Hello, I just wanted to say how great it is to have this "For Sale" Board available on this forum. I had a ton of books to sell this year, and they're almost all gone! Not to mention that I buy about 75% of our curriculum used, so I feel like I'm helping someone else out as well. And I love the fact that we're recycling stuff rather than throwing it in the trash or just having it sit on the shelf, letting it go to waste. (Maybe I'm a little over emotional about this...it's my "special" time.) Also, a question...what do you all do with books that are partly completed? Say, between 1/4 to 1/2 finished? I have several workbooks around here in that condition, and I hate to just toss them because a majority of the book is still usable. But, on the other hand, who wants a book that's already been worked in? Any advice?

I went to this workshop many, many years ago on decluttering. I don't remember the nitty-gritty, but the one thing that has always stuck with me is that holding on to our old stuff that we don't use anymore is just another form of selfishness. Someone else could use it and does need it, but it's just taking up space in your house "just in case." (Although, 9 times out of ten, "just in case" never happens.) I'm NOT calling YOU selfish-- it's obvious you have a very generous heart with all the donations you've made in the past. I just know when I struggle with giving things away that I think I might need (like baby clothes, toys, etc..), I remember what I learned in that workshop. It's that little push I need to put it in the Donations box. And, you know what....99% of the time I don't even miss any of the stuff I give away. The problem is, when the thing is right in front of you and you have to make the decision--that's when all the memories flood back. Keep the memories, but give away the stuff! I know you can do this! Good luck!

I think we had the same movers! Some people thinks this is crazy, but the last few moves (all on the East Coast) I've packed up my kitchen myself and moved that stuff in a u-haul trailer. I can unpack it faster at the other end, and since it's with me the whole time I don't feel like I need to use a small forest's worth of packing paper to pack up the plastic kids' cups. I also feel like I'm more settled once my kitchen is unpacked and set up, and this helps me get to that point faster. I also get colored stickers and give every room a color. The night of the pack-up (after everything is in boxes, but before it gets loaded in the bigh truck) I put the stickers on the boxes in each room. Then, at the new place I can say, "Blue stickers go to the boys room, red goes to girls, etc...) I know the boxers are supposed to label the boxes, but I've learned that they sometimes take some creative liberties in their labeling practices. I tend to declutter on the back end of the move as I'm unpacking. I'm going to have to unpack all the boxes anyway, so why go through all the stuff twice? That way I have the boxes on hand already, and I don't have to part with something just because it might not fit. I'll know right then and there if it fits or not. If you're staying in CONUS, getting a u-haul trailer is another suggestion. Marine lingo is "partial DITY move." You get your trailer (or you might even be able to use an SUV), and load up everything that you don't want them to take, or that they aren't allowed to take. The gov't will pay you a percentage (I can't remember exactly how much, but I think 90% sounds right) of what it would cost them to move that stuff with professional movers--all for moving stuff you'd have to move yourself anyway. The important thing is to keep all your receipts, and have the trailer officially weighed both when it's completely full and completely empty. Each time we've done this, we've made more than $1000 (sometimes way more) even after paying for the trailer and having the trailer pull installed on our van. It's all completely legit--you can find out about it at the place you go to when you set up the move (we call it TMO--it might be something different for you.)

When we started, my son had just come off of a horrible second grade year at a Catholic (!) school. Dh & I both grew up going to Catholic school, and I was confident that as long as we could find a Catholic school wherever we lived, the kids would be fine. I would definitely NOT homeschool. Well, I was quite dissillusioned, especially when he'd come home, bullied, or saying things to his sister like, "You smell like a used bloody tampon!" The final straw was his last day of school, and he came home with his math book and only 1/3 of it had been completed. That year, we were scheduled to PCS again in November, so dh and I decided we'd HS in the fall, and if it was horrible then we'd put them back in school when we got to SC. Only it wasn't horrible--we mostly thought it was great. It did take some getting used to, but eventually having everyone home turned into the new "normal." The way I look at it, I knew when Dh and I were married the kind of life we'd lead. (Well, sort of!) The kids had no choice in this. Homeschooling keeps their academic growth consistent, and minimizes the trauma of moving every few years, since one thing they don't have to worry about it being the new kid, again.

I'm sorry if you were feeling defensive--that wasn't my intent. I really was just asking an honest question and explaining my interpretation of what I had read. We probably run in different religious circles (I'm Catholic) and I was just trying to get a deeper understanding of another's faith since you are obviously pretty knowledgeable in yours. I do agree with what you are saying. We should lead by example. Attacking people is never a good way to lead them to God. I get that. I'm certainly not one who says, "Well, if you can't beat them, join them!" and then start "wallowing" in all sorts of sin. I don't think non-religious people should dress to accomodate religious people. I do think they should be made aware of the fact the provocative clothes they are wearing could be considered offensive. If they keep it up, well....that's their decision. I can't stop them. But why can't I say that I don't like it? Gee whiz...Christians are always being forced to stop doing things because our crosses, 10 Commandments, etc...might be "offensive" to others of different faiths. Maybe a little less finger shaking next time. It keeps people from asking honest questions if they feel they're going to get lectured.

Thanks for trying to clear that up, but I'm still a little confused. Are you saying we need to turn all the wolves into sheep first, and then the modesty thing will resolve itself on its own? Or, are you saying there are always going to be wolves out there, so we need to just work really hard (i.e. by not looking at provocative dressers) so that we don't go astray. If it's the second, then it does sound so...I don't know....like "we're better than they are, and we're going to heaven, so let's not even mess with them." I do agree that there are a lot of wolves out there, and following the right course (and teaching our children to do the same) gets harder and harder all the time with so many negative influences around. I'm not trying to be dense (although I do feel a little dense at the moment!)

I have a question about this, and it's something I've read a few times around here that I've never understood about certain groups of Christians. What difference does it make if the cleavage-shower is non-Christian? To me, it sounds like "Oh, who cares what she does...she's going to Hell anyway." Am I understanding this right? I can see how a Christian woman shouldn't or wouldn't want to dress in a provocative way because it goes against her religious beliefs. But, we still have to LOOK at the provocative dresser, no matter what her religious beliefs are. I think that's the issue here, and what the OP intended a million pages ago.

:iagree: I have the same disease...I envy those people who can pick one thing and stay with it. That's what I call discipline. ;) And you're right....using what you've got, and using it well is probably the secret to success.

Ok, I'm going to probably ruffle some feathers here and say that this thread has a tone of....oh.....superiority or even snobbery. The Well Trained Mind Curriculum (or Classical Education) isn't necessarily the best method out there for everyone. It's a challenging curriculum, for both teacher and student. Maybe a mom with a large family (or even a mom with a not so large family but many obligations) can't commit to the classical method. Should she ditch homeschooling alltogether because she can't do classical? Are the only two options classical or public school? Textbooks may be a better option for her while allowing her to keep homeschooling. She may never even consider WTM or the classical method because textbooks allow her to successfully get the job done. I've also read somewhere (I don't remember where) that homeschoolers consistently outscore public and private schooled kids, no matter what curriculum they use. So I don't think the classical method is necessarily the best, but it's one of several options available. We have the luxury of choosing the option that works best for us. I think sometimes we (myself included) get so caught up in a certain curriculum or trend that we start to believe that EVERYBODY should be doing it, and if they don't do it they're lazy, undisciplined, etc... If I've learned anything from this board, it's that there are a whole bunch of different kinds of people out there, and I'd better be real careful if I say that everybody should be doing a certain something. Finally, I think we in our homeschooling world sometimes forget there's a whole other world of non-homeschoolers. I'm not surprised that a non-homeschooler hasn't read (or is even aware of) the Well-Trained Mind, even if their kids go to a school that teaches in the classical method. (But, I would hope that they know that the classical method is.) That's all....I'm off before the tomatoes start flying.....:auto:

I agree, (with this and your whole post) and I think the same can be said for immodesty as well.

Of course I've read them! This thread is like a car accident--as much as I try not to look, I just can't help myself! ;) To me, it just didn't sound like the poster who brought up the 72 hour rule necessarily had a problem with it. (is that what you're referring to? I'm getting lost here!) I don't know...it just didn't seem like she was looking at her watch all the time and saying, "Oh geez....hour 68. Only 4 more hours left before is HAVE to do it...AGAIN." It sounded like this "routine" worked well for her & her husband, and she was having a fine time. Her modesty doesn't seem to be giving her any trouble.

(bold print added) So, not to open ANOTHER can of worms, and I'm not being snarky--it's just an honest question: Are you saying if a man is regularly "satisfied" (every 72 hours, or whatever) then the cleavage/cracks/etc...that are commonly seen these days will be of no temptation to him since his needs are being met? And, another question--why does dressing modestly make a person sexually repressed? I don't understand the connection.

Honestly, I would freak out. Does he NEED to go on this deployment. In other words, has he been home too long?; is he up for promotion and all the other guys in his field have been gone way more than he has?; is there a reason he needs to "stand out?" A year is a really long time. I know you know that, but sometimes a deployment sounds like a good idea (or at least not so bad) when it's 6 months away, but when you're right in the middle of it you'll probably think differently. Every family is different. I can totally understand your husband's need to be where the action is. They're all like that and they all feel that responsibility, which is probably one reason we love them. But I also think our guys are gone enough and they do have a responsibility to their families as well. Even when they are home, sometimes it feels like they're gone, if that makes any sense. I would be hurt if he volunteered for more time away. I'm really sorry if this opens a can of worms for you, and I don't mean to hurt your feelings. This is totally from my perspective and how I would feel if dh asked that of me. I am sure you guys will decide what's best for your family. :grouphug:

We have one. I like it because you can pile a bunch of people on there. It seems a little less stuffy than a couch/love seat combo. We have it in our family room. I wouldn't put one in a formal living room. BUT, it's kind of a commitment. Most of them have one side longer than the other, so it can only be in a certain position in a room. If a move is anywhere in your future, or you like to rearrange your furniture periodically, you may consider getting one in which both sides are even. (more like a square corner, than a rectangle. Does that make sense?)

Oops!

Then maybe we'd all stop looking at the cleavage! No one would be offended, tempted, etc.... ;) This makes as much sense as some of the other posts I've seen on here. I think sometimes we (myself included) get so caught up in defending our case that common sense goes right out the window!

I hope I'm not showing my ignorance, and my mind is probably in the gutter, but what's the "all important 72-hour rule?" Are you supposed to have "tea" every 72 hours? :ohmy:

I started homeschooling while dh was stationed at Newport a couple of years ago. It's always on the "most difficult states to homeschool" lists, but I didn't find it so complicated. We had to send in a letter of intent to the town school board, then (I think ) keep lesson plans, 180 days attendence. There might be a few other things I"m not remembering now. Do you know where you'll be living? (Newport, Middletown, or Portsmouth) There is a wonderful homeschool group that we belonged to for the short time we were there. It's called Rhode Island Guild of Home Teachers (RIGHT) Here's the link: http://www.rihomeschool.com/ You'll get a ton of information on there and the contact people if you need more. It's a Christian group, but very inclusive. No statement of faith requirements or anything like that. (I don't even remember the topic of religion even coming up, unless we were talking about Sonlight or other curriculum.) Feel free to PM me if you need more info. HTH.

Marine dress blues....yummy.

I've started a few controversial threads in my short time here. (relatively speaking.) I had no idea they would get as controversial and snarky as they got. Again, this is probably due to my inexperience here and I had no idea my little post would start such a firestorm. I've started a couple of threads because IRL I'm fed up with something I've seen or heard. I have (wrongly?) used the forum as a sounding board, almost as an attempt to ask, "Am I the only one who feels like this? Is there anyone out there like me?" At which point, the controversy starts with a few (or sometimes many) others who try to convince me that 1)yes, I am the only one and 2)I'm wrong for my opinions. In my limited experience, I've learned the start of the thread has a lot to do with it. Start off with a question without giving your true opinion (How do you guys feel about_____________?) and the thread has a better chance of becoming a true debate rather than a mean-spirited catfight. Start off with something like, "I can't stand the way people do this________________" and you're in for a wild ride. This is probably obvious to most people, but it took me a while to figure it out. I've also learned that even if you have a question or issue that seems benign, someone out there will not agree with you, almost like this: "The sky is blue." "No it's not." "Yes it is." Then it starts to go downhill like this: "Only narrow minded people would think that the sky is blue. We free thinkers are a lot more accepting of things." "Why do you call me narrow minded just because I have an opinion?" "You're fat and ugly." (not really....but sometimes it feels like they might as well say this!) Sound familiar? I can see why joining such a thread may take some pretty thick skin. Of which I do not have, and my feelings have been hurt in some of these threads. But, my skin is getting thicker. I could never, never deal such a catty exchange in real life. I would start to cry right in front of you. This isn't good either. Sometimes the controversial threads help me get a little tougher, so that when an uncomfortable situation comes up in real life, I'm more likely to stand up for myself rather than just cower away in the corner. I'd rather practice arguing with my "pretend" friends than actually argue with the people I have to see everyday, whether they're my friends or not. I can ignore my computer, but it's a lot harder to ignore my next-door neighbor. So, I've learned if I can give my opinion, others can give theirs as well...and I might really, really oppose it. If I start a thread, I feel it's my duty (?) to stick it out and defend my point, and if someone gets a little snarky with me I'll call them on it (and they'll certainly call me on it as well.) Finally, one of the best things about being in a controversial thread is that it gets me out of my bubble. I (and many others, probably) tend to stick around like-minded people. This is not being narrowminded--it's just the reality of life. There's a whole other world out there. Listening to the other side does help me see a bunch of different perspectives. I probably won't be persuaded to join the other side, but it does help me be a little more compassionate. I hope "the other side" maybe learns a little about my perspective as well. (sorry for my rambling post!)

I think we're on the same page with this. My opinion won't change what anyone is wearing. Besides, I'm usually several seasons behind the trends so I'm sure lots of people have plenty to say about what I'm wearing. My point was, does the purposefully "offensive wearer" (for lack of a better term) mind that other people might be commenting on their attire? For example, the woman in the white dress at the ball...I'm sure you weren't the only one who noticed that she forgot an important foundational piece. I think there's certainly a difference between "I don't like pajamas as daily wear" and no panties under a white dress. Usually it's fairly obvious when a line has been crossed because many people seem to notice. Did she mind that many were talking about her? (and possibly judging her?) If not, well...then ok. Good for her--her self-esteem must be pretty high. BUT, if she had a fit because everyone was commenting on her wardrobe...well, that's too bad. She should have worn some panties! (This always seems to happen at Balls, by the way....there's always that one spouse who seem to go a little too low or too tight or too high cut.) I also had no idea about the flesh colored bra under white shirt rule. Have I been immodest this whole time! (gasp!) ;):lol: I'm off to buy some flesh colored bras before I become the talk of the town. (see...I learn new things all the time!)

I just have a few thoughts: Luckily (or unluckily) it seems like the rules of clothing have become way relaxed in the last 50 years. It used to be that women didn't leave the house without the "proper attire." Times have changed, which is good because I would have hated having to get my corset and girdle for a quick trip for a gallon of milk. On the other hand, some have taken this "relaxed rules" idea way overboard and like to wear whatever they want. I'm not just talking about immodest dress (such as too much cleavage or bikinis at the grocery store) but also things such as bra straps under tank tops, low riders with boxers showing (or worse....low riders with cracks showing,) people wearing pajama pants as regular clothes, etc.... Just visit any Walmart and you'll quickly realize that society seems to have lost the concept of "proper attire." I'm not endorsing a return to corsets and girdles, although I do sometimes wish people would rethink their wardrobe choices. I know I sound like an old fuddy-duddy, but I just can't appreciate these new trends. I'm all for comfortable clothes, I'm not for public viewing of cracks or underwear. (They're called undergarments for a reason.) I think most people can tell the difference when a well-endowed women is flaunting it, and when she's trying to wear something modest or even flattering, but seems to have had a wardrobe malfunction. To a certain point, I think a little bit of cleavage showing is feminine. It can show that I'm a mom, but I didn't leave my womanhood at the maternity ward. I still want to look like a woman and not like I just threw a trash bag over my head and walked out the door. BUT, v-neck t-shirts with a supportive bra are one thing, snug tank tops smothering large, loose, pendulous breasts are another thing alltogether. I don't think anyone wants to see true womanhood THAT much. (although who knows...maybe someone does...I'm learning new things everyday!) Again, some people take it way overboard and just want the attention. Well, they've got it. My only problem is when people choose to wear overly-revealing clothing with the philosophy of "I like this so I'll wear it and if you have an issue with it, that's your problem." Then, when the onlookers DO make disparaging or lewd comments these same over-revealers get all bent out of shape and say "How dare you talk about me?" They can't have it both ways. They can't wear revealing clothing and expect to blend in and go unnoticed. If they truly don't mind being talked about, then more power to them. I certainly envy their self-confidence. I am NOT NOT NOT saying that a women who wears revealing clothes and then gets raped is "asking for it." That crime is never the victim's fault, no matter what they are wearing (or not wearing.) I do think that it is very hard to take a woman seriously (for her mind) if she is working so hard for everyone to notice her "other" assets. I think it's even more difficult if she's working around men. For example, my husband attends a once a month work-related meeting at which several of the women like to push the envelope when it comes to appropriate work attire. (think Naughty Secretary) Dh, jokingly, has started calling the meetings the "Monthly Jugfest." Do you really think those women are taken seriously? Do you think the men are really paying attention to what great wisdom is coming out of her mouth when her other assets are coming out of her shirt? I'm not so sure, although I do know she get's a lot of attention.

:lol: I'm glad I'm not the only one!

My little guy (ds5) has turned out to be a left hander. Not a surprise, since I'm a lefty, but I cut with my right hand, so scissors have never been a problem for me. I am realizing how tricky it can be for a new cutter to try to use scissors designed for a righty. (It's even tricky for me to use with my left hand!) Any suggestions for finding good left-handed scissors? I'm a little torn about doing this, because left handed scissors are uncommon and hard to find, and I don't want to to subject him to a life of difficult cutting. In other words, I sort of want to "convert" him to a right-handed cutter so that he doesn't have such a hard time later on. Controversial, I know. Idea? Advice?

Thanks, again, to the brave ladies who are giving us an insider's perspective. I wouldn't be surprised if you did get some PM's from other hivers with more questions.