling as much as possible. Books, science, even math would center around whatever topic captured his interest. Even in high school I designed history and literature around his interests (theater, lighting design and Disney). He started volunteering with the church tech team at 13 and is now a paid staff member at church, and he is the lighting designer for several community theater productions.

 

It was a lot of work and it was very unorthodox, but he is a delightful young man, responsible and well respected, and engaged in the world around him. He has found a college program that fits his interests and learning style and will start there in the fall.

 

So take heart, be flexible about what school should look like, and hang in there!

 

Thank you for this post. I've finally gotten to where I feel like I can 'do' this whole elementary/jr. high thing with my Aspie, but next year is 9th grade and for some reason that is just really freaking me out...lol.

 

And to the OP, homeschooling has been the best thing EVER for our Aspie. The one-on-one instruction tailored to his needs has made a night and day difference for him. As far as resources we like, I'd say the WTM approach has worked best for us for history, science, and writing (narration, copywork, dictation, lists, outlining, etc.). For writing, though, we've gone more slowly and like JennW have done a lot of the narrations and things orally because the actual physical act of handwriting has been a challenge for ds. He's really doing well lately with that, though, especially when he can type rather than write by hand. For penmanship, Handwriting Without Tears has been a godsend here for both of my quirky kids. After trying on several math programs the one I like best for him is Math U See. I like All About Spelling, which I'm using with my dd, and wish we'd found it when ds was younger because I think that approach would have been really good for ds too.

 

What I'm finding more and more that what I need in a program I'm going to use with ds boils down to a few key characteristics:

 

1) It needs to be structured logically. It works best when the concept we're studying builds sequentially in some fashion from what we studied before, so that there's a 'framework' on which to hang the new knowledge. So for example, science works best for us when we focus on one field of study, like life science, or earth science, as recommended in The Well-Trained Mind, and walk through it in a systematic way, rather than jumping around randomly amongst various areas of science like many elementary science programs do. It works better for him if we study the universe, then galaxies, then stars, then the solar system, then the structure of Earth, then tectonic plates, then earthquakes and volcanoes, then oceans, then atmosphere, etc, rather than studying stars, then bean seeds, then magnets, then how baking soda and vinegar react, where there's no connection or progression of ideas. The same is true in other subjects as well. It works best to have this week's spelling rule have some relationship to last week's and be able to explain how that relates to the one from the week before. It works best to learn math concepts in a logical order instead of doing addition this week, shapes next week, time the following, and then subtraction. Structure is vital for us.

 

2) Rules are helpful. Spelling rules, math rules, the 'rules' that tell us how the physical world works, rules of grammar, and so forth. The more things are explained as rules (some of which have exceptions) that operate within that logical framework from #1, the better that program will work for us.

 

3) Flexibility. For us, there is a lot of variation from one day to another in ds's interest level, focus, ability to regulate his emotional state, recall of previously studied information, and a lot of other aspects of educational success. I call it (inside my own head, and pretty much nowhere else...heh...) the daily autism quotient. I need materials that let me make adjustments in things like the length of a lesson, the amount of writing that will be required, and so forth. I like WTM style science and history because I can pick a lesson topic for the week, like "ocean currents, waves, and tides", and then adjust what we do with that topic based on how our day or week is going. Some weeks all we do is read a little about the topic. Other weeks we read a lot more about it, write a couple of notebook pages on the subject, and then do one or more lab activities and write about that. Either way, at the end of the week I can feel like we've "covered" that topic adequately according to "our" abilities that week, and we can move on. I don't have to worry about skipping workbook pages on the 'high autism quotient' days, and I don't find myself scrambling for additional enrichment on the 'low autism quotient' days when he's hungry for more. It's flexible. This is also one of the reasons I have fallen in love with Math U See. It's easy to breeze through lessons he understands easily, and just as easy to expand lessons that are more challenging for him. Flexibility is key. Programs without that built in tend not to happen at our house because I get too frustrated to stick with them.

 

Those have really become some of my primary criteria in evaluating materials for use with my Aspie.

[chiguirre]

There is more. He said that was not it but there is something he won't tell me until the meeting. It's making me nervous and wondering what on earth that could be after all this he has told me, ya know?

 

So what program do you use and love for your dc? Any "must haves?" What about books/resources for mom? I am very new to this- so any advice is greatly appreciated! Thanks

 

My guess about the "secret" dx, based on my experience with ds2, is that he'll have a really low IQ score. It's pretty typical for ASD kids to score low on IQ tests (although it's more common for Autism or PDD-NOS than for Aspergers) and it doesn't reflect their actual capacity to learn. If that's the bombshell, I would take a deep breath and put it on the back burner for now. Once you've addressed all the other issues, you'll be better able to judge how much faith you should put in the IQ number. OTOH, a low IQ score is golden if your dc will need services as an adult, so hold on to the paper.

 

When ds was 6/7, we enjoyed Five in a Row. I think this program was the key to developing his receptive language (along with ABA and ST). I taught him basic reading using Calvert K, LLATL Blue and ETC. Then he read through the Pathway readers first grade books. We started with R&S Math and that went well until the beginning of 2nd grade when he just jumbled up all of his math facts, so we started over with MUS. That helped but he still doesn't know his +/- facts well enough so we're trying Semple Math which used mneumonics and visualization to remediate common problems in math learning. So far, so good, but we're only starting addition in the teens. Ds enjoys audiobooks and documentaries and has a very good memory, so he's got a good grounding in history and science painlessly. We've also gone through SL K, 1 and 2 loosely and I plan to use SL 3 next year with both hsers. For hwing, I used HWT for printing and switch to Getty Dubay Italics when ds said he wanted to learn connected writing. It's slow going, but he's able to do more copywork this year. I hope this gives you some ideas.

[wy_kid_wrangler04]

Wow-- thank you so much!!! So many helpful posts. I very VERY much appreciate all of you for this! We had out visit with the psychologist yesterday- and I have to laugh. I don't know what he was expecting (he had never been to a homeschoolers home before) and dd12 said he had a look of amazement the whole time. She said his eyes even bugged out a few times :lol:

 

I hope my questions in the near future do not get redundant- I am sure there will be many. I am going to look into some of the curriculum suggested! We started MFW K in Jan and so far we are loving that. I have been looking at Rightstart math for a long time and I think I may take the plunge and do that with both boys together (my 6 year old is my ds going through the evals) so I think if I combine him and his 5 year old brother that would go well- any thoughts on that?

 

:grouphug: thank you again :001_smile:

[wy_kid_wrangler04]

We do Spelling Power with my dd's (well just my 3rd grader is still doing it- 7th grader finished) Would you recommend something different? Its spelling rule based but it will have a list of maybe 20-30 words per list then go onto a new rule- it cycles through them. Is there a program you think might work better for him or do you think this would work ok?

[Shadowwolf549]

Hey. I would love to find out some more info for you if you could PM me or post here...what tests did you have done? We have been trying to figure out what our DS Miah has. We have an official dx of PDD-NOS, and SPD, but I am leaning more towards the Aspbergers myself. So any info you could give would be great appreciated. Thanx!

 

 

 

Just found out ds6 has Aspergers. Literally just found out (an hour ago or so) he has been going through testing and such over the last few weeks.

 

 

They still said there is more- (we have not had the "official meeting yet") He just told me that when I dropped off some paperwork. He is going to come and observe us at our house during school Tuesday and we will have a meeting after that.

 

 

So now my question- what programs do you love for your Aspergers dc?

 

On top of that what we know is he has a Sensory Processing Disorder (that will be discussed at the meeting and I will know more) visual/spatial delays, low eye tracking (and they said his eyes don't work together) low tone.

 

There is more. He said that was not it but there is something he won't tell me until the meeting. It's making me nervous and wondering what on earth that could be after all this he has told me, ya know?

 

So what program do you use and love for your dc? Any "must haves?" What about books/resources for mom? I am very new to this- so any advice is greatly appreciated! Thanks