Jean in Newcastle Posted December 10, 2009 Share Posted December 10, 2009 At least it is new to me. Dh's family is not pressuring me to stop homeschooling. They are pressuring me to put ds12 into a co-op. After asking a few questions as to what they mean I realized that they mean a virtual academy run by the public school system. In one sense it doesn't bother me - I can imitate an immovable rock very easily. But in one month I've been approached now 5 times about this (by two different family members). This is getting old. I have told them that I did look at what was out there at this level and will continue took at offerings each year but decided not to do it at this time. Their reasoning is that a middle schooler needs input by someone other than mom and more interaction with other teens. In one sense I agree with them. And I will be on the look-out for some classes that provide him with discussion opportunities in the future - most likely not run by the public school system. Their other concern seems to be science labs. (They've brought up science all 5 times). Since ds12 is a couple of years ahead in science I don't know why they think that I'm so incapable of teaching him science.:glare: Do you think they have a case regarding science? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elegantlion Posted December 10, 2009 Share Posted December 10, 2009 I'm not sure if they have a case, depending on your comfort level with teaching science. My ds 12 is ahead in science as well. My plan is to continue to teach at home and then add in CC classes hopefully at the junior and senior level. I certainly wouldn't put him in traditional school just to get science labs. A homeschool co-op maybe, but not school. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TravelingChris Posted December 10, 2009 Share Posted December 10, 2009 Science and math are the things we don't outsource since we have the science equipment at home that is better than I had in high school and very comparable to what I had in college. Math I also don't need to outsource at least so far since both dh and I are good at math. I like to outsource writing because I find editing tedious. Each one of us decides what to outsource and what to do on their own. Many homeschoolers do the opposite of me and outsource the math and science. Isn't homeschooling great that we have the choices. Do look into outside classes of your own choosing. I think it is helpful to have 12 and up have some outside teaching and interaction with other students. That said, it certainly doesn't have to be a virtual school especially if that school makes you do everything with them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MomsintheGarden Posted December 10, 2009 Share Posted December 10, 2009 Their other concern seems to be science labs. (They've brought up science all 5 times). Since ds12 is a couple of years ahead in science I don't know why they think that I'm so incapable of teaching him science.:glare: Do you think they have a case regarding science? I don't really think they have a case, because most science labs can be done at home. We did, and ds is a successful engineering major at a well-known and regarded engineering school - getting As in the math and science classes he didn't AP. Dd is soon to follow in his footsteps at another school, majoring in biochemistry, with plenty of AP science/math credits. We don't outsource anything. I think whether or not you outsource should be you and your husband's business. Many families outsource math and especially science, and plenty of others do it all at home. If you think you can do it all at home, there are PLENTY of resources to help you. If you want to outsource, ditto. Perhaps it's time for both you and your husband to think of a polite, but firm response to their negative pestering. GardenMom Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harriet Vane Posted December 10, 2009 Share Posted December 10, 2009 No, I don't think they have a case. They sound insecure, and as though they are trying to drive you towards an option that they find more palatable then on-your-own-without-expert-assistance homeschooling. You are your son's teacher and his mother, and are most familiar with his needs. You have spent a LOT more time than the relatives looking at options with his needs and your abilities as a teacher in mind. Tell them to knock it off as they really don't know what they're talking about. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AuntieM Posted December 10, 2009 Share Posted December 10, 2009 Hi Jean, I agree with the others that it is not necessary to send him to school to do science experiments unless *he* is the one asking to go, in that case I'd consider a true hs co-op (not like the one your folks are pressing). I would like to ask you though, gently, whether you think their reasons are as clear as stated. Could it be that they are perhaps concerned about your health and are offering an alternative? Of course, I have no idea of your family dynamics, I just wonder if that's a factor. If not... *Be* the rock. ;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
momtoboys Posted December 10, 2009 Share Posted December 10, 2009 Weirdly, my MIL was telling me she thought it was a state requirement for me to put my 7 year old DS in a co-op. I said, "no, it's not". She thought it was horrible that I don't. I tried to tell her he's around kids all week and he goes to Gymnastics, Chess Club, church activities. . and on and on. . .but she still thinks he should be in a co-op. ETA: There aren't even any great co-ops w/ in a 10 minute driving distance of my house. . and I don't feel like driving further than that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dhudson Posted December 10, 2009 Share Posted December 10, 2009 Have you read SWB's most recent blog on Science? I think you might find it interesting and it might give you something to say back. Otherwise, I would politely, but firmly, tell them that my dh and I were making the decisions based on what was best for our children and that while we appreciate their concern we feel feel confident in what we were doing. Then end the conversation.:001_smile: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elegantlion Posted December 10, 2009 Share Posted December 10, 2009 *Be* the rock. ;) I'm so stealing this for myself. Thanks. :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
C_l_e_0..Q_c Posted December 10, 2009 Share Posted December 10, 2009 I also have a 12yo. I am finding that he needs more and more someone other than mom as a sounding board for ideas. He's ahead in math and sciences, on par for the rest. We added some long distance schooling for him, mostly in languages. However, I have contacted the local university and was told they wouldn't even look at a homeschooler's application if: 1. science labs were not done in a real lab, with real lab equipment. The kitchen labs don't count even if they're basically the same thing. 2. the homeschooler has not attended a college level class in person (no long distance school, no online classes) before applying. And this from a university that is known to be homeschooler friendly! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MomsintheGarden Posted December 10, 2009 Share Posted December 10, 2009 I also have a 12yo. I am finding that he needs more and more someone other than mom as a sounding board for ideas. He's ahead in math and sciences, on par for the rest. We added some long distance schooling for him, mostly in languages. However, I have contacted the local university and was told they wouldn't even look at a homeschooler's application if: 1. science labs were not done in a real lab, with real lab equipment. The kitchen labs don't count even if they're basically the same thing. 2. the homeschooler has not attended a college level class in person (no long distance school, no online classes) before applying. And this from a university that is known to be homeschooler friendly! Sounds like it's time to find another university! GardenMom Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted December 10, 2009 Author Share Posted December 10, 2009 I would like to ask you though, gently, whether you think their reasons are as clear as stated. Could it be that they are perhaps concerned about your health and are offering an alternative? Of course, I have no idea of your family dynamics, I just wonder if that's a factor. If not... *Be* the rock. ;) Actually it would be nice if they were concerned about my health! But they are not. I have mentioned my health problems on occasion but usually avoid talking about it since IRL all I get are suggestions for the latest treatment options. Even then you would think that family would at least remember that I have chronic problems. But at Thanksgiving I mentioned just casually that my health problems had flared up again and MIL and SIL both said, "Oh, you have health problems?" (Being chronic, my health problems are not really noticeable. I am in pain much of the time but I don't go around grimacing and crying out in pain. Dh is the only person who can walk into a room and tell with one glance that I'm in pain - he can tell that I'm walking gingerly and am concentrating on just getting through whatever it is that I'm doing.) But as to what I think their motivation is for their concern: my ILs are 1st generations immigrants. Education is very much seen as the entryway to the American dream. Of course I hold education in high regard as well but while they are pleasantly surprised that I didn't screw up the elementary years, they can't quite wrap their minds around the fact that I won't screw up middle school and esp. high school. I do think that having increased opportunities for discussions etc. is valid. And I will add that in some fashion - next year (8th) or possibly the next (9th). So far I've been able to recreate labs in our kitchen with lab equipment that I've bought from Home Science Tools. But I am a bit miffed that they don't seem to give me credit for having thought through some of this! And I've looked at these virtual labs that they are suggesting. In my opinion they are a joke. You look at a computer screen with animated lab equipment. Then you click on the test-tube that you want to add to the beaker. . . So while they want me to provide a higher educational opportunity, I feel like they are suggesting a lower educational opportunity. (Ds12 did say this in his blunt middle schooler way - it was not met with approval!) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
C_l_e_0..Q_c Posted December 10, 2009 Share Posted December 10, 2009 Sounds like it's time to find another university! GardenMom Unfortunately, most universities north of the border are like that. Not all, but quite a few. French Canadian universities will dismiss a homeschooler's application without even looking at it. English Canadian universities are a bit better (the university that gave me the no-kitchen lab was English Canadian). But they're still pretty strict. As for going further, it rises the cost too much for us. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MomsintheGarden Posted December 10, 2009 Share Posted December 10, 2009 Unfortunately, most universities north of the border are like that. Not all, but quite a few. Oooh, sorry, I didn't know that. Thanks for enlightening me. Maybe things will change over time, like they have in the US? GardenMom Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tdeveson Posted December 10, 2009 Share Posted December 10, 2009 They do not have a case. What they do have is a lot of chutzpah telling you how to homeschool. Generally, I reply to these types of gentle pressure with something like, "We're happy with the way we're doing it. We have no plans to change." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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