phone calls, noisy children, and your system...

[battlemaiden]

I live in a maybe 1000sq ft cottage (and I believe that is a very generous number) with six children. :001_huh:

 

I don't mind the closeness, it is a cute place, until I have to make a phone call.

 

My children are generally very well behaved, but noise level has always been a bit of an issue- is this just a large family-Must. Be. Heard. thing? Or what? Back to my question...

 

My problem is making phone calls. In the past, I simply left the room to make calls. Now I have no "room" to go to. I had no idea how clueless my dc were about how to behave while I'm on the phone. You would think a simple, "when mom's on the phone you all need to keep quiet and help the baby stay entertained," would work, wouldn't you? Un-uh.

 

Has anyone had remarkable success with incentives? Consequences? Threats of bodily harm?;) And if you usually just leave the room when you have an important phone call to make- count your blessings. :tongue_smilie:

 

Thanks.

 

Jo

[battlemaiden]

I live in a maybe 1000sq ft cottage (and I believe that is a very generous number) with six children. :001_huh:

 

I don't mind the closeness, it is a cute place, until I have to make a phone call.

 

My children are generally very well behaved, but noise level has always been a bit of an issue- is this just a large family-Must. Be. Heard. thing? Or what? Back to my question...

 

My problem is making phone calls. In the past, I simply left the room to make calls. Now I have no "room" to go to. I had no idea how clueless my dc were about how to behave while I'm on the phone. You would think a simple, "when mom's on the phone you all need to keep quiet and help the baby stay entertained," would work, wouldn't you? Un-uh.

 

Has anyone had remarkable success with incentives? Consequences? Threats of bodily harm?;) And if you usually just leave the room when you have an important phone call to make- count your blessings. :tongue_smilie:

 

Thanks.

 

Jo

 

I should also point out that we *DO* have three bedrooms, but this is, afterall Hawaii and the walls are literally boards...just boards...no insulation etc.

 

So shutting the door to a bedroom is not very effective.:glare:

 

Jo

[Mrs Mungo]

I don't know what the answer is but I always thought a room with a velcro-covered ceiling and velcro suits for the children would come in handy for these occasions.

[Peek a Boo]

Threats of Bodily Harm work rather well here.

ok, so i *start* w/ wonderful incentives, lol.

duct tape comes in handy too.

 

seriously, you're gonna hafta do some role-playing and teach them to be quiet for a solid 15 minutes. They should be able to learn to wait nicely. You'll have to start w/ a simple 2-minute period of silence, and work your way up.

 

I have plenty of room, but somehow w/ 5 kids they always find me and want to bug the carp outta me whether i'm hiding in a bathroom, back room, or closet. They can SMELL when i'm on the phone, lol.

 

Do they sit in a pew at church w/ you? Same kind of training/quiet thing. Make sure you have a box o' treats that are ONLY for phone time.

 

good luck!

[Closeacademy]

I don't know if this would work for you but my dh often just walks outside with the phone and takes the call on the porch or walks around the yard. But if you have a loud neighborhood it might be a problem.

[Pamela H in Texas]

I trained kids pretty extensively for things that I desperately needed (them staying out of street, being quiet when phone rang, etc). Practice makes "better." Teach them what TO do rather than just telling them to be "be quiet and don't interrupt."

 

Actually, this particular issue is raised in Raising a Thinking Child by Myrna Shure. If the kids can truly think through the situation, they will find it easier to follow through on good behavior. So if they can think, "can mom hear on the phone AND hear 6 kids carrying on?" they'll be more likely to hush. Same with interrupting. "Can mom talk to Aunt Jane AND me?"

 

But then what are they to do right then? Should they all run to play in the bedroom? Should they all sit silently under the kitchen table? Should they do the "shhhh finger" sign? And what if they need to speak to you? For my kids, I had them put their hand on my leg/hip and I would put my hand on theirs that way they know that I know they need me. Then within a min or two, I would ask the caller to give me a moment so I could help kiddo.

 

People have always been amazed how they can call my house when I have 6 kids, most of them under school age, here (fostering, daycare, etc) and it be SO incredibly quiet.

 

Another thing....don't answer the phone when things are in a frenzy. If you are dealing with 2 or 3 kids on something, that is just not the time to add something else to the mix. I'm REALLY bad about trying to do EVERYTHING, but life is so much easier if I just settle what I have going on before calling someone back.

 

Anyway, so decide what they are to do then practice.

Pamela

[dorothy]

My method involves a statement before getting on the phone. I make them all stop and look at me and then I say:

 

"I am getting on the phone. Do not talk to me or hover around me unless you have a MEDICAL EMERGENCY. If you interrupt me for anything other than a MEDICAL EMERGENCY, you will have a MEDICAL EMERGENCY!"

 

Nice, huh? Kind of works though.

[angela in ohio]

When each of my dc came fo the age to try being noisy while I was on the phone and was old enough to know better, I made a few phone calls to people I could hang up on (let the person know ahead of time.) Knowing that mom can and will hang up the phone on a second's notice and deal with them usually does the trick. :D We have absolute silence while I am on the phone. It's not that much time, so there is no reason they can't be quiet.

 

This works really well for toddler dc who think they can run wild while you are in the shower, too. You only have to interrupt your shower once and sneak out dripping wet before they realize that it is a possibility. :glare:

[Plaid Dad]

We also have a small space and a chatterbox, so this is an ongoing issue for us, particularly when my wife is on business calls.

 

I do let dd know when I'm making an important call and impress upon her the need for quiet. Whenever possible I try to move to an isolated area, including outdoors; I've even made calls in the bathroom! When I'm on the phone, I don't hesitate to ask the person I'm speaking to (with apologies) to hold on for a moment, cover the receiver with my hand, and tell said noisy child to pipe down, go outside, shut the door, turn down the music, whatever. Repeatedly, if necessary. If I'm talking to a friend or family member, they know dd and aren't bothered. If I'm talking to a business - well, it's probably not the first time they've dealt with background noise or a harried parent. My job is to minimize the noise; their job is to maintain professionalism by ignoring it.

[Old Dominion Heather]

I don't have an answer for you. My phone calls are usually interupted while I whisper fiercly "Is there BLOOD??? DO NOT TALK TO ME UNLESS THERE IS ACTUAL BLOOD OR VOMIT INVOLVED!!!"

 

sigh.

[WTMindy]

You need to work on your finger snap/evil eye combination. That is what I remember from my mom when she was on the phone. I have the weakest snap of anyone, so I just have to practice the evil eye.

 

Sorry, I have no great advice.

[tsuche]

Hi,

I have tried waiting for naptime for littles or go into my bedroom helps me.

Blessings,

Terry

[ChrisN in NY]

My dh is away alot for his work. Before we had cell phones, he had to call me when he could get to a phone. He got SO TIRED of my telling the kids to wait till I was off the phone for something or my having to stop talking to correct them because they were really getting at each other.

 

What is it with kids when the only adult around gets on the phone??

 

Anyway, he told me to fine them for each time. He said a dime; I went with a quarter. They didn't have to pay out too many quarters before they caught on.

 

Thinking it's time to do this again, at least with my youngest, but maybe we'll keep it at a dime. :D

[ThelmaLou]

This is an neverending problem for us. In the middle of important conversations (Dr. offices, etc...) my 5 boys often find me knocking loudly on the nearest piece of furniture and doing the "zip the lip" motion wildly. Or sometimes I simply point to the next room and motion them to leave the immediate area. But the phone is in the kitchen, and I'm tethered to the wall by a cord. (My husband doesn't want to use a cordless phone...he uses a cell phone all day at work and he's convinced we'll all get brain cancer if we use a cordless. I'm don't share his concern, but I'm honoring the sentiment.) I can't just walk into another room to talk. And the kitchen/living room are the center of our house. All traffic is mainly in this area. The worst is when I'm on a phone call with voice prompted commands. Every bit of background noise gets interpreted by the voice system as input. This drives me nuts.

 

Here's the worst scenario. The boys are all being loud. Actually, even just talking in normal voices is too much when there's 5 of them! Anyhow, I've stretched the phone cord across the kitchen to the sink where I'm washing dishes, cooking, etc. Someone walks through the kitchen and has to pass to the other side of the phone cord. So what do they do (despite the constant lectures not to touch the phone cord)? They lift the cord to pass through, leaving it to do the "boi-oi-oi-oi-ng motion across every bit of kitchen counter between the wall and the sink, knocking over every last item in its path. Grrrr.... I'm convinced that God intends that corded phone to be a means of sanctification in my life.