So....I should definitely keep the tub/shower combo. Glad you all agree w/ me. :tongue_smilie: I think there's a little confusion, though, the design I showed is not exact. It's just the closest I could find. The tub/toilet area includes a sink. There is an additional sink in a separate room. Yes, we are planning on pocket doors. I love pocket doors! :001_smile: It seems that most of you would rather have a curtain instead of doors. Is that true? (Y'all are awesome, by the way!)

I do hear what y'all are saying about just making it one larger room, but suppose you have 3 kids upstairs all trying to get ready for school at once, wouldn't you want an extra sink to access while someone else is in the shower/toilet? And who wants to haul their toothbrush downstairs if their main bathroom is occupied? Do they plan on keeping their toothbrush in their bedroom just in case the bathroom is busy in the morning? This is not an uncommon design, so I don't think anyone is going to wonder where the toilet is. This is basically the floor plan we're looking at. Currently, there are double sinks in the sink area. We would move the wall to put one sink in the tub/toilet area and keep one sink in a separate area. It's not an uncommon design, so I don't think anyone is going to wonder where the toilet it. It's really more of one bathroom that's been divided. And yes, we are planning on pocket doors. I'm not trying to be difficult. I am listening and considering what you're saying. I just want to make sure we're all understanding each other. I am seriously considering making it one large bathroom, but I just see more advantages to being able to close one door and still have the rest of the upstairs occupants able to access a sink.

Well, it sounds like tub wins! Honestly, I was leaning toward that, but I wanted some additional feedback. :001_smile:

There's not enough room to do another toilet. Currently, the bathroom is split with the tub & toilet in one room and two sinks in the other. We do have a realtor. I might shoot him an email, but I was curious what actual moms liked.

We're going to be redoing our upstairs bathroom. We're also wanting to sell soon, as in, this year. Our goal in all our repairs and remodels is to sell this home as a move-in ready, family home. So here's the breakdown: There are three bedrooms upstairs and a full bath. There's also a half bath and the master bath downstairs. The master bath has a nice, long tub. I loved it when it came to giving kiddos a bath. I could easily fit three in it, and the larger master bathroom gave me plenty of room to move and take care of the kids. There's ample room between the sinks, and I even used that space as a changing table for a little while. The upstairs bathroom is cramped. We're going to maximize space as much as possible, but still, it's just not as much room. The upstairs bathroom will be split in two rooms: a bathroom plus a small powder room (just a sink). This is necessary because we have SIX kids upstairs, and they need to be able to get to a sink when the tub/toilet area is occupied. (Think everyone having to brush teeth in the mornings while you're all trying to get out the door at the same time.) So, with all that in mind, would you keep a tub in the upstairs bathroom, or would you put a walk-in shower? It really is so much easier to bathe little ones downstairs, that I don't see that being an issue. The upstairs bathroom would be for those old enough to take baths/showers on their own. If you were looking to buy a house, how important is it to you to have a bathtub versus having a very nice, walk-in shower? Here's a picture of a bathroom similar to what we'd do if we keep a tub. It's even got almost the same amount of space, which you can tell is not much: Here's another image of what we're thinking with a walk-in shower:

exactly why I said this

He has done several different things, which I take as meaning that depending on the year, it depends on what he does...not that he did nothing. It just varied on what he did do. AND, if could manage it during dating, he showed that he could do it if it was important to him. They also talked about it, just a matter of days ago.

I know that there are many people who struggle w/ holidays and gifts, however, apparently, your dh has shown that in the past he has been quite capable of rising to the occasion with dinner out, flowers, or gifts. He has past experiences to draw on. He knows you appreciate those things. He's done it before. So why now, when the two of you are supposed to be putting extra effort toward each other, does he "forget"? People don't do something before and then stop because they somehow lost the capability of doing it. They stop because, for whatever reason, it is no longer important enough for them to do it. And if he deemed it important enough to do before, then for crying out loud, why not now, when his marriage is on the line! So, no, I don't buy those excuses either. But, while I think you're justified in being upset, and I would be pretty upset myself, I do want to say that after going to marriage counselling, I realize that my dh's brain just doesn't interpret things the way that I'd expect. I'd still be hurt, but I'd also very clearly explain why I'm hurt and see what his response is. I strongly suggest marriage counselling, because it helps having someone else saying things besides just you. It helps you both define and refine your expectations of each other. And it's cheaper and less messy than divorce. And if divorce is in the future, I would want to know that I exhausted all other avenues before I subjected my kids to a divorce. And honestly, for myself, going to marriage counselling was a last-ditch effort which I should have done sooner.

I was on a jury for a murder trial recently. That was terrible but interesting, too. I was VERY glad they had a video of the actual incident, because while I knew the guy was a dirty, controlling, abusive...and ultimately, murderous...s.o.b., without the video evidence, there wasn't enough evidence for a conviction. But there was a video, thanks to the scumbag's own video surveillance. He pulled his gun, waved it and threatened his girlfriend, then shot her (on camera). He then proceeded to move her from one vehicle to another and calmly walk around getting rid of stuff [drugs, probably, but we couldn't see what] while she bled out and died. And it was all caught on film. Guilty on all counts. It amazes me that he actually plead not guilty! I hope they locked him up and threw away the key. :cursing: :cursing: :cursing: (Still very fresh in my memory.)

OP, it really sounds like you have not learned how to stand on your own. You are allowing yourself to be manipulated and coerced when you KNOW what they want it wrong. You're second-guessing yourself because others are questioning you. You need to learn to trust your instincts! And you really need to read up on abuse, manipulative and controlling behaviors, and how abusers groom their victims as well as those who are in charge of their victims. YOU ARE BEING GROOMED RIGHT NOW. You either allow yourself to be further pushed and blinded, or you stop it now.

^^^ This was meant to be encouraging and empowering, a :thumbup1: you-can-do-this! :thumbup1: pep talk. I'm not sure that my tone came across like that. :glare:

Just wanted to say that unless your kid is in high school, teachers/administrators can fuss and whine and threaten all they want, but unless you go above the limit on unexcused absences, there is very little they can do otherwise. Missing 3 days of school should not be a problem, unless there are other unexcused absences. He can catch up. So, yeah, pull out the credit card and take the kids somewhere while they're at the house. Draw that line and stick with it. No one, especially your mil, is going to take you seriously unless you put power behind your words. :grouphug: And while you're gone, set a definitive "move out" date.

Oh, I like this idea! You could glue them directly to the back of the box, and hang the box. It would make such a pretty showcase and protect them, too!

I think they're cute, btw. My grandmother had some, too.

I would super glue some twine on the back to form a loop. Or use some other heavy-duty glue from the hardware store.

A few months ago, my dh & I started marriage counselling. "Finding a counselor who fits for you" was not so much the problem as finding one that had availability! By the time I got to wanting therapy, I was ready for it THEN, not two months down the road. Then, once we did find a counselor, the first couple of sessions I found rather frustrating because I was ready to dive into some issues, but we needed a couple of sessions just so the counselor could really get a grasp of the issues. I say all that to let you know that I've found it worthwhile, but it takes a while, too! Personally, I have found the most help for my marriage in learning about ME. With that in mind, I just finished reading a book that I loved and found very helpful, if that's where you are. Untame Yourself (I personally found the cover image a little off-putting, btw, but the book itself was great.) I also second the recommendation for Boundaries.

Nerf Rebelle -- Nerf guns for girls! Or, you could just get plain old Nerf guns, too. But the Rebelle guns are way cuter, IMO. LEGOs

My beliefs tend to be rather eclectic, but I have never believed that God's will is some secret that they have to figure out. (1) If someone has a strong desire to do something, that is probably from God. (And by strong desire, think classic versus trendy. God-given desires are classic. Trendy wants come from self or ego.) "Follow your heart" is a very good saying--as long as one learns to identify "heart" as being that still, small voice of God and not ego. If it is others-driven, then it is very likely from God. If it is self-driven, it is likely from ego. Teens are very much still learning to distinguish between self/ego and God. (Many Christians term this flesh vs. spirit, so maybe you've heard of it that way.) Maybe that's why... (2) Often only one step at a time is given. Given that every step taken is a learning process, as long as you're taking steps, you're learning. I would tell mine that even in retrospect, steps that seem to have been wrong are not bad, they still help you to grow. Don't be afraid to take steps.

I get it. It's often used in a way that keeps girls from standing up for themselves or voicing their opinions. But for my kids, "bossy" is an equal opportunity word. I call out the boys more for being bossy than the girls. To me, being bossy is ordering others around without regard to their feelings. I don't handle that well regardless of gender.

My dh isolates himself in the bedroom when things get a bit too much to handle. Having a puking kid on the couch is just not something he can handle being around, and that's okay, but why make the kid suffer more than he already is with being sick?

Personally, I think he is just absolutely PERFECT for this position (and I think they know it, too!) so he'd have to really screw up the interview to lose it. Wearing shorts to the interview might do it, but certainly not the same suit. Still, he's super stoked about this, and he wants to put forth as best of an impression as he can make. I will suggest a different color shirt, though. My thoughts are that, as a guy, unless he was wearing something particularly flashy or edgy, no one will probably even remember what he wore to the first interview other than he wore a suit! Kinda the way the anchor did on Leav97's post. *sigh* Sometimes, I'm envious of that. Other times, I think I'd get very tired of it if it were me.

A sports jacket to work would be too formal for everyday. It's the interview itself he's thinking of.

A full suit for the interview is nice, but it's not something he'd wear at work, unless it's for some sort of board meeting or something.

This is exactly what I was thinking!

My dh is a professional engineer. He's going to a second interview soon, but he only has one really nice suit. He doesn't wear suits to his current job. He won't be wearing suits in the new job. So...should he wear a different suit to the second interview, or would the same suit w/ a different tie be fine? The new job is not a huge corporation, but rather a smaller municipality. The second interview is a lunch interview, so a bit more informal. It's an interview, so my dh thinks he should wear a white shirt regardless of what suit because that's "standard." What do you think?