How to motivate kids?

[tarana]

In June, my twin girls(8) were very intrested in learning Cursive, grammar, spelling, math. This month they simply don't want to touch their books.

I tried giving them a break for few days, reduced their work, bribed them with outings, gave time on computer for each lesson, threatened to take away library/bookstore visits which they love. Nothing seems to be helping. They just want to laze around and complain nothing to do!

 

Any ideas how to motivate them? Or is it the heat (110 degrees +)?

[anissa]

Sounds like it is time for a little day trip somewhere fun.. My children do the same thing and a simple picnic in the park or trip to a museum does wonders.

[Faithr]

Punitive stuff rarely motivates, I have found. It just creates resentment and makes me so weary! I think a fun break and then a pep talk or two about the bigger picture (why what they are learning is important) and then a lot of enthusiastic coaching them along and making sure that they aren't spending too much time doing dull stuff. It is good to mix active/engaging things in with seatwork/passive stuff. One thing that works well for us is if I take each kid on a lunch date and we have a heart to heart over a slice of pizza or a burger.

[CathyT]

Heat could certainly be a factor. How about giving them some nice stationary and writing letters to Grammy or some other understanding adult who would write in cursive back to them? Spelling, penmanship, and sharing all rolled in one. They could even go to the post office and pick out stamps and pay for them with correct change? :)

[2squared]

Have you tried a different approach? I don't know what you use, but my kids love, love, love FIAR/homeschoolshare units, nature study, and read alouds. Once they get excited, I can easily add in the less fun tasks.

 

The other thing I do is limit their lessons. For my 6yo, 15 min of math and done. For my 8yo, 25 min of math and done. 30 min of reading and done. They will often want to stretch the time limit, but knowing there is an end when they begin helps a lot.

[tarana]

An Update: We took the girls on a vacation to Las Vegas. They had tons of fun. We came back last week & again the laziness has restarted. Yesterday I told them I would take them to the pool, in an hour the work got done.

Today I told them I am inviting over someone for the weekend, all laundry got folded & put away.

Yes the girls are bored & can't play outdoors much due to the heat. It is terrible even at 8:00 in the evening. They want a change! I miss my walkings! Have to bear this until October!!!

[LanaTron]

It is taking me a long time to learn this (my eldest is 14), but here's what works with my kids:

 

1. Consistency--I'm not saying that you are not consistent. I just know that I have to work at it, and things go better when we consistently do school, starting at around the same time every day.

 

2. Expectation--again, not saying you don't do this...when my expectation is that they do the work, they are more likely to do it, and more likely to do it willingly. I've stopped using punative measures, or cajoling, or rewarding. Schoolwork is just what we do. And I'm not a mean or strict mom or a good disciplinarian--quite the contrary, although I do find that when I use what I call my "alpha-dog" voice, they are very responsive. ;)

 

When they say, "I don't wanna," I just repeat myself, in a cheerful voice. If they say, "I don't wanna," again, I use that alpha-dog voice. If I make it clear that I'm not going to back down, and that I mean business, they will do the work. And I notice that more often than not, they end up engaged with the work once they have been doing it for a few minutes. And I also notice that they are happier when I've been clear about my expectation and they know they've met it.

 

Lastly, I'll say that I've not got all this down pat just yet. We still have plenty of days where it is a struggle to get the work done. And it all varies depending on hormones (mine and theirs :lol:), allergies, outside activities, etc., etc.

 

HTH

[LanaTron]

You can take or leave my other post...you are right that having something to look forward to where they know they have to finish their work before they can go is a huge help with this issue!

[SailorMom]

Oh lord - my sons attempt that laziness all year. Starting at age 9 it became more and more difficult. However - both of them know that they have a certain amount of work to get done, and the faster they get it done, the sooner they will have free time and time for other things. This has been the biggest motivator for them, and I don't have to bribe, cajole, etc. Now - we do have fun days - but they arenot rewards for finishing school. The fun days are prescheduled - but both of them know they will get canceled if they don't do well in their work.

That being said - we don't do school in the summer. Too much other stuff going on!

[Embassy]

If I lived in that heat I would probably feel miserable. If the onset of the problems came with the heat I suspect that cooler weather would help. I'm guessing you have AC so it is tolerable inside. If they miss outside activities maybe you can do some inside activities like dancing, jumping around on rebounders, etc.

[Ellie]

Here's the thing: If you let them do something, such as grammar, because they wanted to, you can't then think of ways to "motivate" them to do it when they change their minds.

 

OTOH, if you require them to do it because you think it's a valuable part of their education, then they have to do it whether they want to or not; you don't "motivate" them to do it.

 

You announce that beginning [insert date here] their school days will begin at this time and they will do these assignments. Complaining will result in beatings (ok, not beatings :lol: but however it is that you discipline for complaining). In the meantime, they may laze around the house, although they may NOT complain about having nothing to do, because can come up with ideas for them which will not be nearly as pleasant as the things they can invent on their own.