My son made this (purposely did NOT look at any recipe linked here) for Halloween and we handed it out. We used PB and other stuff. It is definitely crack! :) Good thing we can't get chocolate chips down here. We can get Lunetas (like M&Ms) and NO! STEP AWAY FROM THE COMPUTER! This is INSANITY! You people should be ashamed of yourselves. I am SO disappointed in you. (but it is cooooollllldddd (75F) and we neeeed sweeeeets to warm us uuuuuuppppp....) (i wonder how many miles i'd have to run if i made some of this...)

Will Susan let us say dickhead here? Your ex is a dickhead. I hope that justice will prevail for you and your family.

come to Mexico. You cannot get candycanes for either love or money down here. That could be the reason we moved here. To keep us away from the Candycane Jojos. :)

Oh my gods, yes. i have one child (#3) and you simply CANNOT fill her love tank. No matter what we do she is always wanting more more more more and feels terribly unloved whenver the SLIGHTEST criticism is hesitantly directed towards her. She is UBERsensitive. :) so I know where you're (the OP) coming from. I would still stop the punishments and continue to try to fill that love tank. The way I see it with my daughter, if we don't continue to try to fill hers she'll find someone who will. It has been YEARS for us-I remember the ages from 5 to 7 she cried constantly - all day, every encounter - she cried cried cried. She is now 9 and doesn't cry each and every day. That's progress, right? :) Seriously, I figure that this will be a decades-long project and we just keep plugging along. Another thing I do is to find 10 things, each and every day, that I can complement her on. Ten things that are unique to her, that are true, that boost her up. It also really helps her to hear how special she is and how much we love her (but that is true for all kids, but I think especially true with ours like this).

When I need inspiration, I turn to Doña Marta. And I just love love love Rolly.

It sounds like you are heavily invested in punishment. And from the way you've written your post, it seems like your kids is really feeling beaten down by the punishments. If he were my kid, I would immediately stop punishing and start connecting. His words sound painful to me and it sounds like he is hurting. Continuing to punish and escalating the punishments will probably just serve to prove to him how "bad" he is. He needs to feel good to act "good".

Oh! Sorry. I had no idea. I can't even begin to figure out how to do it without algebra though. Maybe *I* need to learn Sinagpore math.

I shop exclusively at thriftstores unless I can get new for the same price (AND it is Made in Mexico). One of the reasons we make a yearly trip to the US is to shop at thriftstores.

I did it differently. Adding everything together, you get 4b (books) + 5m (mags) +8b + 3m = $238 OR 12b + 8m =238 since 4b + 5m = 103.60 (from the word problem), then 4b=103.6 - 5m then 12b = 3 times 4b = 3 * (103.6 - 5m) = 310.8 - 15m substituting in the first equation, since 12b = 310.8 - 15m then, 310.8 - 15m + 8m = 238 and -7m = -72.80 so magazines = 10.40. From magazines we can get books from an earlier equation (4b=103.6-5m) and substitute 4b = 103.6 - (5 * 10.40) 4b = 103.6 - 52 4b = 51.60 books = 12.90 So, the answer (how much less does each mag cost vs each book) 12.90-10.40=2.50, so each magazine is cheaper by $2.50 than each book.

Well, as an ex-pat living in Mexico, I have to admit I'm a bit defensive on this subject. :) Do you not wash your produce before eating it?

Well, as someone heading back to family after 4 years I sure hope no-one asks me what our plans are because I assumed they were with everyone else! They might also be making this assumption if the country they live in is very family oriented (like ours is). If a relative of mine asked me what my plans were for the holiday I'd be incredibly insulted and feel very rejected! How about assuming they're coming, "so, are you guys headed to X for Turkey Day or were you planning to do something else?"

I very much agree. If I understand correctly he has lost his biodad (assuming you were married/together for that relationship) and now is losing another dad and I'm assuming has been uprooted through home changes? I'm guessing he is pretty pissed off. Add to that hormonal changes and puberty and if you continue to distance yourself from him and punish him you have the potential of creating a very angry young man. I agree with the counseling and the setting of the table is really just a symptom of something much deeper. Punishing is just going to drive him further away and more angry. It sounds like you really love your son and want the best for him - connect with him. Get counseling and give him autonomy in his life. It sounds like a lot has happened TO him without any say on his part (two men taken out of his life and I assume a physical move). That is a lot to deal with on top of teen hormones and the rages of puberty. Out of the moment, away from expectations, I would try and talk with him and recognize that he might see your talk as an attempt to Get Him To Do What You Want and not to simply connect. Keep trying until he understands that you're really trying to connect and not just control him. It may take a number of attempts before you can connect with him, but keep trying.

I so agree with your post (in the other thread). I am haunted today by Sophie's Choice more than any other movie I've seen but I also think it was a VERY important film. The agony of that choice and what it did to her and knowing that her choice was not an unusual choice is something that is very important for those in privileged society to understand. Most white Americans have no idea the privilege they count as normal daily life.

My answer today is very different than my answer would have been after 5 years together and I imagine it will be different again in another 10 or 20 years. I was 33 when I met my current partner and I had had Many Many Many long term and short term (and one night stands) relationships before I met him. And other than the one-night-stands I really think it was a good learning experience and something I'd want for my kids. I wandered from (almost) North Pole to (almost) South Pole and went as far in my career as I was interested in. I met many men from many cultures and learned a LOT that you just can't learn from books. When I met Jamie I knew it was different. I knew we'd be together. And he was TOTALLY NOT into me. Well, he was *into* me but scared. So he rejected me and strangley I just had a feeling of inner peace. I *knew* we'd be together so I just said, "ok" and inwardly said, "eventually you'll come around". :) We've been together for 15 years and each and every day he does something that annoys the hell out of me. I hate his feet (! :)). I hate the way he dries off after a shower (! :)). I hate the way he puts on deodorant. Little STUPID stuff. :) But I love the way he adores me, I love his openness, I love that he continues to try, I love that he is honest. And I can't imagine being with anyone else in this lifetime. At one time I would have said we're soulmates but I don't think that now. We don't complete each other but we definitely complement each other and work very well TOgether. I not only wouldn't want to be with anyone else, I can't imagine myself lowering my standards to someone else.

Everyone has their own comfort levels - looks like you've identified yours. Shark-infested waters? Do you not have single women where you live? :) If it were me (and it was me a few years ago) I had no problem with DH going. His co-workers also took him to a strip club and I had no problem with that either.

I have found my kids have all been able to identify and request the modesty they require. I still shower with my 7yo daughter and am occasionally naked around my 9yo, 12yo and 14yo's (getting dressed or undressed) and the 12yo had a period of time that he didn't want me naked. He was uncomfortable with it. I can't remember exactly how long it lasted (a year?) but he is now comfortable again. We are all very respectful of each others feeling and needs and rules haven't been necessary to enforce any "no bathing" or "no nudity".

Other - I think that they can be worth it if you don't pay full retail price. We bought pairs for the adults (my DH and myself) on our last US trip (last November). His are going strong but mine are coming apart on the fabric. Luckily we got them at REI and I have an email from them saying they'll exchange/refund them. I'm getting some on Ebay for my boys and picked up a pair for $5.99 at a thriftstore last US trip for my 9yo. She should fit into them now. I think they're worth the money but definitely NOT full retail. I'd get used. But I don't pay retail for anything.

while I don't agree that date=sex, I will admit that when my 14yo finally decides that the attention that the girls constantly are showing him is a good thing and not just an annoyance, I will probably assume that sex is a good probability. And if he becomes exclusive with someone (girl or boy; he has self-identified as hetero, but I'm open to fluid sexuality) I will assume that sex is happening and make sure he has appropriate protection.

Just because that was your experience, you really can't logically extrapolate it and apply it to society. I dated a LOT. I had a LOT of sex with MANY partners. I have been in a solid relationahip with my current (and lifetime) partner since 1993. I don't expect that to change. I carried no baggage other than childhood baggage into this relationship and had many long-term relationships prior to this one. I knew this one was different from the very beginning. Since we met I knew we'd always be together.

Good luck Joanne. I'll be thinking about you.

We live 80km south of Cancun. If they're already staying at an AI they probably won't want to leave but if they don't yet have accomodations, if they want to get off the tourist track (as described above - and nothing wrong with it, but it is where all the tourists go) head to Valladolid and/or Merida. I can give lots and lots of recommendations but I don't want to waste my time if they're already staying on the beach somewhere and just want to laze about in the sun (which is where we live, so I totally understand).

Here in Mexico the supermarkets regularly carry two products but I can only remember Microdyne (or something like that). We don't use anything but soaking all fruits and veggies in superchlorinated water - 1tsp bleach to 1 gallon water. But our tap water is not potable (well, it probably is but the piping contaminates it) so we even rinse dishes in superchlorinated water.

We tell them that sex can make a baby if you don't use protection but that it is also to express your love to your partner. We'd prefer their first experience be with someone they are partnered with, in a relationship with and I have pointed the 14yo to the scarleteen website for more emotional sexual relationship information. I really don't care how they self-identify or if their sexual identification is fluid. It is really not any of my business unless they want to involve me. I would support them in any (other than predatory) sexual connotation they desire. Masturbation is the BEST! We are big supporters of self satisfaction for a number of reasons - satisfying that sexual urge and getting to know you and your partner's body and how to please them. Porn is ok too. Not my first choice, but again, their sexual life, not mine. I would hope they expect sex to feel amazing. :) We've talked about protection and pregnancy but not yet about STDs. The 14yo is just not there yet, but we also don't do one BIG talk, but keep talking regularly, just like with everything else.