:grouphug:praying

Did you not get a recipe book? It's supposed to come with an amazing recipe book and DVD. If you didn't get it, you should call the company. I love the tortilla soup. You take three roma tomatoes, a carrot, a wedge of cabbage, a thick (2" or so) slice of zucchini or yellow squash, a sliver of onion, 3 cups of boiling water or chicken broth, a tablespoon of chicken base if you did the water and some taco seasoning. I just make my own, I think it's about a half tsp each of salt and chili powder plus a pinch of oregano and some black pepper and a few dashes of paprika. Then you puree that on high for 5 minutes or so. Then you turn the speed down and you can add a can of black beans or some corn and a cooked chicken breast or some tortilla chips. I usually do apple juice for sweetener, about 2 cups. Then a bunch of spinach. Then I puree that on high til the spinach is liquified. Then I add two bananas and some frozen fruit. Costco here sells a blend of frozen strawberries, pineapple, mango, and papaya. DH likes to make one with three oranges, a carrot, two bananas and the frozen fruit blend. I also love the peanut butter and hummus. For the peanut butter you just use 3 cups roasted peanuts and puree it on high (must use the tamper for that one). The hummus I used was from the recipe book, I can't remember it off the top of my head. I tried making the almond milk once, it was beyond nasty.

Rameumptom

Well, maybe that's my problem. We aren't spending enough. We were at our one year mark and they wanted us to spend $55 to upgrade so that they could send us $40 back. Why? It's not making sense. Ok, if I did my math right, you need to spend more than $5,500 there in one year to get more than your $110 back. That's about $458.33 a month. That's more than I spend there, we only do about $200 a month. When they scan my card, they can see how much I need to spend, yet they still push it. I just don't know why.

Why do they push this so hard? I swear, every time we went there it was like being badgered by a telephone salesman. And I'm not sure the math makes sense to me. If you don't spend enough, they'll send you back the difference. Why do this at all? Why bother signing people up if you're going to give it back? Should I be signing up for it? At this point, I've been refusing out of principle: If they're going to be that pushy about it, I'm going to think it's some kind of scam and stay away just out of spite. (That and the math still doesn't make sense to me). The terms: If you spend $55 on a year's membership, you don't get any money back at the end of the year. If you spend $110 on a year's membership, they give you 2% of your total spent back at the end of the year. If you buy the $110 membership and didn't spend enough to get $110 back, they give you the difference between the 2% you are owed and the cost of the basic membership.

Hypnobabies, Hypnobabies and more Hypnobabies. Anything that can take the pain away is wonderful. Also laboring in a tub is wonderful. With Digby I labored in the tub and got out to push. With Chuck I labored and delivered in the tub. If I were to have another one, I'd probably go with the labor and get out to push. Congratulations.

Thank you! I know you were and I appreciate it. Sorry, I was on my phone at the time, which then started wonking out. Anyway, I just didn't want the other part to be overlooked. Veritaserum, there are two reasons for using that argument. :001_smile:

No, but I'm recognizing some signs with my mother that I dislike. :glare: I've been so worried about DH's parents for seven years that I totally forgot about her!!!

"Dh, if she didn't want to manipulate you, she would have just come out and said, 'You are a selfish and greedy brother unless you give your sister money.' The fact that she got you to FEEL that way without saying it is what makes it manipulative." I'm so sorry it's causing so many problems. In the case of my parents it was like a battering ram that came over and over and over. I'll pray that counseling helps.

it is a true and valid reason, but the point was more to get MIL out without Verituserum having to say, "we need to get MIL out".

1. How old were you with each of your homebirths or homebirths that transferred (Please do not include any planned hospital birth) 24 and 26 2. Tell me 3 or more reasons why you chose homebirth. a) It was cheaper and I was uninsured. I was convinced of it's safety, so went with the cheaper route. b) My midwife for the first homebirth had a masters in midwifery. I figured that was almost as good as a doctor. :lol: My midwife with the second was a complete angel. I told DH after our initial consultation that I'd have a dozen more kids just to have her as a midwife. c) I was angry that doctors and nurses KNEW that epidurals can slow down labor. And if labor slows down they use pitocin. And sometimes pitocin causes babies to be in distress. The distress means that it's hurting the baby. I thought it ridiculous that we wouldn't willingly cause baby pain on the outside of the womb but it was ok on the inside. All that knowledge pissed me off. Still does 3. What about having a homebirth helped you with any physical and/or psychological needs. With my first homebirth, I labored in the tub and got out to push. With my second, I labored and delivered in the tub. The tub is a miracle worker. Definitely makes it much easier to work through. I don't think the hospital I would have had to go to has tubs. TMI, but going to the bathroom while in labor was pleasanter at home, no catheter. Catheters terrify me. With my first homebirth, I did not want to eat or drink at all. I forced myself to drink some water and threw it up. With my second, I ate and drank a little here and there as I wanted. Also, with my second, my MW's assistants would push on my hips and knees and back to help with contraction pain and to help with positioning. It worked wonders.

What I feel is hard to describe. It doesn't fit with my religion at all. I guess I feel like He's somewhat apathetic toward me. I don't feel it at all, although I know he does. I guess I have a lot of self-esteem and other issues, but I don't feel it personally. Plus, I see all the suffering in the world and think He's more like, "It doesn't matter how bad it gets, you're still supposed to praise me anyway." I see people around me with lots of blessings and saying, "God is good, look at all the blessings He gave me" while everyone else is supposed to say, "God is good, look at all the blessings He didn't give me"? Like I said, it's weird and hard to describe.

If it were me, I'd recognize the fact that DH and I needed to get on the same page ASAP. "DH, we are not unified here and unless we get unified, seriously problems are going to arise in our marriage." I wouldn't say it was the direct cause of their divorce, but my parents lack of unity in money and in law issues put a serious strain on their marriage for the entire 30 years. (They had other issues as well; those two were only part of it and they weren't combined with each other like they are in your case.) Ok, in my hypothetical world, I would not show DH this thread. He would probably get defensive and feel attacked. I would calmly sit him down and say, "We are at opposite ends of the spectrum here. A compromise is not one of us getting our way and the other getting nothing. A compromise is when we meet in the middle." And then you would on paper, state his case and then state your case. If at any time emotions get hot, the other can call a five minute break. In our home, I'm usually the emotional, angry one and when I hit that point, I withdraw. DH is more even tempered, but always likes to figure it out right then. His forcing a resolution only increases my bitterness. Time out breaks are necessary. Things you might want to consider pointing out: your DH might be a more "here and now" type of person. You might be a more "long term vision" type of person. If this is the case you need to point out that God put the two of you together so that both would get done. He is right; the here and now must be taken care of. You are also right; you guys need to be planning and saving for retirement and college. (At least this is how it is in our marriage. DH was much happier when I conceded he was right too). You are willing to solve this short term problem so long as he is willing to come up with a long term solution for when this problem comes up again. Compromise, compromise, compromise. If you suggest that DH tell his mother that you guys are willing to help out if SIL talks to you guys personally and not through her, he will probably balk. "But that would humiliate her and it would seem like we are gloating." Your defense to this ought to be along the lines of: "We are hearing this second hand. Her finances are none of MIL's business and how we help her is none of MIL's business. I don't want to hear from SIL personally to humiliate or gloat over her, I just want to get an accurate picture of what is going on. I promise we will be exceedingly kind and understanding." (Fake the sympathy if you have to, it may be a battle lost, but could help win the war). Then once you meet with SIL, you guys discuss again and meet in the middle. Again remember, compromise is not one person winning and the other losing. You state your positions again on paper, "I don't want to give her any money" and "I think we ought to give her X amount of dollars." Then meeting in the middle would involve something like, "Well how about if we give her Y amount of dollars in a grocery store gift card." Or directly paid her gas bill or something.

:iagree: You and DH need to come up with a long term plan. Because it is going to happen again and again and again. Every time it does it's going to cause an argument. You need to settle it once and for all.

If you do this, you will thank yourself in about a month. Maybe less. We went through and now I have 3 short sleeve shirts, 4 half sleeve shirts and about 4 long sleeve shirts, three pairs of jeans and four shorts/capris and two skirts. DH has his 5 work shirts and work pants, plus two pairs of jeans and I'd guess about 4-5 regular tshirts. He also has his church clothes. Pigby has 7 long sleeve shirts and three pairs of pants. I'm not exactly sure where Digby's at because I just had to put away all his 24 m clothes and I haven't counted how many 2T were left. It's not that many. Chuck has 4 outfits and 3 pajamas. It is the most wonderful thing in the world. Seriously. I wish I had enforced this from the very beginning.

The Excalibur is the best, I think. I have a round Nesco and I dislike it. This website is amazing

I gave myself one box. I went through and put the cutest and favorites in the box. Everything else went to the thrift store or to my mom's house to save for the next grandbaby (you know, for the sisters who aren't even married yet:confused:). It was very difficult as I have the hoarder mentality (guess where it came from) and all those clothes had emotions attached to them. Sometimes you have to go through a pile several times to really wheedle it down. But once they are out the door you don't miss them. You can take pictures if you want, they take up less space.

Congratulations, she's beautiful. How funny, just yesterday I was thinking about you guys and wondering if baby had come.

:iagree:I so agree. I'm so sorry. I know this hurts, but please don't make him go through that again.

Thank you!

Oh I'm so sorry. I could never co sleep either; arm went to sleep and I was trapped and unable to move or baby would wake. This is what I got when Pigby was a few days old. He was a baby who absolutely needed to be held in order to sleep. I put this insert in the car seat and it tricked him into thinking he was being held. It did not work at all for Digby, he was just so inconsistent about everything. And for Chuck, I put it in her bouncy seat and let her sleep there. For the two it did work with, they only needed it for a few weeks, then they transitioned to their bassinets fine. All three have nice head shapes, I don't think it would hurt that. Also, how thick is his mattress pad? My bassinet had a ridiculously thin pad and I'm sure they probably could have felt the screws and metal bits underneath. I put some folded towels under neat the pad so it was thicker. I figured that if they were in a crib, they'd have a thick mattress. It was not thick enough to pose any sort of suffocation hazard.

Yup, completely normal. I personally think there is nothing cuter than a fat baby. Pigby and Chuck were both ginormous. Both my midwife and pediatrician said it was wonderful how big they got; it's the greatest overall indicator of health. Digby was always a very tiny little peanut, so I think little tiny peanuts are the cutest too (so long as they are healthy and not starving). You know, all babies are extremely adorable no matter their size; that's just how God made them :D. Even if your friend's baby outgrows the infant seat, he will probably slow down around six months. Once they start rolling and scooting and crawling, they don't gain as quickly. Baby girl Chuck only gained 6 ounces between her 6 and 9 month appointment. She went from 95th percentile for weight to 15th.

I'm so sorry. It's just so sad. :grouphug: I would bring the Ipad and let him sit next to you while he uses it. If it attracts the attention of the other kids, I personally wouldn't let them all use it; not to be spiteful, but because I'd be worried about fighting over it and it getting broken.

You would rather your son have a negative extended family celebration than a positive immediate family celebration? If you left Thanksgiving in tears, what positive comes from these get togethers? You can't change them, I would just accept it for what it is and not go. :confused: No snark intended, just :grouphug:. From what you say, it doesn't sound like things will change.

Wow, some absolutely amazing stuff. I wish I had some felt or some pool noodles now! :D And I'm sorry to hear about your separation. Hugs and prayers for you. :grouphug: May you have a wonderful Christmas