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Nominations for the Most Creative Excuse Award are now open


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And I would like to nominate my son, with today's entry:

 

"Mom, my ears are oversensitive today and my anxiety medication seems to be working in reverse. I can't do my work because I am afraid of the sound of the pages turning." He further reinforced his fearfulness by carrying around a large plastic battle axe and huddling in corners, whimpering.

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Seriously. If only he would put that creativity into figuring out how to LEARN things, instead of how to get out of learning anything, he'd be off to university next week.

 

It made me curious what excuses other people's kids came up with. I figure we're a bunch of homeschoolers. Surely I'm not the only one whose kids can come up with something better than "the dog ate my flash drive".

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My son drilled holes in his closet walls with a drumstick. His excuse?

 

"I wanted to be able to talk to my sister through the wall at night when we're supposed to be sleeping."

 

He also wanted to take a nap this morning instead of doing schoolwork. I let him sleep because it's been a crazy week, but I woke him up at 11:15. I told him I wanted him to sleep tonight and he needed to at least do his math and writing. He rolled off the couch onto the floor and said, "I can't do it, Mom. My body's too heavy to move."

 

Amazingly, he managed to get off his duff when I put a cookie on his desk. Fascinating. ;)

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My son drilled holes in his closet walls with a drumstick. His excuse?

 

"I wanted to be able to talk to my sister through the wall at night when we're supposed to be sleeping."

 

He also wanted to take a nap this morning instead of doing schoolwork. I let him sleep because it's been a crazy week, but I woke him up at 11:15. I told him I wanted him to sleep tonight and he needed to at least do his math and writing. He rolled off the couch onto the floor and said, "I can't do it, Mom. My body's too heavy to move."

 

Amazingly, he managed to get off his duff when I put a cookie on his desk. Fascinating. ;)

 

 

ROFL!! Amazoing how that works.

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Very creative, yet I've had days when all sound would drive me crazy. Maybe not turning pages, but close.

 

To be fair, it wasn't all "made up" on his part either. I don't think. He really does have this weirdly fluctuating sense of hearing and sometimes sounds really do bother him (other times, you can scream in his ear and he honestly cannot hear you until you touch him to get his attention, at which time his hearing turns back "on" at a seemingly more or less normal level). I do think he was rather overdramatizing the whole thing today, but it is hard to tell with him sometimes. I sent him up to chill out in his room for a while, which usually gets him over whatever neurological 'thing' he's got going on, but the washer was running up there, making noise. Also, that's where he acquired the battle axe. He also had a nice mug of warm milk with honey to settle his nerves. He didn't fully recover, however, until I pointed out that he wasn't allowed to play video/computer games until all his school work was finished. I said I didn't care if he did it today or tomorrow, but it had to be done by school time Monday morning, and no gaming until it was all finished. Then he got out his iPod, strapped on his headphones, cranked the bagpipe music up full blast, and got his whole morning's worth of work done in about a half hour.

 

Some days I think there was a mix-up at the hospital and some poor alien family from another planet that was vacationing on Earth that weekend is out there, somewhere, at their wits' end wondering how their child could possibly be so dysfunctionally LOGICAL.

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To be fair, it wasn't all "made up" on his part either. I don't think. He really does have this weirdly fluctuating sense of hearing and sometimes sounds really do bother him (other times, you can scream in his ear and he honestly cannot hear you until you touch him to get his attention, at which time his hearing turns back "on" at a seemingly more or less normal level). I do think he was rather overdramatizing the whole thing today, but it is hard to tell with him sometimes. I sent him up to chill out in his room for a while, which usually gets him over whatever neurological 'thing' he's got going on, but the washer was running up there, making noise. Also, that's where he acquired the battle axe. He also had a nice mug of warm milk with honey to settle his nerves. He didn't fully recover, however, until I pointed out that he wasn't allowed to play video/computer games until all his school work was finished. I said I didn't care if he did it today or tomorrow, but it had to be done by school time Monday morning, and no gaming until it was all finished. Then he got out his iPod, strapped on his headphones, cranked the bagpipe music up full blast, and got his whole morning's worth of work done in about a half hour.

 

Some days I think there was a mix-up at the hospital and some poor alien family from another planet that was vacationing on Earth that weekend is out there, somewhere, at their wits' end wondering how their child could possibly be so dysfunctionally LOGICAL.

 

He sounds wonderful. I had a similar conversation with my ds13 today, sans battle ax though.

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K has been complaining for a couple of days, "My legs are too long - they just don't fit right." How that impedes her doing math, I just don't know....

 

"I am taking personal responsibility! I admit I slept through my alarm and missed the bus!"

 

Well, my DD is only 5...

 

Her excuse this week: Mommy, I can't do Math today, my brain fell out of my head and so I cannot think. Sorry 'bout that!

 

Said during a time out' date=' "I can't stand in this corner, it's too small for my face."[/quote']

:lol::lol::lol::lol:

 

THANK YOU! I needed the giggles today. Your kids are wonderful!

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He sounds wonderful. I had a similar conversation with my ds13 today, sans battle ax though.

 

He is a great kid. Life with him is always an adventure, and never--EVER--dull. I would not trade him in for a dozen "normal" kids. Today was just one of those days where reality was a little more askew than it usually is around here at a time when I was feeling tired and hormonal and didn't want to have to deal with it, and I decided if I didn't find a way to laugh about it I was going to burst into tears and gnaw my own leg off trying to flee the scene.

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:lol::lol::lol: Too funny!

 

The other day my dd regurgitated portions of what she must have overheard me saying to another hs mom:

"sometimes mommy, I wish homeschooling was more about snuggling and loving and less about getting all the checkboxes checked. I feel like we're missing out on making some great memories, and I am growing up rather quickly. Someday you'll look back and think, where did my little girl go?" :glare:

Another time she pulled this one: "it's such a lovely, sunny day. If today was the last day of my life I wish I could spend it climbing a tree or chasing a butterfly in God's beautiful outdoors. But I suppose geometry will have to do." Complete the dramatization with a heavy, wistful sigh.

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Mine has done that quite a bit about things. Usually they catch the tail end and have no clue what they are talkin about. My son told me it was already 2011, I asked how that was possible when he stated well you just told Aunt Linda the year is up. I had said that at the beginning of summer.

 

:lol::lol::lol: Too funny!

 

The other day my dd regurgitated portions of what she must have overheard me saying to another hs mom:

"sometimes mommy, I wish homeschooling was more about snuggling and loving and less about getting all the checkboxes checked. I feel like we're missing out on making some great memories, and I am growing up rather quickly. Someday you'll look back and think, where did my little girl go?" :glare:

Another time she pulled this one: "it's such a lovely, sunny day. If today was the last day of my life I wish I could spend it climbing a tree or chasing a butterfly in God's beautiful outdoors. But I suppose geometry will have to do." Complete the dramatization with a heavy, wistful sigh.

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:lol::lol::lol: Too funny!

 

The other day my dd regurgitated portions of what she must have overheard me saying to another hs mom:

"sometimes mommy, I wish homeschooling was more about snuggling and loving and less about getting all the checkboxes checked. I feel like we're missing out on making some great memories, and I am growing up rather quickly. Someday you'll look back and think, where did my little girl go?" :glare:

Another time she pulled this one: "it's such a lovely, sunny day. If today was the last day of my life I wish I could spend it climbing a tree or chasing a butterfly in God's beautiful outdoors. But I suppose geometry will have to do." Complete the dramatization with a heavy, wistful sigh.

 

Wow, she lays it on thick, doesn't she?? :lol:

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HAHAHA! My youngest says "Don't you want me to look back fondly on my childhood?"

 

:lol::lol::lol: Too funny!

 

The other day my dd regurgitated portions of what she must have overheard me saying to another hs mom:

"sometimes mommy, I wish homeschooling was more about snuggling and loving and less about getting all the checkboxes checked. I feel like we're missing out on making some great memories, and I am growing up rather quickly. Someday you'll look back and think, where did my little girl go?" :glare:

Another time she pulled this one: "it's such a lovely, sunny day. If today was the last day of my life I wish I could spend it climbing a tree or chasing a butterfly in God's beautiful outdoors. But I suppose geometry will have to do." Complete the dramatization with a heavy, wistful sigh.

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