Amy in NH
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Posts posted by Amy in NH
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2 minutes ago, Ottakee said:
Would this person qualify for adult foster care/group home under community mental health? I know several similar people that are in adult foster homes.
Or maybe even respite care, to give you a break, @Spryte
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1 minute ago, kbutton said:
I like @wendyroo's phrasing.
Do you think she would do any better if she felt a greater sense of control over some details (not over people!)? I wonder if having a sort of standard menu for breakfast that she's helped choose that you know you can keep stocked reliably would help with something like the wrong kind of bread? If there is something real underlying the complaint that could be fixed (again, a need to have some control or a need to feel satisfied with choices, etc.), it might be worth trying. Then, if it's not helpful, you can feel like you've tried something that aims at the root. (That would make me feel better.)
Keeping in mind that our favorite food items have frequently been out of stock since the pandemic started.
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After re-reading your OP, I wanted to add that I think it is unreasonable for you to jump at her every whim. She's not a toddler, even if she is acting like one. You should be able to eat your meal in peace, and she can fix her own plate to her liking or wait until you're finished.
I know you can't change her, but I think you should also approach this the same way you would with a child. You know that she will never be satisfied, because it's not about the food/stairs/xyz - it's about the attention. By jumping to try to make things right every time she says boo, you are reinforcing the conditioning that she will get attention for her negative behavior.
If you stop engaging with her every complaint, she will eventually learn that her complaints don't get her the reward of attention that she is seeking. She may continue to complain just because she likes to, or she may learn to communicate differently to get attention. But I doubt she will throw herself on the floor for a screaming tantrum... and if she did, you could all just leave the room until she is finished, and then come back to finish your meal.-
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It is attention-seeking behavior. Didn't "they" always tell us not to reward bad attention-seeking by engaging or giving it any attention.
You could use wendyroo's suggestion to ask once if there's anything specific you could do, but she is certainly old enough 😉 to ask for specific help, and also to take care of it herself if there were something specific to be done to satisfy her.
So, I'd play music I like - into headphones around my neck if necessary - all-day every-day. Then when a complaint comes out, I'd just smile and sing along with my song. It would alleviate the awkward silence you mention if you don't say something, while also distracting your attention to something that gives you peace or joy.-
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This is our Christmas morning tradition:
Sour cream coffee cake
Mix:
1 stick butter
1 C sugar
2 eggs
½ tsp lemon juice
Mix:
2 C flour
2 tsp baking powder
1 tsp baking soda
¼ tsp salt
1 C sour cream
Grease and flour a tube pan.
Alternate adding sour cream and flour mixture until mixed.
Layer 1/2 batter, 1/2 topping, 1/2 batter. 1/2 topping - smoothing batter into the pan, and crumbling topping over it.
Bake 45 minutes to 1 hour at 350.
Topping:
½ C brown sugar
4 Tbsp flour
4 tsp cinnamon
4 Tbsp melted butter
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Diabetes insipidus was considered salt diabetes due to the imbalance of electrolytes, particularly sodium, in the bloodstream.
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10 minutes ago, cjzimmer1 said:
Another option on the bathroom door, is the kind that slide into the wall. They don't require any swing space at all. My parents have one, and it works and slides much easier than I expected (I thought for sure it would get stuck/be hard to slide on the track but I can easily slide it with one finger).
That's called a "pocket door".
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6 minutes ago, myblessings4 said:
Acute posterior septal myocardial infarction, massive
Arteriosclerotic cardiovascular disease
Diabetes mellitus
Massive sudden back-inner wall heart lost function,
which was caused by the muscle dying due to lack of oxygen
caused by hardened inflexible or blocked arteries,
as a result of type 2 (sugar) diabetes.
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Maybe the gift of a few singing lessons could help?
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Haven't read the other replies, so my terrifically unhelpful response is:
1. Buy a fast new computer
and
2. Upgrade your internet speed
You're welcome. 🤣
PS: The board doesn't usually load slowly for me, even with my old laptop and crummy DSL.
But it just took 30 seconds for the emoji screen to load.-
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Maybe take a look at "casita house" kits and prefabs.
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I have an intolerance to basil which causes almost immediate GI upset like you describe. I figured out what was causing the problem through trial and error, and discovered that I cannot tolerate foods with either fresh or dried basil.
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4 hours ago, Starr said:
I have family members that have who are otherwise not seeing anyone. They also did not go to a major vacation destination, took their own food and it was a couple of hour drive.
This is what we are doing for our 20th wedding anniversary. We had originally planned a trip to the Florida Keys, but instead we will drive to an AirBNB about an hour away and self-isolate there in a house all to ourselves together for a long weekend. They are doing extra deep cleaning in between visitors. The place we chose is on 35 acres with trails, so we'll bring our snowshoes and nordic skis. It has a full kitchen, so we'll pack groceries.
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17 hours ago, Farrar said:
And, honestly, on a homeschool board that's heavily Christian and white, I think we have to acknowledge that many of the options *we* have used for our children - namely home education and charter schools - have been a part of the problem in terms of funding. Many early homeschool families left the schools because they didn't like integration. Talking about how the schools were "bad" now was a proxy for complaining about race in many early homeschool communities. We probably all chose homeschooling because we wanted the best for our individual children. But this is something we have to grapple with, I think. Obviously we all believe in some measure of school choice. To what extent does that hurt equitable schools? Because it definitely does.
I'm only going to address the homeschool part of your post, because I think the rest of it is spot on...
I pay the same school property tax regardless of whether my kids attend or not. If my kids were in school, the number of kids they divide the school budget by would increase, so the cost per pupil would look lower, but the budget would not actually increase due to my kids' attendance there; their attendance would only suck the resource of teacher attention away from the other students. The school would not receive increased state funding for my kids attendance - all school funding in NH comes from local property taxes. So, I would argue that I am doing all of the other students in the school district a favor by keeping my kids home.Living in a racially homogeneous region, the one in which I was born, my kids would not be exposed to a greater number of minorities races if they were attending our local schools. I would argue that we participate in activities that expose them to a more racially and culturally diverse group than they would be getting in the schools. But honestly, their greatest exposure to intimacy within racial diversity is their interaction with the Hispanic uncle, the gay African-American auntie, and the adopted Chinese cousins and their continuing education to retain their cultural heritage.
I recognize that this is not the case for everyone, and I think we should all be mindful of these issues. And I also struggle to think that if these facts were not the case I would probably still not be willing to sacrifice my kids' individualized academic instruction and our family homeschooling lifestyle on those altars.-
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Not a scam.
Apparently my grandmother clipped my father's with her sewing scissors.I remember my sister having hers clipped in the peds office when she must have been 3-4, and I had to have my oldest's done when they were the same age. Wish they had done it in infancy, but it is what it is. No extra exercises needed, nor waking anyone at night.
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4 minutes ago, regentrude said:
My experience agrees. But then, many of the BIPOC people in this town are themselves better educated than the average white person in the (90.7% white) county.
My rural county is 95.76% white.
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1 hour ago, Tanaqui said:
You know, I am fully capable of recognizing racist dogwhistles when you blast them in my face.
If I thought that, I would have said that. I don't believe in mincing my words or hiding my meaning behind anodyne sentiment.
Ouch. I had to go back to see where the dogwhistle was. I guess you could read it that way, but I didn't due to my own experiences living in a rural, 90+% caucasian area. I know for a fact that there are many people here who do not value education - and I would guess most of them are white. In fact, the BIPOC people I've known in this area (and elsewhere!) seem to value education more than many of the poor, rural, white people I've known.
I actually attended an IEP meeting, as a trained volunteer special-ed advocate, to support a mom who was begging the school to add before-school homework assistance to her kid's IEP. Her husband was telling the kids they didn't need to do their homework - because he didn't and he's doing just fine (as a 40+ yo worker in one of the few local factories). The kid was only interested in going to school to play sports, so the regular after-school homework clubs would interfere with sports practice. If they didn't keep the grades up the kid would be kicked off the teams, and despite our state truancy and dropout laws the kid would then refuse to attend school at all. What can the mother do to fight that in her own home, with the father acting as the authority and over-riding her every attempt to get the kid to study? She can't make the kid go to school - even if she were big and strong enough to physically force them, how would she keep them there and make them pass?
I used to think like @Clemsondana, that I wanted to improve education when my kids are grown. For the past 20 years I've volunteered in multiple capacities as an education advocate to gain skill and experience, while pushing my own personal education to the max, in preparation for this goal. Now I'm jaded. I am tired of fighting to improve the lives of people who not only don't care, but don't want to be improved. They don't want better for themselves or their own kids. It's baffling. And demoralizing. You can't force other people to become educated, and they'll fight tooth and nail to make sure their kids aren't educated either. I think some steps in the right direction are noted above, but I don't know what the solution is.-
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25 minutes ago, Corraleno said:
WASHINGTON — When Health and Human Services Secretary Alex Azar announced this week that the federal government would begin releasing coronavirus vaccine doses held in reserve for second shots, no such reserve existed, according to state and federal officials briefed on distribution plans. The Trump administration had already begun shipping out what was available beginning at the end of December, taking second doses directly off the manufacturing line.
Now, health officials across the country who had anticipated their extremely limited vaccine supply as much as doubling beginning next week are confronting the reality that their allocations will not immediately increase, dashing hopes of dramatically expanding eligibility for millions of elderly people and those with high-risk medical conditions. Health officials in some cities and states were informed in recent days about the reality of the situation, while others are still in the dark.Where is the ANGRY emoji?
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We're pretty sure our indoor/outdoor kitty was "taken" by a bobcat we saw in the backyard shortly after she disappeared midsummer.
We got brother/sister kittens in October, along with a 6+ft cat tree. They LOVE the tree.
They haven't been outside yet, and when they start going out next summer we'll try to make sure they're always in at night.
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1 hour ago, PeterPan said:
Just an aside, how do you make your avocado toast? I've never had it, but I wonder if ds would like it. If I have Trader Joe's guacamole in little containers, can I spread that on? Or would that be totally wrong and gross and not right? LOL
We butter a sliced onion bagel and grill it in a small frying pan using an iron to press it flat.
Dot with ketchup, and top with diced avocado.
Using a fork, in a small bowl mix up an egg with a pinch of salt.
After beating 10-15x, add 1Tbsp water and beat another 10-15x.
Pour egg into the same heated pan, and use a silicone spatula to push egdes into a bagel-sized round.
Pepper the egg, place a slice of thinly sliced swiss on top, then cover with a lid and turn the heat to low
Let sit for 1-2 minutes before tipping onto a half bagel
Repeat with another egg for the other bagel half.
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We live in the mountains, with ponds and lakes all around us.
The Lakes Region of NH is only an hour away, and the ocean is 2-3 hours.
NH is sort of the best of all worlds?
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I didn't mean for my story to make you sad or upset, but to show you that even if the diagnosis turns out to be a tumor, it could be managed for a long time and your daughter could still lead a long life with manageable health consequences.
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3 minutes ago, Home'scool said:
If it is an establishment that is flouting the protocols we can go in and work with them through education, etc. In the case of the law firm their website listed out a whole procedure for doing business (they handle real estate) .. you text when you get to the parking lot, they come out with a clipboard and clean pen, with masks, and handle paperwork that way. After speaking with them and hearing and reading their protocols we were satisfied. I don't think people would be able to make all that stuff up about fogging their offices and cleaning protocols without actually doing all of it.
I received two phone calls today from people telling on their neighbors. They state that they know someone in the next door house is COVID positive but they have workers and delivery people going in and out .... that we cannot do anything about. We do not go into private houses for that. And frankly I am shocked at how much neighbor turns on neighbor in this situation. Some people would love nothing more than to be the COVID police and turn people in. They literally want us to PUNISH them. UUgh
Honestly, if they have active COVID and are purposely interacting with others then they DESERVE to be punished.
Just like the courts have ruled with HIV, people knowingly spreading a deadly disease should be stopped and criminally prosecuted.Criminal charges for spreading HIVA person can be charged with criminal transmission of HIV when "he or she, knowing that he or she is infected with HIV: (1) engages in intimate contact with another; (2) transfers, donates, or provides his or her blood tissue, semen, organs, or other potentially infectious body fluids for transfusion, transplantation, ...https://journalofethics.ama-assn.org/article/hiv-transmission-it-crime/2002-06 -
My grandmother died in 1989 at age 80 due to complications from a surgery to remove a slow growing tumor around her pituitary gland. The tumor had been there for ~40+ years, and was originally found due to the onset of diabetes insipidus she developed as a result of pressure on her pituitary. Over time, the tumor grew to put pressure on her optic nerve, and she was slowly going blind. My grandfather died in 1965, and she lived alone for all of those years; she was living in her own apartment in an elderly housing complex when she decided to have surgery to remove the tumor due to her loss of vision. The steroids she had been taking for many, many years to keep the tumor from growing thinned her skin, which led to the complication in ICU causing her death.
Best wishes for testing and diagnosis!
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A book traumatized me tonight and I'm angry!
in The Chat Board
Posted
Dumbledore 😭