So, you're saying he loaded the d/w?

100% :iagree:. I've never understood this one. Common sense...what's that anymore?

Janet Napolitano, appointed by our President. Google her name + tea parties + enemies of the state comments. Lots of blown out of proportion defensive language used during the free speech demonstrations. There's just so much happening right now it's overwhelming. We've come so far to even be in this position.

When the tea parties were going on, our current administration referred to them as potential "domestic terrorists" and I found that extremely alarming language in a country with free speech. I'm not personally going ANYWHERE with it. And for the record, I did not agree with the last admin. either. Sorry if you find that heated language :confused: ETA: MY screen name doesn't have any political meaning.

I think there will be those who try to retaliate and fight for their freedom, but in the end they will be proclaimed enemies of the state and incarcerated and silenced.

Can you explain to neighbor what happened? Craigslister was first, and if it falls through, it's all hers?

:lurk5: I've pondered this myself...

That is so funny! I've taken up sleepwalking the last 2 months, according to dh. Last week, he called me at work to tell me I was studying the bedroom door in my sleep and looked concerned. He told me to go back to bed, and I pointed at the door and said, "but look at all the cavities!"

Along with it, (as a conservative), I think we've thrown personal responsibility out the window, and that is wrong. Everyone should be contributing to the society, even if all they can give is time.

Yep. This is the reason I'm against UHC. Until we can rid the system of the fraud and the wasteful spending, we can't afford it, period. Our govt is comprised of a bunch of wasteful spenders. We shouldn't allow them to add another system under their control until they prove they can live within a budget and cut unnecessary spending. Just like in our own households.

Do you think she can afford the time off? If so, I'd just ask her, "will you be able to count this as a vacation so that you can help me with the kids, cooking, and picking up, because I'm really going to need it!" The help I received from MIL from the last baby was as much of a blessing to her as it was to me. She knew I appreciated it, and she made it her mission to do as much as she could to lighten my load. Prior to that, I sort of held her at arms length and it wasn't so good for either of us. If she is going to make this a work retreat, I'd probably ask her to come after your family has settled in. It's just too much with a newborn to have someone else present who really isn't helping.

Well I was one of the ones who recommended going with the intention of being gracious unless this family is blatantly hostile and your dc would see that or witness an argument. Dh and I went 18 mo. without contact with my in-laws because I was tired of their ways. They live out of state, so when they'd come to visit they'd make snide remarks or facial expressions and I'd white knuckle it for the week. After they left, DH and I would have it out. I had to force him to say anything to his parents, and their response was smirky. Finally, one day I forced him to draw the line in the sand and tell them we'll speak to them when they can be respectful. It wasn't really good for our marriage that I forced him to do something he didn't want to do, but we have fortunately worked that out. 18 months later, they called, and said they were willing to hear what we had to say. They visited again. They were still very much set in their old ways without even realizing what they were doing, but I just called them out on it when it happened. It's been 2 years and I always have to say something every time they visit. But, no more white-knuckling, and it has made all the difference. Our relationship isn't perfect, but it's so much better, and they know I'll say something when they disrespect our marriage or family or my dc. They visit less, for sure. But, unlike your IL's, they do care about their grandchildren, so there is something in it for them to behave. So, in hindsight, if DH is not on the same page as me, I'd go with an openness towards reconciliation if it's been a while since you've had contact - and the moment the line was crossed - we'd agree to say, "we'll be going now," and that X treatment is unacceptable. No scene, just walk out. If there's yelling, we'd walk faster. However, if you had plans in the first place, I'd probably skip it altogether and wait for the next get together. And if she cries over the phone, "mom, gotta go, bye."

This is how I respond to dh's family even though they have created for me much trouble and heartache. It has been so much easier than trying to make a point. Just try to enjoy the BBQ with your kids and let the toxic behaviors be like white noise. You don't have to respond to them or let it affect your life or your marriage. You are in the driver's seat since you are the one married to dh. ETA: I would limit contact due to the behaviors, but if dh wants to go...that's a toughie. If they are overtly hostile, then I wouldn't go at all for dc's sake. My dh's family's just manipulative and it doesn't affect my dc.

This made me chuckle :D My thanks to Momsinthegarden for her advice. I now have one of those books on hold. Dh is in the process of building my beds in 115 degree weather, God bless his soul!

It's so interesting all the different perspectives. I have never been impressed by his speaking ability. All the ummmmmmms are distracting. I search for substance in his words but IMO he rarely says anything meaningful. He repeats himself a lot, too. The only reason I didn't like him answering the question was because he took away valuable time from the health care reform issue. I was quite perturbed at that reporter for changing the subject. The only President who has ever really knocked my socks off was Ronald Reagan. He was a man of great substance in my book.

Medical savings accounts would come as close to the modern-day version of what you are describing. Those were pre-insurance days and you paid for services rendered just as you pay for a hair cut/color or car repair or pest control or housekeeper. And it made sense.

Yes, as a health care provider, this is what I see on a daily basis, and I've had it up to "here."

You make my point. No, we don't leave these people to their own defenses when the chips are down - as I stated, I believe there should be a safety net so that NOBODY loses everything to cancer or the like. This includes closely monitoring and restructuring the welfare state and frivolous govt programs that are abused. The govt doesn't have to completely control an entire sector to protect the people. I see UHC in the United States as a big problem in terms of accessibility, abuse of the system, cost containment, the size of the US, etc., etc. I don't think the govt has to control 17% of our economy in order to provide the necessary safety nets desperately needed, which I have been hoping and praying for for a very long time. Take from Paul what is owed to Peter (Paul being the abuser of the welfare system driving the Escalade or what have you, and Peter being the one who is uninsurable and needs the govt to step in so they don't lose the shirt off their back). ETA: I was watching an HGTV show last night about first time home ownership. They broke down this particular person's down payment, and in it they included a $30K (or was it $35K?) govt GRANT. I had to turn it off. These are the wastes I'm speaking of. When did the US Govt give people down payments to own a home? Is this part of the stimulus package?

I don't think Obama is much of a threat on this one. I'm more concerned with the UN Rights of the Child and the impact it'll have on homeschooling freedom.

To the OP, I believe there is a moral obligation to care for those in need. This does not include UHC in my mind. I believe in HC reform and that there needs to be a larger safety net for the uninsurable, because in the case of major illness I do not want to see anyone lose everything they've worked for. I also believe the current system needs reform on many levels, the least of which is to address fraudulent denials for legitimate treatments. The idea of personal responsibilty (which to me, is a privilege) being taken away from the citizens of the US is a major moral issue for me. I strongly believe one of the worst things you can do to someone is to "take care" of them to the point that they are handicapped and can't/won't help themselves. The current welfare programs are abysmal. I see the abuse every. single. day. I admit, I am embittered by those I see using and abusing the system and wasting MY tax dollars, but I am happy to see those in true need get the temporary help they need to get back on their feet. My dh and I count it a privilege to help those in need. Truly, a privilege. However, the more and more we are taxed, the less we are able to do that, and that takes away something very meaningful to us.

Okay, I'll bite. How are illegals paying INTO the system if they're not paying taxes like the rest of us ? :001_huh:

Sara R, you are so right. I've had experience with micromanaging when I was head of triage for an HMO. I had a rule book, literally. It was a 300 page manual that addressed as many calls as they could imagine. People tried to book appts, and they would transfer the call to my triage dept. We were encourgaed to give them home-care advice when they really should be seen. I broke the rules so much by bringing them in to be seen that they were always lecturing me. You know why we had to ration? Because they took on SO MANY patients that they couldn't manage a decent patient to Dr. ratio. You CANNOT make health care decisions without seeing the patient!!!! How can a rule book or govt protocol know if this headache you state is the worst you've ever had in your entire life is a migraine or a subdural hematoma???? I didn't last but 18 months at that job because I felt like I did a huge disservice to my fellow man. Our proposed system will not work unless we deal with the illegal population and the fact that they aren't contributing a dime to the system, yet the system is bleeding cash to take care of them. Other countries with UHC apparantly don't have the same problem we do, unless I'm completely misinformed.:leaving: ETA: Obama made his intentions very clear tonight in his speech. He literally said, "I'll give you a very good example. Doctors are taking tonsils out because they will get paid more." By the grace of God, that reasoning had not gone into effect while my dd was having 10 second pauses in her breathing every night for a year, or else she would have serious health problems right now. "It could just be allergies" was the most ridiculous statement I've heard from this President, yet. Reminded me of my dark days working at an HMO. As far as I'm concerned, if I was ever on the fence, that statement alone would have sealed the deal for me. I would trust an insurance company to sniff out fraud like unnecessary tonsillectomies over the federal govt ANY day.

Thanks for your responses. Many of you have mentioned maintaining a rapport and I agree - I need to pop back in the office to say 'hello' for that reason alone. They are also seen by an EENT annually for the tubes that I decided to place in lieu of chronic antibiotics for the bad genetics they got from their Daddy, not me :D. Also, good advice on the eye exams. I'd rather them be checked out by an ophthalmologist for that even though no overt problems exist.

I ask because we can save $100 in copays if we forego it. In the past when we go, dc are weighed and measured. Doctor asks if their appetite is good. Check. They walk on their tippy toes and heels and they read from the eye chart. Then, the dreaded discussion about immunizations comes up. Once we agree to disagree on that, I walk out with exactly the same knowledge I had of my children when I was $35 richer (per kid). Am I doing them a disservice? I've skipped well checks for a couple years and the only thing we've been to the pediatrician for in the last 3 years was a bad swimmers ear that I couldn't manage at home. I feel I give them the best preventive care they could possibly have by the choices we make on a daily basis, and I don't know what else the Dr. could add to that, aside from telling me that dd3 is tall and dd2 is short. I'm curious to know how many go every year or forget about it when you know your kids are healthy?

May I ask what a good price for a chuck roast is? I used to buy it, when I didn't worry about price as much, but now that I am, I'm wondering when I should pick it up? I miss making dinner with it in the crock pot, and would love to try some of these recipes!