ciyates Posted September 16, 2009 Share Posted September 16, 2009 I am an active member of our church. Lately there are some issues that I really question as being Biblical. It is coming from our Deacons and Board of Christian Ed (which I am on). While I have fought against it most of this issues remain private. We are not to tell the congregation. I can honestly say there is sin going on with some of the members, however the minister is trying diligent to work through this and correct them. My husband feels we should stick it out to the bitter end and I want to jump ship. We are both praying and reading our Bibles but are not sure where God is leading us. I do believe it is Biblical that my husband is the head of the household and I will follow him, but the idea of stepping back into this arena makes me sick. Let me state that both us are not sure of what to do. While we have turned this over to God and am letting him guide us we do not feel (at this moment) that the Holy Spirit is telling us what to do. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hillfarm Posted September 16, 2009 Share Posted September 16, 2009 Two things. One, I would pray and wait until God not only convicts you to leave but draws you to some other specific place. Let Him pick your new church for you, not just go on human decision-making. Second, I don't think leaving a church is always a bad thing. Sometimes I have seen God cause various members of a church to become uncomfortable for some reason and motivate them to leave. He then led them to other churches that really needed someone of their talents and gifts to join! It is entirely possible that your preacher is working in God's timing and that you should "pack your tents and go". It might be a good idea to spend some time in prayer now about your gifts and taking any actions He directs to polish them up and be ready to use them. Also, given the importance of the husband/wife unit, I don't think God would ever have the two of you go different ways on something like this. Wait and pray until both of you are in accordance on this. It won't kill you to wait, nor will it kill your dh to go a bit earlier than he might wish. So both of you need to pray and talk to each other about what answers God is giving you in your prayers. Best wishes with this. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jann in TX Posted September 16, 2009 Share Posted September 16, 2009 Some major 'decisions' were made OBVIOUSLY WITHOUT prayer or thought. Several people were deeply hurt/scared (including myself). When we went to the pastor he told us(DH had to go with me to the pastor because I'm a woman) NOT to discuss it with anybody--that he admitted the mistake and told us that it 'had to be God's plan because EVERYTHING is'... this last statement got to me and DH--not in a good way. Oh--and NO appology was made! We stuck it out in that church for nearly one year--every time I walked through the doors I felt like I was being stabbed. I had to learn to put that past me in order to worship MY GOD. The whole year DH and I were praying for guidance. One day, out of the blue, we were called up by a previous church (out of town) and asked if we would pray about being apart of a church planting team in our neighboring community (we actually live inbetween two communities). DH said he IMMEDIATELY felt that God was telling us this was where we should go. We left our old church the following Sunday (quietly) and began meeting with the Missional Core of the soon-to-be church. That was in June. We had our FIRST service as a new church this past Sunday and it was AWESOME!!!! BTW we did talk with our pastor one more time before we left the church--we did not place any 'blame' --but asked him to share in our JOY and to pray for our new adventure! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FO4UR Posted September 16, 2009 Share Posted September 16, 2009 Hmm...if the main issue is the sin that the minister is striving diligently to fix...then I would give that time. I think it's reasonable to ask the pastor what the next step is if the people involved remain unrepentant. (I'd ask privately) If there are other issues and this is just the straw that broke the camels back...then idk. Reasons for leaving should be based on doctrine, generally speaking. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ciyates Posted September 16, 2009 Author Share Posted September 16, 2009 We are on a slippery slope where people are deciding what is and what is not essential for salvation. If the Deacons deem it not essential then multiple view points are going to be taught. Our pastor has no power over this because of our constitution and church structure. After time in prayer and studying we strongly feel that some of the issues the deacons have deemed non essential are in fact essential (to us the Trinity is pretty important as well as the Bible). Sitting and waiting is very difficult for us. I am trying to let the Lord lead me and not my human emotions. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Classically Minded Posted September 16, 2009 Share Posted September 16, 2009 Pray and God will lead you. The Trinity is MOST definitely essential as it is in the Bible.....how can something be deemed non essential when God counted it essential by including it in His Word? Above all, follow God's word, not man and you will be ok. I saw you are in Cincinnati, our friends actually Pastor a church there if you are interested? I'm not trying to pull you out of your church but only if you are thinking of looking to another place. I do hope all goes well and said a prayer for you! :) We are on a slippery slope where people are deciding what is and what is not essential for salvation. If the Deacons deem it not essential then multiple view points are going to be taught. Our pastor has no power over this because of our constitution and church structure. After time in prayer and studying we strongly feel that some of the issues the deacons have deemed non essential are in fact essential (to us the Trinity is pretty important as well as the Bible). Sitting and waiting is very difficult for us. I am trying to let the Lord lead me and not my human emotions. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Calm37 Posted September 17, 2009 Share Posted September 17, 2009 (edited) The Lord may be keeping you in this situation because you ARE studying and looking for answers. Be ready to use what He is teaching you when the time comes. He WILL lead you. I really rest on the truth of Proverbs 3:5 so often, especially the part about not leaning on your own understanding (which would make you want to get out NOW). It literally says He will make your path straight. I really want to be on the straight path and not the twisty, winding one. I have found the Desiring God website and the ministry of John Piper to be really helpful to me when I have questions about teaching and doctrine. He is more reformed, but there is a lot at the site and it is easy to search. Just jumped out and entered "trinity" into the search. http://www.desiringgod.org/ResourceLibrary/Articles/ByDate/2006/1442_What_is_the_doctrine_of_the_Trinity/ Edited September 17, 2009 by cam1706 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mommyof4ks Posted September 17, 2009 Share Posted September 17, 2009 I don't know how to explain it, but you will know when it is time to leave. We had to leave a church years ago, and God was pulling us away for a while before we listened. Unfortunately it took the proverbial 2X4 upside the head to get us to go. Don't let it get to that point, it was not pretty. Pray about it and look for the answer. We were led to our current church. We never would have picked a big church, ever, but God wants us here so this is where we are. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dirtroad Posted September 17, 2009 Share Posted September 17, 2009 If the Pastor is aware & is working on the problem, perhaps praying for him & give time for results. Also, if no heresy is being preached and most of the church is faithful... it may help to focus here as you allow time for Pastor to tackle the issues. Pray for the Pastor and for the sinner... I hope you find peace in this decision soon. It can be so discouraging & takes our eyes off Christ. We all have sin and get caught up in our hypocrisy. It is hard to turn away or admit you were in it. It may be these things you have witnessed are such issues.... be prayerful the leadership is handling it and it will be "rooted out". If you begin to see they are not working on it, it is growing, or they are joining in the problem... or heresy is spreading in the church.... then it may be time to sit down with DH and approach the subject again. I agree with others, I think you will see it clearly & will know. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Slartibartfast Posted September 17, 2009 Share Posted September 17, 2009 :grouphug: I hope you find some solace and direction. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
i.love.lucy Posted September 17, 2009 Share Posted September 17, 2009 We're in the midst of this ourselves although our issues at current church are not as serious. For us, those kinds of doctrinal issues are a deal-breaker. I was just listening to an AWESOME sermon today from John MacArthur about being keenly aware of false teaching and getting away from it as fast as you can. For us acting like the Trinity is an "optional" belief is not acceptable. I agree to pray for your minister and those involved, and allow the leadership some time to resolve it. But ultimately you have a good head on your shoulders and God has equipped you and your husband with scripture to guide you. Most of all use your powers of discernment!!! Good luck to you. This can be a difficult and heartwrenching road!:grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paintedlady Posted September 17, 2009 Share Posted September 17, 2009 For me it was when I'd lost all hope of ever reconciling myself to the positions the leadership had taken. I could no longer submit to their authority b/c I no longer trusted them. When the trust was totally gone, so was I. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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